Foreigner Need Warmth

Suddenly I came to my senses.

The surroundings are cold, with a lethargic feeling as if I just woke up from sleep.

But when I opened my eyes, I couldn’t see anything.

Even if you try to move your body, it doesn’t move.

No, it’s not that I’m not moving, I can’t feel my body at all.

What is this?

I just feel like I’m floating and a chill that’s so unpleasant.

Even if I try to scream, I just feel frustrated and no sound comes out.

Let’s think about it carefully.

Just a moment ago, I came home from work after a long day and cracked open a bottle of alcohol. So logically speaking, I drank alcohol and passed out.

I fell asleep drunk. It’s strangely cold. So is it still dawn?

So am I stuck in a cage?

No matter how much I think about it, that’s all there is to it.

If you can’t move your hands or feet or open your eyes, then what else could it be but scissors?

But there is a sense of floating, along with an unpleasant chill. A feeling of floating in the air and a strange chill that seeps deep into the bones.

Is this a dream?

Then I’ll wake up someday.

So I waited.

But it couldn’t happen.

I’ve sworn, I’ve cursed, I’ve begged, I’ve done everything I can.

But it couldn’t happen.

I waited until the cold slowly seeped in until I could no longer recall what warmth felt like.

But it couldn’t happen.

No matter how long I waited, no matter how much I screamed without a sound, nothing changed in this cold, empty darkness.

I’ve been waiting.

I stayed still.

Because I couldn’t move in the first place.

Then suddenly I discovered a light.

Bright light and warm warmth.

I knew as soon as I saw it. There was something I wanted there.

But I forgot.

That I can’t move.

That I had no choice but to just look up.

The lights increased one by one.

What I wanted was right there, I had to just look up.

What your heart desires is up there, what you cannot give up is up there, what you must have is up there.

Now the light fills the sky above like the night sky.

As I constantly look up from under the water, I find myself reminiscing over memories of a time when I was a person who now seems so distant, yet so terribly haunting.

I try to imagine the warmth of a memory that has become so worn out from looking at a photograph that I can no longer remember even a trace of it.

Of course, you can’t feel it.

Then a light fell.

Down.

Down.

Down.

Fondant.

Beyond sleep and below.

in the end.

The light illuminated the deep sea, and only then did I realize that this was not the sea.

Above the water, beyond the sky.

I know that the shining stars are not the real shining stars.

There was no sea.

The sea was me.

Light is a dying life, screaming at the end.

A life that died cursing the world, full of resentment and despair.

As I rolled it around, I felt a very faint warmth for the first time in a long time.

It was sweet and delicious, like eating ice cream after weeks of only eating rice.

If you didn’t know anything, this would have been enough.

Unfortunately, I know this tastes bitter.

Because they were unlucky, because the world had abandoned them, because they had simply done bad things, because the country was bad. Only those who had fallen down the social ladder, hated someone, or had despaired of everything came to me one by one.

Only the lives that have fallen to the bottom come to me.

As I tasted that light little by little, I saw how that life had lived.

Of course, that time is very fleeting, and after a brief moment of sucking, it disappears quickly.

Then we had to wait a very long time for the next light to fall.

One, two, three, four.

I was waiting for it to fall intermittently, and at one point it didn’t fall on me for a very long time.

A very long time.

I have no sense of time at all, so I don’t know if it really took that long or if it really didn’t take that long!

So I decided to reach out to the light that was close to me under the water.

And it arrived.

Huh? That’s weird.

When did I ever have hands?

No matter how much I think about it, I don’t remember ever moving anything like this.

But more than that, I had a greater longing to feel warmth after a long time.

The hand slowly flowed and touched the light. Of course, it was not easy to rise above the water surface. Even though I had my hand, I could only waver as if there was an invisible wall.

But little by little, and finely, the country condenses the sea, compresses it into needles, and up, up, up.

And then a hand, so thin it was almost invisible compared to the light, reached up and touched the light that was floating just above the water.

It was not a dead life like before, but a life that was still alive.

It’s a cracked bowl that looks like it’ll break in despair, but it’s much warmer!

The light took hold of my hand.

A life with its own unfortunate past held my hand tightly, asking me to save it.

But I had nothing to give.

What can I do if there is nothing I can do?

Then I saw my slender hand floating above the water.

Should I give you more?

As I pushed myself up, I was blocked by an invisible wall as strong as a wall, but my hand broke through it and I went up.

The light is rejoicing.

He laughed as if he had gained tremendous strength in his hands, but soon stopped laughing.

And scream.

Stop it. Stop it.