episode_0079

At lunchtime after class, I ate lunch with Hermel and then came to the trail to take a short walk.

Hermel thought for a while about going for a walk, then shook his head and said he was going to the gym and left. I was worried that he might follow me and be a bother, but I was unfounded.

Good is good. With that in mind, I started walking alone on the trail.

Jump–Jump–

As I walked quietly without thinking, clearing my mind, I sighed in indescribable frustration.

Why is it suddenly like this? Did I eat something wrong? I felt the corners of my mouth twist in frustration that came so suddenly, so I held out a fan to cover my mouth.

Obviously, as soon as menstruation started, I put a curse on my uterus and made it unable to function properly, so why did I suddenly feel so frustrated?

‘What do I have to be frustrated about?’

The affairs of the mansion could now be handled through Sarah. Not only that, but the most frustrating part, checking progress, has also been resolved as you will receive periodic reports from Sarah.

There is no way Sarah would even betray me. Because it was made that way. There is nothing I should be frustrated about.

And Ceria, there is no need to touch this side anyway. If you wipe out all the people around you, it will break down on its own.

“Umm.”

Then why am I so frustrated? I walked quietly and tried to think of a reason, but there was no good reason for the emotional ups and downs that came so suddenly.

It was literally an emotional ups and downs that came ‘out of the blue’.

As I continued to think quietly, I quietly looked down at the floor.

Crunchy――

Feeling the warm spring air, I saw ants crawling out of the ground, and an unknown insect catching and eating the ants.

The ant struggled not to die, but the body caught by the insect did not move at all.

Every time the insect wiggles its thick jaws, the ant’s limbs are torn apart, and eventually the head and abdomen separate, and the ant’s head falls off with a snap.

After watching that scene for a moment, I slowly walked in front of it and carefully stepped on an insect that was eagerly chewing on the dead ant.

Kujik――

I came to my senses after hearing a very subtle feeling in my toes, and only then did I realize the identity of this frustration.

“It was boring… … ?”

It was just boring. This peaceful life was just boring to the point of death. As I was quietly holding my breath, waiting for the right moment, this moment was tightening me like a leash.

I’ve been doing whatever I want since I lost my mind, so how can I not be frustrated with this dull daily life?

Killing people was common, kidnapping lovers and making them kill each other, and even masturbating while watching a faithful church member lose his mind and rape his own daughter.

Considering that the worst time was when I masturbated with a corpse… … . under. okay… … . It’s boring. I’ve lived such a stimulating life, but this boring daily life shouldn’t be fun.

“… … .”

After learning the root of this feeling, emotions that had been quiet until now began to boil over.

Let’s turn everything over right now. Is it really necessary to put in the effort and do it one by one? You have enough power to do that, so why don’t you use it?

I calmed down the emotions that seemed to overflow at any moment and smiled a little.

So, what is different from before? Who ran like a dog and got his head cut off? Did you put a curse on the entire continent so that he was left alone and died in solitude? Did you commit suicide while experimenting with humans?

It’s all me.

If I do what I want right now, I will feel relieved. But what about the end? Going back to the beginning. Another new episode begins.

I need to see this fucking world again.

Do you want to do that again? no. I absolutely hate it. Even dying is a requirement. If you die, the next episode will start again, so dying is also an option.

So what should I do?

Simple.

It’s about surviving. Rather than using a curse, a force outside the game, to overthrow the board, I am also a piece on chess.

The goal is to survive by becoming thoroughly evil. Let’s eliminate everything that poses a threat, and kill everyone who had a direct or indirect effect on my death.

Let’s go back to the beginning.

Don’t confuse purpose and goal. My ‘purpose’ was to survive, but I never set it as my ‘purpose’ to take revenge on others. Let’s not be mistaken.

I felt like my vision became clearer as my goal, which had been vague and focused on various things, became clear once again.

Until now, I was too concerned about the ‘goal’ of getting revenge on someone and destroying someone, so I moved passively.

Now let’s move a little bigger. Anyway, as long as I have the asymmetrical power called the curse in my hands, there is no problem.

I smiled slightly as I felt the tightness in my chest disappear.

“Hehe.”

good. Now it starts again.

* * *

Apart from finding my original intention, there was nothing I could do right now, so I came to the training ground to find Hermel.

Hermel was swinging his sword as hard as usual, but he was so focused that he didn’t even notice I was there.

Come to think of it, I said I would spar with you last time. I’m in a good mood today, so let’s have a little fun.

-Uh, isn’t that you, Charlotte?

-Why did he come here?

-Aren’t you here to teach someone like last time?

―I want to be like that person… … .

I listened to the outfield conversation with one ear and held the halberd in my hand. I grinned at the familiar weight, put on the safety device, and approached Hermel.

Hermel, who was swinging his sword, opened his eyes and looked towards me, perhaps because he heard what the other students were saying or because he felt me approaching.

“Ah, Charles!”

“I told you last time that I would spar with you. I came to keep my promise.”

“Hmm――You didn’t forget? Since he hasn’t said anything since that day, I was going to wait until next week and then rush in when he thought he’d forgotten.”

“Well, I didn’t forget. I was just putting it off because I was a little tired.”

Hermel smiled, turned to me and relaxed.

“There’s no need to do a separate count, right?”

“Yes. Instead, I’m going to really go all out today. The way you beat your brother.”

“Hey, that sounds fun.”

“Is it okay to say it was cruel after being attacked?”

“I don’t. I have no intention of complaining to someone who is stronger than me in any way.”

Hermel smiled viciously, fastened the safety device on his sword, and took a stance.

This time, unlike last time, I approached Hermel first. A simple strike from top to bottom.

Hermel immediately raised his sword to block my attack, and the metallic sound of iron clashing against iron was heard.

“You say you are sincere, but is this all you want? I’m so disappointed!!”

Hermel, who violently swung his sword and deflected the halberd, lunged forward and swung his sword, and I blocked Hermel’s sword by moving the halberd around.

Kaan–!! Kang–!! Cough!

Every time Hermel’s sword and my halberd made contact, a strong metallic sound struck my ears, and this metallic sound became quieter as time went by.

This was because the power contained in Hermel’s sword became increasingly weaker.

“Hmph!?”

He must have felt it too, as he stopped his next attack and took a long step back.

Hermel made a shocked face when he noticed that his limbs were starting to droop like water-soaked cloth.

“What did you do… … ?”

“It’s a curse. What you learn in Professor Draco’s class.”

He smiled and twirled his halberd. Thanks to Hermel’s power absorbed through the energy drain, he was able to fully use the halberd without cursing his subordinates.

“Curse… … ? Did you use a curse when you defeated Onii-sama? Also, in the middle of the day?”

“That’s right. Oh, this is a secret from other people? I’m telling you because it’s Hermel. Got it?”

“Are you saying this because I am you?”

I stretched out the halberd to the side and slowly approached Hermel.

“Okay then. You’re a friend.”

With a grin, he swung his halberd and stopped it right in front of Hermel’s neck.

Hermel raised his sword to try to block the halberd, but as soon as it hit the halberd, he lost the sword.

He said as he watched the sword rolling around helplessly on the floor.

“Was it a bit rude?”

“That… … . Even though I said I wouldn’t complain… … . huh. It was a little rude.”

“But isn’t it good to know my strength?”

“The walls are so high that it’s difficult, but it’s good. How can I make that curse even a possibility?”

Hermel smiled brightly, showing his teeth, and said that as he hugged me.

I thought he was doing this to be cute, but that wasn’t the case.

Hermel’s limbs were shaking like a newly born fawn.

“So, how long is this going to last? My arms and legs are shaking so I can’t move.”

“Ah.”

Energy drain can be taken away, but it cannot be returned, so it will be like that all day today. Why am I sorry?