The Hope Handed Down by the Me of a Previous World
by Afuhfuihgs
Any more rest felt like an excessive luxury. I carefully slipped out of bed, making sure not to wake Luna, and took out the hit list Bella had given me from my spatial storage. Ross’s last words, endlessly echoing in my head, tightened around my heart.
Being next to Luna felt like missing the opportunity of a lifetime, making me feel impatient. It felt like I needed to kill someone right away to get rid of this impatience.
I found a suitable name on the hit list. He hadn’t committed any crimes yet, but he was someone who would succumb to the Order’s temptation in the future. Only then did I use spatial magic with a satisfied smile to secretly slip out of the Grace family’s mansion.
I plan to kill them all. The person who sides with the Order, their family who knows nothing, even the maids and servants. This wasn’t a resolution or anything. Calling it a resolution would be an exaggeration.
Like casually deciding on a menu at a restaurant, I felt no emotion or thought about committing murder. It didn’t feel strange either. I just clearly felt that it was something I had to do.
The person I’m about to kill isn’t a character in the novel. They’re just an extra that I, the author, didn’t even recognize, filling in the gaps in the world. No, they’re just a dummy. It’s strange to even care about something like that.
Right now, I didn’t feel the impatience that filled my head, the tension about killing, or the anxiety about being caught. I was just moving my feet to kill someone, feeling nothing. Except for Luna, this world, everything… felt endlessly futile.
It was still early morning, but there were people walking around the streets. As I slipped into an alley to avoid being noticed, the space twisted, and the dark alley turned into a cozy and sacred, yet foreign space.
I stopped walking. Not because the space had changed, but because a girl was blocking my path. It was the first time I’d met her. But I knew this girl. A girl with silver hair and blue eyes was rare, and her perfect appearance was comparable to Bella’s, who had one of the best looks in this world.
The girl blocking my path was a character in the novel. And the very person who possessed Ross with Jin Sian’s soul. Not the fake Saintess Medea that the church presented to the public, but the only person directly connected to God.
It was the Saintess.
Like a scene from a painting, the background, atmosphere, and even my mind and gaze were all taken away as if it were natural. The Saintess met my eyes and opened her mouth.
,Hello.”
The question that came to my mind at her beautiful greeting was, why? Why was the Saintess, who should be locked up in the basement under the church’s surveillance, standing in front of me now? The deep emotion and tension in her eyes, and the various other emotions that I couldn’t interpret… Why was the Saintess looking at me with those eyes?
So, I had no choice but to ask.
,Why are you here…?”
At my question, the Saintess tilted her head. I couldn’t help but be momentarily captivated by the silver hair that flowed beautifully over her shoulders.
,The safety device I installed was destroyed… Did you think I wouldn’t come looking for you?”
It seemed the Saintess knew that I had regained my essence as the author. If so, the Saintess must have appeared to punish me for releasing the seal without permission.
As I materialized a shadow spear and prepared to fight, the Saintess shook her head with a faint smile.
,I don’t intend to fight you.”
I was taken aback by the unexpected reaction.
,Then why did you come to find me?”
,To keep the promise I made with you.”
,With me…?”
A promise with me, whom she’s meeting for the first time? As I questioned the incomprehensible words, something came to mind. The Ross of Hope in this world had made a contract with the Saintess.
Perhaps that contract was the promise the Saintess was talking about.
The Saintess took a step towards me. I reflexively took a step back.
,Do you know why I installed the safety device?”
I had once speculated on the reason why the Saintess had to do that. My conclusion back then was probably this.
,Because I might sacrifice people without a second thought for the sake of the ending, and treat the world as just a novel, treating the characters as mere letters… Or is that not it?”
For some reason, it seemed like the Saintess smiled slightly at my answer. It was very brief, but it definitely looked like it.
,That’s right, at some point, you started to recognize this world as just a world in a novel. You killed people without a second thought and felt no emotion.”
The Saintess continued, her voice tinged with a hint of bitterness.
,You, who became a mass murderer, killed 1.03 million innocent citizens living in Ludwig in a single day just to kill the immortal Roman, and you even cooperated with the Order to break down the eastern border just to reach the ending faster.”
What the Saintess said might not be true. But I didn’t think she was lying. Because, like the Saintess said, killing all the living beings in Ludwig to kill the immortal Roman sounded like a good idea.
The Saintess looked straight at me, her eyes filled with determination. It was a transparent gaze that seemed to see right through me.
,Your current state is dangerous. You’re in a precarious state… like you could collapse at any moment.”
Strangely, I had the illusion that the Saintess’s dry voice contained concern for me. So, I wanted to argue back for no reason.
,I’m fine.”
,…Killing someone who hasn’t committed any crime is definitely wrong.”
I let out a hollow laugh at the Saintess’s upright voice.
,Are you saying I’m wrong because I didn’t become the hero you wanted?”
When I asked sarcastically, the Saintess smiled bitterly and quietly shook her head.
,No, you’re wrong. That’s not what I wanted. It was you who wanted to become a hero.”
,What are you….”
,You were the one who yearned for and admired Roel, the protagonist in the novel you created.”
Our gazes tangled in the air. I struggled to part my lips, feeling pressured to answer somehow.
,…That’s not important to me anymore.”
Even I thought it was a poor excuse. The Saintess seemed to have noticed it too, as she sparkled her clear eyes and muttered.
,No, it will become important. That person seems to have read even this. It’s a flow that even I couldn’t read… How did he figure it out? Is it because he knows himself better? “
It was an incomprehensible statement. But soon, my gaze was drawn to something shining brightly in the Saintess’s hand, as if it had captured the sunlight. It appeared in the Saintess’s hand as she waved it in the air, distorting the space.
The Saintess slowly approached me. This time, I didn’t avoid her. No, it would be more accurate to say that I couldn’t move, as if my feet were tied to something in the Saintess’s hand that drove away the darkness and brought warmth.
,That is….”
At my question, the Saintess wore a calm smile.
,It’s a gift from the you of a previous world.”
The Saintess held out what was in her hand to me. I silently looked down at it.
Perhaps this was a trap to imprison my essence as an author again. I shouldn’t rashly reach out my hand. When an unbearable sense of foreboding filled my head with the urge to pull my body back, I heard the Saintess’s soft voice in my ear.
,Hope.”
,…What?”
,This is hope.”
The Saintess held out something called hope in front of me. After staring at the hope for a moment, I carefully reached out my hand.
I felt warmth at my fingertips. And a strange warmth, like drinking warm fishcake soup on a cold winter street, permeated inside me, melting something that had been frozen solid.
,Ah….”
I heard a voice from somewhere.
A voice laughing joyfully, a voice comforting someone in sorrow, the innocent laughter of a child, and the voices of people watching over them and chattering.
The hope that had seeped in from my fingertips and entered inside me resonated loudly like a heart within me.
Someone I’d never met before spoke with trust.
,Ross, you can do it.”
,Captain. We believe in you.”
,I won’t give up.”
Again, someone I’d never met before called me Captain and raised their thumb.
,Let’s all come and play together again next time. Captain! When you save the world!”
,Thank you for protecting our family, Ross.”
,Come on, call me Uncle Ross.”
,Of course. We’re friends.”
Voices I didn’t know called out to me with friendly feelings.
,Ross.” ,Hey.” ,Hey, country bumpkin.” ,You airhead.” ,Junior.” ,Captain!”
Countless memories flashed through my mind. In those memories, there were people I didn’t know and people I had seen sometime.
The memories and voices were fading away. No, they were staying in place, and I was moving away.
Finally, a familiar and affectionate voice echoed within me.
,Ross, if you ever feel like you’re lost… look at the acorn I’ve carved here. It will help you remember what kind of person Ross is and what path you should take.”
The memories that had flashed through my mind disappeared, and the voices that had echoed within me also disappeared.
Everything became quiet, and only darkness remained. Only then did I realize that I had been closing my eyes.
I opened my eyes. And I realized that the color and texture with which I looked at the world had completely changed.
This world is not simply a world where the novel I wrote has become reality. It’s a world where people who don’t appear in the novel become my friends, colleagues, and lovers.
In places I didn’t know, there was sadness, laughter, happiness, and love.
With the hope that Ross of Hope had handed down, I was barely able to recall what I had forgotten.
What I had affection for was not just the characters in the novel, but the world itself that had become the setting for the novel.
The relationships that countless Rosses had built up prove it. The relationships I will build in the future and the relationships that have already passed all give meaning to this world.
The twisted space disappeared. The dark alley reappeared. And I was able to hear things that I hadn’t been aware of until now.
The busy footsteps of the head of the household going to work early in the morning for his family, the hand covering the child tossing and turning in bed and patting their chest, the busyness of people trying to greet the morning.
Now that I was aware of what I hadn’t been aware of, I could finally understand.
It was a world I had dreamed of and created, but this world was a world where everyone lived together.
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