Saki Ayase – April 12 (Tuesday)

● April

12

Tuesday Ayase Saki

I glare at the ginger ale placed in front of me.

It’s a welcome party for new students. While I’m glad I decided to join, I’m at a loss about how to interact from here. Honestly, I’m just not cut out for this kind of thing.

On the long wooden table at the izakaya, plates piled high with all-you-can-eat and all-you-can-drink orders are lined up. For the new students who can’t drink alcohol, there’s a pitcher of oolong tea for every four people. Perhaps because most of the girls here just graduated high school, there are plenty of drinks like orange juice and ginger ale aside from oolong tea. The girls who are already over twenty are starting with beer and quickly moving on to cocktails and sours. But I’m still nursing my ginger ale.

When I look up, I see the two empty seats in front of me.

Since the beginning, I’ve had no one to talk to. I didn’t want to be surrounded by strangers, so I quietly sat at a corner table, but maybe I was too quiet because the two seats in front of me remain empty, and the girl to my left has been engrossed in a lively conversation about the latest hit songs with the girl sitting right next to her. Not wanting to interrupt, I’ve settled into my corner, sipping my ginger ale slowly.

Once I finish this drink, I’ll have to order something new. The ordering tablet has gone over to the other side of the table, and I can’t get it unless I ask someone, but to do that, I’d have to raise my voice, and the thought of drawing attention makes me anxious about how to behave.

…What’s wrong with me? Was I always this kind of person?

I ponder this for a while. Where does this cowardice come from?

And then I realize. It’s because I have expectations──.

I’m a bit shocked. I had intended not to expect anything from anyone. So, I didn’t mind if no one expected anything from me. But somewhere along the line, that changed.

There are indeed people in the world whom it’s okay to expect things from. There may not be many who will return goodwill when you show it, but the possibility of meeting one is not zero. Once I realized that, my world became more complicated.

It used to be simpler. I thought that as long as I produced results, the world would be quiet. And to produce results, all I needed was effort, not friends.

Just as I was thinking that.

“Whoa, sorry I’m late!”

A cheerful voice interrupts, and two new students appear.

“Sorry, sorry! Oh, everyone’s already started!”

The girl in front waves her hand in front of her face as she approaches the empty seat in front of me. The girl closely following her pokes her friend’s side with her finger while smiling apologetically.

“Isn’t ‘sorry’ a bit old-fashioned? Are you actually from the Showa era or something?”

They seem to be friends, chatting casually as they come right up to me.

“No, it’s still a normal thing to say. My whole family says it!”

“So, everyone’s from the Showa era, huh?”

“Oh? Are we fighting? I’ll pay in full, though?”

She swings her fists back and forth like a boxer, but no matter how you look at it, she seems like a total brat. Just a kid.

“Hey, Kyouka! Can you squeeze in a bit more? I can’t sit down like this!”

Poked in the back, the girl leading the way sits down right in front of me. The girl who came with her sits next to her.

The girl sitting directly across from me has orange ash-colored hair.

“Ah…”

“Hmm?”

The girl with orange ash hair—Kyouka, as she introduces herself—looks up in response to my involuntary voice. Our eyes meet.

“Oh, you’re the McDonald’s girl!”

Huh? That’s how you remember me?

“Um, yeah. I’m not Ayase, I’m Asamura Saki.”

“Saki-chan, huh? I’m Kyouka. You can call me Kyouka, written with the characters for ‘mirror’ and ‘flower.’ Mizukami Kyouka. Feel free to call me by my first name.”

She says this with a bright smile. It’s a smile that seems genuine, and it warms my heart.

The girl sitting next to Kyouka chimes in.

“You’re the McDonald’s girl! That’s great, Kyouka’s been wanting to meet you!”

Not just a memory, but a nickname now.

“Hey, Mayu! Didn’t I tell you not to say that? Ah, sorry. I got so excited back then. I thought since you’re a new student, we’d meet again soon, but I was wondering why we hadn’t until now.”

“Are you happy?”

“This girl has been calling Asamura-san her ‘gal master’ all on her own.”

“Hey, hey, Mayu! We promised not to say that!”

…What’s with this ‘gal master’ thing?

“Um, what does that mean?”

Kyouka turns her attention back to me from the girl she called ‘Mayu.’ She raises her thumb and thrusts her fist toward me.

“Ehehe. Yay!”

“…Yay?”

I hesitantly thrust my fist forward, thumb raised. Kyouka bumps her fist against mine. What kind of culture is this? I’ve never experienced anything like it. Is this what they call a culture clash?

“Saki-chan’s blonde hair is beautiful, isn’t it?”

“Ah… thank you?”

“Why the question mark?”

“Because I’ve never been told that before.”

“No way!”

It’s true.

At Suisei High School, there were very few girls who dyed their hair as clearly as I did, and while there were quite a few who groomed their eyebrows or styled their hair in ways that would fall out by the end of the day, I had no connection with those who engaged in such hidden fashion.

I had built up my appearance as much as possible according to my own sensibilities. But looking back, I realize I’ve never had the experience of someone simply saying “you’re beautiful” to me…

“Not really, I guess.”

Maybe Maiya or Ryochin, Sato Ryouko, had said something like that. But that’s about it. I don’t recall anyone being so straightforward with me upon first meeting. Suddenly, I feel nostalgic as I remember my high school friends.

Over there was home. This izakaya feels like away.

“No, no, no. You’re totally cool! From any angle, you’re a proper gal!”

I never thought I’d hear the word ‘proper’ used to describe a gal.

“Really?”

“Yeah! Beautiful blonde hair, earrings that occasionally catch the light, and your lips are not overly flashy but have a high moisture level that makes you want to kiss them—”

Kiss—. I suddenly thought that was an expression I wouldn’t expect to hear from another girl, and I felt a bit flustered. I had never evaluated my outfit from that perspective.

“And then, with a one-shoulder top that’s quite revealing, and a delicate chain necklace falling right at your chest, your gaze is perfectly guided! It’s amazing! The ring on your wrist is like a delicate silver hoop made by fairies. Your nails are painted a lovely ocean blue, and you’re a gal who wouldn’t be embarrassed to show up anywhere! And yet, there’s a sense of elegance, a root of intelligence. That’s the modern gal, a bit different from the past.

Saki-chan, you’re perfect!”

I never expected such literary expressions to be used to describe my outfit. Is this what Tsukinomiya Women’s University is like…?

But honestly, being described like that makes me wonder how well I’m armed for this.

“…Thank you.”

From my perspective, it’s still a season where the cold lingers, yet Kyouka is boldly showing off her shoulders.

“It seems like Asamura-san’s fashion made quite an impact, and she’s been saying she wanted to get to know you for a while now.”

With a smile that suits the word ‘alluring,’ Kyouka’s friend says this, and Kyouka blushes.

“So, you don’t have to hide your feelings. I mean, aren’t you usually more straightforward?”

I do feel that way. I remember being told right off the bat, “You’re different,” when I first met someone. When people around me used that phrase, they always seemed to say it from a bit of a distance. That girl is different. Well, I cut ties with those kinds of people.

In contrast, Kyouka’s “You’re different” felt like a simple observation of what she thought.

“Did you want to get to know me…?”

“Because I’ve never been told I’m cool before!”

“Kyouka is often called ‘sexy cute,’ right?”

“Exactly! That’s why I got so happy! Plus, the person saying it was even cooler than me!”

“Oh wow, you’re really smitten!”

“Hey, Saki-chan…”

She shifts her gaze from her friend back to me.

“Let’s be friends? Let’s!”

“Uh…”

I look at Kyouka again.

I thought this when we first met, but I think her fashion is cool. That impression hasn’t changed today.

Her long orange ash hair, loosely curled at the ends, with some strands hanging in front of her body. Her earrings are slightly larger, golden crescent shapes. The asymmetry in their sizes is interesting. As I mentioned earlier, her top is a lively off-shoulder that boldly exposes her tanned shoulders. The high-waisted part of her outfit is cinched with a thin belt. To me, this is “cool.”

“Friends, as in with me?”

“You’re saying it right in front of me. Yes, that’s right.”

I need to confirm since it’s not a phrase I’m used to hearing. But still, I think this is a good opportunity. In college, encounters are more limited than in high school.

“If you don’t mind me…”

“Yay!”

“Good for you, Kyouka!”

Her friend says in a relaxed, gentle tone.

“What are you talking about? A friend of a friend is a friend! Saki-chan, this is Mayu. Come on, introduce yourself!”

“I’m Kaneko Mayu. Just call me Mayu, and you can call Asamura-san and Saki however you like!”

“Oh, sure. Feel free to call me however you want.”

Now I look properly at Mayu.

My first impression remains that she’s fluffy and gentle.

She doesn’t seem like she’s the same age as me. She has a slightly mature vibe, her way of speaking is calm, and her alto voice is pleasant to the ear. I can imagine someone falling for her just from her voice. She’s wearing a light blue cardigan (which she’s currently folded and placed behind her), and compared to Kyouka, she’s showing less skin. But once she takes off her outerwear, I notice the size of her chest pushing up against her blouse.

“Um… yes. Nice to meet you, Mayu.”

“Mayu met Saki-chan on the same day, and we just clicked!”

When I understood the casually spoken words, a strange sound escaped from my throat.

“Huh? Um… you two aren’t long-time friends, then?”

“Eh? That’s impossible! I just came to Tokyo from Fukuoka this spring. Mayu’s from here, so there’s no way we could be old acquaintances. Come on!”

Even if you say that, how was I supposed to know? Still, it’s surprising that after meeting on the course registration day, we’ve already developed this kind of closeness.

“So… that’s how it is.”

“Mayu’s an otaku, but we get along well.”

“Eh, I’m just a fanatic, not an otaku!”

I don’t quite understand the difference.

Still, both of them seem like nice people, and having been freed from my corner, I started talking about various things regarding college life.

That was fine until the conversation began to flow in a slightly strange direction when Kyouka suddenly asked, “Do you have a boyfriend?” in the middle of our meal.

“Eh?”

“Boyfriend, I mean. Or a daddy. Basically, I’m asking if you have a sexual partner.”

I’m a bit confused.

Of course, I know that when girls gather, they often start talking about love. Especially Ryochin loved it. Her eyes would sparkle differently. But somehow, I’ve never been approached in such a direct manner.

“Kyouka, that’s out of line. The sexual partner could be a girlfriend or a mommy, you know? That’s not considerate.”

“Annoying! But well, okay!”

What’s okay? What’s going on?

“Um…”

“Oh. Sorry.”

She suddenly apologizes. I realized that this wasn’t a conversation to have with someone I just met a moment ago—at least, I thought she would.

“If you’re going to ask someone else, you should start with yourself! That wasn’t fair!”

“That’s true. Kyouka, you should reflect on that.”

“Yeah, sorry, sorry. You see, I’ve been single for about three months. I wanted to find a boyfriend since I came here, but even after having sex, it never led to a relationship.”

“Huh?”

Isn’t that the wrong order?

“I wonder if I made a mistake leaving Yuta back in Fukuoka. But I can’t ask a promising young man to chase after me. It’s nice to have a younger guy who’s earnest, even if he’s not skilled. Yuta was cute.”

I felt a jolt at the name Yuta. No, no, that Yuta isn’t Yuuta.

“I see. Saki-chan doesn’t have a preference for younger guys.”

That’s not what I meant.

Next, Mayu begins to speak gently.

“I find it easier to rely on older guys who have more experience. Even though there are older people who are still immature. I’ve heard that it’s easier when the other person has more experience, whether they’re male or female. If they’re older, they can buy condoms without being embarrassed.”

“Now that you mention it, I used to buy them when I was over there. If I didn’t say anything, he’d try to rush into things right away. It was tough to teach him to wait. Since he finally learned, it felt like a waste to let him go. But I really wanted to get into the entertainment industry. I thought, ‘If that’s the case, I should go to Tokyo.’”

She seems to start worrying about something on her own.

However, from what I’m hearing, it seems these two have had experiences during high school.

I didn’t have anyone like that among my friends, like Maiya.

I never saw anyone like that at Suisei High. Today is April 12th. It’s not even been two weeks since we became college students. And yet, I’ve suddenly met two exceptions.

Could it be… could it be that there were actually many kids with this level of experience in high school, but everyone just kept it hidden?

“So, do you have a boyfriend?”

“Yeah.”

“I knew it! I thought so! See, Mayu, I told you!”

Kyouka says this with a proud look on her face.

Today

Next to Hanaka-san, Mayu-san murmured softly, “Having a boyfriend and having a sexual partner are two different things, you know…” My heart jolted. Mayu-san looked at me, a hint of a mysterious smile on her lips… or so it seemed? It didn’t seem like Kyouka-san, who was getting all excited, noticed.

“As expected of you, Gal Master!”

“Please stop calling me that.”

“Gal Boss?”

Even worse.

I shook my head vigorously. If I agreed here, I would definitely be called Gal Boss for the next four years.

After that, I found myself unable to correct Kyouka-san, who mistakenly thought I was an experienced comrade, and ended up going along with the conversation. What a mistake. I should have honestly confessed that I was inexperienced. I should have done so, even if it meant giving up the title of Gal Master. In fact, I never wanted that title in the first place.

And yet, despite being inexperienced, I spent two exhausting hours listening to the “experiences” of two friends I had just met, as if we were strangers.

By the time I returned home, mentally drained, I thought I would just go to bed quickly. As I stepped into the hallway by the entrance, I heard the voice of Asamura-kun saying, “I’m home.”

I was so surprised I felt like my heart might leap out of my chest. What an overreaction.

“Wow, I’m surprised. We were almost together the whole time, huh?”

“Welcome back. Um… Saki.”

Before I could say “welcome back,” he beat me to it, and I hurriedly replied.

“Oh, I’m home—”

Just as I was about to say my name, Kyouka-san’s earlier words flashed in my mind: “You know, it’s nice to have a younger guy who’s not very skilled but tries hard. Yuta was so cute.” No, no, that Yuta is not Yuuta.

“Yuuta, big brother.”

Right, this Yuuta is Asamura-kun, my big brother. Thanks to the hasty addition of “big brother,” I managed to calm my racing heart. No, no, this Yuuta is the one who hasn’t experienced anything. He’s not younger than me. Well, it’s only been a week, but he’s older.

I never thought I would have to rely on the position of a big brother for just a week, which I had called unfair.

I retreated to my room as if to escape.

Eighteen is the time to begin preparing for adulthood.

Becoming an adult meant that “those kinds of things” were drawing closer.