Ruchellini (6)

The extreme depression was accompanied by a slight feeling of lethargy. My body felt weak and trembled. I closed my eyes on the bed, holding my breath as if I were dead. It wasn’t a panic attack. No. I’d rather have a panic attack. I wish I could just collapse without even having time to sort out my thoughts. I hated how calm my head became every time I took a breath.

Why. Why did I say that? I could have said it later. Shuriel’s words were right; the timing was bad. It was too early to tell. I should have said it after securing proper status. I was naive. I was a commoner, and he was the heir of a Count’s family. Why couldn’t I think about that vast difference?

Come to think of it, it was something that could be easily resolved without having to whine like this. Difference in status? With my abilities, I could easily obtain a noble title, at the very least a baronetcy. Who would stand in my way, being one of the five Archmages in all of history? It’s even possible to overturn the empire and take the throne. And even if it’s not through combat, one magic thesis would guarantee preferential treatment from all the magic towers.

But. Once the emotions surged, it was impossible to stop. The thought of being rejected by Shuriel caused all sorts of negative emotions to consume my mind. It’s not just me who’s being abandoned. The image of a child asking me who my father is flickers before my eyes. In that illusion, I couldn’t answer the child’s question.

“Haa… Haa…”

I cover my forehead and forcibly calm my trembling body. Should I self-harm? Maybe that would calm me down a bit. No. What if the child gets hurt if I mess up? It’s different from the past when I could cut my body as much as I wanted. I have something to protect now. The accumulating anxiety couldn’t escape and gnawed away at my body little by little.

-Knock knock.

While sinking like a shipwrecked boat in the sea of emotions, I heard a knock. I just let my arm fall and opened my eyes. The lamp on the ceiling was as bright as its fancy decoration. The strong light that was hard to look at came down in a straight line and illuminated my eyes. I answered the knock while still lying on the bed.

“Come in.”

“Do you like the room?”

“…Kalberd.”

The owner of the voice beyond the door was Kalberd.

-Kkiiik.

The door opened, and the white-haired old man showed his face. He was wearing full light armor despite being inside the mansion, and even brought the greatsword he used in the labyrinth. He looked the same as before getting out of the carriage. The silver-decorated scabbard shone brightly. It was too rude of an attire to ‘treat’ a ‘guest,’ but unfortunately, I wasn’t a guest. I’m a witness.

Moreover, Kalberd regarded me as a target of vigilance. The chief commander of the rescue team who had failed several times was none other than Kalberd himself, so he knew the dangers of the labyrinth better than anyone else. Even with an Astra, it’s nearly impossible for an F-rank adventurer to survive to the top of the labyrinth. He must think I’m hiding my strength. That’s right. I’m hiding my strength. The reason Kalberd can’t touch me is because of Shuriel, not because I’m innocent.

“…There are no problems with the room.”

“Hehe. I was worried because it was a room that hadn’t been used for a while, but it was a needless worry.”

“So, why did you come?”

“You’ve become prickly in the short time I haven’t seen you.”

“…I apologize for my rudeness.”

“It’s fine. More importantly, get up.”

If anything, it would be rude to answer without even getting out of bed.

Kalberd was pathologically obsessed with the safety of his master. He lightly overlooked rudeness towards himself, but if that rudeness was directed at his master, he would draw his sword without hesitation. However, there was only one time he turned away from his master. It was when Shuriel, who was corrupted by Mana, threatened him with Kalberd’s daughter. The monthly treatment costs must have been enormous.

Haa. So what if it was. Ignoring the throbbing head, I got out of bed. My hair, which had become disheveled from lying down for only a short time, covered my eyes. I frowned and tidied my hair. It was slow because I only had one arm. Kalberd’s gaze was fixed on me as he looked at me with a slightly pathetic expression.

“Sorry to interrupt your rest, but it’s almost time for dinner. Get ready.”

“…Doryeon-nim said it wouldn’t be ready for another two hours.”

I got out of bed and sent him a suspicious look. I look at the clock. Only 30 minutes have passed. Kalberd let out a faint sigh and laughed.

“Are you going to go in that state?”

“…I’ve maintained cleanliness, in my own way.”

Thanks to the existence of Clean magic, I’m always in a clean state. Not just the outside, but the inside too. I burn the waste inside, so I don’t even need to go to the bathroom. Incontinence during play… um. That’s a slightly different story. I won’t bother explaining it. Anyway, I was in a neat state without a speck of dirt. However, Kalberd’s point wasn’t about cleanliness, but etiquette.

“Don’t even think about setting foot at the table with that ridiculous etiquette. The master might let it slide, but Gong-kke won’t.”

“….”

“There’s a limit to learning noble etiquette just by reading books. I’ll teach you one by one, so come quickly.”

Is that all you called me for? I almost said that, but I endured it with superhuman patience. Kalberd turned his back without saying anything, even after seeing my displeased face. Damn it. I’m annoyed, but I have to follow.

“Good. Lower your arm a little more.”

“….”

“No. Hold your head up.”

“Haa….”

The noble’s dining etiquette that I learned semi-forcibly was surprisingly simple. Posture was easy to learn, so it wasn’t very difficult. Things like cutting meat without making noise, making eye contact, and moving your arms were really trivial things. I spent time with Kalberd like that until dinner time approached.

“Excellent. I didn’t expect you to digest all the etiquette in just an hour….”

“…You flatter me.”

“No, I’m serious. Where else would you find someone cutting meat with one arm? Using Mana to fix the meat instead of a fork. Even a decent magician would have a hard time doing that.”

Now he’s openly asking if I’m hiding my strength. I just sighed heavily at his blatant praise. Still, I’ll let it slide because he taught me diligently. I learned something, after all. I’m not that shameless.

-Ttang.

At that time. A bell rang. A maid approached us.

“Kalberd-nim. Dinner is ready.”

The end of preparation.

Kalberd nodded roughly and said to me.

“Now go. My role ends here.”

“Aren’t you going, Gyeong-kke?”

“This is a treat for you, not me. You don’t need me to explain the location, do you?”

I nod.

His smile as he laughed was somewhat artificial.

* * *

The ‘treat’ that Shuriel mentioned was so luxurious that it could be called a royal banquet, as if to show the power of Lushelliny. It wasn’t a real royal banquet, but just the limit of what I could express. I turn my eyes to the table. The unknown dishes were piled high on the table, making me swallow hard just by looking at them. The murderously delicious smell stabs my nose. The well-prepared food soothed my depressed mood just by its existence.

However, the two who invited me were nowhere to be seen. It was very awkward to be sitting alone at a large table. Thanks to that, I was the only one suffering. To have these foods in front of me and not be able to move a finger. My mouth watered involuntarily.

-Ttokak.

As I was just swallowing my saliva. I heard footsteps. Flowing blonde hair. A height that I had to look up to. It was Shuriel.

“Doryeon, …nim.”

“Yujin.”

I barely managed to turn away my brightening face. It had only been a few hours since we were apart, but I was as happy as if I had met someone after a long time. Even though I resented him, I couldn’t hate him because I thought of him as the child’s father. I’m like this. There’s no way Shuriel wouldn’t have noticed this series of changes in my expression. He came up to me and said in a very small voice, simply.

“Tonight. To my office.”

“….”

Night. Office. Does he have something to say? It might not be something to say with words. My face flushed at Shuriel’s double meaning, and I nodded. No, what are you thinking? Double meaning or whatever, he’s probably just trying to discuss countermeasures normally. As I was letting my imagination run wild on my own, another set of footsteps followed. Shuriel quickly moved away and sat down in his seat.

“Sorry I’m late. To call a guest and make them wait in front of the food. There’s no greater discourtesy.”

Hairak Lushelliny. If Shuriel was the quintessential blonde nobleman, Hairak was platinum blonde with a slightly white hue. It wasn’t our first meeting, so we didn’t need to exchange grand greetings. He turned his eyes to my empty arm. I bowed my head and said.

“…I apologize in advance for any rudeness I may show due to my lack of an arm.”

“It’s good that you know your place.”

Hairak was someone who had doubled Shuriel’s ‘nobility.’ He was born a noble and hadn’t changed. His contempt for adventurers and his condescending behavior towards inferiors were ingrained in him. ‘It’s good that you know your place.’ What he just said might sound like sarcasm or ridicule at first glance, but it would be ‘natural’ for Hairak.

However. The only one who could stand up to him was next to me.

“It’s not Yujin’s fault that his arm is gone.”

Shuriel.

He was angry on my behalf.

“Then would you feel better if I said it was your fault? I don’t even feel motivated to defend you when you can’t understand even when I do.”

“What’s wrong with a guy who just sits and reads documents day and night?”

“Watch your mouth. You came back with a mouth like a sewer after going outside. I’ll have to say something to Kalberd.”

“Eugeuk….”

“Enough. How can you show such a disgraceful appearance in front of a commoner?”

Shuriel gritted his teeth and grabbed a fork. Then, he completely ignored the etiquette and stabbed it in, taking a large bite. Hairak’s brow furrowed. It seemed like some kind of revenge. I had to desperately stop the corners of my mouth from rising at that petty revenge. Idiot. But thank you.

“Yes. Your name is Yujin, you said.”

Hairak turned the conversation to me without even picking up a fork.

“Yes. I’m an adventurer, F-rank.”

“You and Shuriel broke through a tower that even Kalberd, a high-ranking Aura Knight, failed to conquer three times? An F-rank magician?”

“….”

“Reveal your identity.”

His first words were an interrogation. He was too direct, even for being direct. Thanks to that, the hand that was holding the fork returned to its place.

“…I haven’t been working as an adventurer for long, so my rank is low.”

“Are you affiliated with a magic tower?”

“No, I’m not.”

After that, I continued a question-and-answer session that was close to coercion for 12 minutes. Hairak’s tone was harsh, but there was no hostility. Perhaps that’s why. Shuriel didn’t stop him, even though he was dissatisfied.

“I have a lot more to ask you, but I’ll stop here since I’m leaving for the Holy See soon. The food is getting cold. Eat quickly.”

“Thank… you.”

“Ah. Before that. One last thing.”

“…Yes?”

“What is your relationship with Shuriel?”

“….”

My face hardens. I changed the subject so smoothly that I couldn’t react properly and lost my poker face for a fleeting moment. It was a blunder. The corners of Hairak’s mouth rise.

“Did you sleep together?”

This time, my brain froze. I couldn’t answer Hairak’s direct way of speaking and just opened and closed my mouth. He smiled and turned his eyes to Shuriel.

“I wondered how you survived the tower, so that’s what it was.”

“You… if you run that mouth of yours one more time….”

“Is it true? I just tested you, but how pathetic. Tsk. No matter how much you run around outside because of the Astra’s work, there’s a limit. What would Father think if he knew you were messing around with a commoner?”

Shuriel couldn’t say anything and his face was just red, which strangely made me uncomfortable. Again. Because I’m a commoner. He’s being insulted. At the same time, just like he was angry for me, I also felt that I should be angry for him. I put the fork on the table with a clatter.

“Lord Lushelliny. Do you know how the West lives?”

It was rude and discourteous. But it was perfect for gathering attention. Hairak’s eyes turn this way.

“The West is a place where people are too busy trying to make a living to satisfy the present by borrowing from the future. It’s a place where people would stab their own flesh and blood in the neck for just five copper coins, let alone one silver coin. Since the only place I’ve lived is such a barbaric place, it’s only natural that I don’t know the circumstances of the nobles. But Lord Lushelliny, there’s only one thing I learned in that place.”

Hairak was silent. He maintained his silence as if to say, ‘Go ahead and say it.’ I didn’t cower at that gaze and continued to speak.

“It’s knowing my place. I know my place. Would I act like I’m something special just because I spent one night with the Lushelliny’s Astra? The Astra taking me was nothing more and nothing less than a snack. So Lord Lushelliny, the thing you’re worried about won’t happen. If. If you order me to, I’ll cut open my stomach in this very spot. I’m just a lowly commoner. How could I refuse?”

After finishing my words, I smiled brightly and picked up the fork again. I put the meat dish, which had cooled down and lost its smell, on my plate. It was delicious.

“Ha.”

A dazed laugh echoed across the table.