Phantom Thief’s Arch-Nemesis, Detective Holmes!! (1)

….Clink─

“Here you go.”

The sun rose, and it was nine o’clock.

After leaving Ciel’s laboratory, I arrived at the tax office and submitted the Magic Cylinder I had brought from Guld’s Prison to the employee.

“Lee Seri-nim’s Human Rights Fee payment has been confirmed. Please wait a moment while we measure the exact mana concentration.”

It’s obviously top-grade.

It was an item from the purple bald man’s safe, and he had sneered at me, saying it was magical power extracted from a Magical Girl from another planet, so it would definitely be different from an ordinary person’s magical power.

Ciel also guaranteed it… She said one bottle would be enough to pay it off, but just in case, I brought one more.

The tax office employee opened the lid of the cylinder I handed them, dropped a single drop into a portable magic observation device, and a blue light flashed, indicating top-grade quality.

“All unpaid amounts due to settlement errors have been paid. Lee Seri-nim’s next payment deadline is 365 days from now. This day, one year later.”

“…What? It’s not an error?”

Ding-dong-

“Next please~.”

As if telling me to leave now that my business was done, the employee took their eyes off me and pressed the bell to call the next person.

The amount of money I was unfairly charged was already substantial. The thought of having to pay again in a few days hit me like a blow to the head, leaving me feeling dazed.

“No! No, wait a minute! Why are you just accepting this?! Aren’t you curious where this came from? Didn’t the Prison get attacked yesterday?”

“Ah… that did happen. But I’m not interested. If you’re done, please leave.”

The Magical Girl who attacked a monster, not a Rogue, to save me. As soon as morning came, news outlets, YouTube… everywhere was covering the story.

I was also part of the hot topic, with headlines like, [Girls broke the rules to save the Phantom Thief. Are Lupin and the Magical Girls allies?]

Fortunately, it seemed Guld was the only one who knew my identity. When the unconscious Guld was interviewed, he didn’t mention my identity at all. Thanks to the magic Hyun-ah cast, he seemed to have forgotten he was attacked.

[Just like every night, I was hiding in the safe wearing my armor, but when I came to and opened my eyes, I was naked in the Punishment Room!]

[I don’t remember anything, but I was so happy that Lupin had visited! Hey, Lupin! I don’t know what trick you used, but next time I won’t be so easy! I’ll take you and the Magical Girls down in one fell swoop!! Na-hahahahahaha!!]

“Haa…”

To think I was raped by a bastard like that… It’s a relief I wasn’t fertilized thanks to the Blessing of Contraception… but more importantly, I didn’t have any ova.

Does that mean I’ll have periods later? The monster’s sperm clashing against my ova… Ugh… that might be a bit scary.

“As you can see, Guld-nim has that kind of attitude. He told us to stay put until the Seven Stars Council meets, even if someone comes with a Magic Cylinder stolen by Lupin and the Magical Girls.”

“Why are you just letting them go? Lupin has been active for years. If you convert the stolen items into money, it would easily exceed hundreds of millions.”

“Haa… I’m just an employee. If the higher-ups tell me to do something, I do it. Why would I need to investigate every single thing?”

The employee sipped coffee from a mug, then set the cup down with a thud, looking at me with annoyance.

“Fine. I’m going. If you guys aren’t interested, it’s easier for me.”

Leaving the tax office, the events at Ciel’s Workshop came to mind as I walked back to the cafe.

It was an unbelievable proposition…

‘To defeat Klaus, will you become our Phantom Thief?’

A proposal to wield a sword of counterattack against the invading monsters, on the condition that the equipment used in the laboratory would be provided and repaired.

Of course, not only the Magical Girls and I, but also civilians from the outskirts of the city had already been recruited… Hyun-ah had placed restrictions to prevent the plan from leaking.

Honestly, it’s impossible. After all, the opponents are monsters who have colonized nine planets, including Earth. It’s unknown how many aircraft carriers similar to the battlecruisers witnessed during the invasion there are.

Even if Ciel’s technology is on par with Klaus’s, even if the Magical Girls and I are capable, it’s uncertain if civilians who have barely fired a gun a few times can fight properly.

Most of them would be from a generation that has directly experienced their military might. Even if they made up their minds, the probability of failure in actual combat is high… No matter if they’re Miwol’s comrades, refusing is the best option.

If I get caught, I’ll be raped like with Guld, and if the progression of the 『Mutation Constitution』 obtained through the 『Brand of the Devil』 increases…

“I should have refused… You idiot, Lee Seri…”

Even as I grumbled, looking at the black bracelet on my right wrist, it was already after I had accepted the proposal and left the Workshop.

I couldn’t help it… if the Magical Girls are fighting, it means Miwol will be fighting too.

Even if she’s strong… even if Miwol is incomparably stronger than me… I can’t just stand by and watch the girl I like fight.

‘Lupin, what you need to do is continue to procure Human Rights Fees so civilians can endure, and support us in our operations.’

In summary, it was fundraising, supporting the subjugation of Rogues, and…

[The Seven Stars Council has changed the treatment of Magical Girls. From this moment on, Magical Girls are designated as non-harmless enemies. We promise immense support to Klaus and humans who capture or assist them.]

The Magical Girl hunt had officially begun… While some welcomed the exemption of Human Rights Fees among the support items, those who had been helped by them did not have a good opinion.

Of course, that’s understandable… I was saved twice, so how could I stab the person who saved me?

Anyway, among the support Ciel mentioned was preventing unexpected ambushes during future battles with Rogues.

That’s probably why they gave me a gun that can fire imagined bullets with magic instead of a wire gun… because there will be many times when I’ll have to choose to fight instead of flee.

…Alright. I’ll try it. How can I go back on my word?

A real man’s trait: no regrets… though I’m a little nervous.

『Blessing of Eternity is activated.』

『3 days until semen requirement is unmet.』

…Shit.

Every time I hear the announcement in my head, I instinctively rub my lower abdomen.

The Brand of the Devil. I asked Ciel to remove it, but the answer was impossible, just like when I first met the six girls.

‘On the surface, it looks like it’s stamped on bare skin, but I can’t tell how deep the brand is. Be as careful as possible. I’ve never seen a 『Mutation Constitution』 before.’

Even Ciel, who called herself quite a veteran Magical Girl, was amazed, saying it was a skill she had never seen before…

Other skills, like 『Sensitive Nipples』 or 『Honeypot of Mana』, don’t activate without contact with others, but the problem was 『Blessing of Eternity』, which had a death countdown.

To have a man’s semen put into my body again. I’d rather go into estrus and masturbate. How bad can estrus be? I never want to put a man’s dick inside me again.

…..

Thump─

“Haa… why am I so glad to see it…”

As I arrived home, firm in my resolve, I felt a strange sense of longing, as if I hadn’t seen it in a long time. Though it had only been a few hours.

Not only did I miraculously return from the brink of slavery, but the Magical Girl who saved me was also my junior at work. Could there be another lucky person like me in the world?

“Anyway, I’m screwed…”

The thought that came to mind while cleaning the store alone spilled out unfiltered.

Cafe Lapin had been closed to repair damaged equipment for infiltrating the Prison after receiving the Human Rights Fee notification. Even though it was a cafe in front of the station, closing for several days would have a significant impact on sales.

To make up for what I lost, I should first add Miwol’s suggested smile for about a thousand won… and sell Americanos at half price for a few days.

The problem is fruit… even after the invasion, the damn prices are skyrocketing as if they’ll pierce the sky. If the price is high, people won’t order that menu item at all…

“All small business owners are dying, you monster bastards!!!”

Should I change my business model instead?

Most humans, excluding those in the food service and creative industries, were expelled to the city outskirts. The occupations of monsters and people living in the city center were almost identical.

Aside from institution employees run by Klaus, orphanage directors, or librarians, most were in creative fields like animators and illustrators, and merchants.

…It might be possible.

I could reopen tomorrow, but since customers have already been taken by other cafes, we need our own unique charm to draw them back.

[…This is the idea. What do you think?]

I sent a message, carefully excluding anything a girl might find off-putting from my ideas so far, but there was no reply from Miwol, who usually responded immediately.

Is it too early in the morning…? Ah.

“She said she was on patrol at dawn…”

She must be sleeping after finishing her patrol to see if there were any 『Rogues』 around the city… She goes through a lot of trouble where no one sees her… the Magical Girl.

Ka-talk─

[I like it♥]

“…A heart?”

What’s gotten into her, using a heart when she usually only uses exclamation marks… Anyway, since Miwol said she’d do it, should I just order my outfit first…?

Ding-!

“…Should I cancel it?”

Miwol was already popular enough for male monsters to hit on her, and my current face is nothing to scoff at compared to Miwol’s.

It’ll definitely be a hit. Even if there’s no place to cook, there’s certainly an oven to bake pastries.

[Order complete-☆Gorgeous Frilly Maid Outfit☆ With this, you too can be a traditional maid, not a battle maid for your master!]

Away with the plain white shirt and brown apron! Now is the era of maids for cafes!… Was I swayed by such an advertisement?

Halo, I tried to make the most of the alluring body that bitch changed, but… regret washes over me. Is it right for a man to wear something like this…?

“My thighs… should be fine.”

The skirt is quite short, but it won’t turn me into an 『Exhibitionist』 to this extent. Even if I’d die before wearing it… what wouldn’t I do for money?

A store, by its very nature, must have its own unique character to survive!

Even though there’s a year left until the Human Rights Fee payment period, time flies quickly. Even though I’ve joined the Klaus rebellion, I still need to make a living until the operation begins…

Even if I received equipment from Ciel, security will be tightened given the change in laws, so I should refrain from acting as a Phantom Thief for a while and focus on my main job…

“Fighting, Cafe Lapin, Aja Aja~!!”

Creak─

“…Hm?”

The front door moved, and with the jingle of a bell, a tall man entered.

He looked like a sturdy man, but the mask covering his face made it impossible to tell if he was human or monster.

A long coat that a gentleman might wear, and a pipe held in the mouth-hole of his mask. Seeing no smoke, he seemed to just be holding it.

“…Is it not open yet?”

“I apologize. We plan to reopen tomorrow.”

“I see… I’ll come back tomorrow then.”

A low voice. The man put the unlit pipe into his pocket, then turned his back, looking around with a hint of disappointment.

It feels a bit wrong to just let him go… one coffee should be fine…

“Would you mind waiting a moment? I’ll make you a special cup.”

“Oh, that would be kind. An Americano, please. Very hot.”

“….”

“….”

It bothered me.

While I was making coffee, the man didn’t take his eyes off me. With his hands clasped together and held to his face, his mask kept moving slightly up and down.

He looked at my neck, then lowered his gaze to my backside. The unseen eyes behind the mask rapidly scanned my figure from behind.

I was wearing a short-sleeved shirt and pants, but for some reason, every part of my body felt itchy. Armpits, toes, the back of my ears… It must be my imagination.

“Here’s your Americano~. It’s hot, so please be careful~.”

Normally, I’d ring the bell for the customer to pick it up themselves, but the battery wasn’t charged, and since he was the only one, I decided to serve him personally.

“…”

“…Sir?”

“You resemble her. Your physique, foot size, the distance between your footprints from your gait. The bruise on your neck, which looks like it was injured yesterday… Was it caused by hitting the ground or a tree near the Prison?”

Freeze-

“You defeated the Evil Eye that was charmed by your alluring appearance, then a grappling hook… a wire gun would be suitable for a body like yours. You used it to climb to the rooftop and infiltrate through the ventilation duct.

“Things seemed to be going smoothly, but you were discovered by the Seven Stars waiting in the safe and subdued. Afterwards, you were dragged to the Punishment Room but rescued by a Magical Girl and escaped… Am I correct? Phantom Thief Lupin.”

As I set the coffee on the table, my body froze like ice.

“You have a look of incomprehension. Is it because a troublesome customer suddenly spouted nonsense, or are you surprised by the truth… I cannot read your expression and deduce. Rest assured, you are merely the most likely suspect on my list.”

“Haa… I hear that a lot, you know? Customers keep asking because the Phantom Thief’s name and the cafe’s name are the same. This is already the umpteenth time, seriously…”

I mustn’t be found out.

“The bruise on the back of my neck is from a coffee sack falling on me while I was organizing the storage room.”

“Is that so… Let’s go with that then.”

Until now, there had been annoying customers who poked fun, but never a crazy bastard who deduced my identity just from my physique and actions.

What’s certain is that the masked man in front of me investigated the location where I fired the wire gun yesterday, and he’s the closest to the truth that I am Lupin. Even the nobles never tracked me this closely…

“My apologies, please disregard what I just said.”

“Yes, yes~. I’m just curious, why are you investigating Lupin? Are you a police officer? Or someone who works at the Prison?”

“Hmph… It’s elementary, you cunt.”

…..?

Did I mishear?

“You… what?”

“I am merely an ordinary detective. My name is… yes, you may call me Holmes. And you??”

“…It’s Seri! Lee Seri.”

“Indeed… Seri. I have a feeling we’ll meet often.”

“If you become a regular… I might be happy? Hehe~.”

I have to deceive him.

I must deceive him.

To shake off Holmes’s suspicion, I acted with all my might.

“….”

Unaware that he already knew everything.