Me and My Time (3)

I ask myself, can pleasure only be derived from masochism? If someone were to ask Yujin, he would answer like this: I don’t know yet. It’s just that, by chance, I found the taste of masochism first among the many stimuli that exist in this world.

There are no regrets. I was just desperate. Back in those days when I was dying from not getting any stimulation, I had to do something, anything.

• Pook.

“Eueup.”

White thread densely sewn between his lips. Blood droplets form, gradually turning red. The copy ego observed ‘me,’ whose mouth was blocked and only making hot nasal sounds, with an interesting gaze.

“What do you think would have happened if I was an S instead of an M?”

She muttered, taking out a new needle. This time, gold thread. The same color as the hair of the guy lying over there. The copy ego waited for Yujin’s reaction while threading the needle.

“…”

A look that says, how can I speak with my mouth sewn shut? I know. An answer wasn’t needed. I’m asking myself, so my thoughts are the answer, right? Then let’s imagine. What if I found stimulation in murder or torture?

I set up a hypothesis. I didn’t feel much when killing gangsters or trash. But what if it was someone I shouldn’t kill? If I caught and killed nobles at every turn, and tortured those who showed me kindness in return. Even if it wasn’t that kind, what if I gained stimulation by using others?

• There would only be chaos.

At the same time as drawing the conclusion, a telepathic message is delivered.

Yes, chaos. The copy ego realized it was a meaningless question and stopped asking. No matter what I ask, the other person is me. My thoughts are the correct answer. Then, twisting it a bit, to the ‘future Yujin’ who is not me.

“Do you have any regrets?”

• Pook.

“Kkeueup…!”

“Ah, sorry. It’s not a mistake.”

She tried to pierce the skin but touched the cornea. Did I stab too deep? My control was poor because I wasn’t paying attention to the work. But I didn’t intend to put in the effort. She pierced the squishy lens beyond the cornea as it was.

“Kkeuheueup…!”

The needle that pierced the eyeball came out safely, and the copy ego, who was having fun bursting eyes, poked at the eyes using a large needle. An amateur’s hand movements without any precision. Blood flowed down from the eyes sewn straight and without obstruction.

All the way to the other side. She sewed all the eyes together, didn’t even tie the needle knot, and let go as it was. The large needle hanging from the eyes dangled, tapping his neck. Now the groundwork is done. It’s time to get into real torture where blood and guts flow.

“I’ll hear the answer later. Right now… this looks more fun.”

Yujin’s appearance, sewn like a cheap stuffed doll, was miserable. He put so much force into his lower abdomen as if enduring the pain. The copy ego didn’t think Yujin was really just enduring the pain.

• Deureureuk!

She drags a hook from the stand. A silver hook for hanging pigs or cows. Now it’s time for a person to be hung instead of livestock.

• Pook.

“Eukkeueueueup….”

He’s pulled up with telekinesis and stabbed right through. Yujin, with sharp needles stuck in both shoulders, groaned so hard his lips tore. The more he tried to open his mouth, the more it tore and opened. The copy ego sighed, looking at his increasingly open mouth.

“I’ll sew it back up if it tears.”

“Kkeueup, kkeuk… heueup…”

“Do you think I’ll be fooled by you shedding tears?”

I don’t know if the pouring dark red liquid is blood or tears, but he did shed something in unbearable pain. Tuduk, tuk. The smell of urine spreading in the room. He pissed himself. It wasn’t too bad. It was like an air freshener, to put it a bit crudely. In the first place, there’s no way he could pee when there are no waste products in his body. If you want to be precise, it’s not urine, it’s Mana.

“Was I like this when I came?”

• Seureung.

It was truly vulgar. The copy ego, leaving a short impression, roughly shook off the apron stained with blood and filth and grabbed a butcher knife.

“Where should I cut…”

The copy ego muttered for a long time, gauging the area to cut the skin. Should I start between the breasts, or should I cut from the navel? While worrying about that, a watermelon-sized chest came into view.

I couldn’t resist. She reflexively pressed her chest. The chest, which arrived past the smell of blood and salt, was really fluffy. The texture was so good that she regretted her own meager chest. Not stopping there, she also stabbed or pinched it with a sharp object because it was strangely addictive. And she. Witnessed an unbelievable phenomenon.

• Jjiik.

“…”

When she pressed her chest, a whitish liquid popped out with a ‘jjik’ sound. She stiffened in surprise. The copy ego glared at Yujin with a cold look. He can’t see because his eyes and mouth are sewn shut, but he can probably grasp the atmosphere.

“Are you pregnant?”

Pregnant? It couldn’t have been a mistake. There were many ways to get rid of it with magic, or to cut it out along with the uterus. He couldn’t have gotten pregnant unless he was sprawled out for days after being raped. Even if she pressed her chest again, it still popped out without change. Yes, Breast Milk.

“You crazy bitch. Did you erase it?”

The copy ego rarely despised. Even when I left for the snowy mountains to subjugate the Orcs, I put in the maximum effort to prevent people from dying in my games. Besides that, I didn’t kill anyone unless they were trash. I swore to pursue stimulation but not abandon humanity.

“Eueukkeup….”

Yujin twitched his mouth. Only the sound of wind escaping through his torn lips could be heard, but I could tell that it wasn’t just a simple groan but contained meaning. The copy ego waited for an answer with the blade placed near his chest. If there was no answer within a few seconds, she would cut open his stomach right away.

“Saha… kkeup…”

Yujin desperately opened his mouth. The lips pulled by the thread were torn and the gums were torn. It was hard to find anything other than red below his nose, he had shed so much blood. With that desperate effort, the thread broke. She spat out the blood she had been holding and said faintly.

“Sara… isseo…”

Alive.

“…”

The copy ego was silent. She becomes a stone with the blade raised to her chest. She rolled her eyes quickly. The blond man lying over there… Shuriel. I heard that Yujin and his soul are connected, so a small amount of shock can be transmitted. But that’s beside the point, and if that’s the case, then maybe this guy is… the baby’s father…?

I’m crazy. What am I thinking? Right now, Yujin and I are different people in every way. The difference was too big. The situation was different from when I was first created. Back then, the original owner was already an idiot. But this… it felt dirty. Yes. That’s all.

• Teong.

The sound of metal ringing at that moment.

When I turned my head to the source of the sound, I saw Yujin shaking violently. Yujin, writhing pitifully, made a strange groan as if he was broken. It seemed that the blood-sucking insect had safely settled in his brain.

“Ha, hi, hik. Geu, gama. Geumaha.”

Yujin, twisting his neck and toes as if he had epilepsy, was laughingly, ridiculously. I couldn’t see it well because of his torn lips and the blood he spat out, but I could tell. If I were in that situation, I would have come in a big way for sure.

“Hi, higik. Sa, saryeo, jeu. Ha, haik.”

Seeing myself dying… I might be a little excited. To be honest, torture was only fun at first, but it became less fun later. Was I born a Majo? Damn it. Shit. In the end, no matter what I do, this bottom-of-the-barrel life is confirmed.

“Kkeuk, kkik. Heu. Hak…?!”

As I was letting out a self-deprecating laugh, Yujin’s convulsions reached their peak. About ten minutes had passed… it must have dug into the center of his brain. Seeing that he was still alive even after being eaten that much, his durability was really amazing. It was a body optimized for playing with.

“Kkeuk, a, a. Eu. A….”

The convulsions weakened as time passed. The flow of Mana felt in his body also weakened. What that meant was clear.

“A, a….”

He’s dying.

“…”

And he died.

That thing hanging on the hook was now just a useless lump of meat, not a human. Yujin, who had spilled his intestines, was limp and motionless. He was definitely dead.

The copy ego got up from her seat and approached ‘me’. Square stars adorning the sky. Among them, two stars that shone weakly. Not the lump of meat hanging over there, but the extra body made in advance.

There were two bodies in the magic circle. Right or left. I bet in my heart which body the original owner linked to. Which body would I enter if I were me? Right now, I liked the body on the right better. The copy ego squatted down, hoping that the body on the right would open its eyes.

“Eue…?”

But it was the body on the left that opened its eyes.

“Ha, euk, eueuk…?”

벌떡. Yujin, who had come to his senses, gasped and convulsed. He scratched the floor so hard his fingernails fell out, and screamed. The copy ego seemed to know why Yujin was convulsing like that. It’s ‘death’. I don’t know if this is the first time he’s experienced it, but I guarantee it brought him stimulation beyond the limit.

“Haa, haa….”

The copy ego watched Yujin’s convulsions with interest. Soon, after the convulsions and self-harm ended, what followed was a chilling smile. Yujin smiled brightly. He smiled, raising the corners of his mouth towards the copy ego so hard they tore.

I respond to that smile.

“Yeah. That’s right.”

The copy ego said, grabbing the knife again.

“There’s still a lot left.”