Me and My Time (2)

* * *

“…This is insane.”

Above the magic circle drawn with blood, a crimson chunk of meat writhes and bubbles. The nauseating stench of greasy oil permeates the surroundings, but it soon fades. Granshel licks his dry lips repeatedly, mouth agape. The moment of creation. Only dry, cold air escapes from the entrance hole, the size of a platinum coin.

“…Just so you know, this isn’t black magic.”

I say, burning the finger I used as a brush with fire. Hwareureuk. The smell of burning flesh faintly spreads. I smell that disgusting yet familiar odor, and my eyes flash open.

The chunk of meat rapidly transforms into a human form. The lines of muscle become prominent, and internal organs are created. Small cracks appear on the blank face, and before long, eyes and a nose are formed.

Spare bodies. One body to house a copy ego, two bodies to designate as backup points in case of death. It was like a game. Extra coins, or something. I had no intention of denying it. This world was no different from a game to me. But I kept trying not to live that way, not to treat this world like a game, but in the end, I couldn’t feel any tension.

“Yujin. This, this… What on earth…”

Pawin’s eyes tremble madly. Is this the sacred moment of creating life, or an impious act that encroaches on the domain of the gods? It’s neither, but I couldn’t deny that either way, the goal was extremely repulsive. She speaks with a mouth that trembles as much as her pupils.

“If this isn’t black magic… I don’t know what to call it… I really don’t.”

Doubt. But she trusts me. She couldn’t sense any demonic energy from me. I wasn’t using someone else’s soul, or someone else’s body. I say, reconstructing my severed finger.

“Magic.”

• Ttak.

I snap my fingers to coincide with the sound of the second hand.

The finger snap was a signal. The magic circle glows blue, and surging Mana spirals towards the sky. Kugugung! At the same time, the Tower Master’s room vibrates. I saw three women lying stretched out in the middle of the room filled with blue light. Vacant eyes, red hair. Smaller breasts than now. And… eyes that had rotted like those of a dead fish.

It was me.

• Ttak.

The sound of the minute hand turning.

A little further forward. A little further forward from the past I had lived through. I pull on the timeline. Following the stream of Mana waves where experience and memories have accumulated, I find the right time. A time when I was still indifferent to death. When I was living a shoddy life chasing only pleasure.

• Ttak.

The hour hand turns, and the swirling Mana is established. At that moment, the vertices connected to the four ‘me’s, including me. Above the sky. The Mana, embroidered like constellations, formed a large square. The brightest vertex among them… the single body that would contain the copy ego.

I immediately knelt down and pressed my palm on the magic circle. I had to adjust it so that the ego wouldn’t bounce out. It would be very easy to make the copy ego an intangible existence, like when I was cooked by Parsih, but it was an indispensable process since I had to move the body directly to torture myself.

It was intense. So intense that my hair floated up. The windows shattered and the shelves broke in the torrent of fluctuating Mana. Cold wind and snow enter, caught up in the erratic flow. I sensed it when the wind brushed my cheek and snow faintly piled up on my shoulder.

‘Open your eyes.’

Yujin.

The me of the past.

It’s time to wake up.

* * *

The copy ego can instinctively know the reason for its creation. That I am a machine that cannot exist as a soul, only containing memories. No matter how much I create a new continuity based on past memories and experiences, in the end, it will only be a copy.

“….”

The Yujin who opened her eyes realized that she was lying on a cold stone floor. If she indifferently turned her eyes in that state, there were bodies that looked exactly like her scattered around. She twists the corners of her mouth with a rotten expression.

벌떡. She raises her head and looks at the ‘me’ in front of her. The real ‘me’ looked down at herself with strange eyes. The copy ego calmly analyzed the creator in front of her.

Even if I can’t be the real thing, that doesn’t mean I’m not ‘Yujin’. But there were differences. If I had to pick a decisive difference, it would be the large breasts. I also felt like I was a few centimeters taller.

But that kind of thing wasn’t important. There was a time difference. The ‘me’ in front of me is not the me of the same time period. The copy ego’s last memory was when she escaped from Parsih’s cooking and walked towards Kahalia.

Estimate the time period. Where am I? The cold wind and snow coming in through the broken window. The height is quite high. And this space is expanded with space magic. The guess was quick. This is a magic tower. Then who are the humans around me? A blond beanpole collapsed on the floor. An Inquisitor praying with an iron mace. A blind man trembling with his mouth open. Judging from the look in the eyes of the creator Yujin, it seemed, it seemed….

……Those seemed like comrades.

‘Comrades?’

I made comrades? The copy ego reflexively stared directly into Yujin’s eyes. They weren’t rotten eyes like hers. A little gentler, still rotten, but eyes that had regained a little vitality.

The copy ego bit her lip tightly. Tasting the bitter taste of blood, she smiled so wide that her lips tore.

“…You said you wouldn’t make them?”

And she retorted. Judging from the circumstances, it seemed like she had brought back the last memory from before a certain ‘change’ as a starting point. Yeah. Let’s say that’s the case. But the ‘me’ at that time swore.

Never make a copy ego again.

The creator in front of her twitched her eyebrows and said.

“…Just before leaving for Kahalia. When you were walking on the plains?”

“That’s right.”

It was the future me.

The copy ego wore a twisted smile.

“Looks like you’re sane this time?”

“Well, for now.”

“So you’re about to get fucked over. So why did you make me? Even preparing a body like this.”

A threesome? Or more than that? Or it could be an even more bizarre play.

To be honest, the memory of the day I swore not to make a copy ego again didn’t really move me. Even if she broke that promise, it wouldn’t be anything more than sarcasm to her. There would be disappointment, but she had never once thought of herself as a principled person in her life. She had vaguely imagined that someday she would become a bottom-of-the-barrel person beyond repair in some way.

“Ha.”

Yujin gave a bitter smile at the copy ego’s nonchalant question. Back then, too, the copy ego tended to be more easygoing than her original personality. Was it because she knew she was going to die anyway, so she was just going wild?

Anyway.

Yujin said to Pawin and Granshel, who couldn’t escape from the shock and horror.

“If it’s uncomfortable to watch, you can leave. Just leave the portal. And don’t let anyone in. I’ll tell you when it’s all over.”

―Call me when it’s over! Granshel exits as soon as the words are spoken. Pawin silently keeps his place, leaves a short apology, and follows him out. Only a soulless machine, an Archmage, and a horned Agent remain in the room.

The copy ego got up from her seat and approached Yujin.

“I knew it, but I didn’t know you’d become such a perfect female. Your 말투 (mal-tu) has changed like a girl’s. And your body, too.”

“Oh my, are you curious about what happened to me?”

“…Shibal. Get lost.”

Yujin playfully lifted her skirt and wiggled her hips. The copy ego was shocked by the extreme of female corruption. Look at the pinnacle of that onahole body. Curses of admiration naturally come out.

Conversely, Yujin burst into hollow laughter as she looked at the copy ego’s meager body. Her body is dangerous now, but it was really more dangerous in many ways back then. What the hell were those bastards who liked that kind of body? Ah. Shuriel, that’s right.

The copy ego erased her smile and said to Yujin.

“…What do I have to do?”

“Torture me. First. Sew up my lips and eyes. Second. Hang both shoulders on hooks and cut open my stomach to take out my intestines. Third. Drive nails into my fingernails and toenails and put bugs in my ears.”

“That’s not torture, that’s like butchering. Can’t you still forget being cooked back then?”

That was a bit stimulating. The copy ego nodded, understanding in a strange way. Yujin seriously thought about what her past self was like while looking at that sight. And looking at the Agent sleeping far away, she said.

“There’s someone I have to save.”

The energy drains away. The copy ego was disappointed that it wasn’t that kind of thing. Yujin seemed to know what the copy ego was thinking and opened her mouth.

“So, are you not going to do it?”

“I’ll do it. Don’t rush me. I’m just curious. What’s the connection between saving someone and being tortured that makes you so desperate? Is it because of the man over there?”

“It’s not the man over there, it’s Shuriel. He’s possessed by a vengeful spirit because of something. Do you know what Seongbul (성불) is?”

“Don’t tell me, you’re going to follow exactly what the soul went through? You’re really… really, like me.”

Was I consistently myself? The copy ego smiled and approached Shuriel naked.

“But, but….”

A strange man with horns on his head. Maybe Yujin approached him wanting to be tortured. A vengeful spirit is attached to your body, I’ll help you achieve Seongbul (성불). But it didn’t seem like a wasteful encounter. There was a smell of comrades who had been together for a long time.

• Kuk.

She pokes his cheek. The copy ego, squatting in front of Shuriel, touched and observed Shuriel’s here and there.

“…I can’t understand it. His face is decent, but I’m not the type to get attached just because someone’s face is a little handsome.”

“Do you expect to be understood?”

“No. Not at all. It’s terrible.”

It was a time when I was indifferent to death. Even if she looks easygoing on the outside, her inside must be full of endless self-hatred and suicidal impulses. That’s why she can be nonchalant because there is a confirmed self-denial called ‘the real Yujin’ and a clear end.

“Let’s start.”

Yujin said, approaching the copy ego who was staring intently at Shuriel. The copy ego did not react to Yujin’s words and remained silent for a few seconds. She turned around only when the warmth conveyed from her cheek was about to be forgotten.

It was a slightly strange reaction, but Yujin didn’t care. The copy ego does not deviate from the set system. It was the difference between having a soul and not having one. There is learning, but no deviation. Knowing that, she says it as if throwing it away.

“Do you remember the torture process? The sewing tools and bloodsucking bugs are in your pocket, so take them out and use them. Now I’ll make the hooks. We can start right away.”

“Is there a risk of being caught?”

“This is the Tower Master’s room. There’s no risk of being caught.”

When she snaps her fingers, sharp hooks and iron chains are created. The copy ego, who received the objects, quickly prepared the torture rack.

“Are you going to do it naked?”

The Yujin being tortured naturally needed to be naked, but the copy ego did not. The copy ego wore only an apron on her naked body and held a knife.

“Is there any reason for me to be embarrassed to see my own body?”

“…I guess not. Let’s just start.”

Deureureuk! The rack with the hooks makes a metallic sound as it is pulled. Soon, I’ll be hanging there and butchered like livestock.

The copy ego felt envy. Parsih’s human butchery was so great that you could die if you did it wrong. It was a pity that she couldn’t feel the pleasure at that time, but it was a rare opportunity to see ‘the me being tortured’ from a third-person perspective. The copy ego took out the sewing tools from her pocket and said.

“First. Sew up the mouth and eyes. You won’t be able to see or speak anymore, so do you have any last words?”

Yujin glanced at Shuriel, who was lying comfortably, and said.

“After the torture is over, can you tell me your impressions?”