In the Sewers (1)

“Haa…”

Someone so innocent just wasn’t my type.

I refused the blanket that Clark offered and spoke carefully.

“Clark.”

“Yes?”

“It’s better if you go back now.”

If you die, I’ll feel unnecessarily uneasy.

What I’m about to do is a kind of masochistic act. A longing for life that can only be felt at the end of pain, and the emotions that bloom vividly in the process. Of course, ordinary self-harm had its limits. If the premise of ‘not dying’ is set, my mind cools down rapidly.

I need to paralyze the wizard’s reason with extreme situations to fully feel the emotions of the ‘real me’.

-Kill the wizard’s reason that gnaws at my ego.

That was all.

Of course, not all wizards are like me.

The harmony of experience and knowledge, and the wisdom gained in the process. Most wizards have a good balance between ‘reason as a wizard’ and ‘reason as a human’ through long training. But I’m not. I awakened to the ultimate of magic without any training. Even just a few seconds after falling into this other world.

Thus, the perfect mind completed without experience, rather made the mind imperfect. Would a diesel car run if you put gasoline in it? At least that’s how I’m moving. It’s like something that should have broken down quickly is still running.

It feels like my ego is fragmented. I don’t know if the judgments I make are entirely my own. It’s a wonder I haven’t gone insane. Or maybe I already am.

“Go back?”

Clark’s eyes widened at the sudden suggestion to return.

“T-This is unfair. I properly-“

“Shh.”

-Jjalgeurang.

Not wanting to waste energy on this, I chose material over conversation.

Clark silently stared at the two silver coins faintly shining on my palm.

“2 silver.”

As I silently placed the coins in his hand, the sound of him swallowing hard was loud.

It doesn’t take much to persuade people. Just a little money is enough. If they don’t come over, you should first consider whether you have enough money.

For an E-rank adventurer, earning 2 silver requires months of hard work.

Even if you exterminate rats for several days, you only get 1 silver. And if you divide that among four people, it’s a small amount of 25 coppers per person. Considering accommodation, food, fuel, and equipment maintenance, it’s just running in place like a hamster on a wheel.

Clark seemed to have a lot to say, but he just turned his back with a resentful expression. He will leave the underground waterway as I said and return to the guild.

To be honest, I wouldn’t care at all if that bastard died or not…

…

…How could I not care if someone dies?

I bit my lip.

I became anxious.

The sound of water droplets falling, the sound of rats gnawing on corpses, even Hairak’s snoring. All of it is heard clearly. For the record, the hooded man didn’t fall asleep. He was pretending to sleep.

Time passed, and the hooded man approached.

It was time to switch the night watch.

He had a sleepy expression, but it was obviously an act.

“Where did the blonde brat go?”

“He ran away. He said he hated cold, damp places.”

The hooded man was silent for a few seconds, then said in a soft voice.

“I see. Understood. Rest comfortably. We’ll take the rest of the watch.”

I wrapped the worn-out piece of cloth around my body, curled up in a corner, and closed my eyes.

I wasn’t particularly tired or exhausted, so I didn’t fall asleep. After being awake in the darkness for a few minutes, I felt the hooded man’s gaze. It was a chilling gaze, enough to make me feel like ants were crawling on me.

Exactly 26 minutes and 41 seconds passed.

-Buseureok.

The sound of the tent being ripped open was heard.

-Keuheung. Shit. Is it my turn already?

-The blonde brat ran away.

-What? Shit, what are you talking about, no. No, is that bitch okay?

-She’s curled up and sleeping.

The hooded man and Hairak’s conversation was heard simultaneously.

-Keuheu. Good. Let’s start.

Footsteps were heard. The footsteps grew closer and closer, and by the time I opened my eyes, they were already in front of me.

“Keuhaa. How are you, Wizard-nim?”

Eyes filled with base greed.

Hairak’s oily cheeks trembled uncontrollably as he couldn’t contain his laughter. The hooded man standing behind him was also letting out an unpleasant laugh.

My eyes met Hairak’s.

Hairak spat and raised his scabbard-

-Paak!

“Ugh…!”

He struck my head as it was.

Blood trickled down between my eyes, as if my scalp had been torn.

“What? You’re not fainting? Too bad. Heuryap!”

-Kwajik!

Hairak swung his sword greatly with a strange shout, striking my side. It was a strong blow, enough to hear the sound of bones breaking.

“Eueup, ugh. Keuwaek.”

Stomach acid is regurgitating.

The jerky I ate before standing watch came back up.

My breath stopped for a moment because of the pain. Hairak seemed to like the sight of me catching my breath roughly and coughing, so he just stood there and watched me.

“You bitch. I didn’t like you from the first time I saw you. A greenhorn like you comes to be an adventurer? You learned some shitty magic by chance and showed off, what’s your situation now?”

-Peok!

“Huh? You shitty bitch. Say something. Do you think I’m a joke?”

-Peoeok!

“Ugh… Heueuk.”

I gritted my teeth and suppressed my groans.

My ribs seemed to be broken and piercing my lungs. Only a hoarse sound like air escaping from a balloon came from my throat, and my eyes were obscured by blood, so I couldn’t see ahead.

Hairak grabbed my hair and lifted me up as it was.

“Your hair is also bright red, it goes well with blood?”

-Hwik.

Then he threw me as it was. Kung! I plunged my face into the sewer floor and bled profusely from my nose.

This might have cracked my skull…. If I had hit it a little harder, it could have been really dangerous.

Hairak was holding a coin pouch in his hand.

“Keuhaa. How much is this all worth? As expected of a wizard. Those bastards have a lot of money.”

“Don’t overdo it. I have to enjoy it too.”

“Ah, yeah, yeah. I’m done, so do what you want.”

Murdered by desire.

My life is torn apart by their base desires.

“Heu, heueu…”

But, but.

Why,

am I laughing?

All the pain is felt vividly.

All the strength in my body is drained.

The taste of blood flowing into my mouth was really fishy.

“Laugh? Do you even know what you’re about to go through?”

“He, heeu. Heuhi…”

“She’s completely crazy…”

I hated myself for laughing even in this serious situation. Shame, resentment, despair…. Emotions that I, ‘Wizard Yujin’, would never have felt normally. All of this becomes a new stimulus and envelops me.

The hooded man grabbed my neck tightly with one hand. It was obvious what was going to happen. He tightened his grip. My already difficult breathing was completely cut off by the hooded man.

“Originally, I would have done it as it was…… but wizards are dangerous. Sorry. I’ll take your arm.”

I blankly watched the tool that the hooded man took out. I opened my mouth and tried to shout something, but no sound came from my blocked throat.

It’s a saw.

The hooded man took out a saw.

The rusty hacksaw blade reflected the light in the rotten waters, emitting a blue light.

Even if a wizard of my level had an arm cut off, it wouldn’t mean I couldn’t use magic, but it was true that it would interfere with magical events. Most wizards emit magic through their fingertips. The same was true for me.

Should I resist now?

They were guys who could be torn apart like dust with just one simple magic spell.

“Hey. Can I use a potion?”

“Huh? Ah, go ahead. Is a potion the problem now? I have 70 silver in my hands.”

“That’s a lot. Then I won’t refuse and use it.”

The reason I don’t resist,

though I really hate to admit it,

is that I might be looking forward to the pain that will come.

Maybe I buttoned the first button wrong. The first thing I sought as a means to relieve boredom was pain…. If there was something other than pain, if there was something that could eliminate the ennui close to mental illness, would I have ruined my body this much?

I felt strange myself, but it was irreversible.

The hooded man choked my neck with his left hand and prepared to cut off my arm with the hacksaw blade in his right hand.

As the chilling sensation of the steel touched my right arm, I shuddered.

“Eugeu…euek hageuek!! Higeueuek!!”

I writhed in unimaginable pain, but since I was pinned down by the hooded man and couldn’t move, only a slight vibration flowed. Geudeuk, geudeudeuk…. Every time I pulled the hacksaw blade back and forth, the violent sound of muscles being torn and bones being cut echoed in the underground waterway.

My breath stops from the pain of having my arm cut off alive.

At the same time, the muscles throughout my body repeatedly contract and relax, convulsing.

I bit down hard enough to break my teeth.

Even so, I didn’t faint.

The strong mental strength of an Archmage was vividly accepting every moment.

“Stay still. If you don’t want to die.”

I drooled and glanced at my severed right arm. But that was only for a moment, the hooded man kicked my right arm away. Pungdeong! My right arm, which fell into the dirty underground waterway, floated away far away along the flow of water.

After cutting off my arm, the hooded man wrapped a cloth around a wooden stick and started pouring oil on it. Surely he’s not trying to cauterize the wound with fire. I didn’t have the strength to scream or move, so I could only whimper.

Chijijik!

“Heugeueuk!!”

The burning torch sears the cut surface.

The smell of burning flesh stung my nose.

The smell of burning human flesh is said to be similar to the smell of burning seafood, although opinions may vary. That disgusting smell flowed from the cut surface.

“Heueueu…”

This feeling of my life being entirely in the hands of others…

While writhing in pain, I felt a slight excitement, and at the same time, extreme self-loathing enveloped my whole body. But all the pain and humiliation had long since turned into a slow but never-ending stimulus.

“Damn, are you turned on by that?”

“I can’t help it, I’m a wizard.”

“So, you want to do it even if it means cutting off your limbs.”

“You wouldn’t understand. How beautiful this is…”

“You’re talking bullshit. I’d rather go to a brothel and hold busty whores than hold a kid like that.”

A sigh followed.

The hooded man seemed to have hesitated whether to cut off the other arm with the hacksaw blade, but he shook his head after seeing my limp appearance.

At that moment, a sudden, rough touch was felt.

“Haeuk!”

-Tududuk!

The hooded man roughly tore off the top I was wearing. A small, but never insufficient, snow-white chest revealed itself. Although it was soaked in blood, the white and soft skin was still intact. The man carefully stroked the skin, as if admiring the flawless white skin.

A moment of rising disgust.

“Plea, please, sto, stop-“