episode_0412

.

I was utterly dumbfounded.

This stupid rock attached to my neck couldn’t comprehend the situation at all.

“…What are you?”

“…….”

“I asked what you are. …You said you’ve been together for over ten years.”

I wondered if I could use today’s incident to demand something more from Seol Da-bin.

I immediately crushed such naive thoughts.

Forcing her thighs apart as she kept trying to close them,

on the opposite side of my right hand gripping her thigh tightly,

I used the one free thumb of my left hand to spread Seol Da-bin’s labia apart.

Though I couldn’t fully part them to both sides because she kept squirming,

at least to one side.

Quite blatantly.

The entrance, now just beginning to moisten,

was fully exposed inside.

“…….”

“…….”

Whether she was embarrassed by the thought of another man seeing her like this, she kept squirming and flinching slightly, but I paid no attention to that.

The problem was that.

I even scrutinized her body to make sure I wasn’t mistaken, but that was the issue.

…A hymen.

Others might not know, but Seol Da-bin, you shouldn’t have this.

A woman who’s been with her boyfriend for over ten years.

Even during her middle and high school years, when she was surrounded by horny bastards, she lived next door to her boyfriend.

And she still has this?

Does that make any sense?

“…Religion? Purity before marriage, or something like that?”

“…….”

“Speak quickly. I feel like I’ll suffocate from frustration.”

“…It’s just. I’ve never felt like doing it.”

I vaguely remembered Christianity having something like that, but it didn’t seem to be the reason.

But believing her “just because” answer would be even more foolish.

As much as I wanted to pry open Seol Da-bin’s mind, I didn’t have the ability.

At best, I could only uncomfortably dismiss it as her not wanting to talk about it yet.

Then, how far had she gone with her boyfriend?

Had they only held hands? Even that would be ridiculous.

Surely they’d at least kissed.

Even if they hadn’t had full intercourse, maybe they’d done oral or handjobs.

And…

As I entertained these wild speculations one by one, I eventually scraped them all away.

No matter what.

The one thing I was certain of was that she hadn’t fully done it with her boyfriend yet.

Because it was right in front of my eyes.

Because I might be able to take it.

“Sigh… Anyway, then that consultation last time…”

“I haven’t done it… but I know what sex is like…”

She still hadn’t done it.

Hearing Seol Da-bin say it herself made my blood surge, but I suppressed it and continued.

Trying to force anything on this woman wouldn’t work.

I had to make it happen naturally.

I had to guide her to feel interest naturally.

I had to make her let her guard down naturally.

I had to create a secret, naturally.

And the surest way to do that… was, of course…

To become a useful man to Seol Da-bin.

To become a substitute who could replace her boyfriend.

If I got the chance…

I had more than enough confidence to pull it off.

“…You haven’t done it, yet you were going to use that for your first experience?”

“…What’s wrong with that? A toy wouldn’t be much different from the real thing…”

“Sigh… Damn it, that’s not what I meant…”

“….”

Though I’d already been acting quite pushy, even the “nice guy” mask I’d worn to lower Seol Da-bin’s guard had its limits now.

Earlier, in front of her after catching her with the dildo,

I’d deliberately used rough language to appear agitated, but now was different.

The situation was fucking ridiculous.

Absurd.

And yet, the thought that I could be the first to defile her made my blood rush.

Anyway, my emotions were all over the place, making it hard to filter even the basics.

I just blurted out whatever came to mind and tried to clean up afterward.

So I took a deep breath, exhaled as if emptying my lungs, and tried to cool my overheated head.

If I got too excited, I might flip this perfectly set table over.

…First, her excuse about not being in the mood was obviously bullshit.

What I needed to focus on now was

the details of Seol Da-bin’s relationship with her boyfriend.

Why hadn’t they done it even once in all this time?

They always seemed close, like childhood friends should be, so what was the problem?

Come to think of it, a few weeks ago, she’d asked me what men liked. She’d said it was something like a rut.

And when they went to the beach, she’d prepared a pretty bold swimsuit. Maybe it was related to that rut she mentioned.

…A rut. A rut.

Could it be that they weren’t not doing it but couldn’t do it?

Of course, Seol Da-bin had just said her boyfriend was average-sized,

but not having done it in over ten years might mean he wasn’t average.

After the barbecue, when we ran into each other in the living room because her boyfriend was snoring—was there another reason?

Why did she buy a dildo that resembled mine instead of her boyfriend’s?

Following these tangled hypotheses for a moment,

trying to make sense of them with my thick skull,

“…….”

First, this.

I released Seol Da-bin’s thigh, distancing myself slightly as I spoke.

“Using a toy for your first experience, what kind of…”

“….”

“…Get dressed. Let’s go outside and talk.”

Not out of sympathy—

but because an opportunity like this would never come again.

Before Baek Ji-ho.

Without Baek Ji-ho knowing.

With the intention of firmly entangling myself with his precious girlfriend.

…My already fully erect cock

hid slowly, conscious of Seol Da-bin’s gaze.

412

I didn’t care about being humiliated by Seo Woo-jin.

After all, I’d pretended to be experienced all this time, but the truth was I’d never been with a man. The biggest reason for that was my own fault.

What could I do?

So if Seo Woo-jin treated me like an idiot, I planned to just keep my mouth shut and let it go in one ear and out the other.

Well, in the end, he pressed me for an answer, so I gave a brief reply…

But that was within the expected range.

What happened afterward, though, went a little differently than I’d imagined.

“Drink.”

“…Shouldn’t doctors usually tell people not to drink stuff like Coke?”

“I’m not a doctor. If you get hurt or sick, it’s just more money for me.”

“…….”

I’d expected to be forcibly deflowered by Seo Woo-jin.

I thought by now, he’d be shoving that dildo deep inside me.

But instead of suffering that shameful act, I found myself sitting on a dimly lit playground swing, handed a vending machine Coke.

How the hell did this happen?

Of course, this was much better than being violated by Seo Woo-jin, but I couldn’t figure out what was going on in his head, which was frustrating.

Could it really be just because I was a virgin…?

As I fiddled with the Coke can I’d just been given, the sound of clinking chains came from beside me.

Probably dirty from kids stepping on it, Seo Woo-jin was brushing off the swing with his hand.

“…I’ll drink it.”

I didn’t particularly like carbonated drinks, but it would be rude to spit on someone’s kindness.

I winced at the sharp carbonation as I swallowed the sugary liquid.

Meanwhile, Seo Woo-jin, sitting on the swing, was sipping his Coke too.

He even muttered something about why people paid to drink this stuff.

I almost asked why he’d bought two cans in the first place, but I swallowed the words.

Because Seo Woo-jin, who’d poured his Coke on the dirt ground, spoke first.

“Of course, I assumed you’d had experience.”

Come to think of it, his speech had switched back to formal.

Had the informal tone earlier been because he was flustered after confirming I was a virgin?

All my friends had mistakenly assumed I was experienced too, so it was natural for Seo Woo-jin to be confused.

Especially after catching me buying a dildo… It would’ve been hard to imagine I was a virgin.

Not that any of this would’ve happened if Seo Woo-jin hadn’t acted like trash in the first place.

Surprisingly, this part didn’t bother me much.

It was like not expecting model behavior from a delinquent student.

Seo Woo-jin had already propositioned me for sex…

And consulted me about his excessive libido…

So using my weakness to steer things in a dirty direction was as natural as pirates plundering a village.

Of course, that didn’t mean it was okay for him to threaten or rape me.

But I could understand his circumstances, so I tilted the Coke can slightly and replied.

“…I get it. Even I wouldn’t have thought I was a virgin.”

Listening to my friends’ relationship stories lately, about six or seven out of ten had sex soon after getting a boyfriend.

Some even had sex first and then started dating because they liked their partner.

Of course, those cases were mostly one-night stands or friends-with-benefits situations that developed into something more…

Even Ha-yoon had probably slept with Seo Woo-jin within two weeks of getting together.

And here I was, preserving my chastity for over ten years.

Even excluding when we were too young, I was definitely the odd one.

“…….”

…But I never thought my hymen was that important.

Sure, losing it to a toy would’ve been unpleasant, but if fate decreed it, I’d have accepted it.

Do men feel differently about it?

Lost in these small questions, I pushed off the ground lightly with my foot.

“…That rut you mentioned last time. Is this what you meant?”

Whether he was copying me

or it was just the instinct of someone on a swing,

Seo Woo-jin, swaying in rhythm with me, asked quietly.

“Mostly. Not 100%, but… 70%.”

“Did you fight with your boyfriend? …No, you two always seemed fine whenever I saw you.”

“…Well.”

From what I felt at the pension, it might just be that he has a lower libido—the opposite of you.

…Or maybe Baek Ji-ho lacks confidence in his body.

Especially since I reacted weirdly once and made it worse.

There were many possible reasons, but none were things I could share openly.

So, as usual, I tried to give a vague answer, but—

“If it’s erectile dysfunction, I can treat it. I’d rather not—it’d gross me out—but what can you do? Just think of it as waxing…”

“…….”

“Ah, if it’s psychological, like stress or trauma, I can’t help with that.”

Because he sounded unexpectedly serious,

I fiddled with the Coke can for a while before answering.

“…It’s not that.”

A bad guy with a good side.

The kind of troubled antagonist you see in novels or dramas.

Looking at Seo Woo-jin beside me now, that’s exactly what came to mind.

Not that his actions were excusable.

Again, I didn’t like that he’d propositioned me for sex before.

I didn’t like that he’d come onto Ha-yoon’s younger sister.

I really didn’t like that he’d half-threatened me today after running into me and finding my weakness.

And I didn’t like that he’d gotten hard while touching me earlier.

But his consultation request…

…The things I’d heard at the pension.

And even after confirming I was a vir…gin, he’d sighed deeply and handed me my clothes.

As I’d thought earlier,

while forgiveness was impossible, understanding why was possible.

He’s just a natural-born pervert who occasionally loses control.

I roughly understood what kind of person Seo Woo-jin was.

“Then what was the problem? Personality differences…? That would’ve caused issues from the start.”

“…….”

“Or… unusual preferences?”

…We both had too many secrets to hide anyway.

Rather than sharing them with a close friend, someone like this pervert felt more comfortable.

Tilting the can to wet my tongue slightly,

with the sharp carbonation,

“…I made a mistake.”

“A mistake?”

“…This is the first time I’m telling anyone, so if you break this secret, I’ll expose everything. What you did to me, Ji-yoon’s story…”

“You wouldn’t? You’d just ruin your relationship with your boyfriend. I’d be socially crucified.”

“……Sigh… Fine. So, it’s like…”

The story of how I prepared expensive, famous alcohol for my boyfriend’s birthday.

How we got drunk and things got heated.

How, right before we were about to do it for the first time, I reacted strangely.

…In other words, the story of how he was a little smaller than average.

How he lost his erection because of it, and things ended awkwardly.

How after that, anything sexual became like Voldemort in Harry Potter.

The story I couldn’t tell my parents or friends, I shared for the first time

with Seo Woo-jin, sitting on the swing, speaking calmly.

Luckily, no one passed by, so I could say it all without interruption.

Fortunately, Seo Woo-jin didn’t laugh at my story.

At most, he swayed lightly on the swing, creak, squeak,

then asked,

“That time you asked me what men like—was that why?”

“…What, is that weird?”

“No, not weird. Just… …Ah, so that’s why you were sleeping in the living room that time. Too awkward to share a bed.”

“That was… really because he was snoring.”

“Ah.”

He let out a short laugh and fell silent.

After finishing my story, I sipped the Coke, feeling like I wanted to learn how to smoke.

People say sharing secrets makes you feel lighter. Trying it, I realized that was a complete lie.

Far from feeling relieved, I was just embarrassed. Probably something people who love hearing secrets made up.

…Still.

I didn’t entirely hate it.

After months of suffering alone,

it felt okay to ask this guy bluntly, like usual.

“…Hey. Seo Woo-jin.”

“Yeah.”

“I know it was my fault, but… …Is it really that shocking? Being surprised because it’s smaller than expected.”

“Hard to say. But of course, it’d feel bad. Might even be a complex.”

“I know, but…”

Then again, this guy’s never been laughed at for something like that, so he wouldn’t get it.

Seeing no point in this line of questioning, I sighed.

Maybe I should’ve just asked more bluntly what men like, like last time…

Right. We were both holding bombs anyway.

Just revealing one piece of information we knew about each other would be fatal, so there was no need to hold back now.

So after agonizing, just as I was about to ask Seo Woo-jin a few things,

he glanced at me and spoke first.

“Since we’re here, I should probably tell you something too.”

“…What?”

“A secret of mine. I’m still seeing sex partners, by the way.”

“…? What, you—trash…”

“You already expected it, right?”

“…I figured there were about four?”

“That’s the image you had of me? Well, not four.”

“So more than one, at least.”

“I’ll keep that part a secret. The moment I say it, you’ll probably run to tell my sister.”

“…I’m not an idiot. Why would I? Then you’d tell Baek Ji-ho I tried to buy a 9-inch dildo—”

“Right. I’d be socially ruined, and your relationship with your boyfriend would be destroyed.”

“That’s the same as what I just said. Why even…”

“Just confirming. …Anyway, in that spirit, I have a question for you, Seol Da-bin.”

Maybe I should’ve installed a tracking app when I met him last time.

Thinking that, as I was about to dump the rest of my Coke like Seo Woo-jin had,

the sound of clinking chains came from beside me.

Turning my head, I saw Seo Woo-jin approaching.

One swing still swaying lightly on its own.

It would’ve been rude to dump the Coke in front of the person who gave it to me, so,

as usual, I furrowed my brows slightly and looked up at him.

“Since we’re already like this… …What’s the harm in making a few more secrets?”

“…Depends on the secret.”

“Depends on…”

“…….”

“There’s one way to solve both our consultations at the same time. Want to hear it?”

“Consultations…? …You mean your libido, and what men like…”

“Yeah, that.”

“…How would that even…”

“It’s simple. If you and I become sex partners, that’s it.”

“…?! I—I don’t need that kind of—”

Hearing Seo Woo-jin’s