episode_0224

With a brief clash of lips, Edan looked at me with a strange gaze. It seemed like he didn’t quite understand what had just happened.

Seeing my flushed face, he seemed to realize that he had been kissed. It was such a brief moment of contact that he couldn’t hide his confusion.

“…I-is this… considered an answer?”

“….”

“I apologize for not being able to persuade you with words. I couldn’t convince Edan Doyeon-nim with my eloquence, so I had no choice but to resort to this action.”

Nevertheless, if this kind of action wasn’t enough for Edan to understand, then who in the world would boldly kiss a man who showed no interest?

Not to mention, apart from Edan, no one had ever experienced a kiss with Release’s body. …Strictly speaking, not even in my past life, but that’s a story for another time.

I thought that Edan might release his grip on my arms and legs at this point, but sadly, his hold on me only tightened, turning into a more suffocating pressure.

“Edan Doyeon-nim? Could you please release me now?”

“…Not yet.”

“…What?”

“Last time, Release said that a kiss was nothing special. Surely you remember what she said back then?”

…Oh, right, she did say something like that.

The image of my past self, who boldly behaved despite saying that a kiss was nothing special, naturally came to mind. What kind of arrogance led me to blurt out such words?

“Th-there’s no way that’s true!”

“Is that so?”

“D-did you really think of me as a crazy woman who would kiss anyone without a second thought?! What I said back then was just… well, to not burden Edan Doyeon-nim…”

“It doesn’t matter why Release said those things. What I’m saying is, this is still not enough.”

“…What?”

“Open your mouth, Release.”

“Ugh?!”

In a reflexive response to Edan’s words, I slightly opened my mouth, and his face tilted at a 45-degree angle as he covered my lips from top to bottom.

It was a slightly deeper kiss than the one we had shared before, almost like a French kiss. Well, strictly speaking, it felt even more intense than the kiss we had shared back then. While the previous kiss had stopped as Edan’s tongue entered my mouth, this kiss sealed my lips completely.

Edan’s thick tongue explored my mouth as if it were his own private space, moving inside me.

-Smack, smack.

“Ugh?! Mm, mm…!”

-Smack, smack, smack.

“Mm, mm… Mm, mm…!”

Inside my lips, along my gums, inside my cheeks, behind my teeth, the tip of my tongue, underneath my tongue.

The sensation of Edan pressing his soft flesh against mine from various angles made me feel completely overwhelmed.

In a way, it was a kiss so intense that it was almost like sex. It was as if he was inserting something long and slender into a hole to exchange bodily fluids, making me wonder if it was real sex.

Even after spending almost a minute kissing, Edan showed no sign of letting go, so I had no choice but to make a decision.

-Swish.

“Mm, ah…!”

-Swish, slurp…

“Ugh, ah… Mm…!”

I kept thinking that maybe I was causing Edan to be flustered by avoiding his tongue, so I decided to just go along with his intense kiss as he wanted.

Although he tried to push his tongue in because he thought just a simple kiss on the lips wasn’t enough, I knew he wouldn’t keep holding me like this until tomorrow morning.

I figured that if I just went along with what he wanted, sharing our lips and tongues like this, he would probably be satisfied and let go on his own.

I didn’t do it because I wanted to indulge Edan’s stubborn behavior. All I wanted was for this uncomfortable moment to end a little sooner.

In the midst of worrying that I might lose my innocence, I felt relieved that it seemed to end with just sharing the inside of our lips.

…And so, about 3 minutes passed since we shared each other’s lips.

While we were using our lips and tongues to share sensations, a strange sensation that I couldn’t put into words pulled me from just below my neck.

-Slurp, slurp.

“Uh, huh?!”

…What, what was that just now? That sensation?

Even though we had only shared a kiss with our lips touching, I suddenly felt a strange sensation rising from below my body, causing me to feel flustered.

I wondered if Edan had taken the opportunity to touch my body in the confusion, but his hands were still holding my wrists and he didn’t even flinch, so I couldn’t figure out the cause of that stimulating sensation that felt like it was coming from my body.

‘I felt a similar sensation when Edan touched my chest…’

As I couldn’t understand why I felt that sensation for a moment, Edan’s tongue briefly stopped and licked my palate up and down, and as I belatedly realized the cause of that strange sensation, I engaged in the intense kiss again.

-Slurp, slurp.

“Uh, uh….”

-Smack, smack.

“Uh, uh….”

Engaging in the act of sharing saliva using our lips and tongues again, I focused on my thoughts, but that lewd sensation from before began to stir in my mind again.

-Drip.

‘How long is he planning to do this…’

Despite feeling flustered by the sensation that felt like it was wetting somewhere other than my mouth, Edan still had his face pressed close to mine. With his lips almost burying my back of the head in the soft bed, I couldn’t escape.

Just as I thought about whether he would keep our lips locked like this until tomorrow morning, Edan’s lips slowly began to part from mine, and as we separated after a long time, a lewd fluid symbolizing the intense kiss just now stretched between us like a thin thread.

“…Ha, ha, ha….”

“……”

“…Are, are you satisfied now?”

“……”

It was a subtle expression. It seemed like the anger that was there before had dissipated, but there was still a lingering expression.

And even as I looked at that expression, I was still just as flustered. If it were the Edan I knew, he would have let go of me by now, but for some reason, today’s Edan felt a bit more persistent.

“…Um, I feel like you might have some strange misunderstandings, so I want to clarify.”

“……”

“As I mentioned before, I have never kissed anyone other than Edan Do-ryun until now.”

“…I know, alright.”

“In other words, it means that the person who currently comes closest to my heart is you, Edan. Even after I have expressed this much, do you still need proof?”

“…”

Edan, who simply blushed and looked at me without saying a word, made me feel uncomfortable with his gaze. It was inevitable to feel burdened by his gaze.

His expression seemed to be in conflict, as if he wanted to say something. But at least in this situation, it’s probably better to assume that he doesn’t have any intention of genuinely assaulting me…

Fortunately, as I had anticipated, Edan listened to my sincerity, and he began to gradually release the grip on my hand that he had held onto, slowly moving away the body that had been pressing me down aggressively.

“Sorry, Lillis.”

“…”

“I… I kept having strange thoughts because I couldn’t control myself. Even though I know in my head that you wouldn’t leave me for someone else because you want me, I still ended up doubting you again.”

“No, it’s okay.”

“Sorry for making you worry needlessly when you’re tired. I know that if I keep doing this kind of thing, it will scare you, but I couldn’t control myself in that moment.”

“…”

‘I couldn’t control myself in that moment’…

Well, that wasn’t exactly a great apology. By making such excuses, it seemed like it was implying that similar incidents could happen again in the future.

However, Edan’s attitude, which had suddenly attacked me and could have easily crossed a line, seemed quite strange today.

Until now, he hadn’t exhibited behaviors that I disliked to the point of being almost obsessive. So, it was a bit strange for him to suddenly change so radically.

‘Wait, come to think of it…’

When was the last time I had satisfied Edan’s sexual desires?

The last memory was probably towards the end of last semester. I had silently gone out without telling Edan, which made him angry, and the punishment he received from Edan was the last memory.

Excluding that, the last thing I had done for Edan was the ‘reward’ I had given him in the bathroom after he had won against Harold for the first time.

Thinking about it like this, I couldn’t help but have this thought. Perhaps Edan’s sudden attack on me was not just due to his pent-up sexual desires exploding all at once.

The person he loved the most and his temporary lover were sharing the same bed every night.

Not only were we sharing the same bed, but we were also sharing the same space. We were living in such close proximity that, even though we were trying our best not to make each other uncomfortable, we would occasionally witness each other changing clothes or be seen doing so unintentionally, living together with Edan and me. And this was happening every day, regardless of weekdays or weekends.

Although there was a winter break in between, we had been living this way for almost half a year. Perhaps Edan’s behavior was also partly due to my negligence in not paying attention to him. I didn’t mean to, but I had essentially tormented Edan in the closest way possible for almost half a year.

His sudden attack on me was probably also partly due to the fact that I had not satisfied his desires to some extent. If I had let Edan touch my chest even once in the past six months, I wouldn’t have had to suddenly imagine that he might leave me for a hero.

‘…In the end, I have to take responsibility.’

On a day like today, I managed to suppress my desires halfway and decided to just let it go, knowing that there was a possibility of a bigger backlash coming later.

Furthermore, there was also a chance of a serious incident occurring if I continued to ignore it, so I had to let it out at least once to prevent such a thing from happening.

Initially, the reason I hadn’t rewarded Edan recently wasn’t because his skills had deteriorated or anything like that. It was simply because my standards for the rewards I wanted to give him had become higher.

So even if I were to give him a slightly delayed reward at this point, Edan wouldn’t have found it strange. …Probably.

“It’s not like I’m allowing Edan because I want to….”

I was simply trying to comfort Edan, who was suffering from sexual frustration, and prevent any potential disasters that could arise from that frustration.

There was absolutely no personal desire involved in my actions towards him.