episode_0208

The kangaroo pajamas Jimin bought me. At some point, they became my pajamas and I just wore them.

Honestly, except when I was going to the bathroom, it was comfortable so there was no reason to nitpick.

I sat down on a sofa that was as soft as a bed, just like its appearance.

I took the blanket from the room, wrapped it around my shoulders, and sat up straight, but my body was gradually collapsing.

I didn’t even try to support my collapsing body, so I rested my head on the armrest at the end of the sofa and pulled the blanket over my body.

“… Ah.”

I shouldn’t do this. Wouldn’t that make me look like a glutton? While thinking that, somehow I felt more comfortable this way, so I moved the joystick in my hand without thinking.

Although it was a game that I saw the ending of on a computer, I only saw the complete ending, and after that, I turned off the game after seeing only the king die, so I became curious about what would happen next, so I searched through the menu and turned on the game to see what would happen next.

Click. The button was pressed, and I looked across the screen at the world I had lived in until recently.

In fact, I wouldn’t have had the courage to press something like this, but the reason I was able to press it was probably because of Jimin’s explanation.

The goddess who had drawn me and Jimin in had now lost her powers, and since I had powers similar to those of an operator in that world, I could touch her with a little more peace of mind.

I wondered what happened to Kylon, who I had previously granted powers to. I was curious about what happened after that.

I saw the king die, and the nobles, soldiers, and nuns who were involved died afterward, but I remember turning it off because I just thought, “Oh, he’s dead. He’s dead…” rather than feeling a sense of relief because I was watching it through the screen.

A sigh escaped me.

I left Jimin behind to take out the trash for a moment and started playing the game quietly, and the story continued from where I had left off.

I was just a bystander there, not a character.

*

Golden flames covered the earth.

The flames burned mines, they burned the Demon King, but they did not burn people.

Where in the world is there a hotter fire than that? Where in the world is there a warmer fire than that?

The flames that were burning around the saint consumed the saint, and with that power, they were able to devour the demon king.

But the Demon King stubbornly survived and rose from the flames.

Ta-dak, ta-dak, the golden flames burned the Demon King’s skin, but there was a being that overcame it and stood.

It was a giant monster.

The overflowing magic was enough to strike fear into those around them.

The saint sacrificed herself and is no longer in this world.

Linda relaxed her fist, now that she realized there was no hope.

Agnes dropped her sword, exhausted and weak.

Flora looked bewildered. What she thought was the last knife was gone.

And Kylon opened his blue eyes and tried to think of a way.

What should I do next? I thought Veronica would win right away, but it wasn’t like that. I made a sacrifice, but the moment I faced the next one, my mind went blank.

At that moment when my breath was trembling, at that moment when Veronica disappeared and my last hope, the dagger disappeared, an unknown sparkle descended from somewhere.

Light was shining down on Kylon.

The rain has stopped. The clouds created by the Demon King have also cleared.

The red lightning died down, and a hole opened up between them, allowing light to pour in and engulf Kylon.

The heavens were split open, and he was chosen. That was what it seemed to be.

Needless to say, Kaylon was chosen by the goddess again, granted power, and with that power, defeated the Demon King.

That was just the story.

It’s all over.

The crisis was averted thanks to the saint’s sacrifice and the warrior being chosen again.

When everything was over, all that was left was to return, but there was no one who could return easily.

Kylon stared blankly into space.

But all that was left there was the Demon King’s remains, disintegrating into dust in the fading flames.

Now, let’s go back, I told her, but in the end, she disappeared like a spark until the very end, and the sense of loss I felt was indescribable.

Parsac.

The victory was sweet, but the loss was bitter.

And yet, he had won, and the sunlight was shining down on him to celebrate the winner.

Now it was time to turn back, and the warrior had to gather his thoughts.

“… It’s over.”

Defeated the Demon King.

“… It’s over, but this is… ”

When she was feeling so depressed, Flora saw Mine’s body collapsing and said, “Oh no,” and quickly ran to Kylon.

“Kaillon…Kaillon… ”

But Flora couldn’t bring herself to say it was okay, and just kept her mouth shut because she wanted to comfort her but couldn’t.

Knowing full well that there was nothing I could say to comfort Kaylon who had suffered a loss, I ended up going back that way.

It was a strange sight, as if there would be a thrill and a sense of accomplishment if you caught the Demon King, but none of that existed.

The world became peaceful. The world was maintained because special beings took special actions.

And the credit went to the warrior, and the status of the goddess was raised high.

The way back is a bit trudging.

I think back to the time I spent starting from the Holy Land and coming here.

And when they boarded the carriage back to the Holy Land, Linda bit her lip and then mumbled at Kylon.

“… I’m sorry.”

It was an apology she had made before, but it was on her lips again.

I couldn’t help but say that because I realized with all my heart what I almost did, what I did, and what it almost caused.

I felt so guilty that I couldn’t say anything more.

After that, Agnes and Flora remained silent, just mourning Veronica, who had been burned to death along with the Demon King.

At those words, Kylon laughed bitterly.

“… It’s okay. This time, it was something Veronica chose herself.”

Kylon wanted to respect Veronica’s choice.

I said so because I wanted to think that the method was not in vain.

People tend to change their minds at will, but it’s rare for them to change their minds after they’ve said something.

It is a sacrifice. It is a sacrifice that buys time for the warrior to be chosen again and gain power.

I could say that.

It had to be that way. As he thought that, his body began to glow, glow, glow several times.

Because of that, the eyes of Linda, Agnes, and Flora, who were in the same carriage, opened wide.

As I focused my gaze on him to see what was going on, Kylon waved his hands in the air in surprise.

What is revealed after that is the single phrase floating in the status window, “I am loved by the goddess.”

“… Me?”

Not everyone knew what he meant, but Kylon smiled bitterly as if there was no reason for him to do so.

A smile appeared.

In that moment of overflowing divinity received from the Goddess, the Goddess looked at Kylon.

“What’s going on…?”

Agnes asked cautiously, and Flora closed her mouth tightly and concentrated to hear the answer.

Then Kylon simply shrugged his shoulders and replied.

“I guess he just got stronger after defeating the Demon King.”

“Really? That’s good. I knew something would happen… ”

Agnes said with an embarrassed expression, and Kylon just smiled and replied that it was okay.

“When I get back…what are you going to do first?”

“Yeah. Nothing has been decided yet.”

Kylon groaned in response to Agnes’ question, really just wondering what to do.

What followed was Flora’s voice.

“Ah, that… Do you want to go find some magic materials with me?”

It was a word that came out of my mouth as I was worried that I might be separated from you and become separated forever.

I knew from the beginning that even if I let myself down, I would have nothing to say.

I followed you to the end to atone for my sins because I had that much karma, but now that I’m trying to atone for my sins by breaking up with you, I feel so bad that I can’t do it.

As everyone listened with bated breath to hear his answer, a breath was sucked in through Kaylon’s mouth.

At the same time, the answer came out.

“Is that so?”

Kylon had already half-forgiven those who had risked their lives in the battle against the Demon King, blocking the area and standing in opposition.

And at the end, the world will be at peace, and there will be no other goals. It will be powerless. I readily agreed to the idea of having another goal.

Because I thought that the relationship could be fixed at any time.

*

I read the script absentmindedly.

It didn’t matter who wrote it or who wrote the explanation.

I just knew what that character, that being called Kylon, was thinking and saying.

“What, you’re doing that again?”

“Oh, surprise!”

I was so startled by Jimin’s voice that I almost threw the joystick away.

I was so surprised that my heart started pounding.

“Ma, come in and say something… ”

“No, we live together in this house, so you have to talk to me before you come in… ?”

“Oh, no, that’s not it.”

I swallowed my words as I remembered that I had blurted out words without thinking because I was so surprised.

And then I pulled myself together again and got my posture right, and I felt a little sore.

I sat up straight on the sofa and pressed the button again.

The script, which went beep, beep, was soon revealing through dialogue that Kylon was planning to go on another trip with Linda, Agnes, and Flora.

Then it was Jimin who reacted to it.

“… Huh, forgiveness? You chose to forgive?”

“No? I didn’t choose it. We’re just kids talking to each other.”

“Oh, really? … I didn’t know you could forgive me.”

“But I guess that’s because you did a good job and didn’t do anything weird until you got to the place where you fought the Demon King?”

“… Hmm.”

“Or maybe that’s the original personality of the game’s Kylon.”

“I don’t know.”

Actually, like Jimin said, I don’t know either.

Because it wasn’t a world I created, and it wasn’t a character I created.

I hope so even more. Even if this story flows on in a direction I don’t know about, I hope you’ll be happy.

“Me too.”

As I chuckled like that, Jimin looked at me with his eyebrows furrowed.

“But he’s also a Kylon, why did you give him to the kids? I don’t think he’s saying it’s okay to cheat.”

Jimin must have been really upset that a character that looked exactly like him was sent to other kids.

“If it were me, I would have made him live alone for the rest of his life, thinking about Veronica.”

I laughed bitterly at those words.

Because that sounded a little cruel.

“But he’s not ‘yes’.”

“?”

“He’s Kylon, you’re you.”

Honestly, they look the same. They even used the same name for a month.

But the being inside them was so different that it was difficult to dare say they were the same person.

Yeah, I didn’t love ‘Kylon’.

I just liked the existence of ‘you’.

What I sent to those kids was ‘Kailon’, not you.

“Because you’re by my side, I want to make sure that Kylon, who was temporarily indebted to me, doesn’t get lonely.”

“… … or something like that.”

“Can I stop looking at this now?”

“I guess so.”

At those words, I pressed the button a few times to turn off the conversation.

When I returned to the game selection screen, I sighed.

There was no reason to watch anymore. Whether it really had a happy ending or not was now only known to the parties involved.

I let go because I knew that just because I covered up a story, it wouldn’t mean that the story didn’t end, and that the story would go on without me.

He reached out and placed the joystick he was holding on the table.

After that, I turned my gaze to the side.

Next to it is a figure that looks like Kylon, but it is not Kylon.

He was there.

The only person I love so much.

Even if they look the same and have the same name, there is nothing that can replace him.

So I smiled because I loved him so much, the one and only one who couldn’t be replaced.

At the bashful laughter, Jimin just looked at me quietly and made a subtle expression.

“Why? Is it bad that Kylon in the game meets another woman?”

“What, we’re on the same level, but it seems like you’re cheating.”

“It’s okay. You’re here.”

“… That’s true, but.”

“I’m here too.”

“… … .”

I accepted Jimin’s lips as he approached me without saying a word.

At this point, I’m starting to think that this might be an addiction, but if you say that this is Jimin addiction and Minhee addiction, then that feels good in its own way.

Because I felt like we couldn’t live without each other.

Say you love them, express it with your body even if you don’t say it, and hug them repeatedly.

“Hehe.”

“Um… .”

After exploring each other’s mouths like that, they tried to catch their breath, which had gotten a little faster.

Jimin raised the corners of his mouth as he leaned his body against the back of the sofa and fixed his poor bangs.

“But, you already took out the blanket to become a hikikomori?”

“No, it’s cold… ”

“Your posture just now was definitely that of a hikikomori.”

“… Actually, I’m an applicant.”

“No, you said you’d do a lot of things with me.”

“I’m an applicant, but I guess I have to give up… Ah.”

Jimin fluttered the blanket I was covering myself with and came inside.

As we shared a blanket and draped it over our shoulders, his left shoulder pressed up against my right shoulder.

There was a brief silence.

“Do you want to play a game with us?”

So I broke the silence and asked him, and he groaned for a moment and then nodded.

“Is that so?”

At those words, I shook off the blanket, got up from the sofa, and took out a joystick from one of the drawers.

Then he connected the wire and put it in his hand.

“What game do you play?”

“Yeah. Isn’t there anything fun?”

At Jimin’s muttering, I hummed and groaned before carefully responding.

“How about this?”

“Okay.”

It was a game where you could simply see the world and go on adventures.

The fact that two people can play was a big advantage.

I thought it was good because there was no intervention from other characters, so there was nothing to worry about.

Time passed like that.

The characters have spent a lot of time moving from place to place.

And I, too, shared many emotions with Jimin.

I felt the excitement of seeing something new, the joy of doing something funny, the sadness of hearing a sad story, and the regret of not being able to eat an important item.

It wasn’t a game, but it was clear that we would face different emotions many times as we lived together in the future.

Suddenly, I remembered what I said while playing the game.

I will die so that he doesn’t have to suffer anymore, so that I can take his place.

I will die as many times as I can until I win.

Can we say we’ve won now?

If you hold me and I hold you, can I confidently say that it is a victory?

If that’s true, I’d say I don’t want to die anymore.

Because you are by my side, having overcome adversity together.

Let’s see spring bloom.

Let’s watch summer roll in.

Let’s watch the leaves fall in autumn.

Let’s see winter fall like snow.

With you, even the seasons that repeat over and over again will always feel new.