episode_0184

‘Just a little more… .’

Everything ends.

The story that began when I fell into this world is reaching its conclusion.

As that thought came to mind, a sincere smile began to spread across my face.

‘It really took a long time.’

The wooden sword comes down with a thud.

Immediately afterwards, a burst of light appears.

One line, two lines.

My eyes squinted as the light began to burst forth as if it were going to consume the world.

I tried to resist it by closing my eyes and not looking at the light.

But, is that why I closed my eyes?

With nothing but darkness left in my vision, old memories began to surface in my head.

Even though those memories were something I had wrapped up tightly and prevented from ever coming out again, they were a past I really didn’t want to remember… .

I thought that this would be a kind of revolving lantern that I would see on my last day, so I thought it wouldn’t be bad to experience it at least once.

The first memory that comes to mind is the day of the crash.

Or the day of beginning.

The first thing I saw when I came to my senses was the ugly stares in people’s eyes.

Locked inside us. Their eyes looked as if they were looking at strangely shaped livestock.

However, back then, I was so stupid that I didn’t even notice the malice in those eyes.

Well, I still think there’s nothing I can do…

When I came to my senses, I was in a place I had never seen before, surrounded by people dressed in unusual attire. How could I come to my senses?

The rest is a predictable story.

What could they do to me, a frail woman, who knew nothing about ethics in a place where ethics were stuck in the Middle Ages or even lower?

Where did they try to capture you and sell you as a slave?

Of course, I ran away from them after barely grasping the situation… .

I can’t say I was completely safe.

Because I was in a state close to misanthropy, I went into the mountains where no one set foot to avoid the dirty hands reaching out towards me.

After that, I escaped from people and went into the mountains. To survive here, I extended my life by pulling out and eating weeds that grew haphazardly.

It was disgustingly bad, but after eating it for a few days, a few months, or a few years, I got used to it.

As time passed and the days when I felt hungry decreased and my hunger subsided, I began to feel greedy, something I had never felt before.

First, I wanted to eat meat.

Since it was a mountainous area, there were many wild animals, so if you could hunt, meat would be the most abundant thing, so in a way, it was a simple but natural desire.

However, I did not have the strength to hunt beasts, and after much thought, I came to the conclusion that I should ‘train my body’.

“Pfft.”

It’s really simple.

If you come to the conclusion that you would rather go down from the mountain and work, you might as well train your body and hunt. There is no such thing as a primitive person.

Thinking back now, it was a really good choice.

Well, that’s what I chose.

The structure of the bow was so complex that I, who had no knowledge, could not make it.

The only thing that came to mind that could be made by carving wood was a sword.

After choosing to train with a sword, I devoted myself to training to the point where my sense of time became distorted.

Afterwards, when I was able to protect my body to some extent, I began to wonder a question I had never thought of before.

‘Why am I here?’

It was a question I had never thought of, as I had been so focused on survival. After much thought, I came to one conclusion.

‘I came into the novel I had read.’

The problem was that it was a conclusion only a psychopath would come to, but what could you do?

My stupid brain couldn’t interpret this situation at all, and the only memories I had before coming here were of novels I read one day.

So, like it or not, once I reached that conclusion, my thoughts grew even faster.

And this is a story we all know.

I was naturally timid and fearful, so when I thought of the world I lived in as a novel, I felt like I couldn’t do anything.

In this world, if I, the only impurity, do something wrong and something goes wrong, I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep.

Well… Actually, this was also a delusion.

That is also close to a psychological victory.

I justified myself by hiding in the mountains to hide things I didn’t want to remember, and made up a plausible reason why I was dropped here, hoping that when it was all over, when this story was finished, I could go back.

“Sigh… .”

It was unpleasant.

These are facts and memories I didn’t want to remember.

But I haven’t opened my eyes yet.

The light that should have been blocked by closing my eyes.

In the present situation where there should be nothing but darkness, a little light is visible.

The light may not have died down yet.

The thoughts flow naturally.

This time, it’s not an old, worn-out memory.

It’s not a memory that makes you frown with discomfort just thinking about it.

‘… That’s when I met you.’

Memories that make you smile just thinking about them continue, and you could even say that they made you a little happy.

A little boy came to the cabin where he lived alone.

Thinking back now, the little boy’s eyes were filled with nothing but emptiness, and somehow I was drawn to him.

It was really bad, but I think I projected myself into those eyes that had a slimy, sticky anger beyond their empty eyes.

So, I guess that’s why I didn’t chase you away even though I had grown to hate people so much.

So, I guess he was trying to talk to you while making excuses.

“… That’s right.”

A guilty smile and thoughts follow.

That day, a shabby-looking little boy asked me to accept him as my disciple.

At first, I thought about refusing.

You see, I thought I was a coward and not the type of person who would be a teacher to anyone.

That’s because I thought that an ignorant person like me couldn’t be a teacher, a parent, or a world to a little child.

But, but.

“My name is Cheonharang. I will cut down the sky.”

To my absurd words about cutting down the sky.

“Because the goals that Mr. Cheonharang has are similar to the goals that I have.”

The sight of the little boy answering so seriously.

The sight of him also having such a goal tickled a corner of my heart.

So, he took the boy as his disciple.

In order to give him a sense of responsibility, I also gave him the name ‘Cheonmu-myeong’, which was my last name, as he had said he didn’t have a name.

Well, my thoughts about taking responsibility were dashed, and I soon regretted my decision.

I have a weak body and mind, so can I be a true teacher, parent, or even a world to this child?

So I regretted it.

I regret not accepting you as my disciple.

but.

After a while, I changed my mind.

This time too, it was not by oneself, but with the help of an anonymous person.

Seeing the nameless eyes that had been empty and filled with light after becoming my disciple, my thoughts changed.

Unlike me, who still harbored only emptiness, I tried to change my thoughts when I saw you harboring hope.

It was the first time that I, who was always in a hurry to run away, had a little courage.

So, although it is not a grand one, it is one of the small connections that will pass by this child.

If it were written as a novel, I would like to be a supporting character who would write a line or so when recalling the past. I thought that I could do that too.

So, I just wanted you, the main character of this story, to monologue, ‘I had a truly wonderful teacher who was with me during my childhood.’

Yeah, I wanted to be your supporting actor.

Not the final boss who threatens the world by blocking the warrior’s path in such a grand way as now.

What I’m saying is that I wanted to be a supporting actor who would be written just one line in this child’s life.

I wanted this little boy to have a brief rest stop.

Anonymous. I promised myself not to be a worm, not to be a bad influence on you.

Although, I may not be good enough to sacrifice my body to save the world.

I decided not to become such a bad person that I would torment you, a little child who had lived a miserable life.

But, what do I look like now?

“… How dirty and ugly.”

Aren’t you a damn villain who drove your disciple to the brink of death for your own selfish desires?

I opened my closed eyes and faced the light.

In the brilliant light, I see the figure of my disciple bleeding.

“Ah.”

What I want is clear….

“… This wasn’t it.”

The strength left my grasp.

As the sword fell, a few drops of water fell down my face.

I wanted to run out there right now and stop you.

I wanted to stop you right now, as you were trying your best to grant my request while breathing heavily as if it was difficult.

I really wanted to stop you from becoming the villain in this story by following your foolishly ignorant teacher.

I wanted to right something that was wrong.

I just wanted to stop this situation from rushing towards the wrong ending of the story.

No, I had to stop.

If only to protect what I first decided and what I first had the courage to do.

If only to be honest with myself, if only to be honest with your teacher, if only to make the world right and let you live with honor, then I had to stop.

That’s when I realized.

“That’s what it was… .”

I’m not trying to fix your world.

I don’t have these feelings just for you.

I wanted to set my world straight.

“Puhhhh… That’s what happened.”

I have decided to become your teacher, your parent, and your world.

You taught me, you brought me warmth, you became my world.

“It was simple from the start.”

Why did I have to take such a complicated route?

“Anonymous. If only you could be happy.”

I also had no more wishes.