episode_0173

“So, who is it?”

At Kyua’s interjection, Juhee sunbae also glanced in my direction.

“What do you mean?”

“Oh, you know what I’m asking. It’s about who you’re going to choose.”

“….”

I didn’t expect her to ask so directly.

“I don’t know anything.”

Bluntly replying, I ignored Kyua, and Juhee sunbae seemed to think it wasn’t her place to intervene and just let it go.

“How can I help?”

“Just… I’ll talk to each of them one by one. Just make sure no one else comes near.”

With my determined answer, Juhee sunbae nodded.

Thump.

She patted my back.

“I know it’s tough.”

A kind smile and comfort from Juhee sunbae, which I rarely see.

“But it’s the right thing to do. I’m proud of you for making the right choice. Thank you for not making me regret liking you.”

“Sunbae…”

“After the MT. I don’t know who it will be, but let’s have a drink with your girlfriend.”

I just forced a smile at her words and didn’t reply separately.

Can I really choose someone?

I probably won’t be a selfish person until the end.

* * *

I said I would make time separately, but in reality, it was harder than I thought to have separate time at the MT.

It was difficult to sneak away among the crowd of people.

And since I had a tendency to gather people around me, even if one person was missing, it was noticeable.

“It’s awkward.”

So, without doing anything properly, time just passed.

After the soccer tournament.

I decided to prepare dinner even though I didn’t do anything separately.

The planning was done by Juhee sunbae, and I was just doing odd jobs.

“I remember the festival.”

There were various incidents during the festival, so the memories were still vivid, but it had been quite a while since then.

And our relationships had changed a lot since then.

“What are you doing?”

Since grilling meat was a must at the MT, a voice came from beside me as I lit the barbecue grill.

It was Choi Isu.

“Weren’t you resting with the others?”

I heard that you were bothered by the professors earlier, so I wondered why you were here.

“I need help preparing dinner. It’ll take a long time if I ask only the first-year students.”

“It’s okay because Juhee sunbae is here.”

“I can’t just leave it to sunbae.”

Even though she said that, she didn’t leave my side.

Choi Isu, who had been standing next to me, asked again while I was lighting the fire.

“Grilling meat?”

“Yeah, since I missed the soccer tournament, I thought I should do something like this.”

“Pork belly?”

“Not that. Just grilling meat.”

“I remember the festival.”

It seemed like we had the same thought.

Choi Isu, who had been standing next to me, poked my side and asked.

“Are you not going to explain?”

“….Juhee sunbae?”

“Yeah.”

She was staring at me intently.

I explained as neutrally as possible, trying not to seem too strange.

“I received a confession and rejected it. That’s really the end of it.”

“Yeah, I know. But I hoped you would come and tell me first.”

“I made a mistake.”

Unlike Yuarin, who couldn’t accept it emotionally right away, Choi Isu was different.

Since our personalities were different, the way to deal with them had to be different too.

“I’m sorry.”

After honestly apologizing, Choi Isu, who had been staring at me, casually placed her hand on the grill.

She was checking if the heat was rising.

In the meantime, I looked around for a moment.

Since the grill had to be outside, there was no one around, but someone could come at any moment.

It was an inappropriate place for a conversation, but…

“Hey, let’s set up the table, guys.”

Juhee sunbae’s voice leading the others could be heard.

I turned my head slightly, and Senior Juhee deliberately made the kids set the table first so they wouldn’t come this way.

Meeting Senior’s eyes, I nodded my head and took a deep breath calmly.

I was prepared, but when it came down to it, the words didn’t come out.

But I knew I had to.

“Yiseo.”

Tap, tap.

Adjusting to the burning charcoal, I whispered softly.

“Let’s stop.”

I couldn’t understand the meaning.

Even I felt heavy-hearted speaking those words, but I knew it was something that needed to be said.

“….”

A concise statement.

I thought I would hear some resentment.

I was prepared to be scolded.

However, she didn’t show much of a reaction.

There was no response.

Was she too shocked to answer properly?

Or was she already prepared for this situation?

Choi Yiseo, calm and composed.

What would her response be?

Anxiously waiting for her, my heart pounding.

“Right now, you are.”

Calmly.

No different from the usual Choi Yiseo.

She confesses her inner thoughts.

“Am I in love with Kim Woojin?”

With just that one word.

It felt like a huge rock was stuck in my throat.

I couldn’t even breathe properly, feeling suffocated. My tongue felt heavy and wouldn’t move.

“Recently. I suddenly had that thought.”

“….”

“Is my feelings fading? Is that why I have these doubts?”

“Maybe.”

It could only be that.

He was indecisive among several women.

Naturally, feelings could fade.

Even though I was the one who suffered from the breakup, it was me who felt the pain.

That I had disappointed Choi Yiseo.

In fact, more than anything, it hurt deeply.

“That’s probably it.”

Even so, I affirmed.

In the end, I couldn’t give Choi Yiseo the answer she wanted. It was better to think it was good, smile, and turn my head.

Before I knew it, Choi Yiseo was looking at me intently, smiling.

“People who straddle both sides have a certain characteristic.”

I was prepared to listen quietly.

The complaints mixed with resentment were naturally mine.

But.

Why was she smiling so happily?

“He constantly confessed his love. He said there was no one but you, as if brainwashing.”

“What are you trying to say?”

Unable to read the flow of the conversation, I asked, and Choi Yiseo smiled with a mischievous smile, nodding her head.

“The opposite?”

“….”

“You have never. No, you have never told me or us that you love us.”

But she continued.

“So I thought about it. You don’t hesitate to mix bodies. You have no patience at all.”

“Ahem.”

The painful truth pierced me.

“Why is that?”

Because it’s Kim Woojin, who is faithful to desire and selfish. That’s the only answer I can give-.

“That’s the only reason.”

Tap.

Choi Yiseo’s finger touched my chest.

After circling around, I finally found the right answer, Choi Yiseo was smiling brightly.

“When you confess with words, it ends, right?”

“….”

“So the only expression you could make was one. When you confess with words, everything becomes clear, but the truth of actions can change in many ways.”

“….”

“Love and desire are different. I said that, but in fact, love includes desire.”

So.

“That’s why you acted faithfully to desire. That was the only way you could express love to us.”

Famous words.

“Packaging love as desire.”

On the contrary.

There was something that could only be expressed through actions, as it ended the moment it was spoken clearly.

That was our relationship.

Confessing love to someone ends it.

That kind of relationship.

“Shall we turn the story around?”

Choi Yiseo’s gaze never once avoided me.

“Let’s stop?”

Her straightforward gaze made me want to run away without even realizing it.

“So you were passionately confessing your love to me?”

“Uh, well… that’s.”

“Hehe, Woojin, do you know that?”

There was only one reason I wanted to run away.

“Your face is turning red. Are you embarrassed?”

“…!”

Yes, I was embarrassed, so I wanted to escape.

Desperately covering my face with my hands.

It was clear that the blushing wasn’t because of the fiery charcoal in front of me.

“You couldn’t say you love me, so you’ve been acting all horny instead.”

As Choi Eiseo took a step closer.

I found myself taking a step back and shouting.

“What’s that? In the end, I couldn’t choose anyone. I’m just a selfish guy. I’m tired of myself. I want to stop now.”

Even though it was a sincere confession.

Choi Eiseo approached me again, grabbed my hand, and pulled me close.

“You’re so selfish, even your consideration is selfish.”

“…”

“I’m sorry, but I’ve already won, I have no intention of losing.”

I was speechless.

I had poured out my heart.

I had said it was too hard.

I had said let’s end it now.

Why was my feelings towards Choi Eiseo growing stronger?

“To be honest, I was worried at first. I thought maybe you were just trying to maintain this situation because you were satisfied with it.”

In Choi Eiseo’s eyes, a sense of relief had filled up without me realizing.

“And that’s not the Kim Woojin that I love.”

She slightly lifted her heel in front of me, placed her hand on my chest, leaned in, and gave me a brief kiss.

Smack.

“Thank you for telling me to stop, Woojin.”

She confessed with a smile towards my blushing face in surprise.

“You’re the Kim Woojin that I love.”