episode_0167

Third Prince Glen Haynes Nifrantz.

This bastard is a sane lunatic.

Even I, who’ve scraped the surface of modern medicine, diagnose him as completely sane, a perfectly normal individual.

But, his personality is so warped that it’s unbelievable he was born into the warm and well-fed royal family.

It’s so bizarre it could be considered a sign of mental illness.

Giving examples would take five sunrises and sunsets, so let’s move on.

Next, the point is…this bastard is the first prince to be nominated as the next heir to the throne.

The reason is nothing special.

It’s simply due to his political skills, projecting his shattered personality like a projector, his smooth-talking ability.

This guy is just naturally gifted at charming people.

He’s so skilled at it that the first person he fooled was himself.

His stomach, bulging out like a hill behind the neighborhood.

He’s built to roll down the stairs if you gave him a little push, yet he firmly believes he has the best looks among his brothers.

And he flaunts it.

Looks are a basic setting; next comes personality and talent, etc. A short conversation with him always ends with him highlighting his own superiority and everyone else’s inferiority.

His greatest skill is divisive politics.

Born the third of six princes, he allied himself with the two older brothers first.

And of course…

He constantly compares the older and younger generations, using his elder brothers’ achievements to gild himself.

He gobbles up everything they’ve put on the table without lifting a finger.

Despite this clear reality, no one challenges him.

He suppresses the lower ranks with power, and wags his tail at those above.

In fact, the first and second princes are content with the current situation and just let it flow. They apparently find it easier to lead on the ground than to follow orders from above.

I’d previously ignored royal internal affairs, but stepping back in, I can’t help but notice. Even if you plug your nose, shit still smells like shit.

But I don’t intend to reprimand him by questioning the succession now. Like his two older brothers, whatever this bastard does, I’ll just protect my wives, my people, and world peace.

So, what I’m about to do is merely my personal revenge.

Fortunately, Glen has a huge weakness.

“Who… are you…?”

A robust physique.

Smooth skin glistening with sweat.

*Hiss- hiss-*

“Y-you don’t know who I am?!”

“Y-yes… I, my feet are cramped and it is difficult to accurately gauge your identity…”

Even buried in flesh, a dick is still a dick.

“Would you… kindly enlighten me…?”

“Hee-hee-hik! Naturally, naturally, I shall-!!”

He’s incredibly weak to women.

. . .

If you ask why I’m so angry, there’s only one answer.

This bastard is the one who spread rumors all over town in my childhood, saying I had no penis.

No further explanation needed.

“E-e-eek… young lady, I have committed a grave offense… Please forgive me…!!”

She fluttered her skirt, bowing deeply with exaggerated movements, conveying her profuse apologies.

Naturally, our sweet Prince Glen couldn’t bear the sight of the lady kneeling on the dirt.

He immediately pulled my arm, helping me up.

“N-no, please don’t…! Anyone can make mistakes, right? I am not such a narrow-minded man as to hold onto something so insignificant, there’s no need to be so flustered. Haha-!!”

Damn it, this is infuriating.

My improvised dialect for a beautiful young noble lady (virgin, I mean) was quite vomit-inducing, but the native quality was something else indeed.

It was just like glistening fat, causing a wave of nausea as if I’d just choked down deep-fried pork belly in butter.

I created thin ether gloves and put them on my hands before grabbing Glen’s pig-like feet and rising to my feet.

An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, and a dick for a dick.

I refined the disgusting speech further, speaking slowly to prevent vomiting.

“Y-young lady… I am deeply moved…!! That the prince, who will shoulder the future of the kingdom, possesses such kindness… I am overwhelmed with emotion…”

“No, no! You don’t have to say that. It’s a natural virtue for someone who will be king! Ha-ha-ha!”

Good, you stupid idiot.

I moved my facial muscles desperately, concealing my disgust and smiling sweetly.

“Come to think of it… I haven’t heard this lovely young lady’s name yet.”

“Oh dear, what a bother… I was so captivated by His Highness’s charm…”

“Ha-ha-ha-it’s perfectly fine; do tell me!”

Business smiles have been second nature since my past life. I maintained a pleasing expression of gratitude, shaking off my clothes and adjusting my posture.

More specifically, I brushed off the area he had just touched.

“My name is… Narias Philbrogue, Your Highness. I am the eldest daughter of a baron who has a small estate in the border region.”

“Narias… Narias…! Such a beautiful name with a resonant sound!”

Hey, you goddamn bastard.

Before, you said the name ‘Narita’ was a lousy name, yet you think ‘Narias’ which includes 2/3 of it has a great resonance?

Beating the living daylights out of you will likely make a sound more resonant given your size.

Hold on, hold on.

I calm myself by counting glass shards in my mind.

One shard, two shards… two shards layered over each other… huh-huh.

Happy imagination naturally brought a smile to my face.

“Your smile, young lady, makes my heart calm and at peace.”

“He-he-hehe- Your Highness’s words are too kind.”

“So, what brings you to this dusty place today? Let me guess.”

Glen stroked his chin in thought.

Or maybe he was stroking his chins.

With such a thick fat layer, you’d never feel the bone, no matter what.

I waited, suppressing my laughter, until he raised his finger and grinned.

“Ah- I got it! Judging by your appearance, you must be a student from the academy, here for a ‘project’?”

“Dear me-“

Ugh! Not at all.

I suppressed my burst of laughter with a natural clap and turned into a naive, smiling girl.

“How did Your Highness recognize it so easily? Your Highness’s eyes are rather sharp!”

“Khaa-ha-ha- That’s nothing! It’s nothing compared to the knowledge you gain through diligent study.”

Even such a long acting performance is bound to be tiresome.

I just realized that because his body was so huge, three soldiers were guarding him, all of them showing signs of growing weariness. One even yawned wide.

Time to move on.

I use my ether membrane to push the air I held in my mouth inwards.

Then, gently rubbing the wall of my stomach, I let out a sound of escaping air from my navel.

*Gurgle—*

Important point!

I clutch my stomach and blush.

“Uh, uh…”

“Oh dear, oh dear. It’s good to be dedicated to your studies, but if you don’t have your meals on time, you’ll fall ill.”

“I-I’m ashamed… Why did my stomach rumble now? Argh— Argh—!”

As I lightly punch my belly, Glen chuckled, finding it cute.

“Khaa-ha-ha-! Don’t do such things to your delicate body. Since you’re hungry, I will treat you to the finest royal cuisine. Hey there—”

He instructed his subordinates to lay down gleaming silk carpets before gently—damn it—taking my hand.

“Do you prefer vegetables or meat?”

. . .

“It’s too delicious, Your Highness~♡”

“Haha-ha- That’s right, that’s right-! It’s pleasing to see you enjoy it.”

“May I have another serving?”

“Of course, don’t ask the obvious! Hey there, get the best quality ingredients, even if I have to burn through this month’s paycheck!”

Soon, the chef, having made food using every available ingredient, was spotted leaving work with his colleagues.

I discreetly give them a thumbs-up, away from Glen’s sight, and they thank me repeatedly, dragging their heavily-filled purses.

The royal servants seem to have noticed I’m a princess, but how come this bastard doesn’t? The reputation of being completely captivated by women must indeed be true.

My mood improved after my full stomach, and I pushed forward with my enjoyable thievery.

“Your Highness, my estate is currently struggling financially. I haven’t been able to acquire any new clothes.”

“Oh dear, don’t worry! Hey there; let’s head to a clothing store next!—”

“His Highness is the best! ♡”

I had a box filled to overflowing, not just for me but for my companions as well, and sent it all back to the manor.

“Even a border region should not forget the king’s children: feeding its people is the king’s duty! Open the royal treasury and send 300 bags of grain immediately to the border regions—!!”

“I am eternally grateful, Your Highness~”

I made sure to grant our fellow villagers who were farming and scratching their bellies quite the generous bonus.

“Hah—Hah— Wha…what would you like next?!”

“I would like to read some books, Your Highness~”

“Your thirst for knowledge is vast! The future of the kingdom is indeed bright—! Hey there—”

I also acquired some books on magic for Nix and Lulu.

“Your Highness, I also work as an adventurer…”

“Go—!! For such a fragile lady to be sent to a harsh forest, we should acquire lots of magical tools and armor—!!”

I also put some magical tools in my bag for Yuri and Aspy.

“As a child, I received a lot of help from the temple…”

“Huuk, huuk…I-I-immediately donate a thousand chests of gold coins to the Aitehr Temple—”

I also sent Tier, the world’s greatest material, ‘money ‘.

After draining him dry until his bones were hollow…

Glen’s face was pale and gaunt, quite a difference from this morning.

“Huuk… Huuk… This much…”

And what’s the reason for showering him with so much money? Surely it’s to sleep with me?

“Y-Young Lady… Uh… Do you have time tonight…?”

But I’ll flatly refuse. This was not a contract, and there’s no guarantee I have to return what I’ve received.

“With all due respect… I have a wife waiting for me at home to make dinner, so I must leave now.”

“Wh-what—!!”

“If you really desire my company…”

“Hee-hiik—?!”

I untied my hair, dispersed the brown mana clumps, and removed the faint perception-dampening magic around my body.

“……?”

“Even in thi-s -cough- appearance…Pfft- if you’re alright with this- Pfft Ha—ha-ha—!! I can’t do this anymore~”

Returning to my actual form, Narita Florain Nifrantz, Glen’s already pale face turned totally white, like blank paper.

“You… You are…”

“I ate well and played well, brother~”

“Youuuuu—!!!!”

Evidently realizing the reality, color returned to his face, turning reddish purple.

He barked orders at the soldiers following him, pointing at me.

“Seize that woman—!!”

“B-but…!!”

“Do you disobey my order—?! Bring that shameless, lewd woman before me—”

Can three ordinary soldiers possibly capture me?

I used the setting sun as a launching pad and leapt into the air, tearing through the clouds, and quickly fled to Baron Philbrogue’s territory.

“You’re wasting your time~”

“Damn—that—bitch—!!”

Relieving my stress feels so good!

I take out a note from my pocket, writing my thanks, and put my hand into the oracle connected to the library.

I give a small wave to the librarian waiting to leave work at the counter and swapped the note for a book. I needed to make sure I fulfilled the reason for my visit to the Royal Palace.

“Aha— that’s what revenge is!”

The sky road was so comfortable, with my arms around the thick book, “”The King’s Qualification.””

Is it because of Glen’s roar echoing in my mind?

It was the best day, all my worries were gone!