episode_0166

“Sisters, are you also on your way to Iunu?”

the pilgrim asked.

Helena and Aria could not answer right away.

An unknown pressure pressed down on my body.

The pilgrim’s behavior was truly bizarre.

Not only was it not enough to cross the eastern no-man’s land without injury, he was rolling a large boulder up to his waist.

I didn’t feel like a superhuman, but I was overwhelmed by the unique atmosphere.

“Yes. Yes.”

Helena answered.

“It turned out well. I met the sisters on the final road. It may be a revelation of light.”

The pilgrim grinned.

“Let’s go together. The highlands are right in front of you.”

He moved towards Iunu again, pushing the boulder.

Helena and Arya were sure.

This person is not a superhuman.

He rolled the boulder, which he could have pushed with one hand, with great difficulty.

So how on earth did we get through this no-man’s land?

*

Helena and Aria just walked.

The pilgrim pushing the stone took the lead a little, and the two followed.

He could have helped, but he didn’t.

This is because Ian’s note said never to touch the pilgrim’s stone.

“Sisters, why did you come to the Holy Land?”

A pilgrim asked while pushing a boulder.

The two had nothing to say in response.

In fact, it is not a holy place, but because we have come to meet him as a pilgrim.

Aria answered appropriately.

“I came in search of faith. I think it would be nice to pray at a holy place.”

“Faith. It’s a good cause. You will get the answer you are looking for.”

The pilgrim answered with a bright smile while pushing the stone.

Iunu is located halfway up the mountain.

That means you have to climb the hill.

“Phew… .”

As expected, the pilgrim who was approaching the hill shook his hands and took a rest.

Helena carefully asked what she had been curious about earlier.

“What is that stone?”

“Oh, you mean this? hmm… .”

The pilgrim looked down at his stone.

“It’s my sin.”

“Sin… ?”

Helena and Aria looked at the stone with blank eyes.

crime.

What should I do? Is this stone a sin?

I thought it was a silly joke, but the pilgrim was extremely serious.

“Yes. Through this, I am atoning for the sins I committed against God in the past.”

The pilgrim who spoke with a smile looked up the hill.

“There is a long way to go. Can I finish talking about it as I go?”

“Yes… .”

The pilgrim pushed the stone again.

The hill was gentle, but it was significantly different from the flat land.

The pilgrim spoke little by little, clearly having more trouble than before.

“Once, I loved God.”

Helena swallowed at those words.

“But, he was not someone who could receive my love. No, a creature like me should not have dared to love the Creator.”

The pilgrim spoke very slowly.

There were times when I stopped to apply force to push the boulders, and there were times when I rested against protruding rocks or tree roots.

“I was so frustrated and angry about that. It was also absurd. I believed that God should embrace all our weaknesses and shortcomings, but he couldn’t accept my love. I hated faith without answers. No matter how much I hoped, my prayers could not be answered by Him.”

No matter how hard you try or hope, you cannot hear the other person’s answer.

It’s all meaningless.

Well, sometimes it feels exhausting and absurd.

Even though it was something he caused.

Aria looked at herself and the pilgrim.

These days, it’s similar to what Aria has been thinking.

A battle that repeats itself constantly.

In the meantime, she worked as a healer, splitting her sleeping time.

It’s tiring and difficult.

There was a limit to holding on, thinking it was atonement for Ian.

Above all, you can’t even hope for forgiveness.

Lately, it’s been difficult at times.

“So… . I ended up blaming God. Since it was an impossible love, I wanted to run away.”

Pausing occasionally to rest and then moving again, the pilgrim talked steadily.

“So I ran away. They turned their backs on him and ran away. I rebelled, wandered, and lived a debauched life. Even if you pour alcohol into an empty heart, it will not be filled. One day, while I was drunk as usual, I was attacked by a monster. Did you say it was an acute dungeon? I stumbled and fell, struggling to dodge the attack, but I couldn’t dodge it completely. That’s when I lost my eyes.”

“I couldn’t open my eyes because of the burning pain, and even when I opened them, I couldn’t see anything. In the forced darkness, only the sound of monsters approaching filled the world. What I did at that time was a cowardly prayer. I prayed to him. Please save me. I will do anything, I will live devoted to you, so please save me.”

“He willingly embraced even the prodigal son who was like an animal. As if prayers reached, like a miracle, the monster died. It’s amazing. It was His power that caused that miracle. The messenger who wields His power descended before me like an angel.”

Halfway up the hill, there was a flat area where you could rest.

The pilgrim, leaning gently on a stone against a tree, was silent for a while, catching his breath.

There are more hills ahead and they are steeper.

How far should I go?

When will the penance end?

Such a weak heart was buried in sin.

The pilgrim turned his head and looked at Aria.

When she saw that gaze, she felt a strange sense of déjà vu.

“The agent of God who saved me at that time was you. Aria.”

“… … .”

“I lost my eye, but my life was saved. For that alone, I thanked God. Afterwards, I visited your hometown, Agnes Monastery, prayed for repentance, and went on a pilgrimage. I had to repay the response of the person who extended the hand of salvation to an insignificant creature like me. It was a journey of asceticism to let go of greed and fill oneself with faith.”

The pilgrim started pushing the stone again.

“I’ve been pushing this since then. It is a symbol of my sin. He flies through the sky every day, looking down upon us. However, I will not be able to ask for His forgiveness unless I can roll away even one stone on this earth.”

climb the hill

The hill, which was steeper than before, was a penance itself that prevented entry into the sacred place.

Still, the pilgrim did not give up the stone.

Aria saved the pilgrim’s past.

Ever since she heard those words, Aria had remained silent.

The pilgrim continued speaking.

“With this stone, we crossed the no-man’s land, visited a sacred place in the east, and returned to Iunu, where all faiths are said to have originated. Some people asked. Why do you do such a meaningless thing? There were times when I too was shaken. What does this mean? Wouldn’t it be easier to let go? But I focused on my inner voice. It doesn’t matter what anyone says. To achieve faith, all you need is your own voice and will.”

inner voice.

As Helena and Arya listened to the pilgrim, they pondered what their own voices were saying in their hearts.

“I think losing my eyes was both a gift and an ordeal from God. Some people may criticize this too, but I don’t care. If you can gain this kind of enlightenment and remorse, you can sacrifice as much as you want.”

“Faith is so one-sided. It is a world where inner understanding and imagery are everything. I have little learning experience, so I don’t know right from wrong. It doesn’t even matter if you’re reckless or not. I simply heard the voice of my God within me. That’s it. ”

That was the end of the pilgrim’s story.

Neither Helena nor Aria could ask anything more.

Something in the center of my chest stirred.

expiation.

For that reason alone, the pilgrim traveled back and forth across the no man’s land by pushing a boulder that was difficult to push even on flat ground.

Now I’m trying to cross the hill and reach Iunu.

Reckless and foolish.

It was pointed out that it was an impossible task.

But the pilgrim didn’t care.

I just ran it, and finally came back from beyond the no-man’s land.

It was complete fanaticism, excluding reason and rationality.

Helena thought of Ian.

When I saw him about to die, I thought this was the reward for loving God.

It was a pain that was hard to bear.

If that was the price of love, I wanted to retreat to faith.

But what is the difference between love and faith?

After deciding to serve him, Helena became unable to distinguish between the two.

Esther was like that.

The premise of sexual love is equality.

A believer should not be equal to God.

The hands held together for prayer must be empty.

Therefore, believers should send one-sided love, not equal love.

Now I realize that that’s not what’s important.

In the end, your inner voice is important.

What does Ian in his heart say to himself?

Are you ready to follow it?

The pilgrim crossed the no-man’s land and came to the Holy Land right before his eyes, regardless of the opinions and standards of others.

Helena, too, has now abandoned the need to be bound by such standards.

There was no reason to distinguish between love and faith.

For her, love was faith, and faith was love.

*

The pilgrim’s journey to the Holy Land was truly an ascetic journey.

Day and night he climbed the hill without stopping, but he could not make any progress.

It took several days.

Meanwhile, Aria and Helena could not exchange a single word.

All we had to do was occasionally share water and food.

Aria was filling the emptiness in her heart herself.

Profit and utility were her religion.

Absorbing the world’s values soon determined one’s own value.

I believed that, so I lived that way.

The pilgrim said that Arya saved his life.

Acute Dungeon.

Saving him was clearly an act that was far from practical.

However, such useless actions were actually forming the value of Aria as a human being.

It is not for practical benefit.

Honor, or dedication.

The actual benefits she gained always followed suit.

She has no faith, but now she realizes the meaning of faith and devotion.

Why did Ian support him so much?

‘What on earth have I been doing all this time? .’

The slow climb up the hill following the pilgrims was also an ascetic path for her.

Every time I took a step closer to the sacred place, regrets from the past throbbed in my bones.

The Holy Grail containing the regretful truth that I tasted only at the end was too bitter.

*

Two days later, around dawn.

“Huh, huh, haha… .”

The pilgrim climbed the hill and reached the shattered altar of the shrine.

It was the darkest dawn just before dawn.

“Huuuu… . Light… .”

A stone was placed in front of the altar, and the pilgrim knelt down and clasped his hands.

He spoke in a prayerful posture.

“Pilgrims must tell their names to those who see them for the last time. Sisters, will you listen?”

Helena and Aria, standing behind, answered.

“Yes.”

“… Thank you.”

The pilgrim was in a praying posture and slowly raised his head and looked at the sky.

It was still a dark night.

To him who was blind, the world was always night.

“My name is Sisyphus.”

said Sisyphus, the pilgrim.

“I hope that my name, reduced to ashes, can be scattered around the world.”

Sisyphus lowered his head.

Slowed breathing, cold toes.

As if falling into sleep, the crawling voices disperse.

“Amen… .”

Beyond the altar, the sun rose in the east.

The light that crossed the world passed over the altar and illuminated Sisyphus and his stone block.

Helena and Aria carefully checked on Sisyphus.

In a praying position, he lay dead.

It didn’t even move.

Even though he was dead, he was smiling.

The sun shined brightly on that smile.

-Boo!

At that moment, Sisyphus’ stone block was broken in half.

The slanting sunlight illuminated something inside the stone dazzlingly.

“This is… .”

Helena listened to it carefully.

There was a gem whose name I did not know.

The gem, a light yellow, perfect spherical shape, resembles the rising sun.

Helena looked at Aria.

Even then, Arya was sitting next to Sisyphus and praying.

Jeryeong, or prayer of Buddhahood.

Aria slowly opened her eyes and saw Helena, and also saw the sun-like jewel in her hand.

Aria just smiled.

“It’s Helena’s.”

There have been quite a few times when I saw Aria and felt sacred.

She makes you feel that way just by her unique atmosphere.

But now, with my back to the sunlight, it felt truly sacred more than ever.

“… I understand.”

Helena fastened the jewel, which was as big as a finger, to the thread of the rosary.

Lastly, she also offered a short prayer to Sisyphus.

With the sun at their backs, the two priests left the shrine.

Sisyphus climbed the shrine by pushing a boulder.

Helena held the sun gem that came out of the stone and went down to the shrine.

*

“Ha, huh… .”

Lucia staggered to her feet.

The armor is a mess, and the body condition is even worse.

Still, I couldn’t let go of the sword.

You must not back down.

I see the enemy in front of me.

Dozens of military weapons flying without an owner and with a will.

That was her enemy.

‘Mugu’s Tomb.’

A hidden underground dungeon written in Ian’s note.

Lucia was taking some kind of test there.

From a distance away, Kylie watched Lucia run, even though she was staggering.