episode_0162

[Episode 158] – Scary

At Titania’s urgent call, the doctor rushed into the bedroom, gasping for breath.

Without a word of greeting, the doctor immediately began examining Vivian, who was lying on the bed and groaning. Patient care took precedence over formalities.

Titania did not question the doctor’s abrupt entrance into the bedroom. The doctor had a duty to fulfill, and at that moment, the most important thing was her mother’s condition.

The doctor, with a serious expression, checked Vivian’s mouth for signs of consciousness, took her pulse, and then, after exhaling softly, smiled wryly.

“It’s just a simple cold and flu due to stress.”

“A cold and flu? She’s in so much pain, and you’re calling it just a cold and flu?”

Titania, looking tensely at the doctor, furrowed her brow slightly. How could this be just a cold and flu when her body was so hot, and she was in such excruciating pain, with no sign of regaining consciousness?

The doctor wiped Vivian’s damp forehead with a familiar touch. As Titania glared suspiciously at the doctor, he continued to explain with a kind smile.

“Yes, before coming here, I heard that Lily had recently arrived in Vion. It seems that the sudden change in environment has caused considerable fatigue.”

“……”

“The stress and fatigue that had been accumulating must have suddenly erupted. Has there been any recent event that might have caused Lily stress?”

Titania remained silent at the doctor’s question. If there was an event that had stressed her mother recently, it was undoubtedly the disappearance of Veronica. Could Veronica’s absence be what was causing her mother distress?

Seeing Titania’s silence, the doctor did not press further and instead took out some dried herbs from his bag and handed them to Titania. As the pungent scent of the herbs pricked her nose, Titania involuntarily wrinkled her face.

“Twice a day. Steep this and mix it with sweet tea to drink. After taking the medicine, rest well and sweat profusely; you will recover quickly. Then I’ll take my leave…”

The doctor handed over the medicine and swiftly left the room. As the doctor exited, the maids rushed into the bedroom, beginning to wipe the mother’s body with damp towels.

Whether due to lack of energy or simply surrendering to the maids’ touch, the mother only breathed steadily. Watching this, Titania, one of the maids, was fixedly gazing at her when another maid asked with concern.

“Your Majesty, since we will take care of Lily, would you like to take a short rest?”

“…No, I’m fine.”

“But your expression looks very worrisome…”

Startled by the maid’s words, Titania turned to look at the mirror. Was it because this was the first time something like this had happened? Reflected in the mirror, Titania’s face showed signs of anxiety and unease.

“…I’m fine. You can leave what is necessary and go.”

As if trying to erase that expression, Titania wiped her face with one hand and smiled bitterly at the maid. The maid could only nod without saying anything in response.

The maids, having changed Vivian into dry pajamas, bowed their heads to Titania and quickly left the bedroom. Alone again in the room, Titania approached Vivian.

Sitting on the edge of the bed, Titania looked down at Vivian, who seemed a little more relaxed than before, as she slept deeply. Titania understood why Vivian was in pain, yet she couldn’t understand it.

When Veronica left, Mother suffered in sorrow for her absence. If we are not by her side, she suffers and is in agony. Why did she leave us then?

Mother cannot live without us.

She suffers so much if we leave.

Titania tidied Vivian’s disheveled bangs and let out a bitter smile. Suddenly, a bad thought crossed her mind. If, now that her sister had disappeared, she herself also left her mother’s side…

How much pain must mother be in?

Will she be in even more pain than when Unni left?

Titania shook her head to dispel the bad thoughts. It was impossible for her to leave her mother’s side, but she couldn’t help but be curious.

But no matter how curious she was, she didn’t want to see the person she loved suffering and in pain. Titania gently whispered as she stroked Vivian’s pale cheek.

“…Please don’t be in pain.”

*

Time passed, and before they knew it, it was evening.

During dinner time, Mother regained consciousness a few times, but she seemed too weak to speak and only tossed her body a few times. She opened her eyes and then fell asleep again, repeating this several times.

It seemed that the medicine was effective as she no longer made groaning sounds, but she still seemed to struggle to regain consciousness. Moreover, as the doctor had said, she had sweated profusely.

Vivian, in her unconscious state, struggled to remove her damp nightgown. Titania tried to make a wet towel to wipe her, but…

“…The water is cold. I should ask to warm it up again.”

Perhaps because it was winter, the water that had been warmed up was already as cold as ice. Just as Titania was about to get up from the bed to call a maid, she felt her sleeve being tugged and lowered her head.

Looking up at Titania with a hazy gaze, Vivian was tightly holding onto Titania’s sleeve. Seeing this, Titania sat back down on the bed and looked at Vivian.

“Mother, are you okay?”

Vivian responded silently, blinking her eyes. Titania slowly supported Vivian’s neck and helped her sit up. Then she held the cup to Vivian’s lips.

Carefully tilting the cup until it was completely empty, Titania did not remove the cup from Vivian’s lips. Gulp, gulp, sigh. Vivian, who had been rinsing her throat with lukewarm water, let out a wet sigh.

Drinking water seemed to tire Vivian out, and her head slowly leaned towards Titania. Resting her feverish forehead on Titania’s forearm, she took deep breaths, inhaling and exhaling repeatedly.

Truly, even sitting seemed burdensome. Titania carefully laid Vivian back on the bed and, wiping the sweat-drenched strands of hair from her forehead, she spoke, “Feeling sticky? I’ll get some lukewarm water to freshen up.”

As Titania tried to release Vivian’s hand from her sleeve, Vivian seemed unwilling to let go. Titania awkwardly chuckled. “Mother, please let go for a moment…”

“Don’t leave…”

With a firm and subdued voice, Vivian insisted that Titania not leave. Titania looked perplexed, unsure of what to do. Whether it was due to the fever or medication, Vivian began to act petulant, like a young child.

“Still, you feel uncomfortable, don’t you? Let me quickly get some water to freshen up your body…”

“I’m in pain… Don’t go…”

“But still…”

Now, she clung to Titania’s arm, pleading not to leave. This behavior, something Titania would never have done under normal circumstances, left her looking bewildered as she gazed at Vivian.

Just like a whining child.

The sight of her mother throwing a tantrum, insisting that she stay by her side because she was in pain, went beyond mere confusion and stirred worry. After nuzzling her face into Titania’s palm, Vivian sniffled and said, “Come here and lie down… Huh? Stay by my side… I’m in pain…”

“…Alright.”

Titania sighed softly and slowly climbed onto the bed, lying down beside Vivian. A mother who never sought comfort in anyone’s embrace had now sought it for herself, if only for today.

Muttering to herself, Vivian tossed and turned under the covers before burying herself in Titania’s embrace, resting her face against Titania’s chest. Titania chuckled softly, remarking how much Vivian resembled a child.

Stroking Vivian’s head as she breathed heavily, Titania gazed at her with concern. Her mother’s face, flushed with fever, was now streaked with tears.

What is making you so anxious that you’re crying? If it were me, I would never leave my mother’s side, and surely my sister will come back. From now on, I will never leave Mother alone.

“It’s okay, Mother.”

Titania whispered to Vivian as she held her hand, trying to comfort her.

“Don’t worry. I have no intention of going anywhere. I-”

“I won’t go anywhere.”

“Yeah…”

“I’ll always be by your side, Mother.”

“Yeah…”

“Always, by your side. Always, here.”

“Yeah…”

Is she really listening and responding properly?

Titania chuckled softly as she gently squeezed Vivian’s hand. No matter what was said, Mother only closed her eyes and nodded, as if about to fall asleep at any moment.

Titania embraced the trembling Vivian and slowly closed her eyes. Hopefully, just one word saying she wouldn’t leave would alleviate Mother’s pain even a little.

Repeatedly, she whispered the same words into Vivian’s ear.

“…I won’t leave your side, Mother. Really, truly.”

*

‘Always, by your side…’

In a hazy consciousness, Vivian mulled over the voice ringing in her ear.

Perhaps it was because of the intense pain, her consciousness felt jumbled, as if floating on water. Even amidst this, Titania’s voice echoed precisely in her ear, like an echo.

Surely, behaving like this was due to being unwell. Words kept coming out on their own, actions weren’t well thought out. The medicine was too strong, and it was clearly due to the fever. Or maybe it was because of a curse.

So, it must be nonsensical behavior due to illness. Otherwise, there was no reason for Titania to act like this. Begging not to go to her daughter, pleading to be held. It’s disgraceful for a mother.

But…

She couldn’t help but feel this impulse.

If she didn’t do this, she simply couldn’t bear it.

Well, because it hurts so much. Because it’s so agonizing that I can’t even open my eyes. Because Titania’s cold touch felt so good. It was impossible to stop feeling calm in someone’s touch.

The pain lessened and the mind calmed as I nestled in Titania’s embrace. I wanted to be closer to Titania, I wanted to hold her a little longer. It felt like that’s the only way I could survive.

But…

Even though I felt calm, I couldn’t help but feel anxious.

I knew Titania would never do that, but still, I couldn’t help but feel anxious. Every time I breathed in Titania’s embrace, I felt a little scared, like a child.

If this touch leaves, how much will it hurt?

Veronica left and it hurts so much.

If even Titania leaves.

How painful will it be, thinking about it.

Even though I know Titania wouldn’t do that.

Even though I know she’ll always be by my side.

I was a little scared.