episode_0108

At first, I thought it was someone else.

The Alicia I knew was always bold, confident, and overflowing with energy, a young magician.

But what I see in front of me now is…

“I-I’ve been caught by Unni…”

A lonely rabbit abandoned by its owner.

The rabbit meets my eyes for a moment.

In that brief moment of eye contact, it quickly averts its gaze as if overwhelmed by something hot.

“Sorry for coming so suddenly…”

Its ears are trembling faintly.

Perhaps from being wet in the rain and cold.

Or maybe from fear.

Or both…

Even when I was rendered powerless after losing to Rosario, Alicia didn’t look this despondent.

“For now, come inside.”

“…”

I usher Alicia inside.

I focus all my senses on scanning the outside.

But there’s no sign of anyone following.

It doesn’t seem like she was tailed.

“You got caught by Yerina?”

“It’s about you… About you and going to Elvengard…”

“Did you get kicked out of Parana for getting caught? Haha.”

“…”

It was a joke.

But Alicia just silently nods, looking utterly confused.

I never thought she would actually get kicked out.

I already knew from Mia that Yerina found out about our trip to Elvengard.

But I never imagined she would find out that it wasn’t a solo mission, but that I was with her.

I thought Alicia would find a way to smooth things over somehow.

But it seems Yerina’s suspicions were stronger than Alicia’s reassurances.

“No wonder you didn’t have any luggage or belongings.”

Alicia brought nothing.

Absolutely nothing.

No bags, nothing but herself.

Except for the newly acquired Rosario around her neck and the moonstone ring on her finger, there were no valuables.

It seems she was in a hurry to escape.

“It doesn’t seem like she found out about this place.”

Thankfully, it doesn’t seem like Yerina found out about this hideout.

If she did, she would have broken the barrier and come in before Alicia even arrived.

Despite the chaos of her escape, she managed to shake off any pursuers.

But it’s still too early to relax completely.

Yerina has a history of coming here to find Keren.

Once someone comes here, there’s no guarantee they won’t come back.

“How much did you reveal? Did you even wet yourself in front of me twice?”

“…”

“Sorry. Wasn’t fun, was it?”

“I’ve… never seen Unni so angry before… She’s scolded me for my sake many times, but it was the first time she turned that anger on me. I thought I was doing the right thing… Unni called me a traitor, a thief… *sob*”

“Enough. I get the gist of the situation. Go wash up. Come out and talk again.”

Alicia bursts into tears, trembling.

Realizing it’s not the time for jokes, I let Alicia bury her face in my chest for a moment.

I feel tears soaking my clothes along with the trembling vibrations.

As she nestles in my warm embrace, Alicia’s trembling gradually subsides.

Her sobs have now faded away.

Just as I start to think she’s okay and relax a bit, her wrist catches my eye.

“This is…”

“Hm?”

Her wrist is covered in scars.

Originally hidden by makeup, now washed away by the rain.

It looks like it was cut with a knife, messy.

It doesn’t seem recent, it looks quite old…

Alicia suddenly realizes and hurriedly hides her wrist from me as if she had forgotten.

Should I ask about the scars?

After a moment of awkward silence due to contemplation, Linda, who had rushed in after finishing her recharge late, looked around to assess the situation.

[Is there anything I can help with?]

“Help me bathe this one. I’ll get the clothes for changing.”

[Understood, master. Come this way. It’s better to take off the wet clothes first, as you might catch a cold.]

After exchanging glances with me, Linda, as if understanding, took Alicia towards the bathroom.

Alicia’s condition seemed concerning.

I was also worried about the wound on her wrist.

So, not wanting to leave her alone in case something happened, I sent Linda with her.

If Linda hadn’t been there, I would have had to go in with her.

“Should I wait until she comes out?”

After hearing the sound of the bathroom door closing, I picked up the wet clothes that Alicia had casually dropped, put them in the laundry basket, and then she came out.

It was clear that Alicia had made an impression on Yerina, but I would have to hear the details from her directly.

“Maybe I should take a nap too.”

Even in this situation, looking at the still-sleeping Mijeong made me feel drowsy as well.

I lay down on the sofa and hugged the limp Mijeong like a corpse.

Mijeong struggled in her sleep, her face contorted, but to me, it felt refreshing, as there was no better pillow than her.

“Where are you trying to sleep? You should replenish your energy.”

“Ah.”

And just as I was about to close my eyes, her mouth crawled up on the sofa and faced me.

Ah, that’s right.

I had agreed to kiss her.

Everything seemed distant.

[The slippers are here.]

Did Linda say that?

Following the guidance of the mechanical spirit, I came out of the bathroom and put on the slippers.

Then, I slowly made my way to the lounge.

“Oh, you’ve finished washing up?”

Yujin woke up for a moment and called out to me.

By her side was the vampire who always accompanied her.

And another woman whom I didn’t know…

Why was that man always so consistent?

With that thought, I felt more at ease.

I found myself able to suppress my heavy heart and let out a small laugh.

“It’s rude to ask a lady such questions.”

“Isn’t it rude to pee in front of others?”

“Excuse me?!”

“Don’t be mad, come here. You look hungry, you should eat something. And the clothes suit you well.”

“Um, suit me… they’re a bit small…”

I hesitated for a moment under the scrutinizing gaze.

After finishing my bath and coming out, the clothes I was given to change into were none other than a fluttering nightgown.

It was so thin that the inside was clearly visible.

Thanks to the underwear that had been washed and brought to me earlier, I was able to avoid the embarrassment of wearing this revealing gown without any undergarments.

My underwear seemed to have been washed by that vampire.

Surely Yujin wouldn’t have done it herself…

“It’s small because it’s a nightgown for Mijeong.”

“I… never… wore it… even once.”

“It’s as good as new. Take it if you want.”

“I don’t need it. It’s such a tiny nightgown.”

“Aw.”

No wonder it was small.

The skirt seemed like it would reveal my underwear if I lifted it slightly, and the chest area felt tight.

But in a hurry, I decided to take comfort in having at least some clothes to wear.

“Have you two met before?”

“Yes… Is she a new slave to be called ‘footman’?”

“Well, something like that.”

I meant to be sarcastic, but Yujin agreed, and the mysterious woman sitting next to her also responded casually, which was quite perplexing.

She really was a slave…

“She doesn’t have a name yet. You can call her ‘Bug’ for convenience. She’s a monster.”

“It’s not good! Just try calling me a bug! I’ll bite off those rabbit ears!”

“Heh, hehe.”

“And this is Alicia Yevgenia.”

“Oh, oh. The one I mentioned before, that turning the handle above your head will dispense lemonade…”

“Excuse me?!”

His face suddenly lit up.

What on earth has this person been saying about me to others!

As the anger flared up, memories from that time resurfaced, and a tingling sensation spread in my lower abdomen.

Crazy bastard. There’s no restraint now…

“For now, come and sit down. Have a burrito or something to eat. Hey, you! When did you finish eating all that food!”

“Uh, um. It seems like I need more calories to eat as my body grows bigger.”

“…Pig. Stop, just eat.”

[Ahaha. I’ll make more soon. Don’t fight.]

“…”

Annoyed and frustrated.

But the undeniable fact is that I am quite comfortable accepting this atmosphere.

Suddenly appearing without questioning the reason for it.

Not even asking about my wrist…

Thinking that here, there’s just one wandering mercenary and two monsters, I felt even more at ease.

Just a while ago, I felt like I had lost everything.

Confronting the gloomy face of the rabbit reflected in the bath, staring at my old scar on my wrist, I felt like I was drowning in past pain.

But as soon as I came out, I started to feel energized.

Actually, it might be because I got angry…

But who knows, it might not matter…

“Thank you. Thanks to you, I feel calmer now.”

“Huh? What for?”

“Pretending to be indifferent… I have something to tell you.”

Thud.

Sitting on the single sofa, grabbing a burrito from the table, I brought up the topic.

It’s the first time I’m talking about my past in such a comfortable atmosphere.

It seems like it will be quite a long story.

I caressed my wrist’s throbbing scar, hesitated, and then began to speak.

The prestigious clan of rabbit beastmen in the magic wasteland of the North, who produced many great wizards.

Yevgenia is commonly known as such.

But as with the backside of all beautiful things…

The inner reality of Yevgenia was quite ugly.

One of the advantages of rabbit beastmen is their rapid reproduction.

Yevgenia took advantage of this rare advantage of rabbit beastmen.

Unlike other noble families who refrained from producing offspring for fear of diluting their wealth and power, Yevgenia actively produced offspring.

After confirming the magical aptitude of the born offspring.

Those with aptitude were sent back to the main house for education, and the rest were discarded.

Discarded in the literal sense.

They were expelled from the family and left to starve or whatever fate awaited them.

Yevgenia improved the bloodline without magical aptitude in this way, saving costs.

Climbing up by stepping on the sacrifices of many children.

Yevgenia could stand shoulder to shoulder with the traditional magic families in the South.

And I, Alicia Yevgenia, was born as the eldest daughter of the family.

But being the family’s child did not change the standard.

I had to undergo the same test as all the other Yevgenia children, and if I didn’t pass, I would be driven out.

That was the rule of Yevgenia.

But the test results were abysmal for me.

I had no magical aptitude.

At least, that’s how it seemed at the time.

Not long after the results were announced, the cold gazes of the adults, which turned from expectations to disappointment, still linger in my eyes.

That day, I was supposed to be driven out.

Along with the other children without aptitude.

But my father broke the rule.

He declared that he would not send me away and would leave me at the main house.

As the decision of the absolute power-holding head of the family, no one could overturn it.

The voices of constant opposition were to be expected.

While the master prevented me from freezing on cold winter days,

she couldn’t shield me from the harsh gazes within the family.

A useless child.

Trash.

Shameless wench.

Worthless human, and so on.

These were the words I grew up hearing.

Growing up in the main house, I didn’t receive the treatment of a main house member.

I didn’t even receive the education that relatives received.

I had to eat whatever was left after they finished their meals.

Adults cursed me to my face, peers ostracized me, and servants avoided me out of fear of punishment.

Even the master avoided me, busy appeasing her subjects.

I alone, in the Evgenia Castle, could not possess the castle of Evgenia.

I could endure such things.

Hardship, difficulty, and occasional tears were bearable.

If it was just external humiliation and persecution, I could toughen my exterior and hide my fragile heart to withstand it.

But what truly hurt me was nothing but guilt.

The sight of those young children, leaving me behind in the main house.

Every year, as news of their deaths trickled in one by one, it became unbearable.

While others either died or toiled hard as laborers without experiencing winter…

I alone enjoyed warm meals in a proper home.

I was supposed to live the same life as them.

I just had a bit of luck.

That made it harder for me to endure.

“Hey, did you hear that story? About the kids who were expelled during our time.”

“Are they still alive?”

“They say half of them are dead and half are alive. But that half is going to be sold as slaves in the south this time.”

“Hahaha! They’ll have it easier! Living in noble houses in warm lands like the south!”

“Hey! Vulture! How about you get sold as a slave too?”

“…”

As I grew older, the torment worsened.

My thoughts multiplied as my hair grayed, and guilt swelled.

As time passed, I began to think that maybe their words were right.

Why am I here?

Wouldn’t it have been easier to be sold as a slave with those kids who were expelled that day?

Why was I the only one who received salvation that day?

No. Was salvation even the right word?

Did the master truly have my best interests at heart?

Or maybe, did she deliberately shield me alone to inflict pain on me?

When I was alone, a thousand thoughts plagued my mind.

Those distractions made my head ache.

The only thing that could make me forget all this pain was a greater pain.

From then on, I started cutting my wrists.

Perhaps there was a subconscious desire to show my suffering, but mostly, it was because my mind cleared as blood flowed.

As my wrists throbbed in pain, my mind remained clear.

But as the blood stopped and the wounds healed, the distractions and headaches inevitably returned.

I couldn’t stop self-harming and became dependent on it.

By the time the scars covered my wrists completely,

“Alicia. What is this?”

Finally.

The master had discovered it.

In that moment, I felt a slight thrill.

I wished someone would notice my wounds.

I hoped they would understand how much I was suffering and wanted to die.

In my childish mind, I had such thoughts.

“It’s unsightly, so wear gloves when you go out. If the elders see it, you’ll get an earful.”

“…”

I was foolish.

There was no one to sympathize with me.

No one was on my side.

After living in this house for 10 years, I finally realized the truth.

I, as a young child, knew that I couldn’t escape this despair through self-harm.

I thought about death very early on.

I truly wanted to die.

It wasn’t some fantasy of my family members or relatives crying and regretting after I died.

I just wanted to escape this reality quickly because it was so painful.

“Come forth, the one who will become the head of this family! I am Yeriya Frost! I will kneel before Yevgenia and become a servant, the future king!”

That was the time.

When I met my sister.

And when my life turned completely upside down.