episode_0102

The way back was easier than expected.

We did run into monsters a few times, but thanks to Alice and Kkamang handling everything, nothing happened.

Though I had been kidnapped quite far away, using the warp gate made it a non-issue.

“Food! Food! Food! Food! Food!”

The only slight problem was Serena, who kept pestering me by shouting for food next to me.

Anyway.

We safely arrived at the inn.

“We’re at the inn, so food! S-rank chef’s food! Delicious food!”

“I get it, so stop talking.”

“Okay! But what’s for dinner tonight?”

“Hmm…”

Since I wanted to take it easy today, I decided on something simple, quick, and easy to make.

“Simple, quick, and easy food?”

“Yeah.”

“What is it?”

“Ramen.”

I set up the heating magic tool made by Geum Taeyang & Merlin, placed two pots, and took out two types of ramen I had gotten from the gacha.

Spicy ramen.

Kalguksu-style ramen.

I boiled two types of ramen for Alice, who can’t handle spicy food.

‘But just boiling it would be too boring, right?’

So I added some extra ingredients.

‘Seafood is the best with ramen!’

Starting with the lobster and king crab I had bought earlier, I loaded it up with seafood—jumbo shrimp, abalone, mussels, squid, octopus, and more.

I chopped up some vegetables, added a bit more seasoning, and finished it off.

‘Wow… this looks insane.’

When I was done, it looked like a luxurious seafood stew.

Damn.

Using expensive lobster and king crab in ramen—what a flex.

Lee Junseong, you’ve really made it.

…I praised myself as I served a bowl to each of them.

‘They say food that’s easy to eat tastes better.’

I arranged the seafood beautifully to give it a high-class feel.

“Let’s eat!”

“……”

“……”

“……”

“……?”

Everyone silently stared at their ramen bowls.

What?

Is there something weird about it?

‘Hmm…’

Come to think of it, in the Prophecy RPG, they had hesitated the first time they ate seafood too.

Fish were familiar since they could be caught in rivers or lakes, but other seafood only came from the ocean.

At first, they even doubted whether these creatures were edible.

But.

After one bite, they loved it and ate it all.

I was about to explain when—

“Wow…”

“?”

“I’ve never seen such a pretty dish before…”

“Pretty?…”

Weird.

In the Prophecy RPG, they called it a bizarre lifeform.

Why the change?

…I thought as I looked at the ramen bowl.

“Ah…”

If an S-rank hero is someone who writes legends with a sword, an S-rank chef is someone who writes legends with flavor.

Not only do they satisfy the tongue, but they present a perfect dish that satisfies all five senses.

Eyes are satisfied, ears are satisfied, nose is satisfied, a shiver runs through the body, even the skin is satisfied.

They’ve reached the realm of Five-Senses Satisfaction.

So.

Elevating a ramen bowl into a beautiful work of art was child’s play.

…was what I realized.

‘Now that I look at it, it really is artistic…’

The others reacted similarly.

“Wow… it’s so pretty, it feels like a waste to eat…”

“Cain, what the hell? You were always good at cooking, but… this is actual art.”

“It feels like looking at a holy relic made to offer to the gods… Ah… is it blasphemy to compare food to a holy relic?…”

“No! This food is a hundred, no, a thousand times more magnificent than a holy relic! I hereby declare this food superior to any holy relic!”

Serena acknowledged my ramen as an art surpassing holy relics.

Hey now.

No matter how you spin it, comparing holy relics to ramen is…

‘Is this okay?’

Most holy relics are just things they made themselves and then claimed were blessed by the gods.

Only a tiny fraction are actually connected to real gods.

It’s closer to a scam where they create something so artistic it feels god-made and then lie about it.

…That said,

since the creators are all high-ranking clergy, the relics do carry genuine divine power.

So their effects are decent enough.

…But still,

they’re just junk items I have no intention of obtaining.

Why?

Because Sophia in a battlesuit is several times stronger than Sophia equipped with holy relics.

No need to go through trials for such trash.

‘In the first place, the holy relic events are only important for Sophia’s faith-awakening event…’

Right now, it’s unnecessary.

In the game, she constantly doubted whether she was truly with the Goddess of Light, Serene, and prayed endlessly,

but not now.

Because the Goddess of Light, Serene, is right beside her, calling her “my saintess” with certainty.

There’s no reason for Sophia’s faith to waver.

…I was lost in these Prophecy RPG tidbits when—

Kkamang spoke up.

“Cain… sir?…”

“Yeah?”

“We never settled on how to address you… so I called you ‘Cain sir’ for now… is that okay?”

“It’s fine. Call me whatever you want.”

“Then, Cain sir… um… I have a question…”

“What is it?”

“How do I eat this?”

“Chopsticks are best, but a fork works too… Ah…”

I looked at Kkamang’s cat paws.

Not only chopsticks,

but even a fork would be impossible with those paws.

‘Having her eat by burying her face in the bowl is a bit…’

For other foods, that might work,

but ramen is hard to eat that way.

…I glanced at Serena.

Cat paws were a problem,

but dog paws were too.

…Or so I thought.

“Noodles.”

“Yes~”

“Shrimp.”

“Yes~”

“Abalone.”

“Yes~”

“Lobster.”

“Yes~”

Every time she called out an ingredient, Sophia fed her.

“Wow…”

“What?”

“Using the saintess as chopsticks is just… hmm…”

“What? She’s my saintess, I’ll use her how I want.”

“That’s right. I am the saintess of the Goddess of Light, Serene. If Serene wishes, I will gladly serve as her hands, feet, or even chopsticks—her faithful servant.”

“Exactly! That’s my saintess!”

“Ahh… to be able to serve Serene like this… Could any other saintess be this happy?”

Sophia, moved, kept feeding her,

while Serena kept eating.

‘Well… that is the saintess’s job…’

A saintess is the god’s proxy.

A loyal servant who carries out the god’s will.

So.

That behavior is the most saintess-like thing to do.

A loyal pair of divine chopsticks, performing actions on behalf of Serene.

It feels slightly different, but

anyway.

Serena was eating well, so no need to worry.

‘The problem is Kkamang… Ah!… This’ll work.’

I immediately used dark magic.

“Arise! Army of the Dead!”

At my command, the dead began to rise one by one.

From the ramen bowl, the king crab, lobster, shrimp, and clams—stripped of their flesh—rose as shells and merged together.

Behold, the Claw Chopstick Hand.

A thin, elongated claw-shaped hand designed to pick up anything like chopsticks.

It works on the same principle as a skeleton.

Remove all the flesh from a human,

gather only the bones, and you get a skeleton soldier.

Remove all the flesh from a king crab,

gather only the shell, and you get a Claw Chopstick Hand.

Similar, right?

…I attached the Claw Chopstick Hand to Kkamang’s shoulder.

“What is this?”

“Wait a bit. I’ll connect it so it moves like a real hand.”

Zzt! Zzt!

I magically linked Kkamang and the Claw Chopstick Hand.

“How is it?”

“Wow… it moves just like a real hand.”

Kkamang moved the claw hand around, fascinated.

“It’s not a perfect hand, so it’ll fall off after about 30 minutes, but it’ll last long enough for a meal.”

“Yes! With this, I can eat!”

“Then enjoy.”

“Yes!”

Kkamang happily slurped up the ramen.

I gave her half spicy, half non-spicy since I didn’t know her preference,

and she ate both well.

“It’s delicious!”

Plus, since I removed all the shells, she didn’t have to bother peeling anything.

She ate with incredible ease.

‘Should I do this for myself too?’

I casually lifted all the shells from my bowl and discarded them.

Only the flesh remained,

turning it into shell-free seafood ramen.

Oh.

This is nice.

“Master! Me too, me too!”

“Cain! Do mine too!”

“Got it.”

I removed all the shells from Ria and Alice’s bowls too.

‘This is really convenient.’

Crab and shrimp taste great,

but peeling them is such a hassle that I usually avoid them.

But with dark magic stripping all the shells?

Delicious!

And easy to eat—the perfect food!

…I chewed the crab meat comfortably when—

“Kkamang?”

“Yes?”

Serena suddenly spoke up, eyeing Kkamang’s Claw Chopstick Hand.

“Is that convenient?”

“Yes! Super convenient! It’s even easier than using real hands—I might get addicted!”

Kkamang praised the Claw Chopstick Hand highly.

She said moving a hand with built-in chopsticks

was more comfortable than using chopsticks with her own hands.

“Cain.”

“What?”

“Make me one too. And while you’re at it, peel all the crab meat for me.”

I made it immediately.

Then.

Serena happily used the Claw Chopstick Hand, but—

“Se… Serene?…”

Since eating with the Claw Chopstick Hand

was way more convenient than using the saintess as chopsticks,

the saintess-chopsticks were naturally abandoned.

“Serene!… Use me!… I’ll do better!…”

“No… you should eat too…”

“I don’t mind!”

“This is more comfortable, so I’ll stick with this.”

“Waaahh!”

The saintess, abandoned(?) by her goddess, burst into tears.