episode_0088
by fnovelpia“······.”
“······.”
A girl with clenched fists. And a man looking down with subtle eyes.
It was an atmosphere that was difficult to describe.
But in any case, isn’t it comforting? Revan bowed his head in gratitude.
“Thank you.”
“Uh, yes…”
Even though she was greeted, Adora was still twitching her fingers. An attitude that shows not even an ounce of dignity as a god.
“It’s really okay. Because it happened in the past.”
To be honest, it’s still not okay. Vivian’s voice occasionally glimmered in Revan’s ears, and her last words to forget herself actually made him unable to forget the red woman.
But this wasn’t a place for sulking. Revan feigned composure as best he could and faced Adora.
“···Yes. If that’s you, then we should get to the point.”
Main subject. What those two letters meant was simple.
“I will give you a new blessing. Revan.”
***
“So Revan?”
“Yes. Adora.”
Before they knew it, the tone of their conversation had changed to that of when they first offered the sacrifice. It was a solemn, weighty voice.
“Looking back on your past, what did you think?”
In most cases, gods do not specifically ask believers anything when giving blessings. Just grant it.
It’s something that can’t be helped. Because most gods have countless believers. It is impossible to interview each person individually.
“Hmm! I will personally give you the blessing you want and that is right for you!”
But Adora was different. I can focus my full attention on Revan. To put it better, it means being meticulous, and to put it worse, it means having time to spare.
“···Hmm.”
Revan, who received Adora’s question, was lost in thought as he pressed his thumb to his temple.
Adora said before showing the past in the first place. In the end, you have to find what you want.
So Revan did not simply appreciate his stained past as if he were watching a movie or a play. I constantly thought and asked myself.
‘What came to mind about L was unexpected.’
ha. A deep, heavy sigh escaped Revan’s mouth.
“Yes. Please speak comfortably. Even if it’s embarrassing and selfish, it doesn’t matter!”
It was a foreshadowing of what would soon follow. Adora responded with a lively voice.
Revan looked into Adora’s bright eyes and began to move his mouth.
***
“If you think about it.”
“Mmmmm!”
Nod. Adora shook her head up and down. It was a lively atmosphere created to ensure that Revan would not be embarrassed no matter what request he made.
“I always thought my life was full of misfortune and irresistibility.”
However, the words that came out this time were quite weighty. Adora nodded a little less energetically than before.
“That’s right. There were so many bumps in your path.”
“Well, that’s right. But this is what I think. Really, did I have no choice?”
“······?”
It was the exact opposite of what I expected, which was that they would actively express their demands. A question mark appeared in Adora’s head.
“What is that?”
“The discourse is, did I really make the best choice? I guess I might have averted my eyes to suit my own convenience.”
Phew. A lighter and shorter sigh than before escaped.
“When I first signed the contract and was sold, was there really only one option for me?”
“···Uh, huh?”
“I am not a fool. But it was stupid at the time. The moment I picked up the pen and wrote my name on the contract, I knew. That this signature will be able to hold me by the leash.”
Revan looked back on his past and organized his thoughts at the time one by one. That was the conclusion that came from that.
“Was there really no other way than to sign? At that time, the bond between me and Sonia was quite deep. If I had not quietly signed and talked a little more before coming forward to Bert.”
Adora looked into Revan’s eyes. The eyes were filled with regret.
“Wouldn’t there have been a way to live a life where we look at each other, rather than in this broken relationship like now?”
“···That is.”
That’s something you don’t know. Revan cut off Adora’s words.
“I thought about it as ‘realistically’ as possible at the time. In that situation, it would be inappropriate for a user to confront Berat. It would be difficult for Sonia, who was already in a bad mood, to accept. In the end, Sonia will follow her father’s will, as in.
So, if you look at it from a different angle, isn’t it that I’ve been doing what I want in the end?”
Before I knew it, Revan’s voice had become quite overheated. So much so that it was difficult to find a gap for Adora to intervene.
“It’s the same with Vivian. What if I had somehow persuaded Vivian on the spot? Before that, if I had at least resisted when the guards dragged me away.”
“···In a death match, if you don’t comply, you both die, right? In the first place, you tried to adapt to death.”
“Yes! That’s the problem!”
Puheap. A laugh escaped Revan’s mouth.
“Of course, the probability of that happening is high. But the important thing is that I couldn’t even come up with the idea of joining forces with Vivian to overcome the situation!”
“······.”
“So, it is clear that I looked back on the past and realized something.”
Sigh. Revan’s thumb pressed hard against his chest.
“I am also partly responsible for what has happened so far.”
“···That is.”
that. Aren’t you being too harsh on yourself?
Adora couldn’t bring herself to say those words out loud. Because it seemed like it wouldn’t reach Revan’s ears right now.
“So, Mother, I desperately want to.”
chuck. Revan’s one knee touched the floor and a polite voice was addressed to Adora.
“It didn’t matter the weight of the risk I was carrying. What’s important is the confidence to commit yourself to the looming difficult path ahead.
Mother, please give me a torch that can help me navigate difficult paths and advance on paths that have not been found. It doesn’t matter if the fuel is myself.”
It was a voice that was earnest and full of weight at the same time. For a moment, Adora kept her mouth shut and could not answer.
“···I understand. Oh my.”
But in the end, Adora had no choice but to nod towards Revan. In order to keep the promise she made to fully support her child, who has been pushed around so far.
“···The amount of faith that a god receives from a believer is determined by how precious the person sacrifices.
Although human faith does not have material value, this is why it becomes a faith greater than any amount of gold or silver treasure. Faith itself is something precious to humans. Sometimes it’s a stepping stone, sometimes it’s fuel.
But in the end, what do you think humans value most?”
cook. Adora’s index finger stabbed Revan in the chest. It was the same area that I had pressed myself just before.
“It is oneself. There is nothing more precious to humans than themselves. In the end, if you do not fully exist, the world is no different from non-existence. But you…”
-Smurf. Adora’s index finger brushed Revan’s chest for a moment, then fell and hovered in the air.
“You believe that there is something more important than yourself.”
“···Yes. Yes.”
“······Ha.”
This time, a deep and heavy sigh escaped Adora’s mouth.
“···I wanted you to affirm yourself. I hoped you would overcome your life full of hardships and move on.”
“That would be a healthier way.”
“Ha, that guy knows that.”
The mouth that seemed to be criticizing Revan for a moment soon closed. Adora smiled bitterly and placed her hand on the top of Revan’s head.
“Faith sent to me. And, a promise that you can offer yourself. There is absolutely nothing lacking as an offering.”
“Thank you.”
Revan honestly expressed his gratitude. Because he knew that Adora was accommodating to his stubbornness.
“A pretty powerful blessing may be passed on to you. At least it’s better than having Sylvia fill in the core.”
Although it was something Revan didn’t want, Adora’s voice was somewhat dark.
“···Close your eyes for a moment. The light may be dazzling.”
“Okay.”
As soon as he answered, Revan’s eyes closed. All I could feel was Adora’s hand caressing the top of my head.
“···Levan.”
“Yes. Mother.”
“I cannot understand your feelings. I am not you, you have your own heart and mind.”
Hahahaha! Even with my eyes closed, a tangible light began to float around me. Somewhere warm and soft.
“Pushing yourself for ideals and goals. That might also be a way to live life. But, don’t forget.”
While Revan closed his eyes. Adora spread her arms wide. Then, he wrapped his arms around Revan’s head and whispered in his ear.
“Sometimes, you have to lean on someone. And, I will always be your place to lean on.”
Suddenly, the light that seemed to pierce Revan’s eyelids faded. At the same time, Adora spoke to Revan in a loving and gentle voice.
“Goodbye, child. May your wish come true.”
***
“···Ah.”
The central hall of the lodging prepared by the elves. Revan’s eyes opened on the sofa.
“Are you okay?”
A pure white girl looked down at Revan. Bright pumpkin-like eyes. It was El.
“···How much time has passed since I made the decision?”
Revan asked, his head somewhat half-asleep.
“It wasn’t that meaningful. About 30 seconds at most?”
“···Aha.”
Perhaps there was something that ignored time relationships. Revan looked straight into El’s face.
A sharp nose. In a way, the eyes are like gold. And, pure white hair with no blemishes. It was the L he knew.
“Why are you doing that?”
“Nothing.”
Is it because of the gap between reality and imagination? For some reason, it felt like it had been a long time since Revan saw El.
But I didn’t want to waste time in a half-asleep state. Revan looked at El.
“Senior. Why don’t you go for a walk somewhere?”
“Yes?”
At the sudden request, L’s eyes widened like a watered cat.
“I have something to say.”
Revan smiled softly and faced El. And I finished preparing for confession.
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