episode_0080

*

I fled towards the Cathedral as if chased by something.

What pursued me wasn’t Anna’s fatal temptation, threatening my faithfulness as a cleric, nor Lucia’s mournful gaze, shaking the very foundation of my soul.

What relentlessly chased and frightened me was none other than my own desire.

I want to hold Lucia, I want to hold Anna.

In fact, the very act of my resisting so vehemently was absurd.

Because it wouldn’t harm me.

A woman’s virginity and a man’s are valued differently, and generally, being courted by beautiful girls wouldn’t be a bad thing at all.

Even in this time when the world has fallen.

Therefore, I was trying very hard to restrain my surging desires.

The truth is, this burly body wouldn’t have any trouble pushing those slender girls away.

What’s really difficult is ignoring the whisper in my heart to just accept their favor as it is.

This isn’t lust, it’s just accepting their kindness.

The world has fallen, and my messy body can comfort their uneasy hearts that have been given to devils, so is that such a bad thing?

Besides, honestly, you’re the one benefiting, so why are you acting so coldly as if you’re losing out?

Such words arose and disappeared countless times in my head.

My heart and genitals twitched ceaselessly, chipping away at my patience.

I recalled the countless heretics who had fallen at my hands.

I had inwardly scoffed at their excessive desires and their base lack of patience in restraining those desires, but now, I felt like I understood their hearts.

“Prayer. I need to pray. Clear my head… haa…”

My staggering steps, caused by walking with a thick rod between my legs, had already reached the Cathedral’s door.

I slowly tried to enter the Cathedral as it was.

At that moment.

“Priest!”

I heard someone calling me from nearby.

I slowly turned my head.

“Priest! Look at this!”

“It’s Sola.”

Sola ran up to me, holding a frog she must have picked up somewhere, huddled in her hand, and held it out to me.

Seeing the frog, eyes closed and huddled, breathing faintly, and Sola’s hands covered in dirt, it seemed she had bothered to take out a hibernating frog.

“Look! A frog!”

“Where did you find it?”

“Uh… near the village entrance!”

Sola said, averting her gaze.

It was clear she was lying.

Compared to Luciana, who deceived me with the lie that her body was feverish, or Anna, who skillfully teases me in many ways, she was an incredibly transparent child.

Seeing Sola’s innocence, the flames of desire that had been raging in my heart seemed to die down little by little.

Could it be because she had lived on the island her whole life?

I felt that Sola’s appearance, still retaining a childlike innocence beyond her age, was somehow like the waves.

Unstoppable by anyone, but forever retaining its blueness.

“You went outside the village.”

“… Uh, no?”

“…”

“… Aaaa… niyo?”

“Haa… Sola.”

Normally, I might have scolded her severely, but, comforted by Sola’s pure appearance, I decided to lightly chide her with words only.

Thanks to Sola, the snake between my legs had also lost its strength and was comfortably drooping its head.

I gently scolded her with a soft voice.

“I told you it’s dangerous outside the village because of monsters.”

“… It’s not.”

“Really?”

“… Actually, it is.”

“Sola…”

“But, I didn’t see any monsters. When I went to save Priest last time… the monsters ran away as soon as I got close…”

Perhaps, the monsters instinctively sensed the devil’s energy dormant within her.

Because the devil dwelling within Sola is not a typical devil.

“Eung… I thought Priest would like it… so I came to show it to you first.”

Sola lowered her head, making a sad face.

I silently smiled, raising the corner of my mouth at Sola’s appearance.

“What are you doing, bothering a hibernating animal. These kids are waiting for spring to come underground because they’ll freeze to death if they come outside.”

“Heok. Really?”

“Why are you acting like you’re hearing it for the first time, I think I taught you this during Mass before.”

During one of the sermons, there was content that expressed the believers by likening them to hibernating animals.

It was a quote that many Fathers enjoyed using, so I also knew it.

I remembered using it several times during Mass after being assigned to the island because I had nothing else to say, but it seemed Sola was either distracted or dozing off every time.

Sola tilted her head with a foolish face.

“Ah…?”

“You keep dozing off during Mass…”

“Ah… hehe,”

Sola laughed awkwardly.

Seeing that innocent face, my desire to get angry also subsided.

Perhaps it’s better for Sola to be like this, as she is now.

I had been worried because Sola often had a dark look on her face these days, but this foolish appearance was better to see.

“But these days… I’m praying hard with Priest.”

“That’s true.”

Sola covered the frog in her hand with both hands and blew her breath into it as she continued to speak.

“Hoo… Priest,”

“Yeah.”

“Like this… Hoo-ook, if I keep breathing on it… Hoo-ooo, will it come back to life?”

“… Who does it for you when you sleep.”

“Aha… Hoo-ook,”

“Bury it back where it was.”

“Hoo-ook… Yes,”

Even though I said that, the frog would likely die even if she buried it again.

I don’t know much about animal hibernation, but even if a frog that has already been taken out and exposed to sub-zero weather re-enters the ground, there was no guarantee it would survive healthily.

Sola’s breath… I don’t know if it will have any effect.

Probably won’t have any effect.

Still, I didn’t bother to say that fact in order to protect Sola’s innocence.

Seeing Sola’s appearance, diligently blowing her breath in to try to save the frog somehow, I felt proud, so I reached out my hand to stroke her head without saying a word.

“…!”

However, I quickly withdrew my hand without touching her.

This hand had been entangled with Anna’s tongue in her mouth until just a moment ago.

I froze with my hand raised awkwardly.

“Priest? What are you doing?”

“… I’m the same way. I’m… no different from that frog.”

“Eung?”

“It’s nothing.”

Just as a frog that has already come out can only die, I who have already succumbed to desire… may not be able to avoid corruption no matter how hard I resist.

No matter how much I resist her temptations, I may end up giving in.

Sola’s innocence has stabilized me again, but that may be as futile as her breath.

Where did it go wrong?

When I decided to touch Lucia?

Or when they were taken over by demons?

When I carelessly summoned Kunat?

Perhaps, from the moment this world fell, I was already destined to be like this?

“… Ha,”

“…?”

“What should I do…”

“… Eit,”

Sola came up to me and jumped up, bringing her head to my hand.

Then, with the hand that wasn’t holding the frog, she pulled down my arm and rubbed it against her head.

“… Sola?”

“Heuheung,”

Sola shook her messy hair and smiled happily, purring like a cat.

“It feels good when Priest strokes me.”

“…”

“I’ll go put the frog back in the ground.”

Sola ran away, running as she had approached me.

I stared at Sola, who was moving away, and slowly entered the Cathedral.

*

I knelt on the floor and prayed for a long time.

Why is my faithfulness, which did not waver even in the days when I had never met the Goddess, more confused now, after seeing her in a dream?

That’s because I forgot my diligence.

I deeply reflected and prayed with a more earnest heart.

It wasn’t a prayer asking her to grant my request.

It wasn’t a prayer asking her to hold me steady.

It was a prayer asking for scathing criticism of me and for her to punish me and warn me so that I would never fall into temptation again.

After finishing the prayer that had lasted for a long time, I slowly stood up and entered the small Priest’s room inside the Cathedral.

It was a shabby room with only a simple desk and chair.

There was a small cabinet hanging on the wall, and inside was the ceremonial wine that Lucia and I had saved before.

I silently took out the wine and opened it.

“Eugh,”

It was now completely vinegar.

I sighed and drank the stale wine in one gulp.

The red liquid, with its strong stench and indescribable strange taste, slipped down the inside of my throat.

A few drops of wine that I couldn’t swallow fell from the corner of my mouth and ran down my chin.

Unable to empty even half of it, I took the wine bottle away from my mouth.

“Keuek, this… cough, it’s not something to drink.”

It’s gone bad.

Like my faith.

“Damn it.”

I threw the wine bottle at the wall.

The sound of the bottle hitting the wall and shattering… wasn’t heard.

“…”

I slowly turned my head and looked in the direction I had thrown the wine.

“… You,”

“You said it was wine made with Holy Water, is it okay to treat it so carelessly?”

There stood Kunat, with one hand on her hip, holding the bottle.

I gave a hollow laugh and wiped the wine from my chin with my sleeve and said.

“I thought you couldn’t enter the Cathedral.”

“Surely, I was just respecting your privacy.”

“… You’ve decided not to respect it anymore?”

“I thought you needed good wine and a good companion.”

Kunat opened the window, poured out the wine left in the bottle, and shook out the last drop.

Then she slowly lifted the empty bottle, put her lips to the bottle’s entrance, and gently blew her breath in.

New wine was seen instantly rising inside the bottle.

The strong aroma of alcohol instantly filled the Priest’s room.

Kunat gestured for me to sit on the chair, and sat across from me, naturally crossing her legs.

It seemed there was only one chair, but looking at where she was sitting, the tail sprouting from her butt was stuck in the floor, supporting her entire body.

“You have many talents.”

“Isn’t the relationship between devils and alcohol inseparable?”

“No, I’m talking about you doing circus tricks with your tail.”

“Ah. This?”

Kunat briefly turned her head to check her butt, then slowly flicked her fingers.

At the same time, two transparent wine glasses popped out of thin air.

Kunat, who caught the wine glasses before they fell, quietly put down the glasses and said.

“Were you staring at my butt? Hmm, I’m a little embarrassed…”

“…”

“How is it? Compared to Anna or Lucia?”

“Shut up and… pour the wine.”

Kunat smiled and filled the glasses with wine.