episode_0080

During the week, I usually eat lunch at school or nearby, so I rarely prepare lunch.

So, we eat light lunches on holidays. It’s even more so because there are only three of us and one of us is Sayaya, who tends to be quiet.

If you are talking about light food, it is noodles. If you eat a lot of vegetables, it is healthy food. Spicy food helps blood circulation and helps with dieting.

For that reason, the lunch menu became jjolmyeon.

It doesn’t matter whether the nitty-gritty truth is that noodles are high in calories because they’re a bunch of carbohydrates, or that sweet and salty condiments are bad for you in terms of both calories and sodium.

Saya helped me with the preparations. I want to get used to housework little by little, but I have been asked to not let Seha know about it if possible. That is why I only get help when Seha is not around.

Sayaka has a unique skill called [Incompetence]. At first, she made a lot of mistakes in the kitchen, so much so that I had to follow her around the whole time. She also used a surprising amount of recovery potions.

But now I can handle a knife normally and do simple cooking without any problems. It’s just slow.

If you think about it, it’s only natural, thought Suin.

She is always careful and attentive to people. It was the same when I saw her cooking. She observed diligently and put effort into reproducing it.

It may take time, but there’s no way your skills won’t improve.

Even though she doesn’t even have a master skill, Se-ha said that he became her slave the moment he saw her. He said that it was because he already knew Saya through foreknowledge, which means that it must have happened because he saw her trying not to give in to the limitations of [incompetence].

When he says, “You don’t have to push yourself,” he must be sincere. But he definitely likes people who push themselves.

“… Well, it’s not like I’m trying so hard to get that guy to like me?!”

I tried to imitate tsundere out loud. And I ended up giggling. I was aware that it was my own voice, but it sounded much higher and softer.

A body, a voice, and perhaps even a mind completely different from what I had long thought of as ‘myself’.

It can’t be helped that it feels like I’m acting, like I’m cosplaying. That’s probably why I can easily say things I wouldn’t normally say. In both good and bad ways.

I’m not a tsundere, but I’m not really doing this because I want you to like me. It’s more like the opposite. I’m not saying I want to be hated, but I’m more drawn to the word “punishment” than “reward.”

I shook my head to clear my mind of the thoughts. It was time to concentrate.

I ate lunch 30 minutes ago.

It’s my work time right now. I usually do it at night because I get mentally exhausted after work, but today is a holiday so I decided to do it during the day.

Even though it is a restriction, it does not require any particularly cumbersome preparation.

Put an appropriate amount of water in a suitable container, place your fingertips on it, and focus on the medicine you want to make. Then, the water will change and become the desired medicine.

It can be changed back into the form of a tablet or lotion. Most of it is in the form of a tablet for easy storage and portability, and the lotion form is just a small amount to be passed on to Aret.

After making all the medicines I wanted, I made some more. I was quiet for a while while I was organizing the names of the dead, but I thought I would need them if a similar situation arises again.

Every time I finished a task, I felt tired and had difficulty concentrating. Eventually, I would repeat the same process until my mind became so dizzy that I could not think of anything.

When you think of the status window, a list of system messages comes to mind. Every time you create a new medicine, you gain a small amount of experience. As you gain experience in [Medical Potion Creation], the types of medicine you can create increase, and the purity of existing medicines increases.

It really feels like a game.

Every time I see this, two thoughts come to mind.

I wonder how great it would be if there were such a ‘system message’ for everything. How convenient it would be if it could measure and display both the favorability of others and one’s own feelings.

Another is the things he did while intoxicated by the game-like feeling.

When I found out I was a Master, I felt like I was the master of the world, excited by the thought of getting revenge, and obsessed with earning experience points and unlocking new potions.

And the result is….

Suin closed her eyes. This time of making the medicine was the most difficult time for Suin.

Anyone can do cooking and housework anyway. When it comes to battles, the chairman and Yuna are overwhelmingly superior. Saya’s position is absolutely unbeatable.

That’s why making medicine like this is a rare moment when you can feel proud that you are needed.

But at the same time, it is also a time when you have to look back on things you have done in the past.

I’m glad I’m tired. I’m glad I’m dizzy.

Because you can quickly fall asleep without being haunted by recurring regrets.

▷▷▷▷▷▷▷▷▷▷▷▷▷▷▷

I slept for about an hour and woke up.

I was planning to clean up in the afternoon, so I went down to the first floor and saw that Saya and Yuna had already finished cleaning. I felt a little embarrassed that my work had been taken away from me, and Yuna let out a sigh.

“Just because you’re wearing a maid’s outfit doesn’t mean you’re a real maid… Why are you so restless because your cleaning duties were taken away?”

“That’s not it… .”

“I also think that Suin Yang is working a little too much. How about taking a break?”

“I had a good rest… .”

But it was no use.

The two of them made Su-in sit on the living room sofa semi-forcibly and then went up to the second floor to finish cleaning. They were considerate of her sleeping earlier so that she wouldn’t wake up to the sound of the vacuum cleaner.

I was wondering what to do and then I picked up my phone.

Come to think of it, it’s been a while since I’ve neglected a game I was so passionate about. Even when I was being bullied so much that I wanted to die, I never missed logging in repeatedly. The world is truly unpredictable.

I logged into my favorite mobile game. My streak of consecutive logins was broken, and I was given a meaningless item as my first login reward for the month. I felt like I had wasted my time and deleted the game.

“Ah… Seriously, why is it like this… .”

Maybe I should practice back tumbling too.

It was something I had decided on my own, but since I couldn’t do what I had planned to do, I suddenly felt awkward. I had trained quite intensely in the morning, so it was difficult to go to the training room, and studying… was out of the question.

If Se-ha gets down on his knees and pleads, I don’t know, but if not, I absolutely won’t do it.

I was staring blankly out the window when I suddenly came to my senses. I should prepare some tea so that the two of them can drink it when they come down… .

The moment I woke up with that thought, I realized that there were two people right next to me staring blankly at me.

“?!”

“I looked up in surprise,” Saya said with an embarrassed expression.

“Excuse me, Miss Suin. Would you like to talk?”

“Huh? Yes… .”

It’s normal to get nervous when you’re told to talk with a serious expression. Soo-in was no different, and all sorts of thoughts suddenly started to swirl around in her head.

It looks like he came down from cleaning the second floor, so maybe there was a problem on the second floor.

“Are you sick anywhere?”

“Yes? Yes. It doesn’t hurt anywhere.”

“Then, is there anything mentally difficult? Is it painful, difficult, or… .”

oh….

Suin flinched.

Strictly speaking, there is nothing that can be said to be bothersome or difficult enough to be a problem. However, if you ask if the current state is normal, it is also certain that it is not.

“There’s no such thing… .”

“I just sighed and looked out the window for 30 minutes.”

Yuna suddenly interrupted.

Suin opened her eyes wide. She had no awareness at all… .

“Do you feel depressed and depressed? Or do bad memories keep coming to mind… .”

I flinched at the worry-filled sound of Saya’s voice.

When a master looks at a slave, he also sees additional information. Is it possible that he sees that too, or is this just speculation?

“If there’s anything you noticed, please let me know. If you suddenly found out like before, you’d definitely be very flustered.”

Should I tell you? Can I really tell you?

Of course, Soo-in knew that Saya was a kind person. But, was it okay for him to tell her his true feelings? Wouldn’t it be uncomfortable or painful?

Suin hesitated for a moment before trying to clear her voice.

“That… I don’t know why, but these days, no matter what I do, I keep thinking about Se-ha. No matter what happens, I always end up thinking about that guy… I don’t know why either… .”

And from Saya and Yuna’s reactions, I realized that this wasn’t it.

Among the two who blinked for a moment, it was Yuna who spoke first.

“That’s because you like him, right?”

“Huh?!”

“Yuna… !”

Although Saya tried to stop her urgently, Yuna continued to speak, looking dumbfounded.

“Why are you surprised? I don’t understand your reaction… . You’re desperate to be of help in any way, and when you’re called out for something, you’re happy to death, but when you’re not, you’re disappointed. If it’s not because you like it, then what is it?”

“That, that’s… .”

It’s different from that.

It’s different from that kind of easy-to-understand, honest, and refreshing feeling. The feelings he has for Se-ha are definitely not like that. Se-ha knows that too.

But even while thinking that way, Suin couldn’t refute it. She felt that if she explained it this way and that way, it would turn out not to be as special as she thought.

Instead of the hesitating Suin, Saya spoke.

“Excuse me, Yuna. I think it’s dangerous to give names to other people’s feelings so easily. There must be a reason why it can’t be said so simply, and that’s why Soo-in is worried too… .”

“… I feel like I’m worrying more for no reason.”

Yuna made a gesture of stepping back while saying that. It wasn’t an issue of right or wrong.

Sayado essentially agreed with Yuna, but felt there was no need to talk about it now.

As Se-ha always says, feelings are complicated and difficult. Se-ha will answer about your feelings towards him.

Su-in felt relieved that the sudden hearing was coming to an end, but at the same time, she was curious about the purpose of this conversation.

“Excuse me, what was it you wanted to tell me?”

It’s definitely a worrying situation, considering I spent 30 minutes just sighing without even knowing anyone was there.

But when I actually told them the reason, they both seemed to have completely missed the point… .

After hearing that question, Sayaka looked at Suin and spoke in a cautious voice.

“Hey, that’s… . Suin Yang. I hope you listened without being surprised.”

“Yes, please go ahead and say it.”

Even though I was quite nervous just from hearing that announcement, I spoke as confidently as I could.

Then Saya told him what she had been worried about.

“This might be embarrassing, but… I was wondering if it might be time for my period.”

“… … … … … … … … … … … … … … Huh?!?!?!?!?!?!?”

Suin jumped at the unexpected word.

Saya continued speaking seriously, although her expression seemed somewhat troubled.

“If you think about when Suin Yang became the body she is today… I think it’s about time for it to start. I can’t say for sure because it seems to be different for each person, but usually, various reactions start showing up a little while before that.”

Saya explained why she thought that way.

First of all, the timing. I had heard from Se-ha that even if you become a woman through the female transformation drug, menstruation comes normally. Although there are cases where the condition fluctuates, if it is normal, then that time is getting closer.

The fact that he seemed to have no appetite lately (of course, excessive appetite is also a common reaction), that he became picky about the taste of his food, and that he seemed a little depressed were also reasons for my concern.

Of course, none of those explanations entered Su-in’s mind. If I said I didn’t think about it, I’d be lying. Because I saw Se-ha struggling.

But it’s another matter that it becomes your own work. All I could think was, along with a hollow laugh, ‘Is this true?’

I unconsciously placed my hand on my lower abdomen. It didn’t seem to hurt or anything, but… I don’t know about Se-ha.

According to my own reflections, it’s not that there were no signs, but it seems that I just endured the pain.

“Well, I know you might be a little surprised, but… If it’s okay, I’d like to tell you what to do… .”

“Ah, no! No, it’s okay! I’ll look it up on the internet! It’s not that Senior Saya is bad, but I don’t think I can stand it!”

Suin shouted that and ran up to the second floor.

Seeing him running up the stairs almost as if he was flying, Saya said, ““Be careful… .”” and then stopped herself.

Yuna tilted her head slightly.

“… I thought I accepted being a woman without any problems, so why is this happening?”

Maybe it wasn’t okay.

Saya muttered that to herself.

It’s always like that.

Maybe we can leave it alone for a while.

Maybe you’ve buried it so successfully for so long that you’ll even forget you buried it.

But at some point, they’re going to dig up the ground and demand that you pay off your debt.

▷▷▷▷▷▷▷▷▷▷▷▷▷▷▷

5pm.

Sister Elin didn’t show up for dinner, but Seha called before saying she would come. Suin said she was going to go shopping and went out.

Of course, I had already stocked the fridge yesterday, so my real purpose was something else: to buy sanitary pads.

Since I almost always wear a maid outfit when I’m not going to school, I often end up wearing the same outfit when I go shopping.

To avoid making the same mistake again, I took off my maid outfit and put on my regular clothes. I was so shocked when I heard that I might get my period, but I found it a little funny that I picked up my skirt so nonchalantly. It had been quite some time since I had even worn women’s underwear.

After arriving at the mart, I finished buying things to fill out the assortment and headed to my destination. I swallowed nervously as I looked at the sanitary pads lined up on one side of the shelf.

I don’t know for sure, but it didn’t seem like my period would start right away. But I thought I should prepare for when it really does start, so I came here to buy it.

In the past, I felt awkward standing in a place I had always ignored and passed by. I also felt like I was standing in a very wrong place.

But well… at least biologically it’s natural. Even if it makes things more complicated.

There were a variety of products and the descriptions were complicated, but I was able to quickly find what I wanted. It was mixed in with the trash I threw out at home.

I picked it up, guessing that it wasn’t useless since one of the other five was using it.

Suddenly a thought occurred to me.

I don’t know if I’ll actually use it or not, but I think there’s a possibility that I’ll end up using something similar to Se-ha.

And, while I was thinking of Se-ha, I felt like I couldn’t put into words what I was feeling… .

“Hello?”

Someone tapped his back, startling him and he turned around to see an unfamiliar face standing behind him. He remembered what he had said to Se-ha. There really is no end to bad relationships.

The one standing there was Jeong Yu-jeong.

“Oh, hello… .”

“You are Lee Soo-in. Do you buy things like this?”

“… .”

It’s quieted down now, but the issue of Su-in’s gender was a topic that caused quite a stir at Wolmyeong Military Academy. Now, everyone knows that she was once a boy.

It must have been interesting to see so many people choosing sanitary pads.

Suin didn’t know what to say.

However, Yoo-jeong asked, pushing her body in as if Soo-in’s silence was nothing.

“Don’t you know? It was originally a 2217 unit?”

“… .”

“That’s strange. We were in the same unit, but I don’t remember you at all. My boyfriend, no, my ex-boyfriend kept asking me if he didn’t understand.”

Su-in didn’t know what attitude to take toward Yu-jeong.

But Yoo-Jeong didn’t care about the continued silence and continued speaking in an extremely lively tone.

“Now that I think about it, I didn’t say anything. Last time I saw you, my ex-boyfriend was acting so weird. I’m sorry. Huh? Is it weird for me to apologize to that guy for something he did wrong?”

“… Sorry, I have to go.”

“Oh, yeah. Sorry.”

As she spoke, suppressing her emotions as much as possible, Yoo-jeong said this and moved away a little. As Soo-in let out a sigh of relief and was about to head to the checkout counter… Yoo-jeong, who had been standing still for a moment, ran over and grabbed one side of Soo-in’s shopping cart.

“Hey, you really don’t have anything to say to me?”

“… … … … … … … … … … … … … … … .”

“… … … … … … … … You might think I’m saying something weird, but… I feel weird when I see you… . I don’t know you for sure, but I feel like I know you… . Judging from what my ex-boyfriend said or wrote, I should know you, but I don’t… .”

What should I do?

Suin thought of Mongyeonhyang. If she uses this, she can cast a stronger suggestion than before. There is no backup called Master Command, but it will be able to correct Yoojung’s current contradictory state.

Or… should I just tell the truth?

The thought felt extremely tempting.

Should I do the same to Jung Yu-jeong as I did to Shin Myeong-jun? Should I tell her everything that happened to her, everything I did to get revenge, and then just let her go with the flow, no matter what?

However, Suin couldn’t choose either side. While she was thinking about it, the side that was waiting for the answer came to a conclusion first.

“Sorry. It sounds so weird, right? I know. But… I don’t know, but I keep feeling like I owe you an apology and gratitude… .”

“Thank you… Dani… .”

“Ah, what is this? You think I don’t remember, but there’s something I need to apologize for? Right?”

I felt like I had been hit in the face for a moment when I heard something I had never expected.

Considering the gravity of what was exchanged, an apology is not even appropriate. You may claim that with resentment, but you know that it is wrong.

And thank you… Is there such a thing as such a cruel jeer?

Su-in, who couldn’t believe what she had heard, glared at Yu-jeong. However, she didn’t seem to think that what she had said was strange or wrong.

At this rate, I’ll end up accepting that strange apology and gratitude.

Suin opened her mouth. She tried to say that it was a ridiculous misunderstanding, that she didn’t know what she was doing. But… .

“You shouldn’t cheat, right?”

With those words, he pulled a side of her hair with a mean gesture. However, Su-in unconsciously smiled and looked back at him.

Se-ha was standing next to me so naturally, as if she had always been there. He put his arms around my neck and pulled me into his arms.

When Se-ha, who had a considerable height difference, did that, Su-in’s head would be buried between his chest. In an instant, his head turned white and the words that had been welling up within him disappeared.

Yu-jeong’s face brightened when she saw Se-ha.

“Senior Seha!”

“Oh, yeah. I saw you last time you went to school, right?”

“Yes. At that time, Myungjun Oh… I’m sorry my ex-boyfriend made a mistake. My name is Jeong Yujeong… .”

Starting with that, he started spitting out words in a flurry. He clearly had a look of admiration for Se-ha. Se-ha smiled brightly and accepted Yu-jeong’s words, then said goodbye, saying that he would have to go at the right time.

After saying goodbye to Yoo-jung, whose expression of regret was obvious, I left the mart.

“She’s very active.”

“… Yeah. Bright, not distant from people, so skinship is common, and a bit insensitive… .”

This guy made me suffer to the point where I wanted to die, but then he thought it was just a joke.

Even though he knew there were empty spaces in his memory, he was calm as if he would soon remember.

“Did you finish work well?”

“Well… I don’t know if you know, but I’ve sorted it out. I called Senior Saya and she said you went to the grocery store, so I came to pick you up, but you were in an event battle. Should I have gotten in sooner?”

I glanced up at Seha’s face.

I shook my head, feeling an inexplicable sense of relief at the worry hidden inside the playfulness.

“No. It’s okay. I don’t know what I said then, but I’m sure I would have regretted it even if I had said something… .”

When Suin looked up, Seha also looked down at Suin. After looking down at Suin for a while without saying anything, Seha let out a sigh.

“Okay, okay. Okay. After dinner tonight, I’ll go and give you the extra money.”

“What?!”

“If you don’t like it, I won’t go… . Do you really hate it?”

“… .”

Suin thought.

This guy is the worst. He acts like he’s giving you a choice, knowing you won’t be able to refuse, and he embarrasses you.

Se-ha was so annoying that Su-in whispered with her face red.

“… No. I wish you would come… .”