episode_0075

075 – Surviving the Amazons # 2

“Hey, my friend Joy! Where are you going so early in the morning, carrying a lot of boxes?”

Early morning.

As I was about to board the company elevator, a familiar face spoke to me.

It was Markius, the department head of the Safety Management Team, which could be called the most powerful department even within this headquarters.

“Even carrying so many boxes and not losing your balance. Wow, Markius here truly acknowledges you! A competent man does everything well!”

Markius was constantly falling over himself praising me.

He would probably praise me even if I tripped and fell on the street.

More than 30 percent of the achievements I was unfairly credited for until I became a section chief at the headquarters probably had his stake in them.

Still, it was a welcome face for once.

“I’m temporarily transferring to another department. They say that with the newly introduced assistant manager promotion system, only those who have cultivated diverse work skills in various work environments can become an assistant manager.”

“That sounds tough? In the past, if you caught the eye of the ‘Ladies’ Association’, a promotion to assistant manager would somehow work out. But now, truly incompetent people can’t even step on the threshold of promotion, right?”

“That’s why it’s good.”

“You say that’s good? Well, for someone like you, Joy, no matter what department or what task you take on, for someone who can handle it perfectly, there would be no problem at all. Rather, it would be good to show off your various skills.”

Not at all!

In various tasks, I’ll show my incompetence in many ways.

As I was steeling myself with that resolve, the elevator dinged to a halt and we all boarded.

Press.

As I pressed the button for the 44th floor, Markius’s eyes lit up.

“The department you’re temporarily assigned to is on the 44th floor, I see. What team is it?”

“It’s the Welfare Team.”

“…What? Really? That can’t be.”

Markius was a thief in his previous life, and after death, he was a ruthless person to the extent that he managed to hold the position of department head even in the Safety Management Team, the powerful department at headquarters.

But for such a man to darken his face with tension, something was suspicious and strange.

“Why the Welfare Team?”

“I’ve only heard rumors, but they say unmarried men who go to the Welfare Team are virtually the same as ‘desk removal’.”

‘Desk removal’ is when they remove the desks of employees who are about to be fired, a punishment where they don’t give them any work.

If the company doesn’t give you any work, you might think, ‘It’s awesome to be a salary thief!’

But people will increasingly see that person as a ghost, and the person themselves can’t endure the humiliation and self-reproach of wasting time, so they end up quitting voluntarily, they say.

In other words, it’s a company version of being ostracized.

“Joy, are you really going to the Welfare Team? Something seems wrong. Of all people, it’s strange that you’re temporarily assigned to the Welfare Team.”

It was new for Marki, who always liked frivolous jokes, to make such a serious face.

But as he said, if an unmarried man going to the Welfare Team truly meant ‘desk removal,’ I could vaguely understand his expression and tense demeanor.

“Perhaps it’s retaliation for you poking at the secret weakness of the second wife because of the Ladies’ Association issue.”

Oh my, is this guy saying something that would cause big trouble if someone heard?

What did I poke about a married woman?!

Ding-.

At that moment, the elevator arrived at the 44th floor.

Soon, Markius patted me on the shoulder.

“Of course, if it’s you, you might easily overcome even this difficulty. Please, just stay alive.”

Whoosh-.

The door closed, and I stood alone on the 44th floor.

What I first felt was a fragrant flower scent spreading distinctly at the tip of my nose.

‘Is it a cosmetic scent?’

I didn’t intentionally find out what the Welfare Team did or what kind of people were gathered there.

I intended to just go and face it head-first, without preparation.

That way, I’d make frequent mistakes in the newly assigned tasks, right?

‘What exactly do they do there that it’s called a hell for unmarried men?’

Even though I had made up my mind to intentionally fail, I felt a little nervous.

If I were the type of employee who thinks, ‘I must work hard and get promoted!’, then perhaps now, with even greater tension, my heart wouldn’t just be pounding; I might even have felt like vomiting.

And so I arrived at the Welfare Team office on the 44th floor.

Click-.

As I opened the door and entered, the office scenery immediately came into view. The sight of desks and partitions neatly arranged was no different from the various departments I had seen before.

The only difference was that there were many various decorations.

‘Are these the paintings by ‘RUS’?’

The crayon drawings by Mr. Icarus, whom I met recently, framed here and there and decorating the office colorfully, was quite surprising.

Compared to the Headquarters Audit Team or the Happy World Penalty Enforcement Division, where there were only gloomy skull decorations, this kind of office scenery was quite different.

Since it’s the Welfare Team, is the employee welfare good too?

“It’s the new employee.”

“Was someone supposed to come today?”

However, as people stood up one, two, three—from their desks, I could clearly tell that something was wrong, because there were only women.

Among the nearly 100 Welfare Team employees, there were exactly three men.

97 to 3.

A female-dominated environment, denser than an espresso ratio.

‘Should I go back?’

Even for me, who had crossed all sorts of dangerous lines, I instinctively took a step back.

Why? Lately, whenever I got involved with women, I had never seen anything good come of it, had I!

But?

The women I had recently gotten involved with were mostly married women.

And in my opinion, the women in this Welfare Team were mostly unmarried women.

‘Since they’re not married women, it might be different.’

Step-.

I took a step forward.

“I am Section Chief Joy, newly appointed and assigned from Audit Team 1 to the Welfare Team. It’s a temporary assignment for about two weeks at most, but in the future….”

—that I look forward to working with you.

As I was about to say that, my mouth abruptly stopped.

Now, I felt like the god of opportunity had shown me his forelock.

I have to seize this!

“I don’t particularly intend to get along well with you all in the future. It’s a temporary assignment anyway. I’m not a person from this idle Welfare Team, but from the Audit Team, the elite of elites.”

“Huh? You, what on earth are you blabbering about?”

A reaction came immediately.

It was a woman with silver hair cut short, who looked like a lily of the valley.

The muscles of her crossed arms were more pronounced than mine.

On her desk nameplate, it was written ‘Assistant Manager Fantasileia’.

“What’s wrong with an idle team? Just because you’re from the Audit Team, a powerful department, I don’t know if you’re trying to ignore our Welfare Team now. If you act so arrogantly, you’ll get your comeuppance!”

In social life, is there anything as important as a first impression?

I had intentionally ruined that first impression.

And the effect was perfect.

The expressions of many women suddenly frowning was clearly visible to my eyes.

“What is this?”

“As soon as he arrived, he’s acting tyrannical.”

“He’s annoying.”

Whispering-.

Moreover, they each whispered among themselves so that I couldn’t hear them.

Ah-.

To think the voices cursing me would sound like such a sweet orchestra.

I feel like I’m about to awaken to a strange taste.

Even if useless Krauser suddenly got struck by lightning and awakened, returning to Orpheus’s form and sang, it would be less moving than this.

It was then.

“Section Chief Joy! Let’s go to the rooftop together and smoke a cigarette!”

Tap-tap-.

Someone tapped my shoulder.

###

Although it was an extremely female-dominated department.

There were also men, albeit rarely, like beans sprouting in a drought.

“I’m Hippomenes, a section chief of the Welfare Team. Section Chief Joy, I’ve often heard stories about you from my wife. Didn’t you dismantle the Ladies’ Association that tormented my wife?”

Hippomenes.

Hearing that name, a story from Greek mythology came to mind.

It was the story of ‘Atalante, the Huntress Princess’.

Atalante was a princess from the arts and physical education fields, as easygoing as a man and good-natured, so she was incredibly popular among men.

Atalante herself was bound by a vow of chastity, so she set these conditions.

—I will marry the person who wins a race against me! However! Anyone who challenges me and loses will surely die! Truly die!

In reality, many men raced against Princess Atalante, but they all lost and all died.

Then, a man carrying three ‘golden apples’ entered the race—.

Every time Princess Atalante overtook the man, the man dropped one golden apple from his pocket.

Winning against the princess who was distracted by picking up the golden apples, is the story of how he managed to marry her.

“Are you Mr. Hippomenes of the Golden Apples?”

“Yes. Fortunately, I met a capable woman, and I am indeed Hippomenes, the man who left his name in mythology.”

It was surprising.

Because their marriage story ended in tragedy.

Hippomenes’s ‘golden apples’ were actually given by Aphrodite, the goddess of love, for Hippomenes.

His newlywed life with Atalante was so stimulating and happy that Hippomenes ended up forgetting to give thanks to the goddess of love.

As a result, they were cursed, and the couple, Hippomenes and Atalante, transformed into a pair of lions and ended their lives by pulling the gods’ chariot.

“Why aren’t you a lion?”

Come to think of it, Mrs. Atalante, whom I met at the Ladies’ Association, wasn’t a lion either.

I did think it was strange at the time.

“Among the gods on Earth, electric cars became popular, so animal-drawn chariots lost popularity. Also, these days, there’s a lot of talk about animal welfare and such…. So we were cut.”

Because of the electric car trend, you mean you were able to escape the fate of being a chariot-pulling lion.

It was an interesting story.

However, Section Chief Hippomenes admonished me as if something more important than that existed.

“Section Chief Joy, I’ve also heard that you’ve been temporarily assigned to our Welfare Department because of the newly introduced assistant manager promotion system. But if you continue like this, you’ll be in big trouble!”

“Big trouble?”

“In our Welfare Team, you won’t be able to receive a good evaluation. First impressions are especially important in our team, and you declared that so confidently—. But it’s not too late yet.”

Rustle-.

Section Chief Hippomenes was handing me a long scroll.

“What is this?”

“This is my secret guide, recorded and researched, detailing how many factions there are in our Welfare Team, which factions are hostile to each other, and what power dynamics exist.”

It was a scroll thick enough to be a book.

“You investigated and recorded this all by yourself?”

“Though I’m always teased as a ‘kept man with a good wife,’ because I’ve lived my life benefiting only from women since my previous life, I have a way to survive.”

Hippomenes himself belittled himself as a ‘kept man’ or a man who ‘benefited from women,’ but I knew better than anyone that the position of ‘Headquarters Section Chief’ wasn’t something one could achieve simply by benefiting from one’s wife.

Whoosh-.

On the scroll, it was written which women belonged to which factions.

What hobbies they had and what preferences they had were detailed.

“Factions disguised under the name of ‘small groups’ are extremely numerous.”

“It’s the Welfare Team’s unique company culture. Since small group activities within the team are actively encouraged, and even activity expenses are supported by the budget, it can’t be helped.”

“But there are over 300 factions?”

“One person belongs to multiple factions. Employee A might be in Faction 1, which includes Employee B and Employee C. They might also be in Faction 2, which includes Employee F and Employee D, and so on.”

There are 100 people, but 300 factions.

Memorizing all of this would be torture.

In the female-dominated Welfare Department, to survive as a man, does that mean I have to memorize all these causal relationships?

Just thinking about it makes my brain feel like it’s twisting.

“Section Chief Joy, I also owe you for the matter with my wife’s Ladies’ Association, so if there’s anything I can help with, I’ll help you with all my heart. If I, of all people, were to give you a few tips—.”

“It’s fine. I’ll handle my own problems myself.”

Hippomenes’s tips, from a talent who survived 300 factions.

Surely, in this world of only women, these would be essential stories to survive as a man.

Therefore, rather, I shouldn’t have listened.

I returned to the office, leaving Section Chief Hippomenes, with undisguised worry in his eyes, behind.

And I shouted to everyone.

“As long as I’m here, from today, the Welfare Team must unite tightly as one family. Therefore, I will abolish all small groups created within the Welfare Team, and eliminate the budget invested in them.”

“Huh?”

“What are you talking about?”

“Abolishing small groups, you say.”

The murmuring people.

Towards them, I shouted, filled with even more enthusiasm.

“According to my calculations, even if only small groups are abolished, work efficiency will improve by more than double, and as a result, all Welfare Team employees will be able to receive performance bonuses of more than 300%!”

Of course, it was a lie.

I’ve never even done such calculations.

“Alright, Section Chief Joy. For one week, let’s try to dismantle all small groups and factions.”

At that moment, a woman sitting in the corner opened her mouth.

She was a woman with a stern way of speaking, whose business attire might have been plain, but with bronzed skin and the sheen of her brown hair tied back flowing smoothly as if oiled.

Department Head Hippolyta.

The important figure of this Welfare Team.

The name ‘Hippolyta’ was somewhat familiar to me as well.

‘In mythology, isn’t that the queen’s name of the Amazon tribe?’

What a great beauty.

And probably a married woman.

As I was thinking that, Assistant Manager Fantasileia unfolded her arms and raised an eyebrow.

“Unnie! Abolish small groups? Are you in your right mind?”

“We’ll try it for one week. As Section Chief Joy said, if there’s a result that increases work efficiency, it would be a good thing. But if, on the contrary, there’s no result, I will make sure you bear that responsibility clearly, in the Amazonian way.”