episode_0075

— Jung Siwoo: Is there anything you want to eat?

— Me: Just come.

— Jung Siwoo: Got it.

With that said, in his hands was a takeout cup filled with warm chamomile tea.

“What’s this? You came empty-handed.”

“I felt empty. Drink up.”

“Is it yours?”

“I already drank some on the way here.”

He sat on the chair next to the bed that Kang Hwi had placed for me, watching intently as I sipped on the chamomile tea.

“…Why are you looking at me like that?”

“No, I’m just watching rather than drinking.”

Am I some kind of zoo monkey?

…I thought bluntly, but being stared at quietly made me feel a bit better.

It was truly strange.

Kang Hwi and the maid corps stayed with me all day, tending to my swollen wrists. I hadn’t felt the sense of being alone in the past few dozen hours.

But as soon as Siwoo arrived, the situation changed completely. The pain that had been dominating my body had subsided halfway, and the throbbing headache was nowhere to be found.

It was comforting. Like entering a mother’s womb.

I think I know the reason.

The comfort through the interaction with the most similar self.

The excitement of having the man I love the most by my side.

The two intertwined to create extreme stability and happiness.

If physical contact is like detonating a bomb in a powder keg, then this is like dismantling explosives inside the powder keg. Slow, sluggish, but. A method to protect Chaewon’s purity safely and surely.

Protecting purity sounds strange, but this is an important task that must be postponed until I can accept it.

I don’t want to doubt Chaewon, but at some point, I started feeling like I had to shield Siwoo. Whether I’m making excuses by saying ‘Chaewon wanted it’ or if Chaewon really wanted my body to react that way, I started to confuse myself.

And then the moment of truth came by mistake. Can I stop Siwoo from attacking?

Chaewon, who was only expecting that situation, would be like an unarmed mid-open, but I am not. I want to open only when Chaewon has clearly taken control of my body.

So I have to be sure. I have to postpone it until I can accept that situation. I may have realized that I am a woman, but I still can’t accept spending a night with a man.

‘Come to think of it, I’m a minor…?’

I can hold out for at least a year with that excuse.

No matter how much Siwoo can’t resist his desire for me, a word like ‘minor’ will make him stop.

The problem is what comes next.

If Siwoo has become an assertive man who comes directly, hands me warm tea, and watches me drink it, will I still just watch quietly then?

Will he not press me so much that I have to endure it?

How long do I have to endure it?

I felt a chill down my spine in Siwoo’s intense gaze.

“It’s time to go back now.”

“It hurts.”

“It doesn’t hurt, so go.”

“…I have a private tutoring session with Baek Cheongha tomorrow.”

“You can go.”

“If you can’t go, let me know. I can go instead.”

With the risky Baek Cheongha scheduling Professor’s and Siwoo’s individual lessons for Saturday morning, Siwoo can indeed help with the tutoring if he wants to.

But I am the one who has received the order to separate you from Baek Cheongha.

My body will be fine after a good rest for a day. I know.

“Don’t worry, I’ll go to tutoring healthy as can be.”

“Hello….”

— …What is it?

“I’m sorry… You’re at the professor’s place right now. For tutoring later… Can you… go instead… for me…?”

I lost to menstrual cramps. Damn it.

— Got it. Don’t worry and rest well.

“I’m sorry….”

After finishing the call, I casually tossed my phone onto the bedside table and let out a deep sigh.

“Ughhh.”

After exchanging a glance with the maid who was watching over me, I sat down on the chair next to the bed.

“How are you feeling?”

“Like crap.”

“The first and second days are really tough. Miss 0 also took about two days off a month because of that.”

The world is so unfair. Why did God play such a cruel joke on the precious body that has to bear a child?

If I don’t get pregnant during the ovulation period that comes every month, I’ll continue to suffer in the future. What kind of threat is that?

“Getting pregnant in the first place is even more painful….”

No matter what choice I make, hell awaits.

Today is the day I feel grateful to all the mothers in the world for no reason.

“Would you like to take a painkiller?”

“I already took one earlier….”

“It’s okay to take two pills in the morning and evening.”

“Then I’ll take it….”

Even if I take the painkiller, the effect only lasts for a few hours. After that time passes, the pain starts again.

Some people don’t feel much pain to the point of being confused about the day. Why did Chaewon happen to fail in the game of chance?

Compared to this morning, things have definitely improved, but I feel so sad because it seems like this will continue until at least tomorrow morning.

“Ugh….”

“Swallow it well…. Is there anything you want to eat? I’ll bring it for you.”

“I don’t know….”

Suddenly, what came to mind was the unhealthy snacks and carbonated drinks that were famous for being bad for health.

I couldn’t spend a lot of money on snacks, so my choices were limited. Since I wasn’t someone who ate a lot in the first place, I often filled my meals with a bag of snacks and a can of drink.

Of course, the expensive ones were extremely expensive, so I actively used cheap products and bulk sales as much as possible.

“Gabja Chips and….”

Although I didn’t have a strong preference for carbonated drinks, if I had to choose the one I drank the most, it would probably be strawberry soda.

I didn’t drink it because I wanted to, but because there was a stock of strawberry soda in the fridge due to the time I stayed at the professor’s house. Later, I found out that this was a drink with a very divided taste.

But when you’re sick, you naturally crave the one you used to drink the most.

“Strawberry soda.”

Kang Hwi’s expression showed a hint of surprise at my unusual choice.

“Yes. Please wait a moment.”

As summer approached and the evening drew near, a red sunset hung in the sky outside the window.

It felt like the red light was hypnotizing me to sleep. I closed my eyes as if to comply. The drowsiness slowly spread, and sleep quietly crept in.

“Just a little…. I need to sleep.”

I probably won’t sleep for long anyway. It’s obvious that once the painkiller wears off, my stomach will ache.

When I opened my eyes again, the back pain was almost gone, but my body still felt heavy. However, my arms and legs moved freely, as if I had passed the worst.

I must have slept longer than I thought, as it was dark outside the canopy, and only the bright light from the lamp on the bedside table shone in.

As I groaned and sat up, I heard a sound outside the canopy.

“Are you up?”

It was Siwoo’s voice.

Now it’s like our own bedroom.

“What are you doing? You’re not going home.”

“I have to go home anyway. It’s better to see the sick person a little more before leaving.”

When I pulled back the canopy curtain, I saw a burst bag of snacks and two cans of strawberry soda on the bedside table.

The potato chips in the bag were already half gone. I looked at the crumbs of the snack on Siwoo’s lips and muttered irritably.

“My snacks….”

“I have more here.”

“….”

Following the man’s finger, my gaze shifted to the guest table, where there were six bags of potato chips stacked. But I only wanted to eat one bag.

“Seeing this, I must be right.”

Crunch. Chewing on the potato chips deliciously, Siwoo flashed a bitter smile.

“I’ve had enough of these starch chips. They’re good for filling up when you’re too lazy to cook.”

“That’s true.”

“Looking back now, how did I survive on just one bag of snacks while practicing like that? Is that why my body is all messed up?”

“It’s not as messed up as you think. If it was, you would have been gasping for breath while playing the piano.”

“Is that so.”

I sluggishly turned towards the bed.

Then Siwoo’s gaze landed on my chest and stayed there.

His gaze was so intense and unwavering that I couldn’t help but react.

“Why.”

“Huh? Oh, I didn’t say anything.”

“…?”

Lowering my head to look at my chest, I noticed that the front of my pajamas was unbuttoned. It seemed like I must have unbuttoned it in my sleep because I was feeling hot.

And I wasn’t even wearing underwear, was I?

I quickly adjusted my clothes and exclaimed, “Hey! You should say something?!”

“W-who said that?!”

Did he see it? Surely he didn’t see it, right? He only saw a little, didn’t he?

“How much did you see?”

“I didn’t see anything.”

“It’s all over your face.”

“Ugh.”

Siwoo tried to wipe the sweat off his face, but it was no use.

As a creature easily aroused by visual stimuli, even a small hint would have triggered his imagination.

“I didn’t mean to. I couldn’t help it because I was feeling suffocated.”

“Y-yeah. I heard that.”

Confirming that Siwoo’s gaze had shifted, I quickly buttoned up my shirt. Now it shouldn’t be visible.

“Phew…”

My body feels better than before.

I should eat the snacks and strawberry soda Siwoo brought and go back to sleep.

The crispy potato chips crumbled, filling my mouth with a salty taste.

Hmm, this unhealthy taste. It’s the best after all.

“…?”

But Siwoo’s gaze was still directed towards my chest. He wasn’t staring directly, but it was clear that he was stealing glances.

‘Did he really notice me peeking…?’

Chaewon, didn’t you say something earlier? You didn’t have to make me realize it like this.

‘Where is he looking so intently…’

When I looked down again, a thin piece of my pajamas was sticking out.

Given my familiarity with my own body, it took me less than a second to realize what it was.

My hand involuntarily hit Siwoo’s forehead.

“D-don’t look!!”