episode_0074

“You fool. Oppa, you’re a fool.”

I couldn’t even move my hands.

No, I couldn’t move my body at all.

Wrapped up in the blanket, I fell asleep while still bound, unable to resist, my lips sealed shut with another set of lips.

He was the type to attack mainly through atmosphere, so when there was no atmosphere from me, he would just leave with only a kiss, leaving me dazed as the day passed by.

Even in such a situation, his whispers of love as I tried to sleep gradually melted my hesitant heart.

“Mmm, it’s delicious. Thank you for the meal.”

“Mmm…”

Whether saying anything or not, Oppa, now relieved of exhaustion, ate the breakfast I made deliciously and got up.

“Later. Let’s do it later.”

“When exactly is ‘later’?”

I give him good food and supplements to keep his strength up. Where does all that energy disappear to?

“After work… once the busy period is over. Let’s have a good time then.”

“…Vacation?”

“Yeah.”

“Sigh… Alright.”

Work. He definitely won’t stay still.

After washing up and dressing appropriately,

“…Make sure to save some energy for later.”

“Yeah. I’ll be back.”

He adjusted his tie and tidied his suit neatly.

Oppa looked lively on his handsome face, which seemed to only see me as cute.

“Have a good day.”

After a brief kiss, I saw him off.

That’s right. The anger has already dissipated. How could I get mad at that face?

I’m just a fool who only looks at Oppa. A fool.

“Sigh… I’m the fool here.”

Stretching, I began what needed to be done.

I received a message saying I could take it easy today. Therefore, today feels empty compared to yesterday when I was busy.

Although I should be rushing around right now, I feel a strange sense of peace as I bask in the warm sun.

At times like this, when Oppa works hard while I seem to be playing, I feel a bit guilty. Maybe that’s why I want to have a baby.

If that happens, I will undoubtedly become busier than anyone else.

“Sigh…”

Perhaps Oppa thinks it’s best if I don’t work, but that’s his opinion. However, since I only have Oppa, maybe I should follow along.

“Hmm… Everyone seems busy.”

It’s probably because it’s a weekday. Even though I send messages, everyone reads them and leaves short replies.

Everyone seems busy. Suah unnie unexpectedly has a social life, and Suhyun unnie is always busy… Yeonae unnie said she wanted to meet outside at least once, but she said it wasn’t possible.

Hyekjin is… we’re not that close yet, meeting mostly for work-related matters, and she’s probably working right now.

Everyone seems to be working. I’m the only housewife.

“Hmm…”

I want to work, but can I work with this frail body? I can’t imagine where I could work with this weak body.

When I wake up early, I feel like I should work as a day laborer, but on days when I have to lift something heavy, my back, not to mention the rest of my body, doesn’t feel up to it.

I may not be able to carry it, but that day, my whole body will ache so much that I won’t be able to get up the next day. Trying my hand at modeling due to my appearance was equally challenging.

Relying entirely on Oppa, I wonder if I can only live by doing things that he likes. That’s partly why I try to do everything that pleases him.

Since I can’t work, I’ll satisfy Oppa.

By keeping track of our expenses and cutting unnecessary costs, I fill in the gaps that Oppa, who works hard, might overlook.

A wife… I’m a wife. We haven’t even filed our marriage certificate yet, but I’m a prospective wife.

“Mmmph…! Sigh…”

I want to create a talk room or something.

In that room, there was still something left unresolved.

I threw away what I had written, and sold the unused items by roughly checking the internet prices and lowering them by about 20%.

Honestly, it felt a bit like finding money in a garbage dump.

Still, it felt somewhat balanced financially.

Based on a 75-liter trash bag, exactly 10 bags were filled.

Some rooms were quite large, and maybe it was because clothes were included.

Since it didn’t seem likely for them to return, I found myself hoping they never would.

Let’s put an end to unhappiness now.

I want to live happily with my brother.

Even though I had already finished my work, while still jotting down notes in the account book, a forgotten thought crossed my mind.

“Oh, right.”

A small-scale wedding…?

They said it would cost more.

It’s supposedly a woman’s dream… but I don’t really understand that.

If everyone who knows me came to congratulate me, maybe for a month.

But here lies the problem.

I know that person, but that person doesn’t know me.

My life as a woman after becoming one is starkly different from when I was a man.

Hearing that I am getting married and coming over, only to find a bride wearing a wedding dress with a name slightly similar to mine, even I would think, “Did I come to the wrong place?”

So, only those who know me now will receive wedding invitations…

“…Will it be okay?”

Dad… he was always taciturn, probably wouldn’t talk about family matters.

Even if Dad was very quiet, he must have had at least a few friends.

You might wonder why he has two daughters.

This too, unless spoken of, would remain unknown.

And… since there are no people around.

While typically household members would attend, we barely have any interaction with relatives.

I don’t really understand ancestral rites, we rarely meet, and recently, it can be said that we haven’t met at all.

Unless countless means many, we haven’t had the chance to count, let alone meet.

Now, the number of people diminishes even further.

Perhaps it will be filled with my brother’s relatives.

But… does my brother have relatives…?

It seems likely… but who will come?

Unni’s friends… I’m even more unsure, and Ji Hyuk’s friends…

Thinking about a wedding makes me even more uncertain.

I didn’t have a reason to think about this, just expected to get married around thirty… and thought, ‘Oh, so this is how it happens!’

When my brother arrives, I’ll have to organize things again.

“…Should I eat some food?”

I’m not particularly hungry, but the time points to lunchtime.

I don’t really want to eat, but my body, being annoyingly peculiar, keeps losing weight if I don’t eat, so I must eat.

As always, having lunch without my brother feels lonely.

Even playing videos on my phone to fill the silence doesn’t erase the loneliness.

“Oh… like this?”

Talking to myself to lift the sinking mood.

It’s been a while since I watched dramas, and these days, I’ve been mostly learning makeup.

It’s hard to believe that I can transform into a completely different person from my original face, so I’ve been trying it out.

There seems to be a lot to buy because the makeup products look insufficient.

Following a full makeup standard, going a bit lighter should suffice.

The makeup table was filled with cosmetics for a reason.

It’s a bit extreme.

“…I’m full.”

After finishing about half of a bowl of rice, I no longer feel like eating.

It may seem a bit excessive, but when I’m with my brother, I tend to eat a lot of side dishes along with a bowl of rice, so it’s normal.

It’s just that I can’t eat properly without my brother.

“Oh.”

Both my brother and I enjoy it, and perhaps we are looking for a good time that we can foresee into the future.

“Ugh….”

Don’t want to.

Should I do it?

The dumbbells, hands that have experienced it at least once.

Within that one experience, the memory carried at least about 6kg.

“Heavy…yes.”

Heard about them rolling around the house, but it didn’t sound as obvious as it used to be.

Gave up, rolled the dumbbells and placed them back in position.

Thinking about how to increase strength and stamina, push-ups came to mind.

“Phew….”

Seems like push-ups won’t work anymore.

This was somewhat of a matter of pride.

Even if done on knees, might manage a few, but honestly…it’s a bit tough.

“One…! Two…!”

Feeling the strong force pressing down, eventually ended up doing it on knees.

Surely couldn’t have done even one.

“Exhausted…ugh….”

Called out five, tried to do more, but the trembling arms were slowly giving in.

“Oh….”

I hate exercising the most.

*

“Oppa!”

After passing through boring, empty, and lonely times, when oppa returns, it feels like time speeds up again.

Want to do everything you desire, but can’t.

“Yeah. Were you okay?”

Feeling melted by the warm laughter.

It would be nice to stay with oppa like this.

“I’m fine just staying at home. I worry about you the most, oppa.”

“Me?”

“It’s cold. Come in. Keep holding me.”

Time flies by when oppa is around.

Having dinner, complimenting the food, when oppa showers, it’s probably around 6:30.

Bedtime is at 10.

Talking and playing with oppa doesn’t even last for three and a half hours.

But there’s nothing more to touch upon.

Everything is important.

Work, meals, shower.

Even though all the necessary things are in place, it turns out like this.

“Oh. Oppa.”

Lying on the bed, just stayed quietly next to oppa.

Because oppa seemed tired without any particular reason.

Still, things need to be done.

“Yeah?”

“I made a list for sending out wedding invitations before the wedding. Would you like to take a look?”

“Yeah. Where…um um. Ah. My relatives and friends?”

“Yes!”

“As for friends…they might come if invited, but probably won’t stay long. And colleagues might make time during lunch break to come and go. And relatives…well, they’re relatives.”

At the mention of relatives, oppa seems to be pondering carefully, stroking his chin.

“It’s better to ask Dad about this.”

Although he came home, he hasn’t had many conversations, he picked up his phone along with the words implying so.

“People on TV don’t come to these things, right?!”

“Oh…they’re just businessmen.”

Ah, I want to react, but honestly, I don’t know.

It might seem a bit odd for those who seem relatively ordinary to be seated next to people who seem out of place here.

But then again, my sisters or Ji-hyuk oppa…

Why don’t I have any friends? Can’t think of anyone other than my sisters.