episode_0074

“Why…?”

Yuhee Ah’s head turned around. Her neck, bent almost at a right angle, shook strangely. Even though her twisted joints made a creaking sound, her voice was as calm and quiet as usual. Like the ticking of a time bomb just before it exploded.

Her face was completely covered by thick, long black hair. The tangled black forest that reached down to the back of her thighs and hips was chaos itself.

A black pupil peeking through. An eye. Only one eye was visible, turned up, staring at Shihyuk. The black pit-like endpoint, where there were only black and white without any blood vessels in the whites of the eyes, was standing out like a black moon that darkened the night that came to the blacksmith shop.

When Shihyuk came to his senses, all the colors in the basement had disappeared under the unclean black moon, leaving only a tainted blackness. The darkness that had been holding its breath around her had returned once again.

Yoo Hee-ah, standing alone in the darkness, looked like a porcelain doll abandoned in an alley at night. She looked incredibly beautiful and lovely, but she was definitely not human. There was an uncanny valley that made anyone who saw her feel creepy.

No, she didn’t seem like the same person, let alone a living creature. It was so strange that I briefly wondered if she had the same red blood flowing through her as me.

However, Sihyuk did not back down. He faced the darkness head on.

“Aren’t you sick…? Are you in pain…?”

“I was in pain. I was in pain.”

I had no intention of denying the past. That was right. It was painful. It was miserable. No matter how hard I tried, it was a turning point, and no matter how hard I tried to change my mind, I was at a standstill. I was frustrated. The laughter and ridicule of others were still vivid in my eyes and ears.

Those years of suffering, it would be difficult to express them in words, and even if I tried to write them down, I would run out of space. Even if I spent a thousand nights, would I be able to explain them all?

Even if I tried to vent my sorrow to others, my tear ducts had already dried up a long time ago.

“Didn’t you feel resentful…? Didn’t you feel wronged…?”

“I resented it. It was unfair.”

There was no way it wouldn’t happen. Why me, why can’t I open the [Status Window] that other Awakened people have from the beginning?

I buried my face in my pillow and sobbed as I prayed to God. From now on, I will brush my teeth well. I will not think about wanting to eat candy. I will not want to run around. So please fix the broken me.

He fell asleep while praying, and when he opened his eyes, he was able to freely use all kinds of [Skills]. He created a sparkling and wonderful treasure that made his teacher’s mouth water. He defeated the evil villains he had seen in cartoons and saved the world.

But how did it feel when you woke up in the morning sunlight and realized that it was all an illusion? When everything you had held in your hands, even in your dreams, disappeared?

I looked up to the sky and threw my resentment and spat on the ground. If God was in front of me, I would strangle him. I would roll on the floor and struggle in frustration.

If I were to set aside all the accusations, hatred, slander, and gossip I have received so far, I could fill this entire basement with just the scraps of language I have rebuked myself with. If I were to weigh the sighs I have let out, they would be worth more than this body.

“Then, isn’t it the same…? You understand me too, don’t you…? We both came this far…? What’s the difference…? Why don’t you accept it…? Why don’t you try to ‘fall higher’…?”

“… … .”

Yoo Hee-ah, who had taken a step closer, froze when Shi-hyuk took a half step back. This was because she understood the meaning.

He neither denies her nor affirms her. He knows and understands her pain, but he does not accept it. He does not become tainted by her thoughts. He does not acknowledge it. He rejects it. He does not go further. He does not break down further. He does not fall further.

Why…?

“You’ve been breaking common sense and hanging on, haven’t you? You’ve sacrificed, emptied, discarded, cut, and cut to achieve your dreams, and finally achieved the results of all that struggle? Why don’t you try to wield the power you’ve achieved to your heart’s content? Haven’t you continued to move toward your goals so far? So why are you drawing a line? Why are you trying to settle for where you are now? You can do more, more. I know. You deserve to go higher. So why do you stop at the very end? No, it’s not the end. There’s no end. You have to keep grinding and polishing. You have to ignore everything and move forward, just as you have done all these years. I affirm you. Sihyuk can do it. Don’t try to run away or hide. Sihyuk can create the best and worst works that will make everyone tremble in fear. You can break the rules and fit only your justice into the world! So why? Why? More. Why don’t you pursue it to the limit, to the ultimate?”

“… … .”

Ignoring Yoo Hee Ah, who was talking nonsense in a panic, Si Hyuk looked down at his hands. Even though he had gained enlightenment and his body had changed, this was the part that had changed the least. Thick and rough.

The skin and joints that touch when holding and handling something, as if wearing gloves, were thick and red.

It was the hand of a craftsman who had focused only on making things, refusing everything else.

Looking back over the years, I’ve tried to break down walls, free from all distracting thoughts, and only strive to create better equipment.

Perhaps, it could be as she said. He might be content with his current position. Unlike the past days when he was devoted to his work, isn’t the current Sihyuk spending much less time in the blacksmith shop? Isn’t he trying to go out to meet people and get to know them?

What. Is there a need to keep in mind heroes or anything? Is there a reason to be so attached to human values? Whether it’s a sword for protection or a knife for killing, shouldn’t it be made only for cutting and slicing?

Rather, wouldn’t it be okay to continue to be reborn only for the sake of the best and performance, without being swayed by anything, without being influenced or obsessed, like we have been for the past 20 years?

If you don’t try to fix it, but instead sublimate all your broken hearts into materials and burn them for your own goals, if you treat everything in the world as worthless and cut it all out and ignore it, if you struggle like that, it may be difficult, but you may reach the ‘ultimate’, the ‘best work’, much more easily than now.

but,

But that’s it.

“Is there a way to do that?”

“… Yes?”

“Is there any humanity there?”

What is at the end? Even if you reach that highest point, what remains on that desolate peak?

Although suffering was the most important thing, it was not all that made up Shihyuk. There was definitely some joy among what made him who he was.

There were people who supported and protected Sihyuk. There were people who recognized him. In his worn-out and empty heart, their support and love remained like hardened honey.

It was a precious feeling that would not rot even if the past twenty years had passed by in a hundred or a thousand years. He never wanted to turn it into something worthless or use it as material.

So, Sihyuk was able to advance toward the final goal that no one had been able to reach, using human values as a light in the dark vast ocean. It may shake occasionally in the rough wind and rain. The light may also fade. But-

-It hurts, but let’s cheer up together.

Surely, you will be able to rise again.

Shihyuk’s flesh and blood were filled with Baekhyun alone, and the banner was raised by the old man Gong. And, by his side, there was a wild flower that would remain pure forever.

That was the turning point, the crossroads. Up until then, the two had clearly been intertwined, but now, Si-hyuk and Yoo-hee were clearly running on parallel lines. No, maybe even more so.

because.

“I may be similar to Hee-ah, but I can never be the same.”

… … .

“… Aha.”

The darkness laughed.

“Ahahaha, hoohoohoo, ahahaha, heehee. Woohoohoohoo, ahahaha, heehee, hee, haa- Is it right? Is it humanity? Is that all you can cling to when it comes to that? Useless, worthless, meaningless. Why should you be tied down to that? Breaking through, breaking apart. You should break even what you already have and make it zero, but you are still swayed by such human things. I cannot help but lament.”

“… … .”

Shihyuk remained silent even after hearing the jeers and laughter.

There was no need to add more words now. The road had already split into two, and although they had the same beginning, they ended far apart, on opposite sides of the universe.

Asura, who had abandoned his senses and walked the path of adultery, criticized him for still not being able to escape from people.

“If you have enough answers in yourself, in me, why do you seek answers from others? Do you seek meaning in something that is worse than a dry stick of shit? If there is a wall, break it down. If you have reached a state, step on it and move on to the next. If you have enlightenment, break it down and hang yourself again! More! More! More! You must move forward! Why are you obsessed with humanity, with emptiness? If it is for a purpose, if you have a cause, you must do anything! If you see the Buddha, kill the Buddha! If you meet the patriarch, kill the patriarch! If you see the Arhat, kill the Arhat! If you meet your parents, shouldn’t you kill them and move on?!! Answer me!!”

“… … .”

The absolute difference in values that cannot be backed down. The steps of a fallen emperor. The will of a lone general. No matter how much you compare it to the opinions of the ancients, its meaning has long been misinterpreted. It is just empty talk that is used as an excuse to justify one’s own legitimacy.

Yoo Hee-ah had already started from herself and tied a knot with herself. Like drawing a circle with a brush, she had already decided the end from the beginning.

That’s why ○.

There is no need to move the brush any further, as there is only darkness ●.

Shihyuk realized it in the middle of her rambling. That’s why he doesn’t say anything. No words can reach her anymore.

In the end, the only thing left was the purpose, and the person crossed the line and ended up ruined, and that was the result. Shi-hyuk sincerely sympathized with Yoo Hee-ah.

“… Only you, please don’t look at me like that.”

After screaming and wheezing, she realized the meaning in his eyes and growled again in anger.

Her eyes, which had been biting fiercely, suddenly turned sinister. Her bright red tongue licked her lips as if she had remembered something good, and the corners of her mouth hung over her ears. Because.

“Even if you say such nice things, I know the truth. After all, no matter how dishonest it may be, Sihyuk is just like me.”

“No, that’s-”

Because Yoo Hee-ah still had a good way to shake up Shi-hyeok.

“The reason you changed the shelf is because of the items that came out here, right?”

“uh-”

How.

“That which mocks the world of justice. I have seen with my own two eyes the crystallization of all kinds of injustice overflowing. What, why did you think I came here first? Isn’t it too shameful to say that that vile thing came from the house of a blacksmith who was searching for humanity and righteousness?”

It worked. Yoo Hee-ah, who had regained her composure while looking at the shocked Si-hyuk, smiled broadly. As if it was more enjoyable than ever to finally insult and defile Si-hyuk, who had stood firm without giving in.

Clearly, the thought that he had fixed it again was nothing more than a sweet illusion of Shihyuk. Just as a broken window cannot be put back in place, or water spilled on the floor cannot be completely collected.

It was clearly an irreversible mistake, made by a combination of coincidence and fate.

Yoo Hee-ah walked lightly towards him, who had become as hard as a stone, as if she was walking through a flower garden. Then, she started to flirt around Si-hyuk and chatter as if she was pretending to tease him.

“Hey, Sihyuk. Do you think I just left it there after seeing it? Yeah… When you put it away, didn’t you feel something different…? Like… .”

She rolled up the sleeves of her baggy training suit. Then she lifted the bandage that Shi-hyuk had wrapped around her hand a few days ago and showed the inside. It was so vicious that the red, scabbed evidence was still faintly visible on Soo-ra’s palm.

It’s not a burn or a bruise –

“Hasn’t it decreased by this much…?”

His eyes sparkled with flame.

“… Where did you hide it?”

“Hehe, it’s a secret… .”

“… … .”

“Are you curious… Oh… ?!”

Kwaang! Shihyuk grabbed the woman who was flirting around him by the collar and roughly slammed her against the wall.

The blacksmith, who had only used his power for craftsmanship and had never once used it on others, was threatening someone for the first time. The intense anger that was bursting out through his broken emotional line was pouring out towards Yu Hee-ah.

That crystal was that dangerous. A creation with no other meaning but the sole intention of destroying it.

If anyone can handle it-

If the wrong person creates things-

If used for the wrong purpose –

What on earth is going to happen?

“Say it.”

“This is good… . I should have done this a long time ago… . Do you know… ? This is the first time you approached me first, and spoke to me informally… ?”

But she barely blinked at that. Her back should have hurt from the rough bump, but she was smiling as if she was enjoying the pain. Her body was floating and her throat was tight, but she was in ecstasy.

“Awesome… . Can you do more, more…? I’m okay with it, as long as it’s Sihyuk… .”

Yoo Hee Ah quickly moved her hand and lifted his other hand and placed it on her neck. I tried to shake it off, but I couldn’t. It was an incredible strength. It was by no means inferior to Si Hyuk’s. It was perhaps even more monstrous.

While he was surprised, her other hand ran up his arm like a snake coiling around a tree and caressed the back of Shihyuk’s neck.

“If it’s Sihyuk… I’ll gladly die. Let’s kill each other once… ?”

“… … .”

Strength began to build in each other’s hands.