episode_0070

Lumiang, who had been comforting his empty stomach with the soup that Ariel had made, fell asleep again under the shade of the afternoon, and we, huddled together around the campfire, were discussing the current situation.

“Huh… . So, you mean that Prince Daron tried to kill the Grand Duchess, failed, and ran away… That’s what you’re saying.”

“… How could you do such a shameless thing? That was bad. Really. ”

I gave a rough outline of what I heard from Lumiang, and lastly.

“And I think maybe Deron is looking for the Archduke.”

He also told us about the flow of events that will unfold in the future.

“What…? Are you trying to kill the Grand Duchess?”

“I guess so.”

He nodded in response to Ariel’s astonished question.

Rachel, who had been listening quietly, turned her gaze to the sleeping Lumiang and spoke.

“If you don’t help, you’ll either starve to death or be killed.”

“That’s what it is.”

If the Grand Duke had not taken any action, Lumiang’s death would have been no different from an unofficial sentence.

If it’s Deron, he’ll be looking for you with his eyes wide open.

Of course, we don’t know if the Grand Duke is pursuing Deron, or if they have already captured him and locked him in the dungeon of the Grand Duke’s castle.

I wish that were the case, but even so, it was clear that abandoning Lumiang in this land of death was against human nature.

“How come… why is it so quiet? If the Grand Princess is in this state, the entire Northern Territory should be in an uproar.”

“… I guess the great Duke Logan doesn’t want to make a fuss.”

“Why on earth…?”

The lender asked, but no one could answer.

Only the people of the Grand Duke’s family would know whether they are not looking for it or cannot find it.

Only Duke Logan knows why he chose silence and stillness.

All that could be said was that if she was not helped now, Lumiang would die alone in this abandoned land.

But if the sword called Deron was sharpening its ugly edge, then helping her might put the members at risk, so the members’ opinions were of the utmost importance.

I saw Lumiang lying down quietly, asleep.

His arms and legs are covered in bruises and cuts.

It really must be a strange life.

A life that suffered as a victim of violence and abuse, and almost ended in a lonely death in this abandoned land, with even the desire to escape it trampled.

I was proud of my previous life as a ‘strange life’, but compared to Lumiang’s life, it felt like a drop in the bucket.

It felt like the world was trying to force her into something.

And I couldn’t help but feel heavy-hearted because it seemed like my abstention had contributed to that strange life.

“Everyone, what should we do?”

When asked a question while looking at the unit, Rachel answered first while looking around the area.

“If you have a pursuer, it’s best to avoid staying in one place for too long.”

Then the lender answered.

“I heard from the hunter that there is a large village called Rugen not far away. I think it would be a good idea to buy a cart there and take the Archduke there. It would also avoid outside attention.”

Finally, Ariel nodded and answered confidently.

“If it’s a big town, you can get some highly effective medicine. I can boil it and give it to you!”

The answers were without any concern about what would happen if someone expressed concern about helping Lumiang.

To help or not to help.

They were members who had excluded the latter case from the beginning, and went a step further and answered with a pleased smile to the members who gave the answer to the question of ‘how’ to help.

I guess I worried for nothing.

“Okay. Then let’s move right away.”

Whether or not to take Lumiang to Grand Duke Logan was a question for later.

Because I haven’t heard the parties’ opinions.

First of all, it was important to move her from place to place to prepare for any possible danger.

It won’t be too late to hear the parties’ opinions there.

After finishing our discussion, we packed up our campsite and headed straight to a village called Rugen.

Each carrying their own burden.

**

“asleep.”

I’m going to die… .

“Just die. It’s helpful for people like you to disappear.”

know….

I know… .

So don’t rush me.

《You’re just a nuisance to the people you care about. Why, do you want to lose someone precious to you again?》

…I don’t want to lose.

No more, no one.

《Yes. That means you die. The longer your lifespan, the shorter the lifespan of someone precious to you. Do you want to live while eating away at the lifespan of someone precious to you?》

I don’t want to do that.

That’s why I ran away.

So stop… .

Stop bothering me… … .

“What are you delaying? There’s no point in dragging it out. Just jump off the cliff. Or cut your wrists with a piece of glass.”

… … There’s no rush.

Now, I’m alone.

There’s no one there.

“Why, do you want to live after ruining other people’s lives? It’s funny. Really.”

I’m dying… .

There isn’t much time left now… .

stop….

Just leave me alone and let me rest.

《You really have no shame at all? Ronika died because of your curse, and Marien died because of your curse. And yet you, do you want to live?》

I didn’t want to be cursed… I didn’t want to be cursed.

It wasn’t my fault that I got caught.

I was only four years old.

I was 4 years old and didn’t even know who I was.

I was a four-year-old kid who didn’t even know what a curse was or what a monster was!

《So? Anyway, you’re the one who’s cursed, right? You killed Ronika and Marien, right?》

……under.

okay.

that’s right.

I killed him.

So now I’m dying too.

What more could you possibly want?

《There’s no point in wasting time. You want to rest? There’s an easy way to rest that we all know.》

…okay.

I will die for you.

Then that will work.

“That’s right. Cut your wrists with the shards of glass you’ve grabbed. Now, it’s all over. You don’t want this miserable life, do you? ”

… .

… … .

… … … .

《What are you hesitating for? Are you really funny? Did you really want to live?》

Ugh… .

“You didn’t want to die, but you kept making such a disgusting noise about wanting to die?”

Ugh… … .

scared….

Dying is so scary… .

And dying because you want to die and dying because life is so hard are different…

Who is happy to die… … .

Ugh… .

Me too, I wanted to live like everyone else… … .

《Are your dreams too wild? You can never be happy. You can never live. That is your fate.》

Ugh… .

I want to live… .

I wanted to live too… .

I don’t even hope to be happy.

just….

I want to live without pain… … .

As Marien requested, I didn’t want to get sick… … .

So, please… .

Stop nagging me to die… .

I’m not dying because I want to die… No… … … .

Already lonely… .

Because I am dying alone… .

*

I opened my eyes.

From that day on, when his weakened soul and worn-out mind were engaged in an endless tug-of-war with another self, Lumiang opened his eyes.

I felt a vague sense of floating.

It is visible in the hot field of view.

The scenery in the dense forest sways like waves according to a certain rhythm.

It goes up and down, then up again and down again, passing slowly.

It was a rare sight to see a green forest, and the forest felt like flying in the sky.

I felt warmth.

It felt like I was holding something in my arms, a warm sensation.

And then I heard a small vibration from the warm wall I was leaning my head against.

“Is that it?”

“Wow, thanks to moving quickly, I can see the entrance to the village. I almost walked at night. Hehe.”

“… Renderer? It’s nice to see you so confident, but I wish you wouldn’t take the lead in the future.”

“Huh, heh heh… . Cow, I’m sorry. I clearly said it was that way… … .”

What could it be?

Why do I feel like I’m floating in the sky and why do I feel a warm sensation?

It doesn’t even look like a fire has been lit.

It doesn’t even seem like it’s sunny noon.

What on earth is this warm wall?

And why is this warm wall carrying me?

Whose arm is it that supports me as I fall down, down, down?

“Your Majesty? If it’s difficult, I’ll carry you.”

“… Now that I can see the entrance to the village? It’s obvious that you’re trying to place a spoon on the already prepared table. Master.”

“… … It’s a pity.”

“Really?! Rachel! If you feel bad, carry me-! My legs hurt.”

“I only help my disciples. Young-ae, you too can become my disciple and roll along… .”

“My legs are completely healed!”

The cheerful sounds heard noisily.

It was a clear sound that seemed to cleanse my dirty ears that had been forced to listen to nothing but crying for dozens of days.

And the warmth I feel from the arms supporting my buttocks and the back carrying my body.

It was a warm warmth that seemed to melt away the past days when I had to shiver in the bitter cold for dozens of days.

“… … .”

Ugh.

Tears welled up in my eyes.

Everything I see is beautiful.

Everything I hear is lovely.

I can’t believe everything I feel.

Tears welled up in my eyes.

Even though I had refused the help, I felt so moved by the help that was coming my way that I felt so disgusted and so pitiful that tears welled up in my eyes.

Lumiang buried his face in the wide wall and had to cry quietly.

“… … .”

and.

Elden, who had been following behind the group, slows down silently and puts some distance between himself and the group so that Lumiang can cry comfortably.

So that you can cry as much as you want.

Let all the sorrow inside you pour out on my back.

Elden, who had made a distance, began to walk slowly towards the entrance of Rugen Village, following Lumiang’s sobbing.

Damn it.

Damn it.