episode_0068

“I’m going crazy. I’m crazy for leaving like this… ”

My older sister brought a rustling envelope, sighing as if her head was pounding.

He seemed certain that the delivery man must have found it strange that he just left without a bra, with the kiss mark clearly visible on his neck.

“Whatever, I don’t want to meet that person again.”

“Yes, but… It’s a bit like I just saw it.”

“It’s okay. are you okay. I say I’m fine, but what’s wrong?”

“Yes, right?”

It was a sister who had a lot of unnecessary worries. To appease my sister, I told her it was no big deal, and she was putting down the delivered items on the table near the kitchen and taking them out of the envelope one by one.

The caramel macchiato I chose was placed in front of me, and the iced Americano, chocolate cake, tiramisu cake, and two macaroons that my sister chose were placed in front of me.

“Eat this.”

Although I said I like sweets, I didn’t expect them to give it to me this seriously, so I was given a chocolate cake and a macaron in front of me, behind the caramel macchiato.

After sighing, I opened the plastic packaging and put the macaron in my mouth, and the rich sweetness filled my mouth. When I saw that mine was Cookie Oreo and my sister’s was Earl Grey, I wondered if mine had been loaded with sugar.

If this was going to be the case, should I have asked for an Americano? I thought about it, but I thought I couldn’t drink a bitter drink no matter how sweet it was, so I shook my head, half-awake, and threw the macaron I had bitten into my mouth.

“Sweet. Are cookie macaroons okay?”

“Oh, I like it because it’s delicious. Is Earl Gray delicious?”

“Yes, I like this.”

“… It’s too hot to go to a cafe. Honestly, I like the cafe because it’s cool.”

It was cool inside the cafe, but it was too much to go to the cafe, so I thought there was nothing I could do to create a cafe feel at home, so I put a straw in and mixed the syrup in the coffee.

“Ah, sister. Come to think of it, there’s nothing to do in the summer anyway, right?”

“Uh, yes… I’m a little free because I think I’ll go back to school next year. Should I take a certification test?”

“No, I didn’t mean to ask that.”

I took a sip of coffee, savoring the scent of caramel in my mouth, and snapped my fingers holding the cup.

“Then?”

“I was thinking about going for a summer getaway.”

I had something to say to my sister, and I just remembered it now.

It was a suggestion I brought up because I thought it would be great to go to the beach or play with my sister for a summer vacation. This way, since I’m out of the house, even if my parents come back for a while, I’ll be able to be with my sister without them worrying about me.

“Why vacation?”

“It’s hot, so I think it would be nice to go to the beach and have fun.”

“Hmm… ”

However, my sister seemed to be worried about the suggestion, narrowing her brows.

It meant it wasn’t a very attractive offer, but it was okay. It was just something I wanted to go to anyway.

“If you don’t like your sister, you should go with someone else.”

“Someone else?”

“Just friends?”

“… … .”

It wasn’t that I wouldn’t go if I didn’t like it.

It can’t be anything other than my sister. I couldn’t get my sister to agree with me by saying that, so I just said it this way.

At that time, I could have said, “Oh, it’s canceled,” but if I said it now, it would feel like it was really going.

From the beginning, my older sister had offered to be my girlfriend, but I didn’t think she would refuse just because I didn’t like it, so I pushed her little by little and listed out a list of things to do when I got there.

“I was thinking about just getting a tan, or going to the beach and playing, and just eating raw fish over there. If you don’t want to hang out at the beach, maybe just go to a hotel with a nice view and have a staycation.”

“… … Umm.”

“Do you not like that kind of thing?”

“No, I think it’s okay. Anyway, if it’s okay to be like this or that, there’s nothing to dislike.”

When I thought about whether my older sister, who was free and the only person she could talk to, would leave me and stay home alone, it wasn’t like that.

Because I am a sister who gets lonely easily, and before that, I was a sister who was trying to find somewhere to lean on.

I knew it well, and I just put it in between my words and steered it in the direction I wanted.

I caught my sister like I hoped.

“Then you are going, right? Do you make a reservation?”

“But isn’t vacation the peak season? The hotel seems expensive… Isn’t it a bit weird to take your dad’s card and swipe it at the hotel?”

“Oh, I have a lot of pocket money saved up, so I can use it to make hotel reservations and use my dad’s credit card to eat various things while walking around.”

“… If you don’t mind, that’s fine.”

In the end, my sister also nodded to the plan.

I knew there was sex, but that didn’t mean I didn’t like it anymore, so it seemed like I was just going to close my eyes and move on. Although it is not good to go to the sea in the summer and burn your body, it is nice to splash around at the beach or take a dip in the indoor swimming pool, so you may have thought that it would be beneficial to go.

I guess it was good. Since my sister gave permission, all I had to do was plan my trip from now on.

Of course, it was only after finishing all the urgent exams that I could relax and think, so all I could do was sigh.

My shoulders slumped and I sighed, using the included plastic fork to cut the cake. Then, as I felt the sweetness of chocolate and caramel, I saw my older sister eating a sweet tiramisu cake in front of me.

The kiss mark I left on the nape of my neck was clearly visible, but my sister didn’t seem to have any intention of covering it up, probably because she wasn’t leaving the house anyway.

Since I’m not wearing a bra and I’m wearing short-sleeved clothes that reveal my cleavage, it’s natural to feel embarrassed if people see me outside.

“Is it a test soon?”

“Ugh, it’s exam time so I had some time left… If you do well in your first year, it will be easier when you go back to school later, so just work hard.”

“Ah… right. Hansol is going to the military soon.”

“Well, I’ll go after getting a physical examination and then applying.”

“Early next year?”

“Yes. Early next year, late next year? autumn winter? I think it will come out around that time.”

My older sister groaned at the military story I brought up first.

When I thought about it, I ended up thinking that the military issue was too big of an obstacle for me. Then what if my sister meets someone else? What should I do if I find a good relationship and laugh haha?

It’s good for my sister to be happy, but I didn’t think I would like it if it meant smiling because of someone other than me.

So I just told him not to go back to school, but that doesn’t always work out the way people want.

It gets complicated.

Now that finals are over and summer vacation is over, I only have the second semester and the beginning of the year, so about 7 or 8 months.

Of course, I will stick to what I said at the beginning, just one year, but what have we achieved now? In the end, wasn’t it all that my sister nodded when I asked her to pretend to be my girlfriend?

But I had no idea what else I could do there.

They went from just siblings to lovers, but in the end, all they did was sex and expressions of affection. I felt like I couldn’t go any further than that.

If we hadn’t really been connected by blood, and if we had formed a relationship as lovers, we could have really strived for something beyond sex and expressions of affection.

It feels deep.

Although I knew right away that I was seriously crossing the line, I was reminded that incestuous marriage is prohibited by law, and that no more than this could be achieved.

Even Japan, which is open about sex, only allows cousins, so it was clear that it would be impossible for my older sister.

I groaned. Since I couldn’t go any further, I felt like I would be frustrated by the fact that I couldn’t go any further no matter how much I expressed my affection.

If my sister had only looked at me, saying that she would wait until my military service, I wouldn’t have had such a heavy heart.

“… It will be difficult if you go, right? Previously, I heard on the news that there were a lot of reports from the military.”

“Well, I guess so.”

“Would you like to visit me?”

“… It’s good to visit.”

But would you like to visit me in the meantime? When I saw my sister asking that question, I felt relieved.

It would be nice if I could write a letter, but to be honest, it would be too much, and if I received letters from my sister too often, my other classmates would look at me strangely, so I didn’t mention that.

“It’s summer. It’s really hot.”

“It’s really going to get hotter after summer, but is it already hot?”

“Ugh, Hansol, I can’t go out to places without air conditioning.”

“Then you won’t go to the beach?”

“No, I want to go to the sea. The water will be cool.”

Even though we had such a small conversation, there was still a pang in my heart. The worry remained and made me groan. Still, I didn’t stop thinking because I thought there might be a way somewhere.