episode_0068

Now that I think about it… if Mirae likes me… that’s between women… no, isn’t it?

I suddenly became confused.

I hadn’t paid much attention to it until now because I had been focusing on the relationship between mother and daughter, but when my mind cooled down a bit, a new problem arose.

Mother and daughter are weird, but… women and women are weird too.

But what am I?

“Um… .”

I was just sitting there with a towel on my head, when Mirae, who had just finished showering, stopped in front of the door.

“What are you thinking so seriously about?”

How should I explain it?

First of all, it is questionable whether you will believe it.

Of course, I personally feel that the boundaries of sexual identity have become much blurred, but the future may think differently.

“Future, what do you think it would have been like if Mom had been Dad?”

“I bet you liked it.”

It was the answer that came as soon as the question was asked, without even a second of hesitation.

“Eh… .”

It was also an unexpected answer.

I was worried that he would look at me strangely, but I never thought he would answer that he would like it even if it was my dad… .

“Why?”

Rather, it was only after hearing the astonished sound I made that Mirae expressed her doubts a beat later.

“No, no… .”

He shook his head and fell into deep thought again.

How can I convey this?

Mom said… Actually, it was a man!

No, that’s not it. At that time, I might really be admitted to a mental hospital.

But I still feel uneasy because I feel like I’m deceiving the future like this… .

“The future… .”

“Huh?”

“What if my mother was actually a man?”

Suddenly.

I came to my senses only after I let it all out.

“Ah, ah… .”

And as I was mumbling, trying to think of an excuse to add, Mirae approached me with a look on her face as if she had noticed something.

“I’m not a mom or dad, I’m a good person.”

“Eww… !”

Mirae, with a proud and arrogant smile on her face, grabs the towel on my head and starts messing around with it.

I was so surprised that I stepped back, and only stopped moving when I hit the bed.

“Rule!”

He shouted, covering his obviously red face with a towel.

“You didn’t even dry your hair?”

“You can dry your hair later!”

The look of arrogance on the future’s face is so annoying.

“Ppa, hurry up and fix it!”

So maybe I got excited without realizing it. I ended up biting my tongue in a disgusting way.

“It doesn’t matter, but… .”

He frowned as if the future would be painful.

“Then… First, I want to set out the things that the future should not do.”

Expressing with his whole body, ‘Am I okay?’, he jumped up and walked over to the desk.

Then he stopped.

“Um… Before that, I have something I want to ask… .”

Is it okay for me to ask this with my own mouth?

I feel a bit embarrassed….

But I’m still so curious that I can’t stand it.

No, you have to know it to set the rules.

“When did you start liking your mom?”

“Why are you suddenly being formal?”

“Don’t worry about the little things!”

It seemed like it wasn’t a direct question.

I made a mistake because I was nervous, and to cover it up, I acted confidently.

“Um… seven? No… I think I thought I was in love when I was nine… .”

“Sa, love… .”

But everything came crashing down with the word love.

A face that started to burn as if it was going to burst.

If ‘Okay.’ is somewhat mixed with LIKE, then ‘I love you.’ that Mirae said has 100% LOVE in that kind of meaning.

Besides, isn’t nine years old too early?

“Well, then… Everything you’ve done to your mom until now… .”

“I won’t deny it. Moms hate children who lie.”

Was it really necessary to stimulate the mother’s maternal love here?

It was clear that this was a tactic to lessen the punishment, but by the time I realized it, I was already impressed with my daughter for trying not to lie.

“A kiss too?”

“Yeah.”

“Even when we sleep while hugging each other…?”

“That’s right.”

“Even when we take a bath together… .”

“It was hard holding back.”

What, what are you holding back…!

I suppressed my urge to scream and continued asking questions without getting caught up in the pace of the future.

“Then why do you always hug me when you’re sleepy? ”

“Um… I just did it because it was convenient for my mom.”

After hearing the final answer, I felt a strange sense of relief.

It was because I was convinced that I still wanted a future as a daughter.

Even if it’s selfish, there’s nothing I can do about it.

Because I have lived my life relying a lot on my daughter up until now.

No, in fact, my daughter was my goal and reason in life.

That’s how much I’ve relied on my daughter.

“My daughter wasn’t completely gone.”

“If that’s what you think, then from now on I’ll act like a lover.”

From Mirae’s perspective, it seems she was dissatisfied with being thought of as a daughter.

But it would have been much better if you had been honest.

Of course, it’s a little scary because you don’t know where it’ll go, but isn’t it better than something like, “Don’t call me Mom.”

“I meant fortunately… .”

That’s what I said, but I know it clearly.

Now it’s time to get away from my daughter.

Is my daughter graduating?

While I was thinking that and swallowing a bitter smile, Mirae came up next to me and put her shoulder next to me.

“Good… .”

“What’s so good about it?”

“Now you don’t have to worry anymore.”

Every single word from the future stabbed my heart.

If I think of the future as my daughter, the future will continue to suffer as I just said.

You will suffer alone, hiding your feelings for me.

“Well… Mom didn’t want to be separated from Mirae either… .”

Lose both your daughter and your future, or graduate from your daughter and embrace your future.

“Oh, oh… Did I plan on living with my daughter my whole life?”

I don’t want to accept either of them.

But when I thought about losing my daughter and my future at the same time, my body reacted first and began to tremble slightly.

Even the future has already looked after Lee Haru, who is not a mother.

It doesn’t matter if it’s mom or dad, man or woman.

Because I told you that I liked the essence of this person named Iharu.

“Then that’s good.”

So, I too need to open my heart and face it seriously… .

“Because we’re going to be together for the rest of our lives.”

It was still awkward for me to hear the meaning of words I often heard changed.

“Rule number one. Don’t say anything weird to Mom!”

“Did you just hear something weird?”

◦The meaning contained within %◦ was incredibly strange.”

Oops.

I blurted it out without thinking and then looked into the future.

The fact that it was strange is just my personal opinion.

If I were to assume that the future wasn’t weird at all… I’d end up being weird.

“Did you get caught… . As expected, mom is mom.”

But the future nodded and coolly admitted it.

“Puhhhh… .”

It was such a surprisingly quick and honest admission, and Mirae herself must have found it funny because they both burst into laughter as soon as their eyes met.

I spun around in my chair, capturing that small smile in its entirety.

I thought that if I set rules while feeling happy now, I would definitely come up with better ideas.

“Then next….”

The reason I want to write down these rules is to help us keep pace with each other.

The future will be different from the speed and distance you wanted, but if you go too fast, I won’t be able to keep up.

If I keep getting dragged around like that, I’ll end up being unable to keep up, so I’ll have to run hard and spend my days miserable.

If you do that, the distance between you will naturally grow, and your relationship will become more distant as the distance grows.

I want to avoid that situation at all costs.

Some may think it’s an unnecessary process, but I don’t want to ruin our mother-daughter relationship too soon.

Because I love the future more than anyone else.

“I’ll start with my rules.”

As I was about to write the following, the future snatched the pen from my hand.

“Mom seems like she has a lot of things, but one is enough for me.”

Then he added a word of explanation and wrote on the margin of an A4 piece of paper.

“When I go out, don’t think of me as a mother and daughter. Instead, when I come home, I will thoroughly become a daughter.”

Rules written in neat handwriting.

It was really clean handwriting, without a single flaw.

“Is that… possible?”

There seemed to be some problems with the content.

“At least, wouldn’t that make you feel better? I also… didn’t necessarily hate being a daughter… .”

Did he just say something nice to make me hear it?

But the future looked so daunting and embarrassed that it just didn’t seem that way.

Besides, isn’t the future still a minor?

So, I guess he didn’t mean to do anything about the future right away. Surely he wasn’t trying to make his mother a criminal.

“Really…?”

“Really.”

How do I prove this… .

In fact, even without being proven, and even though it would be strange to prove it, I was now so hungry for my daughter’s love.

“Then come to mom and hug her. Like a daughter.”

“What does it mean to be held like a daughter… .”

“Mo, I don’t know anyway!”

He cut off the voice of the future decisively and spread both arms.

Then Mirae also bent down with a somewhat awkward expression, put her arms around my ribs, and hugged me.

Actually, it feels more like I was hugged than hugged, but I can’t help it since I’m smaller than Mirae.

Because no matter what position you take, it will always look like you are being held by a small person.

“Then there is no need to set any more rules… .”

Even though I was sitting on the chair like that, seemingly hanging on to the future, I kept my composure and continued the conversation.

“Yeah, you can do it like you usually do at home.”

As usual.

From now on, as usual, the future will be created through acting.

In the end, it’s just an extension of what we’ve been doing so far.

It will be a huge burden on the future.

“Still… Don’t overdo it.”

He patted Future’s back and whispered.

That would be the case, because the point at which the future compromised was really tilted towards me.

“Instead of worrying about myself, it would be better to worry about Mom first.”

…I wonder if it wasn’t always like that.

Mirae, who had been burying her face in the nape of my neck as usual, smiled meaningfully.

“… … .”

I kept my mouth shut with a little regret inside.

Well… I’m starting to get really worried.