episode_0057

Shoo-

Turbuck,

Turbuck,

Tirissia Brouard walked aimlessly along the road, her whole body soaked by the still-pouring rain.

It’s now fully into the night.

The sky is just pitch black. Just like my current state of mind.

For a moment, I was using a stealth spell, but since there was no one walking around the residential area at this late hour, it didn’t really mean anything.

“… ”

Tyrisia ran out with a blank expression, forgetting her shoes, and walked barefoot along the street, lost in thought.

Her hair was soaking wet and the clothes she had borrowed from Erto clung to her body.

Without any magical power to protect his body, his entire body gets buried in the heavy rain and he becomes cold.

But that wasn’t something worth noticing to her right now.

Her thoughts were constantly going back to the vivid truths the boy had poured out to her.

Now there was nothing hidden.

Erto, himself, knows all the facts clearly.

His conversation took place when everything he needed was fully prepared.

Just rationally, without any information imbalance, misunderstandings, or biased emotions.

Erto told us, without holding back, all the pain he had endured and all the emotions he had endured for himself.

So, the conclusion reached at that point could be said to be perfect.

The reason he betrayed him, the reason Erto decided to remain his friend, and the curse of charm.

The answer he gave himself after examining all the elements and laying them all out as a foundation.

He didn’t ask for much.

He spoke calmly and truthfully about the numerous mistakes he had made so far, without even using harsh words.

That we should break up.

Regardless of whose fault it was, we can’t go back to the way things were.

With this, we must end it completely.

I told myself that with resignation, not hostility.

“Why… I… ”

It was Erto’s consideration for himself until the end.

I could have hurled more harsh criticism and insults.

Erto simply gave us his honest opinion and the direction we should take.

Oh, what a blessing it is.

What a pity.

He who had committed a terrible crime ended up begging for his favor until the very end.

“Really… what a huge idiot… I am… ”

Why did he have hopes for him?

Why did you want to get his forgiveness without even giving a proper apology?

Even if I bury my head on the ground and cry and apologize, I still commit a sin that is not enough.

They threw him into the abyss, and as if that were not enough, they drove him to ruin.

Why on earth didn’t you give Erto a sincere apology from the beginning?

Even if it didn’t make sense.

It was obvious that there was no reason not to do it.

“Ahh… Ugh… ”

Tirisia realized the reason, clutching her chest with a distraught look on her face.

I was intoxicated by Erto’s kindness.

Because he never got angry at me or blamed me.

Even though I was in the arms of another man right in front of her, she didn’t even slap me once.

Because he declared to himself that he would continue to be her friend even after cheating on her.

Because seeing that behavior, I thought that he still had feelings and love for me.

“Ahhh… Aaaahhhh!”

Truly, it was an incredibly arrogant delusion.

Erto is not a god. He is not an emotionless stone.

He was clearly an ordinary person who would hurt when hit and bleed when wounded.

Why did he think that Erto would endure it indefinitely?

Why on earth did I think it was okay to hurt the person I truly loved?

You wouldn’t think that without being crazy.

Then it is clear that she is a crazy woman.

“Erto… Erto… !”

Tyrissia continued walking through the heavy rain, repeating his name.

The expression she had lost in shock gradually came back to life, and sadness and despair began to bloom on her face.

“Why did I… Why did I do this… !”

For a moment, I thought that I might be an innocent victim.

When I heard the story of the Curse of Attraction from Kelg Durakal,

I felt like he was controlling my body and mind and forcing me to do things I would never do.

However, fascination did not rule her everything, although it clouded her judgment.

Her vivid memories proved that she had not completely submitted to Kelg.

He himself was clearly feeling resistance and pain from the orders Kelg was giving him.

His temptation to betray Erto in an ugly way and push him off a cliff.

It was none other than his own weak will that prevented him from resisting the temptation.

“Ugh… Ugh!”

Tyrisia let out a groan of pain, constantly cursing her past self.

Now free from the spell and all interest in Kelg has disappeared, the feelings from the time when he was under the curse were still lingering.

It was etched into her mind like a scar.

Kelg’s face.

Kelg’s voice.

The person who loved and followed him like that.

I felt an overwhelming happiness in doing something for him.

The image of a foolish woman who was willing to carry out any destructive order and devoted herself to her loved ones.

And, what I shared with him―

“Woof!”

With a feeling of disgust rising in her stomach, Tyrissia leaned forward, clutching the wall.

“Wow!”

Chorrrp!

As the vomit poured down at her feet, Tyrissia coughed violently.

“Cough! Cough! Ugh, kekeke!”

But the nausea that was turning my stomach didn’t go away at all.

A terrible sense of guilt, welling up from deep within her stomach and crawling up her spine, continued to overflow into her throat.

“Uwueeek! Uwueeek!”

Tyrissia kept bowing her head down the wall and retching without anything coming out.

I wanted to deny everything I had done for that disgusting man.

It was because of fascination.

I couldn’t help it because I was forced to love him more than Erto.

I wanted to make excuses, to plead my innocence, to vent my frustrations.

But it is impossible.

‘There… my will was definitely included.’

Because it was he, and no one else, who was aware of the worst fact.

Because I felt strongly that my own judgment was also involved in deciding to abandon Erto.

Was his will completely controlled by Kelg?

To that question, Tyrisia could only shake her head.

I know full well that that’s not true.

Otherwise, why would he have felt so much pain when he betrayed Erto?

Because it was strangling the neck of the person you loved with your own hands.

Because it was something I did even though I knew everything.

Because I tore him apart, enduring my own resistance and sadness.

So, he can never be free from this responsibility.

As Kelg said, at least half of it was his fault.

“Colok! Colok! Haa… Haa… ”

The nausea that had been going on for a long time finally subsided, and Tirisia left the wall and walked down the road again.

Thump-

Thump-

Barefoot, unsteady steps wander slowly down the road.

Shoo-

Countless heavy raindrops fell, hitting her face as she looked up at the sky.

And finally,

“Ugh… Ugh… ”

A sob escaped her lips as the stream of water running down her face mixed with other liquids.

Tirissia groaned in heart-rending pain, tears streaming from her eyes.

“Whoa… Aaaah!”

What was most vicious about the Curse of Attraction was that it made it impossible to know how much of her true nature was true.

He clearly fell in love with Kelg and attacked Erto.

He became a terrible madman who did not hesitate to sacrifice even a relatively small love for a greater love.

Could that have been his true nature?

Or maybe it was because fascination gave me such an unconventional happiness that I lost my aversion to doing things I would never do in my entire life.

Was the false happiness he received from Kelg Durakal really the same happiness he received from the person he truly loved?

Or was it just a drug that numbed my mind, making it impossible for me to think clearly?

How much of that evil deed was committed purely by his own will?

I wonder if there is a part of me that made a judgment that was different from my true nature because my mind was covered in thick fog.

If that boundary exists, where is it?

How much of it was an act of love, and how much was it an evil act committed blindly, out of a sense of ecstasy?

I couldn’t figure it out.

That was the most horrible part of the curse called fascination.

The line of responsibility is so blurred that it is impossible to discern it.

Ending up as something ugly, neither a victim nor a perpetrator.

The mixing of one’s own will and the commands of others becomes unidentifiable.

And the damage is borne entirely by the person who was most precious to you.

“Ahhh… ! I’m sorry… ! Erto… !”

But what was even more terrifying to Tirisia, and what broke her heart more than anything else, was that Erto was no longer looking at her.

He had lost the person he had loved for a long time and who was more precious to him than anyone else.

He will never give his heart to her again.

I won’t love you.

His affectionate voice, his kind words, his refreshing smile, his warm hands,

All, all, all, all,

He threw himself into the boiling lava with his own hands.

It’s burned down and can never be recovered.

Even if the tragedy occurred because of someone else’s will,

The whole situation has already flown beyond the point of no return.

No matter how much you complain about the injustice, no matter how much you apologize with everything you have, you can’t change what happened as if it never happened.

Even the greatest genius wizard in Brewery cannot turn back time.

Erto’s relationship with himself was now in complete ruin.

The relationship as childhood friends that has continued for over a decade,

The love we shared for over a year,

Everything turned into meaningless bubbles and disappeared.

Now all that remains is for Erto to gradually fade from memory.

That fact was what tore Tyrissia’s heart apart more than anything else.

“AAAHH …

Tirisia cried endlessly and roared at the sky.

His last face was still lingering in my mind.

‘Hello, Tirissia. I truly loved you.’

A kind person who could not bring himself to say anything bad until the very end.

Eyes filled with disappointment and resignation toward the person she had loved for a long time.

That’s the sight that marks the end of the two.

Isn’t that such a miserable ending?

“Ugh, ugh, euaaah!”

Tyrisia eventually gave up walking and collapsed on the ground.

Despair. Despair. Only despair.

That was all the emotion that was coursing through her body.

“I’m sorry… ! I’m sorry… ! I’m sorry… ! I’m really sorry… !”

She covered her face with both hands, her shoulders shaking, and repeated her apology.

Words that would have no meaning even if told to me.

But it’s a word that has to be said over and over again.

“Erto… I’m so sorry…! It was my fault…! Ah…! Heuk, keueuk… Heuaaaah!”

So she sat down on the side of the road where no one was, and cried endlessly.

Passus-

The hiding spell was broken as my mind crumbled, but it was okay.

No one ever discovered her appearance,

Because her cries were lost in the pouring rain.

“I’m sorry, Erto… I’m sorry…! Aaaah! I’m so sorry―!”

So she cried out her apologies to the boy over and over again, covering her face.

Swish-

In the deep, dark darkness of the night when it is raining.

All that was allowed to Tirissia was regret.