episode_0056

“Dad?”

At the sudden change in Yuhee’s attitude, my brain stopped for a moment, and the accident came to a halt.

“Uh… yeah.”

“Where does it hurt?”

“Yuhee, do you remember what happened in Japan?”

We spent the whole night having sex, even engaging in outdoor sex. In that situation, it’s impossible to suddenly show this attitude unless there’s memory loss.

“We went to the temple… and Skytree… and watched fireworks yesterday, remember?”

“…And we went to a love hotel…”

“Why did we go there?”

“….!”

I don’t know if it’s acting or real. I remember what happened in Japan, but I seem to have forgotten everything related to sex. It’s impossible unless it’s acting. I want to believe it’s acting.

“Then what is this…?”

Yuhee showed me the maid outfit from the shopping bag she had pulled out. It had a nice smell, not the sweaty mess I had thought it would be.

“I was going to show you that later, why did you open it!”

“….”

“Really. I don’t know. I’ll go take a shower.”

The pouting expression that I used to find cute now felt different. It felt like everything that had happened was being denied.

I only remember wearing a yukata yesterday for the fireworks.

“….”

Something to jog Yuhee’s memory. Something I had picked up yesterday, wrapped in a plastic bag and thrown away in the trash can.

“It’s gone…?”

The trash can was completely empty. I’m sure I threw it away last night, but there was no trace of it.

“Dad, why are you rummaging through the trash?”

Yuhee, who had just washed her face, spotted me.

“It’s just that…”

“Today Dad is acting strange. We might miss the train.”

“….”

Yuhee casually dressed herself. She wore a white loose-fitting short-sleeved tee over a black tank top, and tight black leggings.

“Well then…”

It seemed like she was deliberately denying something.

“Kyaaa!!!”

“Even like this… you don’t remember?”

I pushed Yuhee, who had changed her clothes, causing her to fall. As I lifted her shirt, Yuhee’s large chest became more prominent. Maybe if I crossed this line, Yuhee’s memory wouldn’t come back, that’s what I thought.

“Ah, Dad… why are you doing this…”

“….!”

But Yuhee was trembling with a choked voice. She looked like she was about to be raped.

“Hu, huk….”

She regained her senses and backed away. Yuhee’s body was still trembling as if frozen.

“I’m sorry, Yuhee…”

Maybe my memories were distorted. Maybe everything that happened between Yuhee and me was just my imagination, and even the act of dating was just something I imagined due to the shock of embracing Yuhee naked at that time.

“….”

I opened my phone just in case, but there were no photos of us having sex, just ordinary photos of us dressed. So the act I was about to do to Yuhee was nothing but an attempted rape.

“Dad…”

Yuhee approached me, hugging me. Even though I was about to harm Yuhee, the kind-hearted Yuhee was trying to comfort me.

“I’m sorry…”

“No, Dad! I’m sorry for not paying attention to you…”

“No… I…”

“Right. Dad is family. Even if I was born unintentionally, even if I was left at an orphanage. You are my dad, and I am your daughter.”

“….Do you forgive me?”

“Yeah.”

There had been a wound that I had been inflicting on Yuhee for 20 years. The things she couldn’t forgive me for. Giving birth to her without planning, leaving her to grow up without parents.

And now, accepting Yuhee’s confession, we had come to this moment.

I felt warmth in my eyes, a feeling of joy, of gratitude.

“Huh!? Dad!? Don’t cry!”

“No… I just got some dust in my eye…”

“What’s that… Haha.”

Yuhee, who had been hugging me for a while, let go of me.

“Can you turn around?”

As I turned around, I heard Yuhee rustling as she took off her clothes. Probably trying to show me less provocative clothes. We’re family, after all.

“Okay, done.”

She was wearing a light white dress with a pink ribbon belt around her waist. With a straw hat on, she looked even fresher. She was the epitome of innocence.

“How do I look…?”

“Uh… beautiful.”

“Phew, thank goodness.”

Yuhee twirled around, fluttering her skirt. Seeing the white shorts peeking out, it seemed like she had no intention of seducing me.

“…Stop staring and go wash up quickly.”

“Oh, yeah…”

On the third day of our trip to Japan, we became a family.

~~~

Taking the Chuo Rapid Line from Kanda Station to Otsuki Station, then transferring to the Fuji Limited Express train, you can arrive at Kawaguchiko Station where you can see Mount Fuji.

“There are so many people.”

“Yeah…”

We moved early in the morning, so it coincided with rush hour. The hellish Tokyo subway, worse than I had imagined, unfolded before my eyes. I thought it would be fine since it was around 8:30, but I was wrong.

“Please move inside!!!”

Apart from the hellish subway, several station attendants were managing the lines. Just like cutting the line at an amusement park, a certain number of people were allowed to board before the attendants cut off the line with a rope and made them wait.

Even with the capacity exceeded, the attendants forcibly pushed the overcrowded subway from the outside, and eventually the subway doors closed. It felt like the inside would be a real hell.

“I hope we don’t get squished…”

After sending off a couple more trains, we were finally able to board.

“Yuhee, are you okay?”

“Yeah.”

Thankfully, we managed to get to the innermost part and I had Yuhee lean against the wall and hold onto it. It was harder than I thought with more people pushing.

We had to hold on until we reached a station where many people were expected to get off. Yuhee searched on her smartphone and said Shinjuku Station had many transfer lines. I knew Shinjuku was like Gangnam, so there would probably be a lot of people getting off. I hope we arrive quickly.

“Coming up next…”

After enduring a bit, the announcement for Shinjuku Station finally came. If people didn’t get off at this station, we would be in trouble.

“Whoa!”

“Ugh!”

Suddenly, the train made a sudden stop and the passengers were pushed towards us. I tried my best to hold on, but it was impossible to support this much weight alone.

“Thud!”

“Yuhee, are you okay!?”

“Ah… yeah, I’m fine.”

Thankfully, there was no incident of Yuhee’s head hitting the wall.

‘Wait, this is…’

Instead, as I clung to Yuhee, her chest touched my lower body. Whether Yuhee was aware of it or not, she had her head down so I couldn’t tell what expression she had.

“We apologize for the inconvenience caused by the overcrowding…”

After the announcement, the train started and stopped again, causing Yuhee’s chest to touch and then not touch me twice. Thanks to the soft touch, blood began to rush a little.

‘It’s dangerous…!’

“Please exit on the left side.”

Barely a little while longer, just as the moment when Yuhee would also feel it, the doors of the train that had barely managed to stop finally opened. As expected, many people got off, and the space became a bit more spacious. I moved over to give Yuhee a seat. It was still quite a distance to Otsuki Station.

‘I hope she didn’t notice….’

Fortunately, it seemed like Yuhee hadn’t noticed, as she was happily searching for her destination today. Somehow, a sense of relief washed over me, yet a corner of my heart felt lonely.

As we continued for another three stops, the person sitting next to Yuhee got off.

“Whew….”

“Is it hot, Dad?”

“Yeah… thanks.”

She took out a portable fan from her handbag and directed the breeze towards me. It wouldn’t have much effect if she did it outside, but now that the air conditioning breeze was starting to be felt, the cool wind was refreshing.

‘I shouldn’t be dozing off already….’

Feeling the cool breeze and the sun outside, drowsiness began to creep in. I had woken up early, and wrestling with people earlier had drained me of energy.

Yuhee must have noticed that I was starting to nod off, as she grabbed my head and leaned it against her shoulder.

“You can sleep.”

“No, it’s okay….”

“Then I’ll lean on you.”

“…Okay.”

As Yuhee leaned on my shoulder, a pleasant scent of shampoo wafted from her. Rather than feeling nervous, it was comforting and her warm body temperature accelerated my drowsiness.

“Dad, you can lean on me too.”

“Ah….”

Deciding that it was better to lean on Yuhee than to accidentally bump into the person next to me while nodding off, I leaned on her. I was worried it might be too heavy, but Yuhee didn’t seem to mind.

A relationship that feels more like love than lust. Our relationship was wrong from the start. No, unless there is evidence, everything up to now has been my delusion. That’s what I decided to think.

I received forgiveness today for a sin that I may never be forgiven for. That alone satisfies me. My task now is to properly fulfill the role of a father while watching our daughter grow up.

Thanks to Yuhee, I feel like I have grown a little more. She truly is my daughter. I’m proud. The best.

‘Yes. This is how it should be.’

I closed my eyes. Yuhee had also closed her eyes.

In reality, I secretly wished it was all just a dream.