episode_0045

The tension flowing. Hayun was blaming herself for this situation that arose due to her lack of self-control. However, the situation has already occurred, and it is Hayun’s responsibility to clean up what has been done.

However, Hayun’s body stiffened as soon as she heard the words ‘Whatever?’ that came out of Hansol’s voice. It wasn’t that I wasn’t prepared. Even if there were multiple masturbation videos, I knew that if I didn’t break away from the frame of masturbation, it would get boring, and eventually the content of the videos would have to change.

Whether the action changed, the location changed, or the genre had to change. No matter how ignorant I was of living my life, I knew that much.

Is it because I was so hungry? Was it because I was thirsty for action? As always, Hansol will covet her body. And they’ll just say they’ll film it. That was all I thought and said.

Even though Hansol never said he would do that.

Hayun swallowed her saliva. The reason Hayoon wanted to be hugged by Hansol right now wasn’t just because she was dominated by sexual desire. He was longing for the fact that Hansol needed him.

I wanted my already unstable position at school to be a little more stable at home. I wanted to convince myself that I didn’t even know myself anymore. I wanted him to tell me why he was like this and why he kept going astray.

He seemed like a person who was longing for the right answer. As if he was asking me to show him the right path.

But, I couldn’t do that. Hayun was becoming desperate at the thought that she could not belong anywhere and that the only remaining relationship between siblings could be on the verge of breaking.

It was Hansol who soothed his cold loneliness, and it was Hansol who understood him with a warm heart. The relationship had become more intimate as they mixed together, but after pushing him away a few times, Hansol realized the reality and looked around, and the result was that he ended his relationship. There wasn’t.

As Hayun’s thoughts deepened and time passed, Hansol’s expression suddenly turned cold. Then, I passed by Hayoon and turned to the living room. And at the same time, Hansol’s voice along with the sound of clicking his tongue touched Hayun’s heart.

“I didn’t expect it. We weren’t supposed to do that anyway.”

Why do those words sound so cold? The words he said, ‘We shouldn’t do that’ suddenly became a knife and cut into his heart.

When Hansol indifferently tried to enter his room, Hayun bit her lower lip and grabbed Hansol.

“Oh, no.”

The fact that he didn’t expect it meant that his importance in Hansol’s heart was decreasing. Now, he was putting his mind in order to end his relationship with himself.

So, like any other brother and sister, we just stayed in our separate rooms and didn’t say anything, and I didn’t want to be in that relationship.

It was only then that Hayun, who caught Hansol, realized. He said he wanted a harmonious family. And it was Hansol who made me feel it deeply.

They say that mixing bodies is also physical communication. I felt that Hansol was thinking about me through his touch and actions, and I remembered that his words and atmosphere were for me. When he realized that it was also a conversation with himself, he made a bitter expression.

And not long after, Hayun held on to the hem of Hansol’s clothes and opened her mouth.

“It’s okay. Anything.”

Hansol realized that his older sister was having a hard time and fell silent for a moment. Whose idea did it come from to come out to say hello without even wearing bottoms? Okay, Hansol, who was moaning, was thinking about how to react.

It wasn’t a very good decision to bite into something just because you liked it. If so, I didn’t know that the relationship might turn around again someday.

Hansol liked the relationship in which he took the lead now. It couldn’t have been better for his older sister, who had suddenly become lonely, to have her clinging to him since she had no one else to lean on.

Just because his older sister clings to him, he won’t turn his eyes to other men or go out and seduce other men.

Hansol sighed deeply upon hearing Hayun’s voice. Hayun’s shoulders trembled at the sound of sighing.

“Sister. What happened? What kind of sudden change of heart?”

Hansol controlled his expression and spoke words of encouragement to his sister. Then Hayun looked blankly into Hansol’s eyes. The first thought that came to mind was, ‘Why don’t we do it?’

When that thought occurred to me, I thought with great admiration that I was really thinking seriously about my relationship with myself and trying to sort it out, but on the contrary, I was depressed because I felt like I was facing the fact that I was trying to distance myself from myself.

Hansol smiled and tried to reveal Hayun’s true feelings, and Hayun, who had no way of knowing that, lightly revealed her true feelings.

“Well, that’s… I’m grateful to hear what you said, but I don’t know how to express it… ”

But it wasn’t his true intentions, it was at the level of making excuses.

How can Hayun say that she is afraid that her relationship with Hansol is becoming unstable and that she wants to confirm it by putting herself together? How can you say that all your relationships are falling apart and you need someone to lean on?

I couldn’t speak, so I spoke in vain. And when Hansol heard that, he carefully stretched out his hand and caressed Hayun’s cheek. After making eye contact a few times, Hansol cautiously opened his mouth.

“Tell me honestly. It’s not just simple gratitude.”

Hansol knew that fact and asked directly. I held on tightly so that I could face it head on and not escape. The reason Hansol caressed Hayun’s face was to prevent her from averting his gaze.

Hayun, who moaned ‘Huh?’ in response to that question, tried to avoid eye contact several times, but was unable to do so, and was eventually able to open her mouth after making eye contact with Hansol for several minutes.

“… … I felt like Hansol was trying to become more distant after that day, so I wanted to check… ”

Hayun’s shoulders slumped as she became more honest. Now that I had finally revealed my true feelings, I felt ashamed. Hayun, whose face was bright red, could not bear the sudden surge of heat and moaned.

Ugh. Hansol, who was looking at Hayoon and looking at the atmosphere, laughed. When he realized that his distance had actually caused a change in his older sister, with whom he had maintained a relationship, he was secretly defeated. I thought and hugged him tightly.

Hayun, who was suddenly hugged, opened her eyes wide, but soon after she calmed down, she closed her eyes.

Was the cozy embrace this warm? Feeling that way, Hayun slowly raised the corners of her mouth.

“I see. What was your sister thinking?”

“… … He doesn’t talk to me much, doesn’t look at me often, eats separately from me, and I’m wondering if he hates me anymore… ”

Hansol, who was hugging Hayoon tightly, asked Hayun, and Hayun, who had already let out her feelings once, began to let out other feelings as well. Hansol listened intently to the words.

And Hansol, who was able to roughly understand why she reacted this way, carefully took Hayoon out of his arms and looked into her eyes again.

Hayun, who was exposed both externally and mentally, looked at Hansol with a blush on her face.

After a while, Hansol spoke to Hayun.

“No. I don’t hate it. however… This situation is what my sister wanted. Shouldn’t you like it?”

Although his voice was warm, his words were like cold daggers. And it seemed like it was trying to tear Hayoon’s heart apart.

What Hansol did was not to attack Hayun, nor did he willingly agree to film the video. I just kept my distance.

Hayun heard those words and chewed her lip in a daze.

It was something I had to like. Because now I no longer have to enter into a relationship that might result in social disdain. Because now I don’t have to enter into a relationship that others might point fingers at.

But I couldn’t like it. The corners of Hayun’s mouth did not rise at all.

A voice close to a moan came out of Hayun’s trembling neck. Clearly, it was he who pushed Hansol out first. However, I didn’t expect it to be like this.

What happens if you are socially despised? What if others point fingers? Hayun thought that she could endure that level of attention even though I was no longer there, but now it just felt so miserable that there was no longer a relationship to endure and maintain.

Still, I couldn’t say that. Because I couldn’t cause further inconvenience to Hansol, who was just starting to find his own life.

“… … Yes.”

However, Hayun, who could not reveal her true feelings further, stood still and answered.

“I thought wrong.”

Hayun lowered her head and said that it was ultimately her fault. And Hansol looked at Hayoon, nodded his head gently, and tapped Hayoon on the shoulder.

“It could be so.”

Hayun made a mistake, and what she tried to seduce ended up being Hayun’s fault. After saying that, Hansol went back to his room, and Hayun was left there alone.

**

A day passed without anything happening. The problem was that nothing happened. Hayoon woke up in the morning blankly lying on her bed. However, she just bit her nails without any intention of getting up.

Now that Hansol had the right thoughts, he felt strange as if he was being punished for what he had done. When he pushed her away like this, Hansol cleverly clung to him and continued the act, but when he was in that situation, he bit his nails because he thought he couldn’t do it like Hansol did.

I could hear Hansol touching various things beyond the door, but I couldn’t face him because of what happened yesterday. I was wondering what on earth to do on Saturday morning, but I couldn’t get out.

Hayun, who had been suffering, let out a deep sigh on the spot.

“Ugh.”

Hayun moaned and gripped the blanket tightly with her hands.

Now I have no idea how to protect my position. I even felt like it was all my fault. Wasn’t it like that yesterday too? Still, I felt glad that Hansol moved on without saying anything.

Hayun was no longer able to guess whether what she was doing was right or wrong, and perhaps because of that, she moaned and suffered.

It felt like everything he chose was ruined, and whatever he did seemed to go down a strange path. However, if there was someone by my side to correct it, that wasn’t the case.

This week was just a test, so nothing happened, but I knew that things would be very different next week. It was clear that people would now call him a strange person, and it was clear that the gaze directed at him would be strange.

That fact was painful, and now the only person I could cling to at home was Hansol.

“Ha.”

Hayun sighed. I moaned. While I was upset, I heard a knock on the door. smart. Hayun, surprised by the simple and refreshing sound, opened her eyes wide and looked at the door.

As I stayed still, as if it wasn’t something I heard wrong, it sounded again, knock, knock. And there was a knock on the door.

“Sister.”

And Hansol’s voice was heard from beyond the door.

“Are you awake?”

“… … Yes.”

Hayun answered Hansol’s question. Was it foolishness? Hayoon herself was answering Hansol’s words without realizing it.

Because it was Hayun who unconsciously relied on Hansol and used her as support, Hayun moved her small mouth and spoke to Hansol.

“You can come in.”

Even though Hansol didn’t ask, Hayun took the initiative and told Hansol, and Hansol fell silent for a moment, then took a deep breath and turned the doorknob.

Hayun, who got up from the bed and sat against the wall, opened the door and made eye contact with Hansol. After waiting for a while, it was Hansol who spoke first.

“Sister.”

Hayun, who was nervous at the softly spoken call, swallowed her saliva and looked into Hansol’s eyes. Hayun, who couldn’t help but feel nervous because of yesterday’s incident, seemed anxious and grabbed the blanket she had been covering with both hands and squeezed it tightly.

Hansol cautiously opened his mouth with Hayun in front of him. I don’t know if it came as quite a shock to my sister when I nailed her for her mistake yesterday, but seeing her look so gaunt made me feel sorry for her.

“Is it very difficult? I did something I didn’t do yesterday.”

Hayun heard those words and bit her lip tightly. If you suddenly appear with that attitude, you are bound to appear weak. Even though she was thinking this, she actually wanted to lean on those words, so in the end, Hayun nodded.

“… … Yes.”

As the weak answer came out, Hansol smiled bitterly and approached cautiously. Hansol, who settled down on his sister’s bed, glanced at Hayun, then tilted his upper body and held out his hand. And then he touched Hayun’s hand that was holding the blanket.

As if by magic, Hayun’s hand, which had been holding the blanket tightly, lost strength, and the hand was slowly led to Hansol’s hand. Hansol held Hayun’s hand tightly and spoke softly to her.

“If you don’t do that, you won’t have a falling out with your sister.”

When Hansol carefully said those words to Hayun, Hayun looked at Hansol intently, trying to control her emotions that had grown uncontrollably. Hayun thought she had held back well, but her eyes had become more sparkly in the light.

After a short pause, Hansol continued speaking.

“I’ll try my best, but you know it’s hard.”

Hansol told his sister that she didn’t have to do that, as if he was admonishing her. After scoring points like this, the only thing to do was to give Hayun some room.

“If my sister acts like that, it’s hard for me to bear it.”

However, he blamed it on Hayoon, not on himself. Hayoon felt guilty at those words. I felt sorry that I had placed an obstacle in Hansol’s mindset.

Meanwhile, Hansol cautiously tilted his upper body further, as if he would not let Hayun have such thoughts.

“… … Is it okay?”

What came out of Hayun’s words was a question. It was Hayoon’s voice crying, saying that she wanted to accept Hansol’s increasingly unbearable approach.

Because Hayun wanted to hold on to someone who would acknowledge her, think of a solution if something went wrong, and understand her, she asked again if it was okay for her to be like this.

To that question, Hansol smiled and answered.

“It’s okay.”

okay. Because you were never wrong. Hayun thought so, but she never said it out loud. Because her mouth was already covered with other lips.

The two overlapping lips were suddenly lusting after each other, and Hayun burst into tears that she had barely been holding back, enjoying the distance between Hansol and Zero.