episode_0022

‘Why is this guy so strong···?!’

It’s incredible strength that I can’t believe belongs to a 7-year-old child. The blade I’m holding tightly is digging into my palm.

Grabbing the blade with my bare hands was a very reckless act. But at that time, I had no choice. I was watching from afar, and suddenly she put a knife to her throat. I was startled and ran over, but I only had one choice. Grabbing the blade with my bare hands.

That’s how I managed to stop the blade just before it went into her neck. If I had hesitated even for a second, she would have died.

“Let go, let go!!”

She screams. She pushes the knife harder to kill me. The blade slips out of my hand. In the end, I have no choice but to tighten my grip to stop it.

“Ugh···!!!”

As I clench my hand, the blade digs into my flesh once more. A searing pain surges. The blade catches on my finger joints and blood gushes out.

If I were an ordinary person, I would have given up here, but since I was trained to endure all kinds of pain, I was able to maintain my strength even in this extreme pain.

But even that was becoming too much for me. I couldn’t feel any strength in my fingers. I think I injured my tendon.

“Lord, the hand of the master····”

She began to tremble when she saw my tattered hands.

Her strength weakened. I didn’t miss the opportunity, grabbed the sword and pulled it back.

A longsword that rolls on the floor with a clanking sound.

I was the winner of the long tug-of-war.

But that fact didn’t make me particularly happy. It just hurt a lot. It was literally a victory full of wounds.

I looked at my fingers, barely connected to my hand, dangling. Blood was gushing out violently, perhaps as a result of the force I had exerted and then released.

Being tempered by pain doesn’t mean you don’t feel pain or feel it less. It just means you’ve become able to endure and endure extreme pain.

My tattered hands were causing me terrible pain.

As I was shaking as if I was having a seizure due to the pain that was coming on, she looked shocked and urgently treated my hand.

A green light enveloped my hand.

As the healing magic touched me, I felt much more comfortable. My wounds began to heal.

She asked me, sobbing.

“Why··· Why did you do that··· Master··· Your hand is like this···”

She held my hand and cried. Warm drops of water dripped down her palm.

Why did you do that? That was what I wanted to ask.

I shouted.

“What the hell are you doing! If you’re going to die, die somewhere they can’t see you?!”

I was annoyed. I told him to die from afar, clearly out of sight, and yet he tried to commit suicide as soon as I got there. Are you rebelling? Or is he just not getting what I’m saying?

It didn’t matter to me whether she died or not, but it felt dirty that she died as soon as I left. Doesn’t it feel like I killed her?

She didn’t answer at all.

“······.”

He just held my hand tightly and carefully checked to make sure I wasn’t hurt anywhere else.

After checking everything, she let go of my hand weakly.

There was no will to live in her eyes.

Empty eyes without a glare. No matter how I looked at them, they were eyes full of thoughts of death. I knew that if I left, they would immediately attempt suicide.

I thought.

Now he’s threatening me with his own life? It’s disgusting that he thinks his life is worth anything to me.

But what really annoys me is that… it wasn’t all that wrong. Her threats worked on me.

It became difficult to leave the seat.

After seeing with my own eyes that I would really die if I left, I couldn’t leave anymore. She really was going to die. She showed me that.

shit···

Feeling frustrated, I started to persuade her.

“Let’s stop now… Let’s each live our own lives, okay? You and I are both still young. We have more days left to live than days lived, so what’s the problem?”

“······.”

“It was just a mistake··· I’ll forget··· I’ll forget everything you did, so just go and live.”

“······.”

But no matter how much I tried to persuade her, she remained silent. Her eyes were still lifeless and filled with thoughts of death.

I screamed, “Pfft!”

“What the heck!! Please live your life!! Why!!! Why are you tormenting me?!!”

I shouted and took a deep breath. I was a little tired. Today was the hardest day of my return so far. I ran and ran, and even held the blade with my bare hands. The mental fatigue was not insignificant. I was tired.

Why on earth does this child disobey me? She has never done what I said. She says she is a loyal slave and all, but in the end, she does whatever she wants. She killed me and tortured me as she pleased, and now she is trying to take her own life as she pleased. She is not just a slave in name, but if she is a slave, shouldn’t she be able to follow my orders? I couldn’t understand her at all.

She stared blankly at me for a while before opening her mouth.

“My life···”

After a moment’s pause, she spoke in a very gloomy voice.

“My life ended that day··· The day I first killed my master···”

“······.”

“I’ve been surviving all this time, shamelessly··· But now I’m tired··· I want to rest··· Even if I live, I’ll only be a harm to you, Master··· Someday, I won’t be able to bear it anymore and will shamelessly go looking for you, Master··· Maybe then I won’t be this gentle···”

She bowed her head and apologized.

“I’m sorry for disturbing your heart until the end···”

“······.”

“I will die quietly, out of sight···”

She still wants to die. She doesn’t seem willing to compromise.

What the fuck···

I ended up telling her that.

“Let’s go together.”

She looked at me in surprise. I spoke to her again in a very tired tone.

“Let’s go together.”

Her expression brightened for a moment, then immediately distorted, like a child whose candy had been snatched from her mouth.

“Don’t lie···”

She shed tears.

“Don’t···lie···”

He mutters with tears in his eyes.

I guess you don’t believe me. I guess that makes sense. I didn’t believe my decision either.

“Haa···”

I sighed.

She buried her face in her knees and spoke in a low, sobbing voice.

“There’s no way the master would accept a bitch like me···”

“You’re kidding me···”

“······.”

As I stood there without saying anything, she started to get angry.

“Why···! Why do you keep shaking my heart···!! You said you’d just die!! I’m just going to die···!! Why do you keep giving me hope!!! Why!! Why do you make me miserable···?!! Why···!! Why on earth······”

Although it started out in an angry tone, it changed to a gloomy and tearful tone at the end.

I sighed and told her straight…

Calling her name···.

“Let’s go, Alice.”

At that moment, she looked shocked and raised her head.

He looks at me with a very surprised expression.

I looked at her too. With serious eyes.

Only then did she sense that what I said was true. She jumped up and ran to me.

“Master!!!!!!”

She hugged me. She was crying and saying something, but I couldn’t understand what she was saying.

I just don’t know anything.

Her words, my feelings······

***

Since that day.

Alice and I, like in previous episodes, wandered around the empire.

Our relationship is too complicated to explain in words. It’s a mysterious relationship that is neither here nor there. What I can say for sure is that although we are together, it’s not like we went back to the beginning.

How can we go back to the way things were back then? Such terrible things happened…

It was just a different, separate relationship from back then.

A completely new relationship.

In that relationship, I was still afraid of her. No matter how much I decided to accept her, it seems that trauma is not easily erased. Sometimes I have nightmares. Sometimes I get startled by her appearance.

The funny thing is, she was also afraid of me. To be exact, she was terribly afraid of being abandoned by me.

Even though I clearly declared that I would not abandon her, she did not seem to believe my declaration. It seemed as if she had decided that she would not be forgiven.

Well, it wasn’t like I forgave her as much as she thought. I just lived with it. If I abandoned her, she might do something outrageous again…

Anyway, she treated me with a new attitude, different from when we first met and different from how she acted in previous episodes.

His attitude was quite frank. He didn’t hide his fears or guilt at all, and his obsession and affection for me were revealed in detail.

There were many good things about being honest with each other. It was especially comfortable that I didn’t have to act. I remember how hard it was to pretend like nothing happened in the previous episode.

Time passed.

Alice turned sixteen.

Now that she’s 16 and hasn’t been abandoned, she must be starting to gain confidence. She starts to smile at me.

We played around comfortably like before, hugged each other, and stuff.

It was a bit absurd, but since we were going to be together for the rest of our lives anyway, I just let it be.

I’m too old to stand up for myself now, mentally speaking.

And time passed again, and Alice turned twenty.

She had grown into a fully grown adult, a figure that triggered my deepest trauma.

I thought I had adapted, but I was still afraid of her, especially when I saw her like that.

I didn’t hide my fear, and she accepted it.

However, she seems to have come up with a somewhat odd solution.

◦What if we do %◦■■?”

It was a strange and bizarre sound.