episode_0021

What is happiness?

What is joy?

Such questions were always in Luna’s mind.

Luna read countless books to get the answer to that question.

Everything from common romance novels to thick dictionaries.

So now I know.

Happiness, joy, love, joy, etc.

Although they were slightly different, they were all positive emotions that humans feel.

However, I didn’t understand.

Because it was a feeling I had never experienced before.

It was something I couldn’t accept with my heart.

Knowing and understanding.

That very small gap seemed so big.

‘I don’t know.’

That was why.

Albert David.

I didn’t know why he smiled like that whenever he saw me.

I didn’t know what the emotion was underlying that smile.

My brain was just receiving the information that I was smiling.

“How have you been?”

Albert, who had previously exchanged greetings with Duke Iris and Rachel, approached Luna and said hello.

I was hiding the corners of my mouth that were about to rise and acting as calm as possible.

It is true that I long for it deeply in my heart, but showing it on the outside is another matter.

Nod-.

Luna accepted the greeting as politely as possible.

Because he is her fiancé.

Because he is the heir to the Duke of David.

More than anything.

Because it’s the right thing to do.

It was not a heartfelt action.

In the first place, no emotions could arise from a broken heart, so it just acted according to what was right and wrong.

“… .”

“… .”

The two were staring at each other blankly.

A gaze filled with love and a gaze filled with doubt intersect.

‘Interesting.’

Luna’s feelings for Albert were simple curiosity.

I was curious and amazed, like when a child receives a new stimulus.

Why do you smile brightly from afar but hide your smile when you get closer?

Why is he more nervous in front of himself than the head of the family?

I wanted to know what emotions were contained in each of his actions.

A reference book for understanding emotions.

It would be just like that.

The two exchanged glances at the entrance and soon entered the mansion.

Unlike the previous visit to the dukedom, this time Luna took the lead and led Albert.

In fact, this was more familiar to Albert.

In her past life, she led her vassals on her behalf and skillfully performed the duties of the head of the family.

And those memories remained vivid in Albert’s mind.

‘but yet… .’

It’s nice to look as delicate as a flower in a greenhouse, but I thought this skillful and courageous look suits you even better.

Eventually, the place they arrived at was, of course, Luna’s room.

Although Albert had been here before, it was inevitable that he would feel nervous.

Since it was the room of the woman he loved, it had to be that way.

But I didn’t refuse this time either.

Regardless of the tension, it was a welcome event.

As I walked in, smelling the faint scent of flowers, I saw evening primroses placed by the window.

Perhaps it was because Luna took good care of it, but it felt much fresher than the last time I saw it.

In the meantime, it seems like some more flowers have bloomed.

“Dal, you are taking good care of me.”

I was happy that people cherished the gift I gave them.

Contrary to my plan to hide my likes as much as possible, those emotions were expressed in my voice.

I looked around to see if anything, but Luna seemed to be fine.

‘Should I call this fortunate?’

On the contrary, I felt a little upset.

Luna nodded lightly at Albert’s words and walked to the window to look at the flowers.

‘Moon is.’

Whenever I was in my room, I would always look at it like this.

Because it felt really good to feel at ease.

There is no need to read emotions from facial expressions.

There is no inconvenience in not being able to speak.

That’s why I came to like gardens.

Because it was the only place where I could feel comfortable.

Sigh-.

Luna carefully stroked the closed flower bud and sat down on the chair.

When Albert came earlier, he had to sit on the bed because there was no proper chair.

That’s why we brought in a table and chairs for tea time.

“Oh, by the way, I have something to give you.”

Albert, who naturally took a seat across from Luna, took out a small wooden box from his arms and placed it on the table.

It was a luxurious box tied with a yellow ribbon like an evening primrose.

“You might be surprised. I was so surprised when I saw this too. Would you like to open it?”

Nod-.

Luna nodded and carefully untied the ribbon.

And then opened the lid of the box.

Inside the box was a luxurious pen.

I felt like something simple and not flashy would suit me perfectly.

‘Because I’m a person who shouldn’t be flashy.’

A person who drove a family into disaster could not be allowed to be extravagant.

This is dishonorable to both the deceased wife and the surviving family.

“Would you like to give it a try?”

Luna carefully held the pen.

On the outside, it didn’t look much different from the others, but strangely, it had a magicite embedded in it instead of the nib.

Perhaps they gave it to me just to use it for decoration?

It was when Luna was thinking like that.

“Pen direction like this… .”

Albert held Luna’s hand and moved the pen around.

My finger had to touch the magic gemstone, but I couldn’t touch it subtly.

To be honest, I was very embarrassed.

I was also worried about what would happen if I hated skinship.

However, I wanted to do it myself.

I wanted to hold hands again.

‘I said I had no evil intentions, but I’m embarrassed.’

I felt very pathetic at the thought that this was no different from satisfying my own self-interest with gifts.

Those thoughts quickly disappeared at the feeling of our hands touching each other.

Luna, who was blinking and looking at the two joined hands, raised her head and looked at Albert.

Soft and gentle.

Warm and kind.

If his expression were to be expressed in writing, those words would be included.

‘It’s like a plant…’ .’

weird

I was busy reading the underlying emotions when I looked at someone’s expression, but now I felt strangely comfortable.

As if you were facing a plant.

I wondered why I felt this way.

So, I stared at his face.

The feeling of fiddling with my hands was already out of the question.

Then, suddenly, when he smiled and raised his head, Luna unconsciously turned her head.

‘why… ?’

I didn’t know.

Why did he act like this?

There was something that could not be judged as right or wrong.

‘The mind moves the body… .’

If this behavior is due to the mind, what kind of mind is it?

Thinking like that, Luna slowly shifted her gaze.

And he tilted his head.

“That, that, ha… . Sorry.”

Albert let go of the hand he was holding and bowed his head to apologize.

Because Luna turned her head as if she was dissatisfied.

If she, who values courtesy, had reacted that way, it would have been an expression of denial.

‘This is the worst.’

It wasn’t long after we got engaged.

We even met only 3 times.

Since he suddenly grabbed my hand in that situation, I couldn’t help but hate it.

Why couldn’t I resist that greed?

Although he promised to make her happy, what he actually did was to satisfy his own self-interest.

I felt like my own actions were so pathetic.

‘Let’s accept it humbly.’

That’s what I thought, but my head felt as heavy as a thousand pounds.

To be honest, I was scared.

I was wondering if she had come to hate herself.

But it couldn’t be like this.

Didn’t you reflect and resolve to move forward?

If you are stuck in the past and cannot see the future, there will be no turning back.

Albert gathered his composure and slowly raised his head.

The table came into view first, followed by her thin arms and attractive collarbone.

Eventually, when he fully raised his head, Albert was relieved.

However, if my heart calmed down, it definitely did not.

In fact, it was running even faster.

Beautiful lines sparkling in blue.

They came together to draw the Milky Way in the air.

[Are you unwell by any chance?]

I’m sure I saw it once yesterday.

But why does it feel so different?

Albert was surprised that the same scene changed so much just by Luna’s presence.

“It’s okay. I was just thrilled.”

Correct and pretty handwriting, as if written on a letter.

It felt like she was worried about me, and I was moved to tears.

Even if it was a formal concern, it didn’t matter.

And the woman seen beyond was so beautiful that I could not bear to look away.

Eventually, Albert let out a faint sigh as he saw the letters embroidered in the air becoming blurry and disappearing.

But it was okay.

It will remain in my heart forever.

[What a relief.]

Albert thought.

I will definitely make Luna happy.