episode_0018

Morphine was discovered in the early 1800s.

Well, considering that morphine itself was a type of opiate, one could roughly assume that it emerged around that time without needing to delve into the historical background. Moreover, in works set against the backdrop of World War I, morphine often appeared as a common pain reliever for soldiers.

Derived from plants existing in nature, morphine, the most potent painkiller, not only had a powerful effect but also acted very quickly on the brain. That’s why it was widely administered to soldiers until World War II.

Furthermore, it became a cause of suffering for soldiers who survived World War I and World War II. It was, after all, a type of the famous ‘opium’ from the start.

With its strong addictive nature, morphine was used as a last resort narcotic painkiller even in modern times when other pain relievers were ineffective.

Back in the past when the effects of the drug were only considered and the side effects were relatively less researched, that’s when it was used. And there wasn’t really any alternative medication available.

And I had stashed away morphine in my room.

“What is this?”

“…”

That’s right. Just because it was in the past doesn’t mean the harmful effects of opium were unknown. In fact, wasn’t there a famous war called the Opium War, where the Qing Dynasty, thinking that the country was falling apart due to opium, vigorously opposed and fought against the British who were selling opium to them?

It’s not like the effects were unknown in this world.

I used it ‘knowingly’.

And now, I was revealing the location of the morphine I had stashed away in my room one by one.

Because of Alice, who was rummaging through every nook and cranny of my room, searching under the bed and in the wardrobe.

“Your Highness.”

“No way, right?”

Alice muttered as she looked at the morphine on the bed.

It wasn’t a large quantity. I didn’t really need a large amount in the first place. Just enough for one or two doses was sufficient. Maybe an extra small bottle with three doses just in case.

But it was enough to raise suspicion in Alice.

“Huh? It’s not like it’s addictive or anything, right?”

“Your Highness.”

I calmly called out to Alice, who seemed incredibly anxious.

“Have I ever shown symptoms of opium addiction after taking morphine?”

“…”

One of the most easily visible symptoms after taking morphine is the constriction of the pupils. I had seen it several times before, a few years ago at Baekjungryeong.

Moreover, if I were truly ‘addicted’ to morphine, there was no way I wouldn’t show withdrawal symptoms. When intoxicated with opium like morphine, one would lose their senses for a while and go crazy, and there were obvious withdrawal symptoms like vomiting, fever, and diarrhea.

But my body was perfectly fine. Despite being incredibly busy when needed, I never experienced any of those withdrawal symptoms. Strangely, I didn’t even catch a common cold.

“Then why do you have this?”

“It’s for emergencies.”

“There are magicians in the royal palace, right?”

That’s right.

This world is a place where magic exists. There are magicians who use magic using magic stones.

It seems that they can heal a body without leaving even a scar, or even successfully reattach a severed leg recently.

“It takes too long to heal the body with magic.”

“Then during that time…!”

“And the untreated body feels pain, and therefore becomes dull.”

No matter how well-trained a person is, it’s impossible to move exactly the same before and after an injury. So, it was important to deceive the brain to dull the pain and move quickly in case of emergency.

…Honestly, I felt a little unjust. Because I hadn’t actually used it yet.

I thought about experiencing the situation once and then turning back time if necessary.

Becoming dependent on drugs has both mental and physical reasons, but the biggest reason is the physical effects it has on the brain and nervous system. The harm it causes to the brain and nervous system is very serious. When addicted to drugs, seeking drugs is not just like looking for food because you’re bored. It’s like a desperate person searching for food. The brain is already tricked into thinking it’s hungry.

However, I can cancel out that addiction in the brain and nervous system.

So, if there is a possibility of getting seriously injured and facing an extremely dangerous situation, I should endure as much as possible, see the future, and then apply that idea again after challenging it anew. Of course, in the end, without drugs.

“….”

Alice bit her lip.

“Because of me?”

“….”

Hmm…

It’s not just because of Alice. To be precise, it was just a preparation for all situations that I had thought about and prepared for. Just in case there might be a need to assassinate the emperor.

The emperor’s personal strength is top-notch in this world. Even Lucas couldn’t win with a sword, probably stronger than anyone known as the “Sword Saint” in this world.

Still, as long as you’re human, there will be very tiny gaps.

But those gaps are so tiny that you might have to repeat thousands of times in split seconds to find and exploit them.

So, the morphines were items to add a bit of efficiency to that process.

Looking at me without saying anything, Alice reached out her hand towards me.

Alice… is actually far superior to me in terms of ‘talent’ alone. Simply put, she is the emperor’s daughter. Her physical abilities are top-notch, and she’s very smart. Honestly, if I didn’t turn back time, I would never be able to beat Alice in a one-on-one situation.

Moreover, studying is the same. Reading dozens, hundreds of books multiple times, listening to hundreds of hours of lectures from private tutors… I could just make it disappear and extract knowledge if I wanted to, so if I had just studied, I wouldn’t have even been able to get into the academy.

In the first place, I wouldn’t have even survived until now.

So, um.

If I suddenly grab her collar like this, I can’t escape. I can only be dragged to a point where my face is just about a fist away from Alice’s face.

… Should I turn back time?

I thought about it for a moment, then decided to postpone it. Let’s decide after seeing the situation.

Because Alice is also one of the characters I like.

I didn’t want to turn back time on the time we spent together.

“Hey.”

Oh no.

Alice seems really angry.

“From now on, I’ll ask you, so answer me properly.”

“….”

It was lucky that my expression didn’t crumble. It’s like shining a light on what I’ve been practicing diligently.

“What do you think of me? And what do you think of yourself?”

“Princess Alice is destined to become the emperor of the empire. I am here to assist in that role.”

“As ordered by your father?”

“….”

No, this was my own will.

If Alice wasn’t here, I would have run away immediately. I thought I would request help and hide somewhere near Claire… near the heroine or male characters, even if they were a bit taller than me. Except for the imperial court.

I don’t know what Alice thought of my silence, but she looked at me with a fiery gaze and said, “Then let me ask you this. If my father were to appoint you as the crown princess instead of me, what would you do?”

“Such a thing—”

“If you think Father won’t do such a thing, you’re greatly mistaken.”

…

Alice thought Alice was mistaken, but the current situation didn’t seem to warrant such words.

“—If that’s the case, I will do my best to ensure that the royal authority is transferred to the rightful position.”

“…Even if that’s Father’s command?”

“Yes. Because it’s the right thing to do.”

At least that was sincere.

I have no intention of becoming the emperor. In fact, judging by the progress of the story so far, it’s uncertain whether the emperor can continue the royal authority. Because… isn’t that right? The emperor was the leader of the evil empire.

In the end, the one who will emerge victorious will be the protagonist, with a heroine and other male companions by their side. And many other supporters as well.

Although it’s not the end yet, most players speculated that the final outcome might not be a democratic revolution.

Alice may not be able to continue the emperor’s position, but she could become a hero of the people. And that would be much better for Alice’s future. No matter how much of the reality is reflected, in the end, it’s just a game. Considering the developers, there probably won’t be a situation where the royal family is completely wiped out.

“Even if it means ruining your body?”

Alice’s eyes turned to the morphine bottle on the bed.

I nodded.

“Yes, that’s right.”

Of course, I have no intention of using it until the end, but if I answered straightforwardly, there would be no reason for me to collect morphine, so I gave that excuse.

“… ”

Alice stared at me for a while, then released the grip on my collar. I tried my best not to stagger. Perhaps the nearly ten years of effort paid off, as I could stand firm without swaying too much.

“I’ll take care of this.”

“… ”

Alice picked up the morphine bottle on the bed.

And looking at me, she said, “Don’t worry. I won’t use it. The ‘Princess of the Empire’ wouldn’t be addicted to morphine, right?”

And that phrase ‘Princess of the Empire’ was also directed at me.

“… ”

“And I will make sure that no one can get hold of such items within the palace. Only those who can determine that it’s absolutely necessary will be able to touch it, not someone like a princess. Got it?”

“… I understand.”

After I said that, Alice nodded firmly with a stern expression. Then she turned around and left my room.

“… ”

After about 30 seconds, I let out a long sigh.

I couldn’t afford to make a mistake, thinking I might be the emperor’s daughter. Being grabbed by the collar felt like I was being suffocated.

Fortunately, I managed to control my expression, so there was no need to turn back time.

A while ago, when I followed Alice, the emperor had already left his seat. Whether meeting the emperor in person would have resolved the situation or not, I didn’t even consider the possibility, which seemed to have touched Alice’s nerves.

As Alice returned to my room, she couldn’t resist and started rummaging through her bag. Even though it was my belongings, she didn’t throw them around, but at least she wanted to make it look like the way it was before packing.

I was dumbfounded watching her do that, and as she continued to unpack her bag, she discovered the morphine bottle, causing a commotion.

“… Hm.”

Honestly, even if Alice were to expose morphine, she could have easily obtained it if she wanted to. It’s a world where opium dens exist in every corner of the city without anyone batting an eye. Of course, it was illegal, but the empire had no particular interest in the difficult lives of the lower class.

Thanks to this, opium had become somewhat trendy even among the nobility. Of course, it was harder to catch the nobles than the commoners. Until a viscount was assassinated, they could freely engage in such activities.

…Still, putting morphine back in the palace might be a bit risky.

If Alice were caught next time, she might be suspected of being a real addict and forced to be hospitalized in a sanatorium. The mental hospitals of this era, well… aren’t they a bit barbaric? I didn’t want to end up in a place like that.

“Hmm…”

If not morphine…

Well, there were a few medications that came to mind. Drugs that could significantly increase the success rate of espionage, even if they weren’t painkillers.

For example, yes, there were items that had been recently released in this era, so their harmfulness and side effects had not been properly revealed yet.

When taken, these drugs could dramatically increase concentration, allowing tasks to be completed at twice the speed and with even greater accuracy than usual. It wasn’t some sort of magical potion. It was a narcotic that existed in our reality.

Methamphetamine.

In reality, this drug was confidently distributed as a common medication.

The product’s pharmaceutical name in reality was ‘Philopon.’

Since the company that produced it was a Japanese company, it was sometimes called ‘Hiropon’ following the Japanese pronunciation.

Of course, like a drug, it seriously damaged the human body. Didn’t it permanently damage dopamine receptors? And dopamine is used to create positive emotions in humans. In other words, once taken, one could never feel everyday happiness again without taking the drug.

I could fix it by turning back time, but…

“…Maybe I should just stop.”

While morphine could be used for ‘exploring possibilities,’ methamphetamine was strictly a ‘results-oriented’ drug. The results obtained from this drug could not be utilized.

Even if I succeeded in an assassination after taking the drug, I would have to live my life as a drug addict, unable to feel any pleasure other than drugs, or ultimately, I would have to go back in time and produce results without the drug.

There are no easy choices.

I took a deep breath once again.