episode_0013

The lamplight illuminated the street. People brazenly displayed their naked bodies, unconcerned with who might see them. This was shocking enough, but it wasn’t uncommon to see people coupling in the middle of the street. If it were simply men and women making love, it might have been possible to ignore, but some groups were openly engaging in orgies. Two men with one woman, one man with several women—it didn’t matter. The grotesque part was that they all wore masks, concealing their faces.

Men would grab any woman passing by, force their mouths open, intertwine their tongues, touch them freely, and insert their members. The unbelievable thing was that the women seemed to accept this behavior as natural, readily offering their bodies. After coupling, they would simply separate and move on to other people. It seemed they didn’t even consider who they were touching before engaging; it didn’t matter who their partner was. They coupled again and again. If you could call it a dance, it would be a frenzied dance of intertwined human bodies.

“Haak! Haa!”

The sounds, which Asher had considered to be the howls of beasts, were the moans of people lost in pleasure. Asher felt his own desires swell uncontrollably, his body trembling. His eyes involuntarily scanned the bodies of the women passing by, fixated on a woman swallowing something larger than his own. It was a spectacle of flesh. Their naked bodies, illuminated by the reddish lamplight, were dizzying.

“Hng!”

“Haak! Haak!”

The slapping sounds of their bodies colliding, mixed with moans, constantly reached his ears. Their glistening skin reflected the ghastly lamplight. A penis, like the head of a large snake, penetrated and throbbed in a dark opening, heedless of the semen flowing from it. They expelled and swallowed semen without the slightest hesitation, voraciously. The opening craved more, and the snake heads relentlessly burrowed within, striving to release their desires.

The smell was hot and stuffy, a dizzying, pungent odor that muddled the mind. Why hadn’t he noticed sooner? The street was thick with a haze that blurred his vision. Above, where the sky should have been, a wooden roof covered the alley, seemingly to prevent the smoke from escaping. Within this smoke-filled passage, they continued their frenzied dance.

“Aang!”

A slimy feeling washed over Asher’s eyes. The overflowing desire of those around him seemed contagious. But it was repulsive, disgusting. It felt like the stopper had been pulled from a full cesspool, the feeling overwhelming him. The most horrifying part was that he, too, felt arousal at their actions.

“Asher.”

Then, a warm voice enveloped him. Though he wanted to tear his gaze away, he couldn’t. Consumed by lust, and lost in the realization that he was no different from them, he was tormented. A young girl gently covered his eyes with her slender hands. A comforting darkness descended. His eyes, which had been tormented by the gaudy yet sinister lamplight, were now at ease.

“Let’s go home tonight.”

Asher nodded at Belka’s words. He didn’t want to stay there any longer. He followed the girl as she led him out of the dark alley. He walked blankly, still smelling the lingering smoke, past masked figures. He didn’t know where the girl was taking him, but after walking for some time, he suddenly felt a lightness in his chest. Looking around, they were no longer in the festival town.

The chirping of unidentified insects. The rustling of crops swaying in the breeze. It was a new experience to be awake this late at night; he was captivated. Unlike the pitch-black night he saw during his brief awakenings before, the night, bathed in silvery moonlight, was surprisingly bright. The clear, cool air washed away the dizziness caused by the smoke and the cloying scent of people.

“Are you alright now?”

The girl had somehow removed her mask and veil. In the moonlight, her hair resembled crimson poppies. Her hair was tied in two braids as usual, falling over her shoulders. Her simple dress fluttered like a butterfly’s wings in the wind. Belka looked at him with concern, like a calendula full of worry.

“Except for a slight dizziness.”

Snapping out of it, Asher averted his gaze, feeling ashamed. He had forgotten how the girl would react.

“Dizzy?”

“Oh?! Wait a minute!”

He belatedly remembered, but Belka was already close, placing her hand on his forehead. As she drew near, the sweet scent of camellia wafted over him, different from the dizzying smell of smoke from the village. Yes, the girl was always so worried. Her cold touch on his forehead dispelled the remnants of his dizziness. However, he was still troubled by the images of flesh, and the excitement that smoke had elicited in him still lingered.

He felt embarrassed, overwhelmed by the contradictory feelings when he looked at the pure gold in the girl’s eyes, causing him to look away. Belka cast curious glances at his reaction.

“What hurts now?”

“L-let’s go home!”

He felt he would be even more embarrassed if he continued to meet the girl’s innocent gaze, so he took her home. He arrived at his house, an old and creaky place; it was as desolate as the amount of affection he’d given it. At least, it was a place where he’d lived with his noona for a while and shared with Belka. Feeling some sense of comfort, he removed his shoes and socks and lay down; a certain relief coursed through him. But the moment he closed his eyes, the images of flesh flooded back. The frenzied dance of intertwined bodies violently attacked his mind.

“Ugh!”

He frowned in disgust and opened his eyes. He doubted they were human, and he knew the truth about the village, but after learning the true purpose of that festival, any remaining affection had drained away. Yet, he couldn’t bring himself to demean them as subhuman animals because he couldn’t forget his arousal; he couldn’t forget the disgusting feelings he’d experienced when he thought he was no different from them. That’s when self-doubt consumed Asher.

“Asher.”

Belka called his name. She always called his name as if it were special; even though Asher knew he wasn’t. He loved the way she called his name, and when he opened his eyes…

“Ah.”

Asher unconsciously uttered a foolish sound because the girl’s golden hair was right above him when he opened his eyes.

“You’re troubled, aren’t you?”

“I feel like I’m going to throw up.”

He couldn’t help but answer honestly because even if he tried to hide it, this small girl would know immediately.

“It’s okay if you’re not okay.”

“But, Belka.”

“It’s instinct, it’s natural. If you deny something natural, it’ll only make you suffer.”

Asher wanted to say something, but, as if she understood him, she calmly stroked his hair, reassuring him. He felt slightly comforted, but still disapproved of her words.

“That’s something you do with someone you love. But those people, they just…anyone.”

He got up, his stomach churning as the images of the people returned. He was facing the girl.

“Do you think that’s wrong?”

“I, I believe what Belka said.”

“…Thank you.”

The girl’s cheeks flushed slightly, but she maintained her impassive expression as she continued.

“But Asher, coming to definite conclusions is really dangerous. Just like someone’s words aren’t always right, my words can’t always be right either.”

Especially for you, making judgments creates preconceptions and leads to the vicious cycle of hatred and disgust. And it could take a long, long time to resolve that.

“So, Belka, it’s okay if I join those people?”

Asher, still pondering Belka’s words, couldn’t grasp her reasoning, and asked outright. He didn’t intend to, but hearing his bluntness, the girl hesitated; she fidgeted and looked at him.

“Ugh, don’t take it that way. It’s just a difference in how we live our lives. Distinguishing between yourself and others is important for you. So, um…don’t go.”

Visibly flustered, she stammered, approaching him and clutching his sleeve, clearly anxious that he might leave for the festival. Does Belka know that this is exactly why he teases her? She knew many things, but this, she didn’t. When he calmed her down, she realized she’d been teased, and she puffed out her cheeks.

“Asher, you’re always teasing me.”

“Belka’s words are too difficult.”

He grumbled, and the girl, who had been pouting, smiled faintly.

“If it’s difficult, you don’t have to think too deeply. Just remember what I said whenever something like this happens. I’ll be happy with just that.”

Asher sighed, staring at the ceiling. It was late, so he spread out his bedding, but sleep wouldn’t come.

“Can’t sleep?”

If there was a reason, it was because Belka was lying next to him, the moonlight illuminating her golden hair. Yesterday he’d been so exhausted from sleeping with the girl that he didn’t notice, but tonight, the soft feel of her skin through her clothes was disturbing and kept him awake.

“A little bit.”

However, he couldn’t blame Belka; she simply wanted to sleep next to him. The problem was those visions of flesh from the village, continually appearing whenever he closed his eyes. The desire kept calling for the girl, driving him mad. He wondered if she would fulfill his desires if he told her, but the thought felt repulsive. If he couldn’t control his urges and kept wanting her, he would be just like those people in the village, the same people whose actions made him sick. At least, he didn’t want to be like them.

But he was repeatedly consumed by thoughts of flesh, and couldn’t sleep. He lay there, wide awake until sunrise approaching. He felt a movement from her; she was trying to get out of the covers.

“Belka?”

He called her name; he wondered where she was going. She stopped; then, she did something unexpected that startled him. She embraced his head in both her arms, pulling him close to her chest.

“Will this help you sleep?”

“I, I don’t know.”

Instead of helping, the images of flesh seemed to increase. He felt the softness of her breast against his face, the sweet scent of camellias filling his nostrils, everything stimulating him even further. Trying to mask his swelling desire, he said:

“More than that, why did you think that would help you sleep?”

“Because you once said you could fall asleep when you’re close to me?”

He remembered saying something like that. It was true that he often fell asleep when resting his head on her lap or leaning on her shoulder, and often napped during the day like so. But that was then, and now he was struggling to contain his desire while smelling her scent. He desperately wanted to have her right now, but managed to restrain himself before closing his eyes.

“~♪”

He heard the girl humming. It was the first time he’d heard her sing, but maybe it was her gentle voice, but that song soothed his mind. As he remained still, he could hear the sound of her heart beating in her chest, a steady rhythm that was neither too fast nor too slow. Combined with her singing and her hand stroking his back–he didn’t realize when her hand had moved there. Leaning against her embrace, listening to her soothing touch, he was soon lost in darkness.

“Did you sleep well?”

He opened his eyes and saw the sunlight shimmering on her golden hair. Apparently, he had fallen asleep listening to her humming, like a child lulled by a lullaby. He felt embarrassed yet nonchalantly tried to get up.

“Uck?!”

A soft touch against his member, and Belka’s moan made him flinch. The girl looked equally surprised. Then he realized their position. Somehow during his sleep, he’d ended up hugging her. That might not have been a problem. The problem was that his member was fully erect. Asher thought he’d tried his best to restrain himself when…

“Asher! Are you home?!”

A voice from outside helped him stop at the last minute. As if in preparation, the girl had scrambled into the wardrobe to hide. Asher, confirming her absence, opened the door to find the familiar man outside and found himself instantly irritated.

“Why are you here again?”

It was Mac. Even though Asher glared at him with disdain, he only smirked back from the doorway, paying no mind.

“I had something to check on. Bring me a mask, will you?”

“Why a mask?”

He felt suspicion, but he couldn’t do anything. This man was the one who looked after him. Even though he didn’t like him, at least while he was still in the village, rebelling wouldn’t be a good choice. This he knew. He returned inside to fetch the mask, and as he handed it to Mac…

“Hoo.”

Mac smirked, his lips curving into a smile.

“What, what is it?”

“It’s nothing. Seems you enjoyed the festival thoroughly.”

Asher asked him why he was acting like this, but he just said it was nothing and left, reminding Asher to definitely participate in the festival again. Asher could only watch with a grim expression. He couldn’t shake the feeling he’d done something very wrong. Then night fell again.

“Do we really have to go again tonight?”

Belka held the mask, her expression full of anxiety.

“I, I really don’t want to go either.”

Mac’s words about adults needing to participate in the festival flashed through his mind. For some reason, Mac knew he was there. If he didn’t go, he would find out. He’d tried to look for an escape route earlier, but security was tighter than usual. So, with nothing else to do, he and the girl put on masks and went to the festival.

This time he avoided the area from yesterday. Still, he frowned at people openly having sex in the streets or in dark corners; he couldn’t understand how he had missed them yesterday. They were everywhere. As he walked aimlessly, disturbed by it all…

“Behold! A rare item has arrived! A zelkova tree, centuries old!”

A loud voice caught Asher’s attention; he turned around. There, a masked merchant was selling pieces of wood. As far as Asher knew, the only Zelkova tree in the forest was where Belka was found. But would they even use the tree for money like this? The village elder acted very confidently, boasting about how rare it was. The zelkova pieces being sold were so fragmented that anyone would fail to recognize the original tree.

“That’s the real one!”

Anger, forgotten until that moment, rose up, but Belka stopped him before he could approach the seller.

“Let’s go.”

Even seeing her shattered home, the girl said that calmly, her voice detached, as if that tree was never hers.

“That’s yours!”

“It wasn’t mine. I don’t have anything in this world.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Asher muttered in protest, and the girl merely patted his hand in comfort. When he turned away dejectedly, he was suddenly swept up in a wave of people, losing Belka’s hand.

“Belka?! Belka!”

Forgetful that there were so many people, he called her name loudly, pushing through the crowd. Because she was small, she disappeared into the throng. His heart pounded in his chest, his body slick with sweat. He wouldn’t lose her. His empty hand felt an unbearable anxiety. The longer it seemed she was lost, the closer to heart failure he felt.

“Got you!”

He spotted a small hand reaching out from the crowd; he quickly grasped it.

“Haah haah, thank goodness.”

After squeezing out of the crowd, they were in an alleyway. He’d tried to avoid such places, but the crowd’s density had pushed them in. After catching his breath, Asher glanced around and saw more people walking down the street. It seems he could escape alone, but Belka would only get swept away again.

“Shall we rest for a bit here?”

He suggested; the girl nodded silently, and Asher sat down on the ground.