episode_0010

It’s often said that when it comes to school violence, the bystanders are more detestable than the perpetrators. Speaking from experience, I’d say that statement is only half true. It’s true that the perpetrators are despicable, but what’s even more detestable is the perpetrators themselves.

However, there are people more detestable than bystanders.

Those are the instigators.

“Hey, loser. Why don’t you confess your feelings to her?”

In other words, that’s what Choi Inseong said.

He was the one who first started tormenting me, not Park Sihyun, who hung around with that guy.

To most people, he might seem like just another lackey hanging out with the popular kids. Maybe Park Sihyun even thought of him that way.

But this guy was more malicious than Park Sihyun.

“What’s wrong, not gonna do it? Don’t want to? Want me to take another creepy selfie?”

With a somewhat symmetrical face, this guy aspired to be a celebrity, and while he didn’t resort to physical violence, he had a twisted side.

What was peculiar was that he seemed more interested in guys’ backsides than girls. Once he caught wind of my interest, he goaded the popular kids into subjecting me to all sorts of perverted torment.

For instance, taking pictures by tearing open my pants, making me do embarrassing things in front of others, or repeatedly hitting my thighs with a stick.

Although I never did any of these things, this good-looking guy who was popular with the girls had the popular kids earnestly believing his words. But the funny thing was, he didn’t act that way in front of Park Sihyun.

I don’t know why. It seemed like there was something special about Park Sihyun; maybe he had a homosexual inclination, judging by his obsession with guys’ backsides. I was half-suspecting, but anyway.

Once, he told a girl from our class to confess her feelings to me.

She was pretty, but she was always at the top of the class, and although there were occasional admirers, she never dated anyone.

That guy, who was fixated on guys’ backsides, showed interest and asked her out. But he got turned down. Frankly, the rejection was expected. He was just a mediocre guy with a somewhat symmetrical face, so it was natural for a proper girl to reject him.

Seemingly harboring a grudge, he tried to indirectly torment me by trying to publicly humiliate me through a forced confession.

I couldn’t resist such coercion. At that time, I was physically and mentally immature, my self-esteem and confidence were already shattered.

“Hey… do you want to go out with me?”

So I did. It was a real confession like a true loser.

Naturally, the girl’s expression distorted upon receiving the confession.

In fact, no matter what I said there, it would have been humiliating for her. After all, I was already a public outcast, and she was subtly popular among the guys.

“Yeah, he must have forced you, right? You’re really stupid. Did you actually do it because he told you to?”

“… ”

Naturally, I got angry. I just bowed my head and endured it silently.

“Hahaha! That idiot is so funny!”

From one side, I could hear Park Si-hyun’s laughter. Choi In-sung was also snickering next to him. The other bullies, as well as those who pretended not to notice, no one was on my side.

It was one of my nightmare-like memories.

Fortunately, that’s in the past now.

“Why the long face? Oh right, you confessed to her, didn’t you? Tears are welling up. You were childhood friends, right? What will you do now that your childhood friend has been taken away?”

Now I was mocking Choi In-sung instead. And I was doing it while he was hugging Park Si-hyun, the one he had confessed to.

“You… you’ve grown a lot, huh?”

That alone was enough provocation; his face turned red.

It’s understandable. After confessing and being rejected, he quit the private institute, but he persistently kept in touch with Park Si-hyun.

I made sure they never met. Instead, I let them talk on the phone a few times.

I wanted to keep his hopes alive without neatly resolving things.

“Yeah, you’ve grown a lot. You’ve gotten taller too. They say men grow even in the military. He hasn’t gone to the military yet. But that’s not what I want to ask, is it?”

“What happened? Why are you dating Park Si-hyun?”

He asks as if interrogating me, but his eyes are on Park Si-hyun. She shows no intention of leaving my embrace, looking at me with a blank expression.

For him, this must be quite absurd.

Seeing Park Si-hyun, who tormented me so relentlessly, now clinging to me with a female-like expression.

That memory has probably been distorted, and for that guy who’s replaced those memories with romantic feelings, it must be as humiliating as being NTR’d.

“Well? Why not ask the person directly?”

“…Sihyun?”

Choi Inseong stared at Park Sihyun with a vacant expression. Park Sihyun looked troubled and hesitant.

“Say something. Why are you acting like this with him?”

“Inseong, that’s… Hmph!”

“…!”

Before Park Sihyun could answer, he used the hand that was embracing her to grope her chest.

Park Sihyun let out a very sensitive moan. And upon seeing this, Choi Inseong seemed to be struck by a second shock.

“Why are you making that face? Can’t stand seeing it?”

“Let go of me, you jerk.”

“Why? Can’t even touch your lover’s chest?”

“But he doesn’t like it!”

“Is that so? Hey, don’t you mind?”

I asked Park Sihyun.

Park Sihyun glanced at me with trembling eyes for a moment, then turned her head away.

“…No.”

“See? She likes it too.”

“…….”

“Lies… I liked him first…”

Oh my goodness. Are you serious about that?

It seems my earlier speculation about Park Sihyun was indeed true. It looks like this guy had an interest in Park Sihyun even when she was a man. Of course, he couldn’t say anything then. Park Sihyun was bisexual when she was a man, and this gay jerk, fixated on his own desires, would have just been rejected if he confessed.

Then, unable to hold back any longer, he confessed after Park Sihyun became a woman.

Some kind of… ultimate revenge for this filthy gay jerk.

“Hey. Really? You like him? That loser?”

“…Yes.”

“If you’re being threatened or something right now…”

“No… really. I’m dating him.”

“Lies…”

I asked Park Sihyun again, but her answer didn’t change. Still, he seemed to not believe her.

Well, I did keep them talking on the phone for a year, enough to make him feel anxious. From his perspective, it probably felt like some kind of follow-up after the confession.

At that time, Park Sihyun had no idea she was being played by me.

“I guess you still can’t believe it, Sihyun.”

“Hmm?”

“Let’s kiss.”

“Here, here…?”

“Yeah. If I show you us kissing, will you believe it?”

“Okay- mmm…”

We kissed right there, in the middle of the street, tongues entwined, amidst passing people.

Passersby all turned to look.

But more than any other gaze, the one in front of him burned the hottest.

“…I’m leaving.”

“Haha… uh, okay… Bye, Inseong.”

He was released around the time he couldn’t hold on and ran away.

With a long kiss, Park Sihyun, dazed as if out of his mind, bid farewell in a vacant voice.

“…Are you crazy? Why would you do that?”

It wasn’t until Choi Inseong ran off into the crowd that Park Sihyun questioned him persistently.

He lightly flicked me with his hand, but it didn’t hurt at all. It just felt like my real girlfriend was throwing a tantrum.

“Why do you think? Really?”

“…Sorry.”

“Why are you sorry?”

“Because I harassed that jerk with you?”

“Sorry…”

“Never mind. I feel relieved just now.”

Park Sihyun continued to look apologetic, but I didn’t hold any grudge against him. I had even told him to go back to being a man. On the other hand, it wasn’t the same for Choi Inseong.

Even that just now wasn’t planned at all. I had been eager to do that when we met someday. If Park Sihyun had gone back to being a man, I wouldn’t have done it. Even I wasn’t prepared to become gay for revenge.

“Anyway, it’s late. Let’s go to the academy.”

“Uh…”

“But why did that jerk come here? Didn’t he quit the private academy?”

Choi Inseong was a guy who boasted about becoming a celebrity with his half-and-half face.

But ultimately, he failed.

He had been a trainee idol since the first year, but he couldn’t debut until the third year.

His face was quite attractive, and he was popular among girls, but that was it.

Idol life might seem easy, but it’s not just about having a good-looking face. Talent, passion, effort, family background, connections—all are necessary, but he lacked everything except his face. Moreover, his personality was so filthy that it was obvious what his trainee life must have been like.

Ultimately, seeing him at the private academy probably meant something went wrong with his career path. Or…

“He’s probably attending an acting academy these days. It must be nearby.”

“Acting academy? Didn’t he say he was going to be an idol?”

“It’s tough to be an idol after 20. Even for male idols… That’s why he’s probably trying to transition to acting. He has to aim for that at least if he wants to make a living.”

Then, I coincidentally ran into him.

Well, maybe it wasn’t a coincidence after all.

If he still couldn’t let go of his feelings for Park Si-hyun even after confessing, then perhaps attending the acting academy near this private institute was intentional.

It might have been with the thought that he could coincidentally run into Park Si-hyun. That’s what I think, at least.

In reality, not long after being confessed to, Park Si-hyun almost never showed up at the private institute.

The reason? It’s because of me. I called him over to my house and chewed him out every day.

“Hey.”

“Yeah?”

“Don’t you regret accepting his confession?”

“…That’s in the past.”

“If we could go back to that time, would you accept it? Honestly, that guy is better looking than me.”

“Am I gay? Should I accept someone just because he’s good-looking?”

Dude, it’s kind of weird when you say that.

“…Even if we could go back, I wouldn’t have accepted it.”

“Why?”

For a moment, I wondered if it was because of me, but soon I smirked inwardly. There’s no way he would do that. Even now, pretending to be my lover is just a test for him.

“Do you remember what you said?”

“Hmm?”

“When you told him about the confession… You said something.”

“What? That he might be gay?”

“Yeah… At the time, I didn’t think so. But now, thinking back… it seems somewhat plausible.”

“Hmm….”

I wonder if he also noticed to some extent. When he was a guy, he probably didn’t know. He may have hidden it well, and perhaps couldn’t objectively see our friendship.

But after becoming a girl, after being confessed to, and watching us keep in touch, he probably caught on.

If a close same-sex friend found out that they were actually seen as romantic, it would likely be a huge shock. And honestly, it would be repulsive. Even if we went back to the past, or even in my current female state, I probably wouldn’t be able to accept the confession.

“So, you probably don’t want to date me either?”

“Huh? No, why?”

“Why? We’re both guys.”

“…I’m a girl now, and it’s uncomfortable for my personality… all the emotions he had for me were based on me being a guy. That’s what makes me uncomfortable.”

“I see.”

The memories might have changed, but perhaps the feelings for Park Sihyun were likely the same as they originally were. Park Sihyun probably finds it hard to accept those feelings.

“…But how about you?”

“Hmm?”

“Do you… like being with me?”

…Even if I say we’re dating, isn’t it just a trial contract relationship?

After all, a fake relationship. If done well, a sex partner. It’s like the relationship between an old concubine and her master.

Park Sihyun was asking with a serious expression.

It was difficult to give a casual answer to that.

“Hey, why are you asking something so obvious.”

“Hmm?”

I lightly stole a kiss.

Park Sihyun’s surprised pupils widened.

“Of course I do. Where can I find a woman like you?”

“……”

Pretty face, good body, and not a bad family background.

Just the OS inside is a bit off, but the body is perfect.

There’s no problem with dating and fooling around.

If this guy can’t become a man, then seriously living as a woman wouldn’t be so bad either. I’m convinced of that.

“…Really?”

“Yes.”

“Are you sure?”

“But…”

“Come with me.”

Huh?

Suddenly, Park Sihyun grabbed me and headed somewhere.

It was still the quiet male restroom at the private institute.

It was a place often used for fooling around when Park Sihyun was still attending the institute last year.

“Hey, what are you doing?”

Park Sihyun grabbed me and took me into one of the stalls in the restroom.

Once inside, she locked the door.

And then said,

“Let’s have sex. Right now.”

As if she couldn’t bear it.