episode_0005

“Aria.. I can’t even last a week without you..”

“Eshel, it’s been 10 years since we last saw each other, right?”

Aria pushes away Eshel, the Countess, who sticks to her with an incredulous smile. They must be really close.

“Hey. Kidney! Next time, it’s for real!”

“David, you talk a lot after losing. Kidney, see you next time.”

“Okay, is it our turn to visit next time?”

“Great! When you come, I’ll show you my favorite garden. Come when the apples are ripest. Our estate’s apples are amazing.”

Oh, the apple-like Lady Youngae’s love for apples seems heavier than expected,

“Kidney. Thank you for playing with our children. When we meet next time, treat me as a friend’s parent rather than a Countess.

“Yes, Your Excellency.”

“Well then, let’s depart. To the Proterin Estate! Hiyah!!”

Clatter clatter. The carriage fades into the distance with the sound of horse hooves. It’s not a forever farewell, but it feels strangely empty.

“Kidney, how was it?”

What could she mean? A complex question mixed with various meanings lingered in my mind before I quickly found an answer.

“It was fun.”

“So, the Empire, 200 years ago, winter. Lost in all battles except for some in the north…”

Why am I even taking this class? I should have wielded a sword at least once during this time…

“Sigh. My lord, you seem to be lost in thought. Are my classes not interesting to you?”

Oh dear, caught red-handed.

“Um. The weather is nice too. Shall we end here today?”

“My lord, it’s raining outside.”

“Ugh. Can’t help it, then.”

“Oh, my lord!”

The teacher briefly heads to the backyard and will probably continue practicing swordsmanship.

“My lord? Aren’t we still in class?”

“Anna, hello? I came out early today because they said they would finish the lesson quickly.”

“Something seems off…”

With a tilt of her head, Anna, with hair cascading down to her waist, suspiciously looks at me, “So what can you do?”

“We should get back to work. I have things to do too.”

“Okay..”

The horizontal cut. The vertical cut seems to have hit a snag.

Cutting downwards naturally follows gravity and can be easily imagined, but cutting horizontally…

Lost in thought, I walk and see a farmer harvesting wheat by the roadside. It’s already autumn, and thoughts of Selina’s estate come to mind. The neatly cut wheat stubble catches my eye.

“Hey, how did you cut this wheat so neatly?”

“Whoa, my lord! Hello!”

“Yeah. So, what’s the secret?”

“Haha. There’s no secret. You grab the wheat, take the sickle, and cut like this! That’s how you get a straight cut!”

“Pull… and cut…”

“Yes, that way it cuts straight.”

Pulling… from start to finish…

“Ah! I think I got it. Thanks!”

“Good luck, my lord!”

Yes, you grab the starting point and pull towards the endpoint to cut. Just slashing randomly makes the sword waver and rough.

“Imagination is like a black hole sucking everything in.”

Swish!

“Ha, ha..ha..”

As if the air momentarily split, leaving a trace, I soon lost consciousness.

***

“Ugh..”

Lifting heavy eyelids, I look around the blurry room and realize I’m in a bedroom.

It’s not my room, there are many unfamiliar books here?

“Kid, you’re awake.”

“Madam..”

“You must be exhausted. You’ve strained every muscle as if you’ve been running all day and collapsed. You rascal.”

Narrowing her eyes, she pokes my nose with her slender finger.

“When I heard you left in the middle of class, saying it was a lie to Anna.”

“Maybe I should apologize first because I’m angry.”

“I really don’t know? That’s not what made me mad.”

“Yes..”

“Ah, this part. I got upset because I didn’t take care of you properly. You may not know anything other than fighting. I mean, you’re the only one for me.”

“I’m sorry for disappointing you. I’ll try harder next time to avoid such incidents.”

“You… sigh… okay.”

Aria, looking displeased, tells me to rest deeply before leaving. Watching her shoulders and footsteps as she walks away, a deep sense of sadness wells up within me.

***

September 11

Kid collapsed after being so focused on training.

It was a few days ago when he said he wished he had taken care of himself.

The most frustrating thing is not that he didn’t listen or that he was disappointed.

Kid realized that he doesn’t love himself, but I can’t do anything about it.

————

I feel strange. It feels like the first time I’ve ever worried this much, including past lives.

The eyes watching me were filled with worried sadness. I look confused in their reflection.

“Sob… Kid… Do you know how surprised we were when you suddenly collapsed?”

“Anna. I got up just fine.”

“Kid. Madam was very worried too, watching over you every day without sleeping by your side. So was I.”

“Rebecca, you too… I’m not a patient anymore. It was just that day.”

“Kid, instead of saying that, why don’t you go see the lady again?”

“Hanson… Okay. Okay, I get it, everyone.”

Rather than scolding me, speaking with such sincere concern makes my stomach churn like I’ve swallowed dozens of feathers.

.

.

.

Knock, knock.

“Milord? May I come in?”

“What’s wrong, Kid?”

Aria closes the diary she was writing in and looks at me.

“I heard that you took care of me when I collapsed… and that you were very worried. Thank you.”

“Hoo… Kid. Why do you sometimes live as if life were a second chance? There’s nothing more important than you. If you don’t love yourself, what will you do?”

How can I love myself? I am nothing but a sinner.

How can I live happily alone? It still lingers in my mind.

“Kid, do you love me?”

‘Universe, do you love me?’

Memories suddenly overlap. Is it regret for not saying “I love you” even once back then?

“I love you. Enough to die for…”

“Kid, instead of dying, live with me.”

As I come to my senses from Aria’s words, tears well up on her face.

‘Universe, eat all the steak we promised to eat together…’

I swore never to cry again.

“Kid, my little one. At least love me as much as I love you. Let’s live together. You are my support too.”

“I do, I do…”

“Really? Then it’s mutual.”

Aria looks so happy as if asking when was the last time she cried, overlapping with summer, it seems impossible for me to break the promise.

***

“Are you going to the academy?”

“Yeah, is there something like that?”

“Kid, you usually seem quite smart, but you reveal your ignorance in unexpected places.”

“David. You’re always ignorant, so be quiet. Yeah, Kid. Typically, noble children go to the academy in the Sanctum around the age of 15. They build connections and study their majors there.”

“Kid, you must be into swordsmanship, right?”

“Why? If Kid is loved by spirits, maybe magic isn’t bad?”

Although I haven’t said I’m going yet, seeing them arguing about my major peacefully, it seems peaceful.

“Well… Your guardian hasn’t mentioned the academy yet.”

“Really? It’s almost time for admission… Are they not planning to send you?”

“Alright, David, you train here! Kidney. Let’s go see the garden!”

“Yes yes. Selina, my lady.”

***

“You, are you really not going to the academy? With your skills, you could definitely succeed at the academy.”

“Hmm.. I appreciate the vote of confidence, but isn’t it enough here? Good friends, loving guardians, and an environment to train in swordsmanship. I am content here.”

“But if you go there, you could meet more diverse people. Prince Kane, the socialite Frill. Etc.”

“I’m not interested in making connections with people…”

“And, we’ll be there too, David and I.”

Selina suddenly stood up from under the tree stump she was sitting on and exclaimed with a slightly flushed face.

“I want to go with you! To the academy!!”

“Haha, alright. I don’t want to part ways with you either. I’ll ask the lord for permission.”

“Really? Ah, let’s do that after so long!”

What pleased Lady Apple was precisely handling spirits. Perhaps because she was impressed by the campfire incident last time, she often asked to bring out the spirits to touch them.

“Right. So kind. How come they listen so well?”

“They resemble their master, right?”

“Eh. That doesn’t seem to be the case at all.”

She burst into laughter at the puzzled expression as if she had heard something strange.

“Wait a moment. I’ll join in too.”

We spread our hands wide and played the role of the spirits’ playground.

Certainly, compared to us, the liquid spirits looked like children, and their pure running around was a pleasant sight.

“It’s fascinating. How do these spirits follow so well?”

“Is it genetic? Since the lord often used spirits.”

“But you seem exceptional… Anyway, now that we’ve decided to go to the academy, we should start participating in society as well. Preparations, preparations!”

“In society… What’s the closest upcoming event in society?”

“Well… Frill Yeong-ae’s birthday party that I mentioned earlier? David and I are planning to go that day too.”

“Great. If I go with you guys, I won’t have to be alone in a corner at the social gathering.”

“You wouldn’t be left alone… would you?”

“Huh? Oh. It’s David. Looks like his training is over.”

“Hey. Kidney, let’s have another round today!”

“Sure, let’s finish up quickly and grab some food.”

As they head to the academy or get more involved in society, they feel a sense of regret that times for sword training and such will decrease.

“Let’s go quickly! Knock them down and let’s eat! Tonight, it’s steak with an apple flavor!”

“I will win for real today!”

“Yeah, with a recent record of 4 wins and 15 losses.”

“Hey! You should support your family!”

“Kidney is like family to us.”

“That’s true.”

They decided to focus on the present moment rather than getting caught up in complicated thoughts.