episode_0001

‘What kind of person was I?’

That was the first thought that came to my mind when I came to my senses in the pure white space that seemed to make me go crazy.

There is a saying that a person’s life cannot be judged lightly until death.

No matter how miserable your life was, it may not be known until later on, but this story does not apply to me at all now.

“Hoo···”

The last memory that remains in my head.

It was a very narrow corner of the room.

A shabby and dirty room, far removed from the fancy houses seen in dramas.

That’s where I died.

“Really··· This is ridiculous.”

Aged 24.

My death might be in the newspaper.

The cause was a heart attack.

I occasionally heard on the news that the incidence of heart attacks among people in their 20s was increasing, but I never imagined that it would be my story.

“I’ve often thought about wanting to die, but I never thought I’d actually die.”

When each day is painful, I often think about dying.

So, if I died young, I thought it would be suicide.

But surprisingly, most of life’s endings are dry and boring, and I was one of them.

If anyone is interested in my death, which is probably not even famous on the Internet, it will probably be an article that pops up on a banner in passing.

[20-year-old dies. We can no longer be at ease with heart attacks among young people···]

It will be known to the world at this level.

In some ways, that could be seen as a positive thing, and it could just be added to the number of deaths.

‘What kind of life have I lived?’

When you can still think after you die.

The first thing a human being can do is look back on his or her life.

When I searched through my hazy memories, the oldest memory I could remember was when I measured my height against a wall.

There were no complicated or deep concerns at that time.

‘The next memory is···’

Kindergarten and school.

A story about a life filled with boring school commutes and uncomfortable interpersonal relationships.

These were gloomy memories that were quite different from the friendly and lively story that you see in a comic book.

Of course, there were small happinesses, joys, and friends in it, but it was far from being a happy and fulfilling youth.

He was neither a hard worker who ran toward his own dreams nor a child who had an active social life and became the idol of his class.

Rather, it was closer to the kind of story that wanders and stumbles.

‘Some people might say that’s youth… but when you look back after dying like this, it’s just full of gloomy stories.’

Then when I first became an adult.

I felt like I had everything in the world and that I just had to work hard and enjoy the world.

In my head, I thought the world was not an easy place, but deep down, I was just a lazy college student, nothing more, nothing less.

And the price was steep, and with great effort I finally became a member of society.

As an office worker, my life is a cycle of going to work and coming home from work.

It was more painful and boring than I imagined.

But that was human life.

And as the saying goes, humans are animals of adaptation, and we have become accustomed to pain.

‘And then it suddenly ended…’

I can’t say there was no happiness or joy at all, but it wasn’t rewarding or enjoyable either.

Most of my life was filled with boredom and suffering, and I had to learn to endure it, almost by force.

There was no such thing as a happy running towards a dream like the characters in dramas, or any interesting events.

A story full of wandering, gloomy progress, and ultimately a petty death.

‘Really… it’s so trivial that no one will even care.’

After looking back on my life, the order seemed set and obvious.

These are things that make me wonder what it would have been like if things had been like this in the past.

I wonder what would have happened if I had just punched that kid back then.

If I had put money in there, I could have enjoyed more things.

Countless regrets roaming through my head.

Most of it was regret for the patience that had turned into meaningless and the actions wasted in a short period of time.

He would have expressed regret, saying that he wished he had lived an honest life rather than a life of debauchery and desire.

But my life was neither true to my desires nor was it one where I lived faithfully by setting goals.

As I thought about it, all I felt in the memories that came to mind was emptiness.

“Really··· I don’t want to live like that again.”

How convenient it would be if God told us when we would die, like in a game.

If I had known I was going to die, I would have been more faithful to my desires and not have endured uselessly.

At least I could have lived a more enjoyable life.

If it were a movie, I would probably say that if I went back here, I would live the same life, but I was not the main character who had such a beautiful life.

Waiting at the end of the suffering was another suffering, and what was needed to survive it was patience.

Patience to endure irrationality.

Patience to endure misfortune.

Patience for what you don’t have.

Patience to endure whatever action one wants to take.

Some might package it as effort, but I thought differently.

Results… Can patience without reward be called effort?

If you put it in the correct way, it wouldn’t be wrong, but as someone who endured it my whole life and then suddenly died, it was something I absolutely could not sympathize with.

Rather, the world would call them a waste of effort.

“No matter how much I think about it now, it’s meaningless.”

Suddenly, the countless thoughts that had been floating through my head felt cold.

As the reality of belated regret began to dawn on me, a sense of emptiness took over my body.

“By the way, are you still here as a ghost?”

As I was looking around, the pure white space suddenly twisted and a black space appeared as if a door was opening.

The being that appeared in the scene that seemed to open up space itself was a kind man.

And his first impression was extremely simple.

god.

I was immediately convinced by his appearance, which was exactly like the image of what a God would look like if he existed.

“I never thought it would really look like this.”

The voice that came out of his mouth was indifferent.

The calm reason after accepting death was not shaken by meeting God.

Instead, I was filled with questions about why he had appeared before my eyes now.

“That’s the quickest way to explain it to you. Surprisingly, explaining it is quite a hassle.”

“That’s the person I think of… no, I guess that’s the existence.”

He stroked his chin for a moment, pondering, then opened his mouth.

“It’s somewhat similar, but it’s not exactly correct. Still, it’s okay to understand it that way.”

“That’s a pretty good explanation.”

“You don’t seem like you’d be interested in the complex systems of the world right now, do you? If you want, I can explain it to you briefly over the course of a few days.”

There was nothing wrong with what he said.

There were countless systems on Earth that I didn’t know about, but I didn’t need to know them all in detail.

I just need to know what information I need.

“But why are you here now?”

“Usually by now, at the latest, death has been accepted to some extent and is easy to explain.”

He approached slowly, with leisurely and relaxed movements.

His gait seemed to exude a noble aura, overwhelming the surroundings with an atmosphere that was difficult to describe.

“As you probably already know, you are dead. And you have to make a choice.”

“Select?”

When I instinctively asked him out of curiosity, he smiled as if he was happy.

“You will be alive again now. Do you have any wishes before that?”

“Is the wish list a choice?”

“That’s right. It’s unknown how much it will be reflected, but it’s better than not saying anything.”

At that moment, I felt like my head was going a little blank.

I used to think like that.

Think about what wish you would make if a genie from a lamp appeared before you.

At the time, I think I had planned it out in my own way, but when a similar situation arose, I couldn’t think of anything.

Besides, I couldn’t even guess to what extent what I said would be reflected.

But then one thought flashed through my mind.

“I want to live true to my desires.”

When he heard that, his face distorted grotesquely and he burst into laughter.

“Hahaha! Desire! What a simple but difficult spell! Alright! I’ll pay the most attention.”

At least his reaction was positive.

That’s why I wanted to ask what would happen next.

But strangely, my lips and my body did not move.

“Then I will pray that we don’t meet again. For your sake.”

My body was quickly disintegrating.

There was no pain in my legs, lips, and arms that were turning to dust.

“I hope you won’t regret it this time.”

As he finished speaking, his vision turned black.