Episode 170. Confirmation (6)

“Then why… Haa…”

Click.

“Monica.”

“Finish your meal. I’ll get up first.”

Monica put down the spoon she was eating with and stood up from her seat. Edward tried to follow, but Monica glared at him fiercely, stopping him.

“Don’t follow me.”

“I can’t do that…”

“I clearly said it.”

Tak.

Monica passed Daria, who was bringing in the meal, and left the dining hall. Edward couldn’t bring himself to stand up because of Monica’s murderous glare and the warning not to follow. He could only stare at the door Monica had disappeared behind.

“Please follow her quickly.”

“…She told me not to follow.”

“You clearly did something wrong this time, so shouldn’t you follow and apologize? Women tend to say the opposite of what they want when they’re upset.”

So, because she told me never to follow… does that mean she definitely wants me to follow? Always calm and collected… except during sex, of course. Listening to Daria, who had a very professional and trustworthy expression, it somehow felt like that was really the case.

“Perhaps you’re worried that the Count-nim will get angry…”

“I was going to follow her anyway.”

Heum heum.

Edward hurriedly got up from his seat. He told himself in his heart that he was going to do this anyway, and it wasn’t because of Daria’s words. But he didn’t forget to express his gratitude to Daria as he passed by.

“Thank you.”

“…Yes.”

“Um…”

“Hm?”

Daria called out to Edward as he was about to leave. Then, in a very small voice, as if whispering, in case anyone outside could hear.

“…Don’t try to hide anything, it’s better to tell her everything.”

…

Nod.

“Why did you come?”

“Monica…”

Without needing to go far, Monica was standing alone in the dark hallway right in front of the dining hall, looking out the window. I was worried that she might have gone somewhere out of sight in the meantime and I’d have to look for her.

“I told you not to come… Heup.“

Hearing her voice again, it was full of tears. She was holding it in earlier… She didn’t want to cry in front of me, so she went out alone… I felt even more sorry and couldn’t say anything.

Should I do it or not? I was worried about whether she would get angry, but. I carefully approached and quietly hugged Monica from behind. I couldn’t hug her tightly with strength like usual, so I was careful in case she would break. I put my arms around her like a fence and slowly narrowed the gap.

“I’m sorry. It’s my fault.”

” Heuk. Heueuk…”

Fortunately, Monica didn’t push me away or avoid me this time. She was just sobbing quietly and shedding tears. In that position, I waited for Monica’s answer for several minutes.

“You bad bastard…”

Is she going to hit me? No, hitting is an old habit, but… I reflexively tensed up and my body was full of strength. But Monica spoke in a voice that was much more tired and weak than I expected.

“You know I hate cheating the most…”

I did it on purpose at first because she hated it the most… And it’s true that I like Vera-nuna. But there’s no way I can say this in front of Monica, so I just listened silently as if I didn’t have a mouth.

“My mom and I suffered so much because the former Head of the Family cheated… Heuk. He even seduced my mom.”

Seeing her say ‘former Head of the Family’ instead of ‘father,’ I can feel how much she hates him. Vera-nuna said that their marital relationship wasn’t good, but I didn’t know there was such a situation… I just thought she had strange tastes.

“Tell me honestly. How many women are there besides me?”

Vera-nuna, Winnie, Daria, Marie-nuna, Allen… Names popped up in my head one by one, and I was sweating more and more as time passed. I wondered if it was right to say all of this, but I remembered the advice, or rather, the warning, I had heard from Daria.

‘Just tell her everything as it is…’

…Won’t she get even angrier if I tell her the truth…? Especially the Mountberne story… Should I do it or not? Anyway, excluding that, I knelt down on the floor naturally with the intention of confessing everything. I felt a bit guilty about continuing to hold Monica…

“You’re even kneeling…?”

Nod.

“Vera… Yulstein’s mother-in-law, Winnie Melbourne Viscount, Daria, and there’s…”

Monica’s face doesn’t show much change in expression, perhaps because it’s information she already knows. But the suspicious look of ‘there must be more’ hasn’t disappeared yet. The Marie-nuna story… Yeah, let’s do it. It’s the right thing to do.

“When I went to… Mountberne.”

“When you went?”

“Your sister-in-law and, slightly…”

To say it was ‘slightly’ was a bit of an understatement, since I was prepared to get her pregnant and ended up having a child, but shouldn’t I say I did it ‘slightly’ in words? Of course, Monica was shocked by the fact that one more came out from a place she didn’t expect, regardless of whether it was ‘slightly’ or not… or rather, she was half resigned.

“…Mountberne was… more than a few months ago. How many people were there…”

“No, I can explain this, Monica.”

Looking at me with a face that said, ‘Okay, let’s hear it,’ I recalled the events that took place in Mountberne a few months ago and told her the story. Without an heir, the current Count, my brother, collapsed, and the family was on the verge of being cut off. I just made a child at the request of my sister-in-law and her family….

I’m sorry to Marie-nuna, but I really did it with the thought of just making a child. Without any personal feelings, and I haven’t seen her face once since then. Officially, it’s not even my child, so I won’t see her in the future.

“So. There’s one more woman who got pregnant before me…?”

“…That’s true, but…”

“Heuk, Heueuk…”

Monica started crying even more sadly this time. She’s bowing her head and covering her face with her hands, but I can see her expression roughly because I’m kneeling. Should I not have said it…? But I can’t hide it anymore for the sake of my conscience….

“…Is one sister-in-law the end?”

“Next to her… there was one knight. That’s really the end.”

“Haa…”

I’m aware of her mood, but since I’ve started talking, I feel like I have to tell her everything honestly, so I even told her about Allen. Monica, with a half-resigned expression, sighed once and rubbed her reddened eyes strongly before saying to me.

“Heup. Get up. A Yulstein… doesn’t kneel so easily.”

“I didn’t kneel easily. I’m really sorry…”

“I know, so get up.”

I thought my legs were going to die because the blood wasn’t flowing. I staggered slightly with my numb legs and stood in front of Monica.

“Do you know that? I knew you were doing it with the maids. With weird fetishes too.”

…She knew.

I thought she was saying a lot of things that made me feel strangely guilty, but it turns out she was giving me hints. Come to think of it, Monica came when I was doing it with Daria in the bathroom. I thought Daria had submerged and wasn’t caught, but it seems she knew from that time. It could have been even earlier….

“I thought that doing those things with Daria meant I wasn’t enough. That I wasn’t doing my role properly as a wife. That I had to accept everything, but I got tired and fell out first… Since maids are just physical relationships, that’s why, that’s why, I tried to understand. But…”

That’s how it started with Daria at first. I got competitive and changed as I did it….

“Haa… But there are too many to just let it go… Were they all just physical relationships?”

“Monica. I really…”

“No, no. Haa…”

Monica, who let out a deep sigh, hesitated for a moment and then said the exact opposite of what she had said earlier.

“…Follow me.”

Three days have passed since Monica found out about me.

Winnie was kicked out of the main estate as if she was being expelled, and returned to her empty house after that day.

After telling Monica that she would ‘do anything’. Because Monica ordered her to return to her. That was all.

No one was there, only her.

Her friends, the people who took care of her like her own mother, and… the person she loved were not there. To that house.

I’m sure I used to be fine there. How many days have I spent there that I feel so empty? I brought a lot of the things I used to use in Yulstein Castle, so is it because it feels even more empty because there are empty spots here and there?

In that state, she didn’t do anything and just sat still on the bed. If it weren’t for Daria, who came three times a day to bring her meals and forced her to eat little by little, saying that her body and baby would be harmed, she probably wouldn’t have eaten at all.

Before I was caught, Edward’s existence suppressed the simple and vague anxiety. After confirming Monica’s expression, that reaction, that face, I couldn’t do that at all. I felt self-loathing for what she had done, but I felt disgusted with myself for not having the courage to give up Edward.

Beolkeok-

It’s definitely the middle of the night. Daria already came to bring dinner earlier. Who could it be… As I was thinking, her door opened.

“…Ah.”

There stood Monica with a very angry expression, and Edward, who was just looking at Monica’s mood. Before she could answer with her cracked voice. Monica threw a small bottle at her and said.

“Eat it.”