Am I a Saint? – 1

It rained. It was a sudden rain in late autumn.

The raindrops, which had been moistening the ground one or two at a time, seemed to be angry at the unyielding earth, bringing even distant relatives to beat against the ground.

People were thrown into confusion by the rain that fell before the harvest. Some had already harvested, but most were in a situation where they would have to return it to the soil.

Farmers rushed to the wheat fields despite the torrential rain, hoping for even a small yield.

The rain continued for two days, and there was no sign of it stopping on the third day either.

Due to the unprecedented rain, all official events were canceled, and the people at the Order headquarters devoted themselves to self-cultivation, except for the morning service.

With his schedule canceled, the Saint remained locked in his room.

People were puzzled by his seclusion, as he had been very active recently, but soon thought that the Saint must have some intention.

In fact, the Saint had no intention at all. He was just staring out the window with sunken eyes.

The Saint, who used to drink tea with his attendants and write unknown letters, was nowhere to be seen.

His pupils, devoid of any light, resembled the dark clouds that covered the sky completely.

What was similar was that there was no brightness whatsoever.

As Maria, who was assisting him, dared to judge, the Saint seemed to have received a great shock.

“Sister Maria, a letter has arrived.”

The sudden summons came when she was reproaching herself for her ‘obscene behavior.’

Maria asked the Saint for permission and headed to the reception room. The Saint simply stared at Maria as she left the room, for no particular reason.

It didn’t take long for Maria, who had gone to the reception room, to return.

To begin with, the facility wasn’t far away, and Maria, holding the letter, had forgotten her manners and rushed down the hallway.

Thanks to that, her heavy chest heaved up and down.

Maria, catching her breath, showed the letter to the Saint.

The Saint looked at Maria with a face that asked what it was, and Maria finally remembered that the Saint couldn’t read.

“Haa… Hoo…..”

Maria, who was about to open and read the letter, took another breath.

Maria’s green eyes quickly scanned the letter.

“Sister Maria, what is the letter about?”

“It’s a letter about Antonio’s whereabouts, as you instructed before.”

“I see.”

Maria tilted her head as the Saint spoke listlessly.

Wasn’t the Saint the one who was most interested in Antonio?

Suppressing the urge to ask the Saint immediately, Maria continued to read the letter.

“……..”

Maria’s face, which had been reading the letter with a light heart, gradually hardened.

The Saint’s face, which had been watching the scene indifferently, gradually filled with questions.

“Saint…”

Maria, having finished reading the letter, moved her lips and looked at the Saint.

The rain was still falling. Late at night, the Saint sat alone in the darkened room, staring out the window.

It was a night when the moon was hidden by rain clouds. It was the same as the day he had boldly gone out for a night walk.

The Saint’s fingers tapped the table rhythmically.

He was thinking and urging himself on.

It was his way of trying to regain the strength he had lost.

For a short time, his eyes alternated between the window and the bed.

He was hesitating.

“Hoo….”

He let out a long sigh and covered his face with his hands.

Lethargy was buried in his breath.

After wasting time for a while, he got up.

His steps led him to the closet, not the bed.

In the closet was a Priest’s robe that had been suitably altered.

The Saint put it on. And he covered his face with the remaining cloth.

The rain was still falling. It was the heaviest rain of the year.

The Saint entrusted himself to the rain and disappeared into the darkness.

It was a road he had seen while riding in a carriage, but walking it on foot made the distance feel doubled.

Still, grateful that it was downhill, the Saint went down to the village.

The fact that the visibility was not perfect due to the rain worked to his advantage. Thanks to that, he was able to avoid the guards’ eyes even with his clumsy body.

The Saint kept pulling up his rain-soaked clothes, which kept slipping down.

“Pass the bridge and the fourth house on the second floor.”

To not forget what he had heard from Maria, the Saint constantly repeated the address.

After walking for a long time and arriving at the village, the square was empty.

Well, it would be more suspicious if there were people walking around in this rain.

“Pass the bridge and the fourth house on the second floor.”

The Saint’s eyes scanned the square.

Beyond the direction where the beggars had disappeared, which he had seen on his way back from Madini Village, he could vaguely see a bridge.

The Saint urged his heavy body to move.

Under the bridge, there were a few homeless people trying to light a fire with wet branches.

Watching them struggling to avoid the rain, the Saint crossed the bridge.

The fourth house after passing the bridge was hardly a house at all.

The old and unmanaged house was in the form of a villa where many people lived.

Unfortunately, the stairs were built on the outside, so the Saint had to go up to the second floor while being exposed to the rain and wind.

The Saint stood in silence for a moment in front of the rotten wooden door.

Instead of his silence, the rain made a sound as it beat against the ground.

He took a deep breath and knocked on the door with his hand.

Lying in bed, Maria couldn’t easily fall asleep.

She aimlessly stared at the ceiling and recalled Bible verses, then got up again.

It was because she had a lingering feeling of unease in her heart.

The Saint’s eyes, which had recently shown no attachment to the world, had changed after hearing the news about Antonio.

Maria would have been happy if it had changed for the better, but it wasn’t, so she was troubled.

Maria recalled her conversation with the Saint.

It wasn’t much of a conversation. It was just her unilaterally reciting the contents of the letter.

“Antonio’s family is currently in Solchio Village.”

Solchio Village. It was the name of a village attached to the Order.

“It seems… they came here directly from Albainin Village.”

“Why….”

The Saint’s hoarse voice demanded detailed information.

“It is written that Antonio’s family was ostracized in Albainin Village. The reason is….”

“Because of Antonio’s dismissal.”

“Being dismissed means he committed a sin, so it was natural for people in other villages to ostracize him.”

Maria added.

“Dismissal? Wasn’t it that he couldn’t adapt and returned to his hometown?”

The Saint said as if he couldn’t understand.

Maria pursed her lips inward and lowered her eyes.

She seemed to be contemplating what to say.

“Yes. It is said to be a dismissal. Dismissal is… a punishment given when a clergyman does not behave properly or commits a great sin according to the Bible.”

After contemplating for a while, Maria slightly averted her gaze from the Saint and opened her mouth again.

“He’s just a child before he’s a trainee Priest. He can make mistakes in his behavior, can’t he? How could he be dismissed….”

The Saint muttered as if he couldn’t believe it.

“Saint, Antonio was not dismissed for not behaving properly.”

Maria interrupted him for the first time.

“Antonio was dismissed for blasphemy.”

“Blasphemy?”

The Saint confirmed again.

“Asking questions without the Saint’s permission… is the reason for Antonio’s dismissal.”

Maria said with difficulty.