Chapter 76 : The Fanatic Who Faced the Abyss
by fnovelpia
Netkama.
A term used to describe someone who pretends to be a woman in games or online communities, despite being male in real life.
When a mysterious sinner boldly introduced themselves as a “Netkama,” the chat exploded.
•LMAOOOOO.
•It’s the abyss… the abyss… the abyss… the abyss.
•Lee Jiah’s stream really is the abyss, fr.
•What a glorious way to end this arc lol.
•Cult leader’s face tho lol.
•She looks so freaking flustered lol.
“Give me a moment to think. Please wait just a little bit.”
[Okay…]
Yeah.
Even though the word “accepted” came out of my mouth, I was definitely caught off guard.
Why?
Because I felt a pang of guilt.
There’s a similar concept to Netkama in the virtual streamer scene.
People often call it Bermiyuk.
Bermiyuk.
A shortened term for “an old guy or boiled pork wearing the body of a virtual bishoujo,” referring to men who use female virtual avatars.
Like Netkama, Bermiyuk belongs to the domain of the abyss.
However, at the very least, Bermiyuk don’t deceive their viewers about their gender.
Sure, there are exceptions, but most Bermiyuk openly say, “Yeah, I’m a Bermiyuk,” from the start.
When I first began streaming, I asked myself this very questio:
So.
Am I a Bermiyuk?
Well, biologically speaking, no.
According to the Wiki, I’m not a Bermiyuk either.
Because my actual gender is not “male” but “female.”
But.
My mental gender—my identity—is still clearly male, and I haven’t accepted my biological gender yet.
Because if I did accept it without resistance…It feels like my whole world would collapse.
Thus, I am both a Bermiyuk and not a Bermiyuk.
And seeing this sinner confess to being a Netkama brought up a lot of thoughts.
I’ll say it again:The facial tracking of the Omnia Archive program is on par with, if not better than, full motion capture.
[User ㅇㅇ has donated 2,000 won.]
Why does the host look like that?
She looks kinda guilty.
Apparently, my subtle and complex expression was fully exposed on stream.
So the host was a Netkama Bermiyuk all along?!
•Plot twist of the century lol.
•Sweat began running down my back.
•But then the follow-up chat completely shattered the tension.
•Bermiyuk (Large capacity holy power pouch)
•Bermiyuk (Boob zone 10/10)
•Banned by the mod.
•Dammit, Shinpyung!
•I said hold it in, lol.
•Honestly, you wouldn’t call her a Bermiyuk if you saw her half-cam stream, fr.
•Uhuhuhuhuhu.
•Ah, now I’m thinking about it again… I gotta rewatch it.
•Huh? Didn’t the host delete the VOD? How is there a rewatch?
Some brave soul on the fan café shared it. If you copy and decrypt the code, it gives you the link.
•Thank you.
•Brave soul-nim 😊😊😊😊😊.
•You’re the only one.
•Thank you.
•Tonight’s plan is set.
Who would’ve thought that the embarrassing “half-cam” stream would come in handy like this.
Whatever, let’s move on.
If I keep pondering whether I’m Bermiyuk or not, it’ll just end up sounding like I’m blaming Beachy Mutbyeol.
And a devoted follower must never blame their god, mm.
“…”
No.
Honestly, I do resent them.
Damn it, when are you giving me back my dick, you damn deity?
Just fix my gender already.
Thud!
Thud!
Thud!
“Gguh-ek…”
•What’s with her all of a sudden, LOL.
•Totally outta nowhere again, lmao.
“J-just had some intrusive thoughts for a sec…”
[Anonymous has donated 3,000 won.]
•Yo, I bet this guy was thinking maybe Beachy Mutbyeol is a Netkama too, lmao.
•Oh.
•That’s it.
•You go to Seoul National?
•Or Harvard?
•Wait, do viewers have to interpret the host’s surprise RP now or what, lol.
Leaving the overanalyzing viewers behind, I let out a deep sigh.
It seems.
Beachy Mutbyeol really has no intention of restoring my gender.
…
…
…
My intrusive thoughts dragged on.
Thank you for waiting.
“Sinner, speak.”
[I… I am, as I mentioned before, a Netkama.]
Wait, why does this person’s voice sound so good?
•Their tone even sounds kind of feminine.
•H-heeeung… onii-chan.
•Uhuhuhuhuhu.
•A man? Even better! A man? Even better! A man? Even better!
Just like the viewer said, there was something oddly feminine about the sinner’s way of speaking.
This person… probably.
They might be capable of using a female voice.
But if they used it here, it’d basically expose their real identity—so they’re probably sticking to a male voice.
“What sin have you committed?”
[I deceived someone. To be more precise… I deceived my friend. No, not just a friend. I think I deceived someone who meant more than that.]
“Uh, um… I see. Oh. Yeah.”
My inner abyss-sensing alarm began to vibrate.
Any more of this story, and I’d be staring into the abyss.
Not just a regular abyss.
One so deep and unknowable that no human mind could comprehend it.
Sweat began to bead on my forehead.
What should I do?
Do I keep listening… or not?
Honestly?
I’m curious.
So curious it’s killing me.
Let’s hear it out for now.
This person probably gathered a lot of courage to come confess their sin like this.
I nodded.
It was a sign they could continue.
The sinner went on, confessing their story—their sin.
Their first meeting with this “friend” had been—[We first met in Minas Land.]
“Agh, you again, Minas Land?”
I’m so done.
Seriously, it’s about time you stopped showing up.
The sinner’s Netkama behavior hadn’t been intentional from the start.
The sinner naturally had a feminine way of speaking, and that tone carried over into chats as well.
Because of that, the friend assumed the sinner was obviously a woman.
The first sin was that the sinner didn’t bother correcting that misunderstanding.
The sinner had always been a loner.
Even if it was someone they’d only met through a game, this friend had become incredibly precious to them.
To protect this twisted relationship.
The sinner chose silence.
Then one day,The two of them decided to go on a raid together and agreed to voice chat.
“Screeeeeeeeaaam!”
A total crisis.
I’m just the one hearing this story secondhand, and even I’m shaking in fear.
“So… um, s-so what happened then?”
•Are we listening to a radio drama or what, lol.
•Host is hella immersed right now, lmao.
•But honestly, I’m kind of invested too;;;
•Listening to this… I kind of feel bad for them. Is it just me?
•No Netkama sympathy.
•Look, call it what you want, but it is sad, right?
•Don’t care. If it’s entertaining, I’m in lol.
•This drama’s pretty good.
•I’m starting to get creeped out.
•I’m scared to hear the rest.
The sinner spoke.
[For days before the raid, I practiced using a female voice like my life depended on it.]
“And… did it work?”
[Yeah…]
The sinner paused briefly.
Then continued:
[Like this.]
With a voice more feminine than even mine—gentle and soft—they flawlessly spoke in what could only be described as a perfect female voice.
“…Holy shit.”
A curse naturally slipped out of my mouth.
And the viewers were just as stunned.
•What the hell.
•That voice is stupidly pretty lol.
•I’m losingmymindI’m losingmymindI’m losingmymind.
•Noonaaaaaaaa.
•Unobserved = female.
•Unobserved = female.
•Unobserved = female.
“Possible.”
“…You’re telling me you got a female voice down like that after just a few days of practice?”
[I’m not sure either. Maybe I was just… talented?]
No way.
From what I know, getting a convincing female voice isn’t something just anyone can do.
Even if you have talent, it takes months of painful practice to maybe sound passable.
And even then, there’s usually still a bit of a masculine hint.
But this person… They weren’t even using the typical high-pitched “fake” female voice.
They were doing a low-toned, natural female voice.
In other words.
[User ㅇㅇ donated 2,000 won.]
She’s just straight-up a chick, holy crap.
Uh.
Yeah.
Let’s… move on.
Anyway, the sinner, who had somehow miraculously pulled off a perfect female voice, said they quickly became close with the friend.
The tone was serious, and the sinner’s voice was filled with regret and raw emotion.
Even the previously chaotic chat grew quiet and solemn.
[Maybe it was just my imagination, but I think… that friend really opened up to me. Happy moments, painful ones… they shared everything.]
“So, what happened next…?”
[Well, I’m sure you’ve figured it out by now… that friend confessed to me.]
“…Haah.”
I knew this was coming.
The fact that a Netkama came to make a confession already told me what kind of story I was in for.
I didn’t bother asking him “why did you pretend to be a girl online?”
Some might misunderstand, thinking this is about judging sins—especially after all the heretics who came in causing chaos.
But right now isn’t a time for judgment.
It’s a time for forgiveness.
I could more or less understand why this sinner was burdened with guilt.
He had continued deceiving someone—his one and only precious friend—right up until they confessed to him.
He had plenty of chances to tell the truth.
Still.
I don’t think it’s too late.
“Don’t worry. Under the name of Beachy Mutbyeol, I’ll give you a proper ruling and a path forward. Now then, here’s what you need to do—”
[Um… Jiah. My story’s not over yet.]
“…What?”
[There’s more.]
“Oh. Wait. Please, stop—no, right?”
[…I accepted their confession.]
“GYAAAH! H-how long ago was that? Three days? Four? If it hasn’t been a week, maybe there’s still time to fix—”
[Days? If that were the case, I wouldn’t even be here right now.]
“Oh, no…”
[It’s been 99 days… Tomorrow would’ve been day 100.]
•“JIYAAAAAAAH!”
•JIYAAAAAAAH!
•JIKKIYAAAAAAH.
•100 days you sonofa—GYAAAAH.
•I’m losingmymindI’m losingmymindI’m losingmymind.
•Why does this feel so sad… sob sob sob.
•I’m mad but I also feel bad… it’s just… complicated.
[So… what do I do now? It’s too late to undo everything… right? sniffle]
The sinner began to cry.
Don’t get the wrong idea.
This person’s a man.
But seriously, why—why are they even crying in a girl voice?!
“Haaah… Just give me a second. Let me think…”
Not that I actually had any great solution in mind.
Just like the woman said—Damn it, I’m confused too now.
Not woman.
Definitely not.
Just like the sinner said…It’s probably too late to undo things.
It’s settled.
“…I don’t think I’m really in a position to say anything.”
Mm.
It was an irresponsible answer.
But honestly, giving any kind of judgment here would be even more irresponsible.
I wanted to tell him to just be honest and come clean.
But… I’ve got a few secrets I haven’t told my viewers either.
Hmm.
Mmm.
•I really don’t know what to say.
•Stay strong.
•The chat turned into a library.
•Ah, I don’t know about all that, but if the streamer’s jujyu is big, automatic like.
•Auto like lol.
•Bang! lol.
•Divine Power Pouch! lol.
•These lunatics.
Why is that their way of trying to break the awkward atmosphere?
The sinner kept sobbing for a while.
Eventually, in a much calmer voice, they said:[Thank you, Jiah. Thanks to you, I feel a little more at peace.]
“Have you come to a conclusion?”
[…]
The sinner thought for a long time.
Then, with a voice full of certainty, said:[Yes.]
“Then I’m glad.”
[…I’ll leave a follow-up post on the café later.]
“Uh… I don’t think you really have to go that far…”
[No, I think I’ll only feel truly relieved after writing a follow-up. Anyway, thank you.]
And just like that—The call ended.
And with the end of a story far too heartbreaking to just call “another dive into the abyss,”
The Confession content came to a close.
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