If You’re Going to Betray Me, Do It Quickly

Zhou breathed heavily with a completely exhausted face. If she hadn’t already fallen for me, she would never have shown such a vulnerable side in front of me no matter what. Rebecca’s words are somewhat correct.

She has already fallen for me to some extent. Not just her body, but her heart too. Perhaps, I even have a feeling that I could manipulate her as I please.

…The Chen Yayuan problem needs to be solved. If Rebecca Katerfeld is the key to solving it, I must borrow her power. But is it okay to put Zhou Lizhi in a defenseless situation because of that?

“You know, Lizhi. I made a promise to myself that I would never do it again.”

“Never do what again?”

“I vowed that I would never again watch someone I love die in a fire pit. Do you know what the method was?”

“Not loving anyone.”

Zhou Lizhi answered too easily. While I was momentarily surprised and frozen, she shrugged with a charming smile.

“It’s too easy an answer, isn’t it? Eun-young. You can tell just by looking at a person. Originally, ordinary people care more about their body than their heart. They feel like they won’t die if their heart is stolen, but they feel threatened if their body is taken. They don’t know anything, right?”

“…Getting hurt emotionally can be painfully enough to die too.”

“Yes. People who don’t know that, they always do. How should I put this… Even if the other person hurts my heart… I think I can endure and live with it. So I give my heart easily. They cherish their chastity while easily giving love. But that’s not how the world works. It’s rather easier to live by giving up chastity easily and cherishing the heart. Isn’t that right?”

“…It seems so.”

“But you say you love me?”

“The clock has started moving. I had stopped it with great effort. I had stopped it, vowing never to let it move again. It seems I accidentally pressed it because my mood became unsettled as my body’s condition changed.”

“Is it because of me, or because of Churchill?”

“Do you really need to hear an answer from me? Do you think it doesn’t matter what answer I give?”

“No, I won’t listen. Come to think of it, it might matter.”

Zhou Lizhi chuckled.

“If you answer that it’s because of that precious Briar Churchill, I feel like the anger I’ve just suppressed might burst out again.”

“Both… What’s the point of two pieces of trash…”

“Eun-young, if you’re going to betray me, do it quickly. I’m urging you, aren’t I?”

Zhou Lizhi’s hand trembled lightly.

“I still don’t know what your true identity is. I know that everything you wrote in your resume is a lie, but since I’m not the type to diligently report such things to the Investigation and Statistics Bureau, I haven’t reported anything. You’re a suspicious woman. Whether you’re from the National Intelligence Service or somewhere else, you’re not an ordinary college student.”

“I’m not an ordinary college student. Our school’s entrance exam is difficult. They say Chinese prestigious university entrance exams are difficult, but Korea’s academic ability test isn’t easy either, is it?”

“As difficult as it was to become a jinsa in Joseon, could it be as hard as passing the imperial examination in China? You seem to have passed some even more difficult test. Wasn’t it a lie that you only realized your ability at the beginning of this year?”

“Haha…”

“Communicate with the outside. I’ll cover for you. Just… don’t even bother going through Korea. What does it matter if a letter comes from Europe or if a letter comes from America? Do as you please. As you please.”

“Lizhi.”

“Just quickly receive instructions. If the order comes to strike me down, just strike me dead. You can do it, can’t you? If you hold poison in your mouth while kissing, that would be the end. Would I refuse if you offer your lips?”

“Major, please.”

“If you’re going to betray me, do it quickly. Don’t make me sincerely expect anything. Don’t mind me, if you have a place to receive orders from, receive them quickly. Ask quickly how you should deal with this Zhou Lizhi.”

“Even if I were someone following orders from somewhere, do you think I could just scurry off and write a letter after hearing you say that?”

“I’m being sincere.”

“Zhou Lizhi. Let’s just assume what you’re saying is true. That I’m a member of some big organization who came to monitor you, and that I’m such a scary person who could kill you with one word from above. Let’s just imagine and assume that for a moment. How about it?”

The Major nodded with a slight smile at my words.

“Zhou Lizhi, despite all that, I love you.”

“Isn’t it because you know that’s sincere that you’re telling me to betray you quickly?”

“Why on earth are you saying such things?”

“You heard what I said today, didn’t you? You clearly heard what I’ve been babbling about for days, no, weeks. You see, I’m a dangerous person. I’m plotting things in my head that even Europeans wouldn’t want, even Russians wouldn’t want. No one truly supports me. There are plenty of people who would obey if I show my power, but there’s no one left in this world who would follow me out of love. Isn’t that right?”

“Is that really important?”

“I’m going to do something someday. I’m a woman who has no choice but to. And the day when I have to do that isn’t so far away.”

“Think carefully. You might really get badly hurt.”

“But why do I keep thinking about you?”

Zhou Lizhi clutched her head.

“I’ve had many lovers. There are many here too. You know those girls in the bunker next door who bow their heads and blush when I approach? Most of them are girls I’ve drawn into my bedroom. I still receive letters occasionally. Asking why I haven’t called them this semester, if I’m tired of them. I’ve even received harsh questions like if they’re just discarded masturbation tools. I keep thinking about them too. I’m full of desire to call them again. But you know what, I’m not calling them again. What do you think is the reason?”

“It’s not because of me.”

“It’s not entirely unrelated either.”

“Because the time for rebellion is approaching?”

Zhou looked at me silently.

“If things go wrong, I can just burn alone. I don’t want to involve foreign girls who shouldn’t be touched in my playing with fire.”

“Except for me.”

“You were a suspicious woman. I thought I wouldn’t feel guilty even if I dragged you into the fire pit with me. But it’s strange. I intended to seduce you with such a light heart, but instead, you tied me up. You tied me up, threw me down, made me kneel, kissed me, sucked me off. It was strange. That was… strange.”

“Wasn’t the strangest part that you were happy despite all that?”

“I drew you into this pit thinking you wouldn’t stay on my mind, but when the time comes, you’re the one I think about the most. So if you have to betray me, just betray me quickly and catch me and kill me. Can you do that? If you put poison in your mouth while kissing, that would be the end. Would I refuse if you offer your lips?”

“Major, please.”

“If you’re going to betray me, do it quickly. Don’t make me sincerely expect. Don’t mind me, if you have a place to receive orders, receive them quickly. Ask quickly how you should deal with this Zhou Lizhi.”

“Even if I were someone following orders from somewhere, do you think I could just scurry off and write a letter after hearing you say that?”

“I’m being sincere.”

“Zhou Lizhi. Let’s just assume what you’re saying is true. That I’m a member of some big organization who came to monitor you, and that I’m such a scary person who could kill you with one word from above. Let’s just imagine and assume that for a moment. How about it?”

The Major nodded with a slight smile at my words.

“Zhou Lizhi, despite all that, I love you.”

“Isn’t it because you know that’s sincere that you’re telling me to betray you quickly?”

“Why on earth are you saying such things?”

“You heard what I said today. You clearly heard what I’ve been saying for days, no, weeks. I’m a dangerous person. I’m plotting things in my head that even Europeans wouldn’t want, even Russians wouldn’t want. No one truly supports me. There are plenty who would obey if I show my power, but there’s no one left in this world who would follow me out of love. Right?”

“Is that really important?”

“I’m going to do something someday. I’m a woman who has no choice but to. And that day isn’t far off.”

“Think carefully. You might really get badly hurt.”

“But why do I keep thinking about you?”

Zhou Lizhi grabbed her head.

“I’ve made many lovers. There are many here too. You know those girls in the next bunker who bow their heads and blush when I approach? Most are girls I’ve drawn into my bedroom. I still get letters occasionally. Asking why I haven’t called this semester, if I’m tired of them. I’ve even got harsh questions like if they’re discarded masturbation tools. I keep thinking about them too. I’m full of desire to call them again. But you know what, I’m not calling them again. What do you think is the reason?”

“It’s not because of me.”

“It’s not entirely unrelated either.”

“Because the time for rebellion is approaching?”

Zhou looked at me silently.

“If things go wrong, I can just burn alone. I don’t want to involve foreign girls who shouldn’t be touched in my playing with fire.”

“Except for me.”

“You were suspicious. I thought I wouldn’t feel guilty even if I dragged you into the fire pit. But it’s strange. I meant to seduce you lightly, but instead, you tied me up. Tied me up, threw me down, made me kneel, kissed me, sucked me off. It was strange. That was… strange.”

“Wasn’t the strangest part that you were happy despite all that?”

“I thought you wouldn’t stay on my mind when I drew you in, but now you’re the one I think about most. So if you have to betray me, just do it quickly and kill me. You love me, and since the woman I love is already in this game, I either want to walk together and make you part of my China’s people, or just offer my neck and make you safe. Eun-young, you’ve beaten me. Can’t I give my head to a woman who has the right to subdue and kill me?”

“Are you being sincere?”

Zhou Lizhi swallowed hard at my question.

“I’m sincere.”

A moment of silence passed.

What question should I ask?

What should I say?

…Should I just ask this question? It might sound ridiculous… but should I first ask the one question that’s really important to me?

“Are you… a communist?”

“What? No! That’s absurd!”

Zhou Lizhi denied it with disgust. I chuckled and patted her shoulder.

“Then I’ll help you.”

“…Is it okay not to contact any higher organization?”

“I told you I’m just an ordinary college student, didn’t I? What higher organization, for heaven’s sake. How many times do I have to say there’s no such thing? The National Intelligence Service, the military, they all have nothing to do with me. It’s just your misunderstanding. Let’s leave it at that.”

“Eun-young, I’m not in the mood for jokes. Contact whatever organization. I’m telling you to act after getting a definite answer.”

“If I receive orders, I have to follow them.”

“Isn’t that what I’m saying?”

“No orders will ever come to me. Because this is Guangzhou, and it’s too secure for any organization in the world to infiltrate. Even if someone tries to contact, how could it work? It’s nonsense.”

“Shin Eun-young, you…”

I said nonchalantly.

“Zhou Lizhi. There’s only one valid order for me now. I vowed never to let a woman I said I love walk into death again. Now what should we do? Shall we talk about whether to go to Beiping or not, starting with that?”

“Because of that talk about love or whatever, you’re ready to betray your organization?”

“University is nothing, I’ve already dropped out so there’s nothing to betray.”

As I continued with my brazen attitude, Zhou Lizhi seemed at a loss for words and bowed her head deeply.

“What do you think? Is going to Beiping the way to live? Or is staying the way to live? If we go, is committing treason the way to live, or is staying obedient the way to live?”

“Wouldn’t more strong superhumans be better?”

…Let’s think about two purposes now.

Ensuring safety and accelerating the investigation.

There must be a way to achieve both goals. There must be… there must be…

“Make a counter-proposal to Nanjing.”

“What kind of counter-proposal?”

“Propose to take me and Churchill with you. Since we’re the most excellent and powerful superhumans in the current class, propose to include us as part of the foreign delegation for the memorial service and share the on-site guarding. It means Maestro and I go to Beiping with you.”