Chapter 71

Chapter 71

71: Blood Born Erzsebet Vladimir. Nickname: El. Race: Human, of course, and successor to the Blood Demon Mogi. And her past life’s name was Kim Seung-oh. Of course, as you can tell from the name, he was a man. And an otaku who loved anime and manga. She didn’t want to talk about it, but the evidence was too obvious. In his past life, Kim Seung-oh was so obsessed with vampire characters that he had a blonde, blue-eyed, beautiful vampire girl as his profile picture. Her insistence on the vampire concept may have been her way of living in this world. Whether she did it simply because she liked it, because she needed to, or because she chose it to overcome the confusion of gender and values, I don’t know. …Maybe it’s because of the Blood Shadow Demonic Art. Let’s just assume that out of pity. But the fact that Kim Seung-oh got the Blood Demon’s martial arts means that his will even broke through the odds of a random gacha? In that sense, the knowledge we gained may have been random in name only and actually greatly influenced by our tendencies. Lee Seong-cheol and the Sword Saint don’t seem to have much in common, but the Heroic Earth Art, the Sword Saint’s actions befitting a hero, and Emily’s self-proclaimed manly attitude are quite fitting. In my case… I hate to admit it, but the Yin Demon Art suited me surprisingly well. I wondered if Emily could have become like me if she had obtained the Yin Demon Art, so if it’s said to suit her, it must be true. Actually, at this point, there’s nothing to admit or hate. And Kim Seung-oh’s gender also changed. Including me, all three people we’ve found so far have had their genders changed, so at this point, I suspect that the entire class has had their genders changed. …But we’re a co-ed class, so does that mean the girls have become burly men? There’s no reason they all have to be burly, so there must be pretty boys too… No, that’s not the point. “Sigh…” Anyway, as I reasoned that, my grand goal of finding the kids and eating them one by one seemed to weaken a little. Of course, I could do it if I wanted to, but a man with a woman’s insides? That’s a bit ambiguous. It feels kind of anticlimactic… …Can anyone hear this? Now that things have come to this, I decided to renew my resolve. Whether they’re men or women, whether they were men or women, it doesn’t matter. If I find them, I’ll pounce on them and taste them for sure. Life should be fair. …They might be shocked, so I should use a more subtle approach if possible. While I was making my resolution, Emily was talking to Erzsebet. “Ahahaha, what, you were Seung-oh?” Emily laughed amusingly and patted El (Kim Seung-oh, male, total age 36) on the back. Unlike us, she was reincarnated into this world four years earlier. In that sense, the reincarnation times of us transmigrators may all be different. In fact, even though Emily and I are the same age, our birthdays are different. “Ugh, stop it…” Where did her dignity from ten minutes ago go? El was cowering in a corner, like a middle schooler whose secret had been exposed. I can’t understand her feelings, but I can sympathize. Everyone has those times. “It’s okay, it happens. But, was that line from a manga? I thought it was pretty cool. ‘From the darkness of eternity….'” “Aaaaaah!!! I was wrong, please stop!!” Emily didn’t seem to have any malicious intent, but El couldn’t stand that kindness and screamed in despair, bowing her head. It’s kind of funny to see El, who seems the most mature of us, acting like this, but it’s her own fault. She should have listened to people earlier. “Huh? U-uh…” Seeing El collapse, Emily nodded in embarrassment. She had a big heart, but her way of comforting was wrong. Everyone has embarrassing moments from the past, but that doesn’t seem to apply to Emily. After a period of reflection that was bound to be a little long, El regained her composure. She looked down at the floor with hollow eyes and greeted us again. “Hoo, heehee… I’m really glad to meet you guys…” I need to correct myself. It doesn’t seem quite right to say she recovered. Her shoulders are slumped, and her gaze is wavering. Feeling sorry for her, Emily reached out to her with a worried expression. “…Seung-oh. You look a little down.” “It’s okay. She’s growing through pain right now. As ‘Erzsebet Vladimir’.” When I grabbed Emily’s hand and said that, El flinched again. She covered her head with her arms and answered in a barely audible voice. “D-don’t even say that name… please… just call me El.” So she’s not giving up on that nickname after all. She must really like the name. // After a brief conversation, we introduced ourselves to each other. It’s a little late, but we can’t skip it. “Emily Artion, and Laila Freeman. And Emily is Lee Seong-cheol, right…” El repeated our names as if to remember them and nodded. But only for a moment, she looked at me with sharp eyes and asked a question. It was a serious attitude, putting aside the embarrassment from before. That must be pretty hard for her. “Then, who are you?” I had a feeling that question would come. I smiled wryly and looked back and forth between El and Emily. “….” Emily wasn’t saying anything either, but I could see curiosity peeking out from under her awkward expression. Well, I guess so. Emily and I haven’t been traveling together for long, but we’ve become close so quickly that it feels like we’ve known each other for much longer. I should be grateful that she hasn’t asked me about myself until now. She must have been holding back her curiosity and trusting me. Now I have to repay that trust. “It’s weird if you don’t even reveal your name. How can we believe that you were in our class in our past life?” El’s expression becomes stern when I don’t answer. Even though she showed us a disgraceful side of herself, she has gained her own experiences living in this world. She has mastered the Blood Shadow Demonic Art and has the determination to hide in the underworld. She was once Kim Seung-oh, but she is no longer the Kim Seung-oh we used to know. As such, the question she asked was a valid suspicion from the perspective of a woman named ‘Erzsebet Vladimir’. We weren’t the only ones reincarnated into this world that day. Although most of them are from our class, so the probability is very low. “….” I looked down at the candle on the table. The flickering candle was dancing like my troubled and conflicted heart. Even if I didn’t reveal my identity, it wouldn’t be difficult to prove that I was once a classmate. There are plenty of memories that only we from our past life know. But the problem I’m struggling with isn’t about that. It’s more fundamental and important. It’s about why I want to hide myself. The reason I didn’t tell Emily about my past life was simple. I was ashamed and scared to say it. Since being reincarnated into this world, I’ve lived a life worse than a rag. I’ve slept with countless men, goblins, and even monsters, and I’ve even enjoyed it. I don’t deny that part of myself. I’ve lived a life that is abnormal, dishonorable, and wouldn’t be strange to be despised and hated, but even so, I plan to continue living that way in the future. That’s who I am, and that’s how Laila Freeman lives in this world. But even though my sexual shame has faded, the deep shame in my heart hasn’t disappeared. Regardless of what I’ve decided, I was afraid of Emily comparing me to my past self and didn’t want her to do that. Yeah. I just wanted Emily and the friends from my past life that I’ll meet in the future to see me as Laila. Because I’m a dirty woman worse than a whore, I wanted them to think of me as an unidentified person. If they don’t know who I am, at least they can protect the memory of ‘my past self’ in their hearts. Facing that feeling, I realize. That’s how much I cherish myself and my past self. I didn’t want the memory of me in my friends’ memories to be tainted. It was a faint symbol that was nothing more than an illusion, but at the same time, it was the last fragment of self-love left in my heart. But now, I don’t need to rely on such illusions.

-Squeeze.

I reached out and grabbed Emily’s hand. “….?” Emily tilted her head at my sudden action, but didn’t ask why. Just like she accepted me as I am, she doesn’t ask. Emily. You hugged me after hearing the story of my violation and told me that you were turned on by it. I’m so grateful for those words now. I’m going to live the way I’ve lived in the future, and even so, I won’t be despised by you. Even if I’m despised by other friends I’ll meet in the future, I’m confident that I won’t be hurt by it anymore. I’m now determined to throw the memory of myself that was sleeping in my heart into the mud. I’m ready to throw a boy named Seo Hyun into the muddy swamp called Laila. I don’t know if this is because I’ve become stronger, or because I’ve become so corrupt that I can’t even feel that shame. But even if the path I’m taking is a path to hell, I’m satisfied just by the fact that I’ve taken a step forward. So, now I can say it. “I am-” “W-wait a minute!” However, before I could finish my sentence, Emily covered my mouth. …Why? Not only El, but I also looked at Emily with a puzzled expression. “U-um, you don’t have to say it if you don’t want to…” “What are you talking about? Aren’t you curious?” El retorted with a dumbfounded face, but Emily didn’t back down either. With an uncharacteristically stiff expression, Emily opened her mouth. “Of course I’m curious. But, maybe you don’t want to say it.” “….” Was she thinking of me? Or does she not want to know who I am? I was about to worry, but I shook that worry out of my head. That’s because it’s not even a problem to worry about. “It’s okay. I’ll tell you if you’re curious.” “…Huh?” That’s right, I can just ask directly. I tried to smile and looked at Emily. I thought I was good at acting, but this is the first time I’ve given a wry smile while trying to smile brightly. I looked into Emily’s brown eyes and continued. “I don’t think there’s any reason to hide it anymore. If you want, I’ll tell you honestly.” At my words, Emily’s eyes widened in surprise, “….Okay.” Then she gave a wry smile and nodded. Seeing that, I realize once again. She said those words for my sake. Whoever I am, Emily won’t despise me. There’s no need to be surprised or shocked after hearing about me. What Emily has been with is a girl named Laila, not ‘my past self’ who remains in a vague memory. Whoever I was, I am Laila now, and I will continue to live that way. I slowly opened my mouth and took out the name that I had once buried in my heart. “Seo Hyun. That’s my name.” // After hearing my name, Emily and El stared at me for a while, “Eek!?” “What!?” And shouted in disbelief at the same time. I was momentarily flustered by that powerful shout. “H-huh?”

Hold on a second. I didn’t expect you to be this surprised. Seriously, why are you so shocked? I didn’t know why, but Emily looked genuinely stunned. Seeing that made me wonder if I should have said anything, but the milk had already been spilled. I steeled my resolve and decided to move forward. Though not as much as Emily, El was equally astonished. She pointed at me, stammering. “Seo, Seohyun…? You?” “Yeah. I’m Seohyun.” Regaining her composure, she gave a wry smile and nodded. The two of them looked at me, each with a shocked expression, and voiced their thoughts. “That smart, handsome, and popular Seohyun?” “…It’s a little different from what I remember, but yeah, I guess.” Personally, I didn’t think I was that popular, nor did I think I was that handsome, but since there’s no other Seohyun, I guess it’s me. As I nodded, El shook her head in disbelief. “Wow, crazy, this is insane. I can’t believe you were reincarnated as a woman… and such a cute one at that…” “I don’t think you’re in any position to talk.” “No, but you shouldn’t be like this. I didn’t think you of all people would be like this; I was sure you’d be some great noble, or a powerful mage, or an emperor…” “…What power do I have to be any of those?” Even so, their expectations are too high. I immediately retorted to El’s words and then looked at Emily. Emily’s condition was slightly worse; she was clutching her head and muttering in disbelief. “…Jackpot, did I seriously have sex with that Seohyun!?” What is she trying to say so proudly? I quickly reached out and covered Emily’s mouth, sighing as I continued. I had brought up my name from my past life, but I was reluctant to keep mentioning it. “Anyway, I’m Layla now. No more calling me by my past life’s name. Got it?” “I guess that’ll be more familiar. You can call me Er… El, too.” El inadvertently opened her mouth, then made a sour face and corrected herself. It seemed that the matter of the ‘Great Erzebet who has lived for countless eons’ still remained a sore spot. …That wound will probably never heal. I wonder if even mastering demonic energy to the extreme would cure it. I turned my gaze away from El and removed my hand from Emily’s mouth. “And Emily, I’m sorry for hiding it until now.” At my words, Emily widened her eyes in surprise, then grinned. It was her unique, bright smile, playful yet lively. “It’s okay. It’s nothing. I can understand it well enough.” Hearing her answer, I let out a sigh of relief inwardly. So deeply that I wondered if I had ever felt this relieved before. “…Thanks.” ———= Author’s Notes ———= I’ll do a double update… on the weekend… Have a good night, everyone.