Chapter 68: A D-D-D-Date? Rin, you…

“A d-d-d-date? Rin, don’t tell me you…”

“It’s not like that! I just have a movie I want to watch, that’s all!”

“Heeh… So Rin likes me enough to want to go on a date…”

“Th-that’s not it…”

“I understand perfectly. So, instead of Rin, I should call you ‘honey’ now, right, honey?”

“D-don’t say that!! …It’s embarrassing…”

“Honey~”

“Kyaaah~!!”

---

It was definitely a scream coming through the speakers, but I could vividly picture Rin’s flushed face.

For a moment, I had the illusion, ‘Could she really like me?’ but I didn’t let it show, merely swallowing the thought.

If a beauty like Rin wanted to date me, I’d be more than happy.

Besides, Rin is fun to tease, so having a girlfriend like her would be the icing on the cake.

Well, she has the flaw of not being able to keep things tidy… but I’m the same way.

“So. What movie are we watching?”

“Huh? You’re accepting?”

“Of course. It’s Rin, after all. I can go on at least one date with you.”

“Hooooh…”

“If you want, I could even offer myself once…?”

“Wh-wh-what kind of shameless thing are you saying!!!”

“Well, just kidding.”

Even if it was Rin, I’d have to think seriously about genuine yuri.

I engage in business yuri for broadcasts, but if it came to real lesbian stuff, well…

In the first place, I’ve never seen it on Euptomi, so I don’t know much about it, and actual marriage is impossible.

(TL note: Euptomi appears to be a fictional platform or website.)

But then again, if Rin confessed, I think I would probably consider it.

To define it simply with the word ‘yuri,’ Rin meant more than that to me.

Perhaps Miho is closer to what I think of as ‘that yuri’?

The so-called ‘keu-ssa-re,’ a crazy psycho lesbian.

Well, in her case, the strange attribute of being a lolicon was added.

“For the movie, I was thinking of watching ‘Path of Fire’ that just came out.”

“Ah, the one where they use avatars in a metaverse world?”

“Yes.”

“Sounds fun. I was planning to watch it when I had time anyway.”

“Then what time should we meet tomorrow? The movie starts at 7:30.”

“Let’s meet around 6. We can have dinner and then go watch it.”

“Okay. See you tomorrow then.”

“Yep.”

And so, my date with Rin was set.

---

That evening.

Sitting in front of my computer, I was thinking about broadcast content when I blankly stared at the clock.

[Friday, March 31st]
[10:32 PM]

“Ah. Come to think of it, tomorrow is April Fools’ Day.”

Isn’t April Fools’ Day a great day for content farming?

A magical day where any lie can be brushed off with an ‘Ahaha, it’s April Fools’ Day, lololol’.

It’s a day where you can do even more idiotic things than usual, and everyone will laugh it off.

It seems I can’t just prepare today’s broadcast material casually.

I could have just broadcasted as usual, cracking lewd jokes, but since it’s a special day, I didn’t want to do that.

I wanted to show the viewers even a little bit more.

“Hmm… What kind of broadcast can I do on April Fools’ Day…”

Should I just troll by saying I’ll do a face reveal?

It would be hilarious if I showed up wearing one of those horse masks trending on the internet…

Well, rejected.

Especially since Lunaverse is sensitive about the ‘red pill,’ Manager-ssi wouldn’t let me do such a broadcast.

Then, should I just put “I’m sorry” in white text on a black background?

It’s the best method when I’m out of material, and it draws attention well, but…

“Still, it’s too cliché…”

Apologizing when there’s nothing to apologize for.

It wouldn’t make for long content, and it’s a dead-boring, unromantic idea.

Of course, its attention-grabbing power would be S-tier, but I couldn’t throw away all other fun for the sake of aggro.

I considered other methods like using a male voice changer, or something shocking that would surprise Japan and horrify America, but…

Ultimately, the conclusion I reached was very simple.

“A day like this is when I need to return to my roots.”

Who am I?

The young lady from the moon, Yuki.

A young lady character based on the Tale of Princess Kaguya.

Noble, pure, elegant.

Words that exist to describe me.

So, naturally, I should use a dignified and pure manner of speech.

I shouldn’t use such a vulgar tone like I do now.

Because it makes me look weak.

That would be the emotion furthest from ‘purity.’

“Now then, let us begin the ‘broadcast’.”

And so.

The broadcast of a certain VTuber, imbued with the madness called ‘purity,’ began.

---

[[Freddy’s Burger Place] Yukigenyo! It is I, Yuki, the young lady from the moon~🌙🌙🌙 [Yuki Yuki]]

[18,000 people watching]

The broadcast started as soon as it turned midnight on April 1st.

Was it because I started streaming at a different time than usual?

The number of viewers felt a bit smaller than usual.

Well, it was still a considerably large number, nonetheless.

“Yukigenyo~ It is a pleasure to greet you all!! It is I, Yuki, the young lady from the moon, it is~!!”

[-?]
[-Did you eat something weird?]
[-?]
[-lol?]
[-?????]
[-I’m scared;;]
[-Why the sudden young lady concept..?]
[-Desu-wa~]
[-What is this]

As soon as I greeted them, the chat window filled up with question marks.

Feeling that the concept was a success, I gave a deep smile, and the chaos in the chat window only intensified.

[ExpertTrainer has donated 5,000 won!]
[-Don’t tell me it’s because today is April Fools’?]

[-Ah]
[-Today was April Fools’ lolololol]
[-Ahaha lol]
[-Crazy lolololol]
[-How can an April Fools’ broadcast be like lololol]

“Today, too, this one shall commence a pure and dignified broadcast, it is~!!”

[-F*ck lololololol]
[-This is nuts lololol]
[-Teacher, I can’t get used to this…]
[-Please just talk normally…]
[-Seriously lol…]
[-I miss ‘Yuki-chan says~’…]

As expected, the Yukidan started freaking out, feeling the cognitive dissonance with my usual self.

However, I completely ignored their cries and started playing the game.

<<Freddy’s Burger Place>>

[New Game]
▶[Continue]
[Settings]
[Exit]

<<Day 6>>

The play record from months ago was still there.

Seeing that remnant of my early broadcasting days, it felt like the fresh scent of my original intentions was wafting through.

[Bellie: Cheeseburger. Two, please.]
[Okay?] [Okay]
(TL: The original has 네? [오케이] which is like “Yes?” [Okay]. I’ve interpreted 네? as a slight hesitation/confirmation from the game NPC, and 오케이 as the player’s selection, or the game system confirming)

[-Sh*t lololol]
[-Kkueeeek…]
[-My ears]
[-Save me save me save me save me save me]
[-I think I’m going insane…]
[-Can’t get used to it lololol]

Leaving the screaming viewers behind, I head to the kitchen.

Then, I immediately grill the buns and patties, and start stacking the ingredients on the burger in order.

“Place the vegetables on the bun~ Place the cheese on the patty~ And finally, drizzle the sauce~”

Sploosh, Splooosh!!

[-Ooh…]
[-Lol, is that sound for real? lololol]
[-Ooh yeah…]
[-Sploosh, sh*t lololol]
[-Heu-eung…]
[-Yuki’s white and viscous… stuff]

Something white and sticky being poured onto the burger.

At this, the Yukidan were, as usual, pouring out lewd chats, but my reaction to them was completely the opposite.

“What are you all saying right now!! You perverts, stop sexually harassing this one over mayonnaise!!”
(TL: Sekuhara (セクハラ) is short for sexual harassment.)

[?]
[What…?]
[-No, what did you say?]
[?]
[-You don’t think about what you’ve done…]
[-Seriously lol]
[Fact) The streamer is the biggest pervert here]
[-The hypocrisy is insane]

“Hypocrisy?? You must cease your slandering of this one. No matter how you look at it, am I not a noble and pure young lady?”

[?]
[Yeah, right]
[-Her first-person pronoun… isn’t Yuki-chan…?]
[-This is… April Fools’…?]
[-Pure lololol]
[-Puhaha]
[-I’mgoinginsane…]

“Anyway, this one must quickly complete the burger now. At this rate, the customer will get angry, it is!!”

Having appealed my purity to the Yukidan, I hurriedly finished the two burgers by placing the top buns.

Then, before the customer’s satisfaction dropped, I quickly handed the completed burgers to the customer.

“Here you are, two cheeseburgers, it is!!”

[Bellie: If I become a billionaire, I’ll hire you as my personal chef.]

“Oh my, thank you for the compliment, it is. A personal chef, this one is overwhelmed with such praise!”

[-Mom, I’m dizzy…]
[-Can’t get used to this]
[-It is~ It is~]
[-Desu-wa~]
[Fact) This is the RP she was supposed to do originally]
[-Sh*t lolololol]
[-Thank god Yuki ditched her RP]

“Ahem. You must not use profanity, it is. Has everyone not familiarized themselves with the broadcast rules?”

[?]
[-Broadcast rules?]
[-Something like that… existed?]
[???]
[-What, why do they actually exist?]
[-When did these appear]

“You must read them quickly, even now. If you act rudely without reading the rules, you shall be scolded by this one, it is!”

The broadcast rules I had written down before starting today’s stream.

My broadcast, which usually didn’t impose chat restrictions unless truly R-18 words appeared, was different today.

[🌙 Promises for the Stream 🌙]

1. Please refrain from chats or Super Chats that slander others, it is~

2. For spamming or trolling chats, please respond by ignoring and blocking, without reacting, it is~

3. Please refrain as much as possible from chats unrelated to the broadcast content, it is~

4. Until this one mentions them, please refrain from mentioning other streamers, it is~

5. Please also refrain from mentioning this one’s name on other broadcasts, it is~
   If there are chats that violate the rules, this one, or the manager, will respond appropriately, it is~(ʘ言ʘ╬)
   Beyond these, this one kindly requests that you always chat politely, observing internet etiquette and maintaining a wholesome atmosphere~ (´▽`)

Just looking at the design, you could feel the considerable sincerity in these broadcast rules.

Since I had to start the broadcast at midnight anyway, I had quite a bit of time, so I even created a rule sheet that didn’t exist before to fully commit to the concept.

[Richard: Cheeseburger. Double.]
[Okay?] [Okay]

“Oh, a new customer has arrived in the meantime, it is!”

[-Kkueeek…]
[-Mom, my head hurts]
[-Lolololol]
[-Kkiyoooooooooottt!!!!!!!]
[-What is this…]
[-A twisted broadcast from hell lololol]
[-I’mgoinginsaneI’mgoinginsaneI’mgoinginsaneI’mgoinginsane]
[-Lololololol]
[-Lolol]
[-The young lady form is insane!!]

A new customer arrived while the viewers were reading the rules and feeling dizzy.

Ignoring their screams that filled the chat window, I proceeded with the game haphazardly.

“Then, this one shall continue with the game, it is!”

[Okay?]

[Richard: Two patties and two slices of cheese, please.]

“A stacker burger, order received, it is~! This one shall bring it out right away, it is~!!”

And so, accompanied by the viewers’ agonized cries and the lady’s madness-infused speech.

The April Fools’ broadcast continued.