Chapter 67: something about us

“Oh, this band’s new album is out? Let’s check it out!”

In a record store, the sound of an acoustic guitar faintly echoes in the background. With an excited expression, she puts the headphones provided for listening to the music on her ears.

She closes her eyes as if truly immersed in the music, and the corners of her mouth rise involuntarily.

” This band—isn’t this the one Sia recommended when she came here last time? Do you remember?”

“…I remember.”

“Didn’t they come in second place on some audition program? Did you know that?”

“…I don’t know.”

Hearing those words, memories bubble up like soap bubbles.

She pops them without mercy, then repeats them like a mantra.

The day after I recommended that band to you, you killed your senior. And the following week, you raped me.

She lists her despicable deeds in her mind. She regains her composure, which had almost veered off in a positive direction.

She glares at me with dark red eyes, as if she’s annoyed, but when our eyes meet, she draws a gentle curve.

In the end, I was the one who looked away first, flustered.

“Oh, you didn’t watch that program? It was pretty interesting, too bad.”

“Who cares.”

“Still, you said this band was Sia’s favorite band. You said you went to a few concerts. Oh, don’t you listen to them anymore?”

“No, I don’t.”

It’s strange. It’s strange. A tingling sensation at the back of my head. A tingling sensation around my heart.

From the moment I encountered her in that basement, hadn’t I decided to let go of all those trivial feelings? Hadn’t I confidently declared that this path was truly the best for both her and me, setting aside my own chaotic emotions?

“Last time, Sia bought this for me here. Should I buy it for you this time?”

“…No need.”

She threatened me by mentioning my close friends, and in return, I called Isaka and had him punch holes in her body.

Even Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt didn’t do this. If we had been lovers, we would have parted ways after landing a punch on each other’s faces.

My head is spinning with random thoughts.

But when I see her acting like she used to when we were close, I feel a sense of joy, as if I’m facing fond memories from my childhood.

I can’t control my true feelings, which are running wild like a colt. Am I too fickle?

“Still…it’s a rare opportunity.”

“It’s not necessary.”

Even so, I try to suppress my emotions as much as possible and shake my head as if to say it’s troublesome, but she clings to my arm.

Her soft auburn hair tickles my forearm. I stop unconsciously, and she rubs her soft cheek against my arm.

Ahaha, her laughter rings out like a bell.

I was sinking into despair in real time, my head buried deep in a swamp, but in contrast to me, Kang Seon-ah’s face was bright with a smile.

In a moment of irritation, I pushed her body away forcefully.

“Huh, don’t push me away. Actually, I’m interested…”

“I said it’s not necessary!”

“Kak!”

“Oh my, why are they acting like that?”

“Are they fighting?”

“It looks like the black-haired one just hit her out of nowhere?”

Coming to my senses, I see the crowd around me staring at us as if watching a spectacle, and her lying there helplessly.

An unfamiliar panic overwhelms me, and I feel my pupils trembling.

“…”

I try to say “I’m sorry,” but quickly cover my mouth. What was I even trying to say? Sorry? After resenting her so much, after cursing her so much, after choking her neck with all my strength?

She’s just as much of a trashy human being as I am. Even more so than me.

She’s just pretending to be weak right now. She’s just a puppet. In fact, I’ve been deceived by her all this time… But she can’t lie, and the pain overwhelms my tangled mind.

Holding my messy hair, she approaches me with a worried expression. No, it’s Kang Seon-ah.

“Are you okay, Si-ah?”

Even though she was the one who was hit, she asks me if I’m okay. Why?

At that moment, I catch a glimpse of her wrist, swollen and bright red.

And above it, the bandage that was wrapped tightly around it is still fresh, with the center stained bright red.

“…What’s that bandage?”

“Huh? It’s nothing. I accidentally cut myself while cooking…”

“Stop lying and tell me the truth.”

“…Actually, I got hurt fighting with the security guards in the basement. It’s not a serious injury, so don’t worry.”

If I could, I’d grab his wrist and examine it closely. Is he really okay? Or is he hiding a serious injury?

And I can’t understand myself, which drives me crazy. The internal conflict spreads endlessly. Doubt whips my exhausted brain cells.

Why? Because I still can’t shake off the remaining feelings? Because that wound was inflicted while saving me? Because I miss the days when we were friends? Because I still want to go back to those days?

…If all of that is true, then what should I do?

“Don’t be silly. I’m not worried about you.”

“Haha… that’s right.”

Even as she smiled awkwardly, her shoulders trembled slightly. If I reached out my arms, I could hug her right away,

but it was a foolish thought.

That strange feeling remained stuck in my throat, but the date continued.

Kang Seon-ah seemed to be trying to relive the days when we were good friends, visiting only the places we had once gone to together.

The record store, the movie theater we had once gone to, the restaurant we had once gone to, the clothing store we had once gone to.

We watched movies together, ate together, shopped for clothes together, and before we knew it, it was getting dark outside.

The waning moon slowly rose, faintly visible.

“Is there still more?”

“Just one more place, the last one.”

I frowned slightly, but Kang Seon-ah remained cheerful throughout. My tone was tinged with irritation.

Kang Sun-ah smiles awkwardly. I can’t help but look away.

I feel like I’ve done something wrong, and my already gloomy mood becomes even more irritable.

My tangled thoughts remain tangled, showing no signs of unraveling.

Once a friend, now an enemy, I’m still unsure how to treat her. Why am I continuing with these pointless worries?

After all, today is the last day I’ll ever see her face.

Resentment and desire will fade away with the moonlight of this night. So there’s no need for petty considerations now.

“Is it autumn already? It’s been almost a year since we met.”

“It doesn’t matter. We won’t see each other again anyway.”

“…Huh, that’s right.”

Kang Sun-ah looks up at the dark night sky and speaks. Only the crescent moon, like a cut fingernail, shines brightly.

She absentmindedly follows the stars,

but there is no bright yellow twinkle anywhere.

We all move our legs busily. She grabs my arm and drags me along. I walk mechanically, not knowing where we are going.

“Do you remember when we first met?”

“…Not really.”

“When we first met, I don’t know how you felt about me… but I still remember it clearly.”

Perhaps because of the night breeze, her cheeks are tinged with a pale red.

“To be honest, my first impression wasn’t great. You were so overly friendly that I thought you were trying to torment me for just standing there.”

“…Why?”

“Well, just by looking at you, it seemed like we lived in completely different worlds. I already felt so insignificant, and you made me feel even more so. Before I met you, I had no friends, nothing. No, I didn’t even have anyone who would approach me so kindly.”

I casually glance at her face as she walks beside me. Even in the darkness, her auburn hair glowed softly, and her mascara emphasized her mischievous eyes.

She was a little paler than before, but she was still gorgeous. Whatever the case, she was far from shabby.

“So I couldn’t help but be snappy. I was embarrassed and uncomfortable. No one had ever been so friendly to me before.”

“That’s a lie.”

“It’s not a lie. It’s true. Why, don’t you remember? Those big round glasses…”

“Glasses?

What are you talking about?”

“…You really don’t remember.”

She suddenly uncrosses her arms and walks ahead.

Standing in front of the marble fountain, she turns to look at me.

The faint moonlight beautifully illuminated the girl’s figure.

“Are we there yet? Can we go now?”

“Sia.”

I wanted to run away. Even though it wasn’t me who committed the crime, but her.

I knew that, but I couldn’t bring myself to look her in the eyes. Even though it wasn’t me who should be ashamed, but her.

I lower my head like a sinner and plant my feet firmly on the ground.

Before I know it, I’m at the station. Her voice drifts in faintly, like an old radio.

I’m afraid of her.

Because I’m afraid this worthless heart will lean on her again. I’m afraid I’ll hold this fragile friendship in my heart again.

Even if I try to glue the broken glass back together with tape, it will break again in no time.

So, self-denial, even if it’s meaningless, self-denial. I begin to chip away at her, even though there’s nothing left to chip away.

Cry.

“You’ll probably deny it, but I still love you. So, really.”

“Huh, a confession of love now?”

“Yes, now. But I still wanted to say this in the end.”

She raises the corners of her mouth and gives a faint smile. Her dimples are shallow, and her eyes are moist but not tearful.

Now, even if she makes a pitiful expression like a dog that has lost its owner, it’s just disgusting.

Past memories are like a curse; no matter how much you want to forget them,

they won’t fade away. I know how much blood is on your hands. I know what your hands have done to me. So stop pretending to be pitiful.

Like lovers who broke up for a stupid reason. I should be pouring out those curses, but for some reason, our lips are stuck together and won’t part.

I desperately try to open my mouth, but my parched vocal cords remain silent.

After a while, I finally manage to open my mouth and squeeze out a voice.

“You are—”

“Police! Don’t move!”

“Oh, the police are already here? I wanted to go to that library together in the end… It’s a shame.”

“What, what?”

Suddenly, the police officers surround us like a circle. Before I can even scream in panic, the silver gun barrels glint menacingly, aimed at both of us.

“The suspect is a murderer who killed 21 people! Don’t let your guard down!”

“Wait, wait a minute! Why are you doing this suddenly?”

“I said shoot if you move!”

“Stop it!”

The word “murderer” snaps me back to reality.

Something is definitely wrong. Those people must be misunderstanding something. I shout, but the gun barrels don’t lower. Countless gun barrels are all aimed at her head.

I was definitely trying to kill her, but now that she’s in danger, her ugly past flashes through my mind, leaving me blank.

Have I regained the friendship I lost? I yell meaningless insults at the police who are still aiming at her, while she slowly, very slowly, takes her hand out of her pocket.

The black barrel of the gun was pointed at her.

“Right, Sia.”

“What are you doing?”

“Sia is a good person. No matter how bad I am, if I die in front of you… you’ll remember me forever, right?”

“What…?”

“Don’t worry. Sorrow doesn’t last forever, only memories remain.”

“Don’t talk nonsense! Put that gun down right now!”

“…Goodbye. I hope you’ll be happy without me.”

“Wait…”

Even though the suspect pulled out a gun in the middle of the park, the incompetent police officers could only aim their guns at her without taking any action.

And before I could finish my last words,

-Bang!

“Ah…”

Unlike in the movies, there was no slow motion to compose my thoughts.

Just a single gunshot rang out, and in the next moment, red liquid gushed out of her small head like a fountain. In an instant, it

rose into the sky and fell like rain, soaking me, and my eyes quietly took in the red scene.

There was no slight tremor, no violent agitation. Just calmness. My mind still cannot accept the situation.

The sticky blood pooled on the floor seeps into my shoes. Looking down at my clothes, which still retain a faint warmth, I see colorful red

stains on my white dress. The vivid redness makes my eyes dizzy, and for a moment, I lose consciousness.

The pungent smell of metal tickles my nostrils, and I look at the spot where she was standing just a moment ago. Her skull is completely crushed.

Her flesh is torn apart, and sticky white brain matter oozes out from between the pieces. It’s a gruesome sight.

“What the… Hey, call an ambulance!”

“Aaaah!”

“What is that?”

“Are you okay? Are you okay?”

The panicked police officers shouted, and the onlookers who had been watching the scene let out piercing screams. Everyone was in a state of chaos, but only I and her body were enveloped in an eerie silence that didn’t fit the atmosphere.

For some reason, it felt like none of it had anything to do with me.