Chapter 63 : Dream Therapy

“You make strange noises despite your appearance. Your face looks fine.”

“I don’t want to hear that from you…”

There was a funeral. The deceased numbered twelve in total. This was the combined number of students and other related personnel.

It was a surprisingly small number for such a sudden ambush, but that did not make the number any less comforting.

The entire academy was given a week of rest. This was both to allow time for mourning the unfortunate event and to give time for necessary

countermeasures.

After that incident, I locked myself in my room for three days, endlessly meditating. I didn’t even eat properly.

Not even understanding what I was doing, I immersed myself in guilt and tortured myself. What I was doing was akin to self-harm disguised

as training.

Then, on the third day, my mind suddenly cleared. Perhaps my body sent a strange signal because I hadn’t slept or eaten properly? My

suffocating sadness began to ease. Grief, as an emotion, often dulls unexpectedly, against one’s will. However, I wasn’t completely numb. It

felt like I had built a dam inside my heart that could break at any moment.

I thought about going to visit others, but I was too embarrassed to face them.

There was no particular reason not to visit, but I feared that seeing their faces might only make me numb. I was afraid that my emotions

would degrade into cheap feelings that could be soothed by a few comforting words.

So, I ended up here, at this tavern. It was the closest to the academy, located near the harbor. I had been here before after coming from the

black market. And perhaps Haela wasn’t just casually saying to meet here, as she was sitting in the same spot I first saw her.

It didn’t seem like she had been waiting for me, though. She was supposedly one of the two saintesses on the continent, so it must be that she

had nothing better to do. Naturally, I sat beside her like last time.

“Are you feeling a bit better?”

Despite holding a large mug of beer in her hand, she was trying to comfort me as a saintess might. I was mentally awake, but I didn’t feel

better. The sky was gloomy, as if it was about to rain.

Haela, who always seemed so carefree, was aware of what had happened at the academy. This incident was a major issue, practically

equivalent to a declaration of war.

For the past few decades, the demon race, which had been quiet, had declared war once again. Naturally, this would be something of great

importance to her as a high-ranking member of the church.

“…I’m not okay.”

Because our first meeting had been intense, my tone towards her had become somewhat harsh. When you think about it, she was much older

than I was, but she didn’t comment on that.

As she sat at my table and set down her beer mug, my small glass of liquor wobbled and spilled a bit. What a waste.

I remember being threatened by Amitter not to drink, though it wasn’t really a threat. I wasn’t scared, so I secretly came out.

I had clearly broken the rules, but I guess it’s true—I’m not suited for drinking. It started to cloud my mind and I began saying nonsense.

“Haela, someday you’ll become a wriggling tentacle monster. You’ll be spreading yourself all over, making holes in people’s bodies, no

exceptions.”

“What’s all this nonsense?”

“I’m just joking.”

In the latter half of the story, Haela, too, becomes a tentacle monster, consumed by the teachings of the heretics and demons. But what she

had wanted all along was the happiness of everyone.

She wasn’t transparent, but even she couldn’t reach the conclusion of everyone’s happiness. In fact, that goal was an impossible, absurd

desire.

So, I too aimed for that, but I knew I couldn’t walk the same path as her. I had already decided not to regret it any longer. Not wanting to

become a wriggling tentacle monster was just an added bonus. What would I even do with that?

I continued sipping my drink in silence, and after a while, Haela spoke up, perhaps bored with the silence.

“Are you really that exhausted?”

Even if it was just small talk, I didn’t look alright. My appearance was far from neat or orderly, having stayed up for three days. Dark circles

under my eyes weren’t out of place.

I kept sighing and wearing a gloomy expression.

“…Honestly, I’m not okay. Do you know any way to make things better?”

It was a surprising thing for me to say, but I’d never experienced the death of someone close to me before. Excluding my childhood

memories, which were hazy, this was my first funeral.

I didn’t want to feel regret, but what I was doing now felt more like mourning soaked in sadness.

Haela, in her own way, tried to comfort me and gave me some advice.

“When you’re feeling like this, sometimes it helps to cover those memories with something else. By the way, do you have someone you’re

seeing?”

“Uh, no. Nothing like that.”

“Is there someone you like?”

“Is that really important right now?”

It’s common knowledge that love is also a virtue for a saintess, but this felt a bit too forward.

She sighed as if she were disappointed and looked at me with a pitiful expression.

“Oh my, Treya. How old are you now?”

“I’m just at the age of adulthood.”

I answered while finishing the drink in my glass. I considered having more, but then realized I had no one to take care of me, so I decided

against it. If I kept drinking, I’d really be done for.

But really, I wanted some proper advice. If I stay like this, it’s bound to have an effect on my health. I must have looked too indifferent, as

Haela quickly finished her beer in one go.

“Well, if you really want, go back to your room and do some self-gratification. It’s the best way to forget about these random thoughts.”

“…Self-gratification?”

It was a term I had never heard before. Could it be something like meditation?

When I gave her a puzzled look, she mischievously curled her left hand and shook it up and down.

“Oh? Don’t pretend you don’t know. People your age should all know, right? Like… you know…”

“Wait. Are you really a saintess?”

The image of a saintess I had was someone compassionate, who could embrace everyone, but this woman—was she some kind of succubus?

She didn’t hold back any words.

Why did the gods give such a person the title of saintess? That giant, divine power pocket was surely big enough to embrace everyone, but

still…

She shrugged as though asking what the problem was. If I stayed here much longer, I felt like I’d become just as vulgar as she was.

“Thanks for the advice… but I don’t think it helps. I’ll try to forget in another way.”

“Already leaving? I’ve just begun.”

“Well, I’ll be going now.”

“I can’t stop you. It’s not empty advice to say to stay with someone important to you—remember that!”

I replied briefly and headed out of the tavern. Though I was staggering a bit, my steps were quick. With the drink finished, staying with

someone like her would only tarnish my dignity.

The noisy atmosphere inside disappeared as I stepped outside, leaving behind a wry laugh.

“Ha…”

The path leading to the dormitory was as dark as my heavy heart. My room was probably the same. Since it was a day off, Arwen wasn’t

around, and my room felt especially dark and lonely.

Should I spend tomorrow training like a fool, just like yesterday? I suddenly realized that I hadn’t had a good night’s sleep in ages.

If I were to sleep, it would feel like I’m just being lazy, so even when lying down, I couldn’t find peace of mind. My vision was blurry, but I

didn’t think it was just because of the alcohol.

Someone was standing in front of my dorm. I could hear a voice, calling me?

As I approached, the voice in my head became clearer.

Teferi was standing in front of my dorm. Had she been waiting for me? When she saw me approach, she ran over and grabbed my hand.

She was wearing an outfit even lighter than usual. It looked almost like pajamas.

[Where have you been… Ugh, you smell like alcohol.]

“Ah, sorry.”

I wasn’t really sorry, though. I did want to thank her. Unlike the original, there had been almost no damage from the demons, and it was

thanks to Teferi’s good handling of the situation early on.

She looked at my face, then stomped her feet in worry. I didn’t look good, I suppose.

[Oh no, your skin is all damaged. I heard you’ve been cooped up in your room lately.]

“Ah, I haven’t been sleeping.”

Had my skin gotten damaged? It did feel a little rough.

But putting that aside, why did she come all the way to my dorm so late at night? Arwen wasn’t around, so she couldn’t have gotten in easily.

She must have been waiting for me.

[I knew you’d be like this, so I prepared something.]

“Prepared something?”

[Yeah, come inside for now.]

There wasn’t a rule against other students entering the dorm, so it was easy for her to get in without anyone noticing.

My room was a mess, with things scattered around, looking like a pigsty due to magical experiments.

I sat down on my bed, the cleanest spot, and took off my outerwear.

“You prepared something?”

[Yeah, you said you couldn’t sleep, right? This should help. You’ll feel better.]

Haela’s words might have been true—being with someone important to you seemed to show a possible solution.

Teferi sat on the bed beside me and asked. As she got closer, I instinctively moved back.

[Treya, have you ever heard of Dream Therapy?]

Dream Therapy? I had heard of it before.

…It was a form of therapy while sleeping, wasn’t it?