I Don’t Want to be a Villainess – Chapter 62

It was quite a long time ago when she met her.

With black, glossy hair that looked as if it would slip free even if tied, and red eyes like rubies crafted by a master artisan.

Skin so pale that one would wonder if it had ever seen sunlight, and a delicate figure that, despite being a bit thin, showed off graceful lines.

Even though she wore the same patient gown and lay on the same bed as others, her elegance was still apparent.

Of course, the room she was hospitalized in was a VIP room, and perhaps it wasn’t entirely fair to say the bed she lay on was “the same as others”.

Her voice was beautiful and gentle.

And her personality was so smooth that it seemed she could never clash with anyone.

She was the kind of person she had never seen before.

Could a person who had grown up receiving only love, with nothing to worry about since childhood, turn out like this?

No, it couldn’t be that she had no worries.

Her body was so weak that she would visit the hospital whenever she felt unwell.

Nor had she received only love.

When she came to the hospital, it wasn’t her family that nursed her.

But whenever she visited her hospital room, she always greeted her with a soft smile.

Several times a night, the IV needed to be replaced.

Painkillers were administered when necessary, and a nurse had to stay overnight to monitor her in case of seizures.

Yet, oddly, when she had to stay up all night for her, it didn’t feel too exhausting.

When she looked at her lying in the hospital bed, though it wasn’t something she should feel, an inexplicable rush of emotion welled up inside.

“Aren’t you tired because of me?”

Sometimes, when their eyes met as she lay awake, she would say that with a bitter smile.

Most nurses probably responded to her with a polite, standard reply.

No, it’s fine, it’s what we’re supposed to do.

Of course, as soon as they left the room, the nurses would return to the counter, their faces once again worn with fatigue.

But she was different.

She was genuinely happy when she spoke to her like that.

In fact, she had wanted to hear such words many times.

Not just the typical exchange between a patient and nurse in passing, but a conversation that made it feel like they truly knew each other.

So she responded like this.

“No, I do it because I want to.”

Oops.

She immediately regretted it.

She couldn’t be sure how the patient would take it.

There’s a difference between ‘something you have to do’ and ‘something you want to do’.

‘Something you have to do’ carries a sense of duty.

Whether it was because she was paid to do the job or driven by a sense of duty as a healthcare professional, there’s a significant difference between doing something because it must be done and doing something because one wants to, even if it’s a task others avoid.

Sick patients tend to be sensitive.

Many latch onto even the smallest words to start an argument, vent their anger, or try to blame someone else for their suffering.

But she didn’t do that.

“Really?”

Maybe it was because her response was different this time.

She opened her eyes wide in surprise and said that.

For a moment, a hint of curiosity flashed across those beautiful red eyes.

Ah, right.

That’s what it was.

She was just lying here.

During the day, the servants came.

But her conversations with them weren’t particularly warm.

She would try to talk to them, but they would only respond with awkward smiles and half-hearted replies.

Maybe that’s why.

It seemed like she had no intention of continuing their conversation.

Her curiosity ended with that brief moment of interest.

If she pried further, it would probably make the other person uncomfortable.

Maybe she thought it would bother her.

“…”

What more should she say?

No, it’s better not to.

If she spoke any further, she might say something wrong again.

That day, she simply bowed her head slightly in greeting and turned away from her.

*

“I’m sorry. Because of me…”

She heard those words again.

It wasn’t long after she had been discharged that she returned to the hospital.

Perhaps “returned” would be a more appropriate word.

No one in this ward didn’t know her name, as she had been in the hospital for so long.

The cause was unknown.

At least physically, no cause could be found.

Without a diagnosis, her body grew weaker by the day.

By nightfall, seizures inevitably came, and even while lying comfortably, she would often scream and tremble.

Caring for her became increasingly difficult.

If the room hadn’t been a VIP suite that cost as much as a night in a five-star hotel, the hospital might have already given up on her treatment.

When it comes to patients without money, the hospital’s response is always the same: There’s nothing more we can do.

Whether it was unfortunate or fortunate, her family seemed to have money.

At least enough money to care for an illegitimate daughter who hadn’t even married yet, through college and the health issues that arose afterward.

Though they didn’t have the love to tend to her needs as carefully.

“Don’t worry. I do it because I want to.”

This time, she responded like that again.

But this time, she was sure.

Every time she smiled brightly and spoke to her like that, she noticed that the curious look she’d give her gradually softened.

She felt the bond between them growing closer.

“Miss.”

One day, she spoke to her.

She hesitated for a long time after starting the conversation before finally speaking.

“May I ask, how old are you?”

It was a rather out-of-the-blue question.

But she was happy to be asked.

“My age—”

As it turned out, they were the same age.

What had started as a somewhat awkward conversation gradually flowed more naturally.

Even after changing her medication, the two of them continued to chat happily.

She seemed to enjoy talking to her more than to the servants.

Over and over, they spoke every day.

She found joy in those conversations.

She didn’t mind the hard work at all.

Even when a coworker quit and she had to take on sudden night shifts, or when another nurse went home early because of a sudden appointment, she was rather happy.

It meant more time to talk with her.

They got to know each other more and more.

She learned that she hadn’t always lived with that family.

That she didn’t even know who her father was until he showed up one day and took her to live with them.

Of course, she didn’t tell her everything.

But she didn’t think she was hiding anything.

It was just that she didn’t want to talk about it.

In those moments they spent together, she simply wanted to talk about happy things.

A few weeks later, she left the hospital again.

But she didn’t feel sad about it.

After all, she’d see her again soon.

*

“I’ve fallen in love with someone.”

When she returned, she said that.

Maybe it was because she’d fallen in love.

She said she had been introduced to him.

A man so wealthy that, even on a global scale, one could count on one hand the number of people richer than him.

At first, she thought it was just a marriage of convenience.

Her beauty was something anyone would covet.

But they weren’t just meeting because they had to.

‘Something you have to do’ and ‘something you want to do’ are different.

In life, the two rarely overlap.

But for her and him, they seemed to fit perfectly.

Soon, the two were married.

As her happiness grew, her illness improved.

The doctor cautiously speculated that it might have stemmed from a psychological cause.

Still, she wasn’t disheartened.

She had known this would happen someday.

She had known this would happen all along.

But she couldn’t help the dull ache in her chest.

Perhaps she had liked her more than just as a friend.

“Will you come to my wedding?”

“Of course, I have to go.”

She was beautiful in her wedding dress.

Although the design was simple and understated, it looked incredibly elegant.

Without dragging on the ground, she somehow knew how to exude grace with just her appearance.

She stared at her in a daze.

Luckily, that wasn’t the end of their relationship.

Though they loved each other, he was far too busy. Several times a month, he had to travel overseas, leaving her behind.

Maybe that’s why, soon, she began frequenting the hospital again.

Whenever he wasn’t around, she would stare out the window for hours.

He made every effort to visit her whenever she was in the hospital, but there were many times he couldn’t.

Her current caretakers were kinder than the ones her family had sent, but they still weren’t enough to heal her emotional wounds.

“……I have a request.”

“Tell me. I’ll do anything.”

At those words, she smiled.

“You’ve always been by my side.”

She couldn’t bring herself to reply.

“Could you stay by my daughter’s side as well? If I were to leave this world first.”

She couldn’t bring herself to reply.

*

In life, the overlap between ‘something you have to do’ and ‘something you want to do’ is rare.

But when she saw her, she realized.

With her beautiful, black hair and red eyes, like jewels.

With her white, porcelain skin.

Though she was still too young to tell for sure, she might one day grow to look just like her mother.

The young girl looked up at her.

“Hello.”

She greeted her.

“Hello.”

The young girl put her hands on her belly button and bowed politely.

She was still so young.

But somehow, in that gesture, she saw a glimpse of her mother, who had already passed away.

“I’m sorry. It was my wife’s last wish.”

“It’s okay.”

She smiled softly in response to his words, as he gently placed a hand on the child’s shoulder.

“I’m doing it because I want to.”

For the second time in her life, what she wanted to do and what she had to do overlapped.