Chapter 58 – I Am Cursed (3)

The scent of lavender hung heavy in the air, even before entering the city.

Perhaps it was because the fragrance had already permeated everything during the journey, enough to make one feel intoxicated.

Some had arrived in the city before the festival, but many others had only made it on the day of its commencement. A long line stretched from the town’s entrance, indicating the influx of latecomers.

The festival would continue for several days.

In fact, Patina had arrived in town much earlier, but she had been wandering outside the city, hesitant to enter, in case she ran into Cariel.

The Baronenes territory was relatively well-policed, with plenty of scenic spots to explore.

Moreover, this was the season when outsiders frequently visited, making the usual vigilance somewhat lax.

It was one such coincidence that led her to converse with a young demon who was painting a landscape, using the lavender fields as his backdrop.

“At first, there was relentless criticism. ‘How dare you join hands with mere demons?’ they said. But now, it stands as one of the most successful collaborations, and thanks to it, our relations with some territories have improved as well. I’d say it has been beneficial for everyone.”

The rumor that the Baronenes territory had allied with demons to develop their land had been a major topic of discussion at the time.

In just five years, the region had achieved unprecedented growth, incomparable to its previous state.

Though it was technically a barony, in terms of scale, it could easily rival larger territories.

Additionally, its close ties with the central government and its emperor-friendly political stance had led to support rather than opposition.

Back when Berke was still a kingdom, its relations with the Biedenberg family had been strained. However, after forming ties through Saint Cariel, the Baronenes side had been the first to lower their heads in reconciliation.

That connection had persisted to this day, making it a remarkably historic alliance.

Furthermore, the Biedenberg family had been instrumental in establishing the Berke Empire under the leadership of the Enjul family.

“I appreciate the conversation.”

“The pleasure was mine. It’s not every day one gets to talk with someone of your stature in a place like this.”

By the time she returned to the city, Patina was informed that Cariel had already left.

At the same time, she received information on the whereabouts of the person she sought.

The church was bustling with visitors and believers, a constant flow of people.

Upon entering, she made her way deeper inside.

After stating her identity and purpose, she was granted access even to the restricted areas, where outsiders were normally forbidden.

The person she was looking for was holed up in a guest chamber, drinking wine alone.

With striking red hair and a physique that could put most men to shame, the world knew her as the Saint of Protection, the Fourth Saint, Alesia.

“Sister, it’s been a while.”

“It may be festival season, but don’t you think the timing is a bit too coincidental?”

Alesia cast a hazy, intoxicated gaze at Patina with her red eyes.

“You’re probably right in what you suspect.”

“…I thought as much.”

Instead of a bottle, Alesia tilted an entire wooden cask to refill her cup.

She then took out another empty wooden cup and filled it as well.

“Drink. It’s awkward to be drinking alone in the Lord’s courtyard, so now I have an excuse.”

“…I’ll drink with gratitude.”

Patina quietly accepted the cup and brought it to her lips.

A brief but unnatural silence settled between them.

“He was someone worth boasting about.”

Alesia was the first to speak again.

“A remarkable person.”

“…….”

“I don’t know why he’s become so dark and brooding.”

No, she had a guess.

“Perhaps it was the excessive expectations and the weight of people’s scrutiny. One way or another, it must have been a burden on him.”

“…….”

“With peace settling in, the existing powers and ruling factions would have found an upstart hero with no noble blood entirely intolerable.”

Because he wasn’t born a noble.

As always, the blue-blooded aristocracy saw those they deemed inferior as unworthy of power. Their deeply ingrained elitism wouldn’t allow them to accept someone they considered primitive and beneath them.

…Not that everyone thought that way, of course.

Still, there were always those who exploited such ignorance to expand their influence, manipulating public sentiment and leveraging slander to strengthen their own standing.

“The empire isn’t the only place where that happens.”

“…I didn’t expect you to know that much.”

“It’s not that I know—I just assumed as much.”

Even if she hadn’t known the details, learning about it so late was still a problem in itself.

But even if she had found out sooner, would it have changed anything?

The ones who were meant to leave had already left.

“Sister, what did you think of him?”

“He was amazing. He looked exactly my type, had a thoughtful personality… I didn’t just like him, I was completely taken with him. It felt like switching between a good dream and a bad one over and over again. I’ve been dumped before, sure… but this one stings a bit more.”

“Sister….”

“I don’t really understand what kind of impossible expectations people placed on a hero’s lineage.”

Even so,

“…I can’t see why he had to grow up so dark.”

“That’s…”

Patina hesitated, unsure of what to say, and simply continued drinking.

“But did you know?”

“…What is it?”

“It’s about Cariel.”

Alesia paused for a long time.

As if contemplating whether or not she should bring it up.

…As if carefully weighing her words.

Patina felt uneasy.

What had she found out that she was hesitating so much to say it?

No matter how much Cariel resented his father and everyone else,

Patina knew, without a doubt, that he wouldn’t easily confide in just anyone.

They had known each other for far too long.

He was always called gloomy and brooding, and he had always been reserved in his interactions with others.

“…….”

When they were younger, he had been the complete opposite.

Had he changed?

Or had the world simply changed the way it treated him?

The princess would sometimes mention the possibility of external pressure, magical interference, or even some form of malevolent trickery at play.

But to seriously consider such vague possibilities…

“He says he’s been cursed by the Demon King.”

And so,

The moment those words left Alesia’s mouth,

Patina snapped out of her thoughts.

For a brief moment, she thought she had misheard.

She simply stared blankly.

“…Excuse me?”

“Didn’t you hear me?”

“No… wait. I was lost in thought for a second. I must have misheard something.”

“Then that means you actually heard me correctly.”

That couldn’t be.

“He said he was cursed by the Demon King. And then, half-mocking, he said he had aligned himself with the Demon King. When I first heard it, I also thought I must have misheard.”

Alesia let out a hollow, detached laugh.

“And then he told me that anyone who got involved with him would be doomed. That was the nature of the curse. But honestly, for someone trying to explain a curse, he wasn’t very clear about it, was he?”

“Th-that can’t be. Y-you must have misunderstood….”

“Patina.”

Alesia spoke with resignation.

“If neither you nor the other heroes knew… doesn’t that mean this is a very serious issue?”

“…….”

“You said he was like family. You said you thought of him as a younger brother.”

Then why,

“Why did you all do nothing while he was being pushed to the brink?”

“…….”

Patina’s head spun.

What had she just heard?

Had she misheard?

Was this some kind of nightmare?

Of all the possibilities,

Why did the Demon King’s name suddenly surface?

Wasn’t all of that supposed to be over?

What if…

What if the princess was right?

What if all the injustices that had befallen Cariel were, in truth, the work of the Demon King’s curse?

“…….”

Then when exactly had Cariel come to know about it?

The thought made her blood run cold.

Her back was already drenched in sweat, but she had no time to notice.

“You really didn’t know? Truly? Why am I the first one to… Ah, I see. I was the first one he told directly.”

What an…

“…Unbelievable situation.”

For a moment, Alesia felt drained.

That something so absurd, so beyond belief, could happen again,

It left her completely exhausted.

She didn’t even have the energy to drink anymore. That was new.

“If this information gets out, the entire capital will be in chaos, won’t it?”

“…….”

“Cariel must have left quietly because he had no intention of making a scene. He never seemed like the type to easily confide in others, after all.”

But still,

“…Am I too late again?”

“It’s not your fault, Sister. It’s really not.”

“Then whose fault is it?”

It was frustrating.

A sigh escaped her lips.

“I… I must have been the one who failed him.”

She should have tried harder to understand.

Even if the Demon King’s curse had clouded his mind and distorted his judgment…

…She shouldn’t have been swayed by it.

She should have watched over Cariel a little more closely, tried to understand him just a little more.

…She should have tried harder.

“I don’t know all the details either. I’m just telling you what I heard.”

Even as she spoke, Alesia seemed to be suppressing an underlying anger.

“I respect Lady Ermina and Lord Luelde. The other heroes too, of course.”

It was an undeniable fact that they had saved her.

If anything, the reason she had been educated and trained to become a saint was part of that same cause.

“But the next time I see them, I might just end up cursing them out without thinking. And I can’t quite decide if that would be right or wrong.”

“…Sister.”

“You and I were lucky. We fought side by side more than once, standing shoulder to shoulder.”

But,

“Everything you proudly told me back then… it was all about the past, wasn’t it? The past you remembered?”

She should have noticed how strange that was. She had been far too indifferent.

“Cariel had a notorious reputation in the capital. Maybe in the past, before I knew him, he truly was ruthless. I don’t know his past, so I can’t say for sure. But no matter how I think about it, I just can’t picture him that way.”

So let me ask you, the one who knew him best,

“Cariel—in recent years—not the past you remember, but the more recent past—was he truly the kind of person who deserved all that scorn? Did he do something so terrible?”

“I…”

She didn’t know for certain.

But the descendants of heroes were always subject to all sorts of slander.

She herself had been a target of endless insults simply because she had been cared for by a hero.

People might sing praises on the surface, but behind closed doors, they would sneer at the very idea of heroes.

She knew not everyone was malicious,

But she also knew that humanity was far from being purely good.

And yet, weren’t they always taught,

That true righteousness meant embracing even such darkness?

That true justice meant guiding and enlightening those people?

That, in the end, everyone would come to acknowledge it?

That was what Luelde and Ermina had always said.

And the fact that Patina herself had become a source of pride for the empire—wasn’t that proof of it?

So surely, Cariel would also…

……Had she simply been deceiving herself?

Had she assumed, without any real basis, that things would turn out the same for him?

A memory surfaced,

The lonely boy who had looked at her with a desolate gaze before turning his back.

And now that she thought about it,

That boy had…

At some point, he had stopped even looking at her.

She had been the one to initiate conversation.

Even that had been fueled by one-sided expectations,

A rather one-sided…

“He already knew you were following him.”

“…….”

“Do as you please. I don’t know anymore. I feel like my heart isn’t just unsettled—it’s about to shatter… I need to stay here and suppress this… anger? Sorrow? Whatever it is, I have to hold it down… or else I won’t be able to endure it.”

So? Do you have anything else you want to ask?

“…….”

There were many things she wanted to ask.

But looking at those empty eyes, that drained expression,

She found herself unable to say anything.

Moreover,

Patina herself felt as though something sharp was repeatedly stabbing at her chest.

As if something was seeping out from those wounds, slipping through the cracks.

Her strength drained away.

Her heart felt hollow.

“…You’re not in a good state either.”

At this point, Alesia couldn’t even bring herself to be resentful or angry.

She was like a lost lamb.

A lamb that had been running forward, convinced it knew the way—only to realize it had been lost all along.

Maybe that’s why,

She truly looked confused.

And honestly, yelling at someone this lost just felt… pointless.

“Forget it. Just drink.”

Alcohol was good.

If you drank enough, everything seemed lighter, easier to forget, and sometimes, even a foolish smile would surface.

Of course,

That wasn’t always the case.

Because when sorrow and rage swelled beyond words,

She had only become more ferocious.

She had thought she could wash it all away with alcohol, drown it, let it slip through her fingers.

But no.

In reality, all she had done was shove it into the farthest corners of her mind, cramming it into a space already overflowing with filth, burying it under more and more debris.

“Haa…”

At times like this, she should just sleep it off.

Even though the intoxication made her head foggy,

Why did that moment keep playing so vividly in her mind?

Her mind was far too clear, making sleep feel impossible.

Was it really that shocking?

She lifted the cask and tilted it,

But only a few droplets fell.

Even after holding it there for a long time, the amount was never enough.

She considered throwing the cask aside,

But in the end, she simply set it down quietly.

Maybe she,

More than she had thought,

More than she had realized,

Had loved him very deeply.