Chapter 524: Give it to me just once.

[What are you.]

This was the point when the strange immortal, the White Lotus Sword, and Namgung Bi-ah, who were in the chamber, went outside.

It was Shin Noyya who asked, looking at the Brain Worm.

Upon hearing that Namgung Bi-ah was going to the Northern Sea, I half-lost my mind and asked Namgung Myung about it, but.

He gave no answer.

As the silence continued, I was gradually getting angry.

At that point, I was already half out of my mind.

Should I say that boiling blood and heat had surged to the top of my head?

I was in a state of anger that was difficult to control.

Thinking about it now, it’s quite strange. Even considering it was an unexpected situation, it wasn’t something to get that angry about.

Emotions that are difficult for me to control always tend to get in the way.

The problem is that even knowing that, I can’t control them.

‘What are you?’

Before I could yell it out in a heated voice, Shin Noyya cut in, allowing me to cool down a bit.

What are you.

I recall what Shin Noyya said to Namgung Myung.

Was it the day before yesterday or the day before that? What Noyya said to Namgung Myung was similar.

-You are not Myung-i.

Shin Noyya, who had been quietly observing Namgung Myung raising his voice at Noyya, concluded with a firm voice towards the end.

That person is not Namgung Myung.

‘Then who on earth is it.’

If that isn’t Namgung Myung’s lingering thought, then what on earth could it be?

[…Kekeke…]

After Shin Noyya’s question, a faint chuckle was heard from the Brain Worm.

[…You ask what I am, Shin-cheol. It’s amusing you’re joking.]

[Does it look like a joke?]

Woong.

I felt heat from my heart. It wasn’t mine.

A plum blossom fragrance began to flow subtly along the acupoints.

It was light yet deep. Deep yet somehow transparent, like porcelain.

This was definitely Shin Noyya’s energy.

[You are not Myung-i. Isn’t that right.]

[…Ha…]

Namgung Myung laughed at the firm words.

[Then who am I supposed to be? I am Namgung Myung.]

Namgung Myung said coldly, as if telling him not to say something absurd, but Shin Noyya’s reaction was the same.

[Even if you deceived your descendant, do you think it makes sense to try and deceive us?]

[Shin-cheol…!]

[You are not Myung-i.]

Woowoong-!

At Shin Noyya’s words, the Brain Worm held in my hand began to tremble violently.

[Stop talking bullshit. I am Namgung Myung. If I’m not Namgung Myung, then who am I?]

Deudeudeudeuk-! It was a vibration enough to make my hands tremble.

Tiktik! Sparks flew in the air. It was due to the faint brain energy spreading from the Brain Worm.

[After appearing after all that long time, are you trying to insult me? You, me?]

[Yes, it must have been a very long time.]

Noyya’s memory is empty.

For some reason, it was full of discrepancies; he had said that the empty memories in the gaps were fractured as if broken into pieces.

What did he say again?

Did he say he woke up sealed inside a demonic object?

It was a story slightly different from history.

In the recorded history of Hwasan, the Hwasan Sword Saint was said to have ended his life immediately after fulfilling his role as the sect leader.

However, in the actual conversation with the lingering thought I met.

I could tell that history was somehow wrong.

It twisted somewhere along the line.

Whether it was Yeon Il-cheon’s associates from the past who did something, or perhaps the Blood Demon’s side, I don’t know, but.

There was definitely a problem.

Perhaps, Noyya is the one most concerned about that.

[Yes. It was incredibly long. You, who haven’t experienced such long years. What do you know to speak like that?]

Namgung Myung’s voice was full of anger.

It was the same last time.

Namgung Myung had gotten angry at Shin Noyya, who hadn’t experienced the same years, like this.

[You still know nothing.]

The anger was justified.

If it were me, remaining as a lingering thought for those long years, waiting for someone who might never come, I might have gone half mad.

However.

[You are right. I don’t know.]

Shin Noyya seemed to think differently.

[However, at the very least, I know you are not Myung-i.]

[This bastard… truly…!]

[It must have been a very long time. Mountains crumbled. And nameless streets and countless people appeared upon them.]

Shaolin’s Huang A-bul-yeong was in a state where he barely held onto his sanity, exhausted to the point of pity by the weight of time.

Tang Je-mun endured his entire life with the sole conviction of protecting Noyya.

However, the Tang Clan he wanted to protect had rotted away.

It was too long a time.

To endure that time, it was a change mixed with devolution and corruption.

Looking at it, would this world truly have been right for those who harbored the will to save it?

It would be amazing enough just not to have gone mad already.

And yet.

‘Noyya wouldn’t possibly not know that.’

Why does Noyya state that it’s not Namgung Myung, regarding that voice?

I still couldn’t understand.

Just then, Noyya began to speak again.

[Time is inherently like that, so even if you lost your original form, it cannot be helped.]

[You, who knows that, are insulting me now?]

[Even that steadfast Cheol-yeong fellow lost hope, so it must be unavoidable.]

[Then at least….]

[But you see.]

What is it?

‘…This…’

The two were having a conversation, but for some reason, I felt cold sweat running down my back.

The air is heavy. It’s not Namgung Myung’s issue. This is.

‘Is it Shin Noyya’s senses?’

The atmosphere is changing according to Noyya’s emotions.

‘Huh.’

Realizing that, I felt I understood anew just how amazing this old man is.

Someone whose lingering thought remains without a physical body, possessing this much presence just by controlling their emotions.

While seeming like a grumpy old man, he showed a different side at times like this.

In the heavily pressing air, Shin Noyya speaks to Namgung Myung.

[At least, that fellow didn’t lose his conviction.]

[…!]

[I don’t feel such conviction in you. Despite that, are you truly Namgung Myung?]

In the voice speaking nonchalantly, something was clearly contained.

A trust so profound that I couldn’t dare to recognize it.

Something distant that allowed him to speak the word ‘conviction’ so firmly.

[…]

Was it Noyya’s words that were the problem?

Namgung Myung paused for a moment, and shortly after, spoke with a dry voice.

[…Knowing how many years have passed, you say such things now?]

Even if there was conviction, it was time enough to have crumbled away long ago.

Such years have passed.

It was strange to think that conviction still remained.

[What is strange?]

[You, who experienced nothing, what right do you have to say such things? At least… at least you shouldn’t have said that.]

Unlike those who remained, Shin Noyya, who hadn’t experienced those long years, shouldn’t speak like that.

Even I could understand Namgung Myung’s argument.

He had struggled his guts out to remain, yet someone who wakes up after hundreds of years comes and questions why he’s changed – it was enough to make anyone furious.

The problem is…

‘That he seems bothered by something.’

From Namgung Myung’s voice speaking like that, I felt something unsettling.

Shin Noyya seemed to have sensed that aspect as well.

[…Conviction, yes. One can lose it. I have no right to curse that.]

[…]

[However, if you were going to do it, you should have done it properly.]

[What do you mean….]

Somehow, Noyya’s voice seemed to be gradually lowering.

[If you were going to lose conviction, you should have done only that. Isn’t desire filling the place where conviction was lost?]

[…!]

[Are you going to deny this as well?]

With the weighty words, the air lowered once more.

Desire fills the place where conviction was lost. What could that mean?

I couldn’t know. But Namgung Myung seemed to have some inkling.

[I feel nothing but desire in you. The greed to properly establish the clan. The impatience to fix the ruined swordsmanship. That’s all there is.]

[What… what is wrong with that? Even in this state, should I have only craved peace and left Namgung behind? What kind of selfish words are those?!]

It’s a world that had already rotted away.

Rather than foolishly waiting here, shouting for peace, I’d save my own kin.

In a way, it could be considered the most rational thought.

It was the same thing said last time.

Because there is Hwasan, which lost nothing, Shin Noyya cannot understand Namgung Myung.

It was a correct statement, but Shin Noyya’s voice only became clearer upon hearing it.

[That’s right. It’s selfish, to be honest. It wouldn’t be strange for anyone to do so.]

[But how…!]

[If that wasn’t Namgung Myung, that is.]

There was strength in the voice that seemed to be cutting off words.

[He had a saying he always used. If you are Namgung Myung, you would know it.]

[…]

[Do you know? He said this even when his whole body was covered in blood.]

Namgung Myung falls silent.

Is it because he doesn’t know? Or because he cannot speak it?

I couldn’t know this time either.

[Namgung, left alone amidst a crumbling world, is unnecessary.]

[…!]

[He used to say that the sword of the Namgung family would become a king, a sword to protect someone. But what use is a sword with no one to protect? That’s what he said every day.]

A ruler without subjects is meaningless.

It was arrogant and obnoxious words, but because ‘heart’ (心) was contained within them, I felt a resonance somewhere.

[If Myung-i had lost his conviction, he would have cut his own throat right then and there. Filling the empty space with desire? Ridiculous words.]

Now I could understand.

The reason Noyya’s voice grew darker and colder wasn’t because his emotions were drying up.

Rather.

‘He’s angry.’

He was becoming cold precisely because he was so angry.

[Therefore, do not insult my close friend any further.]

Perhaps it was the immense meaning imbued in his voice. For a moment, my breathing seemed to stop.

I wanted to butt into the conversation, but I couldn’t utter a single word, suppressed by Noyya’s aura.

I was truly amazed by that trust.

‘How could that be?’

The certainty that even if his close friend had fallen, he wouldn’t have become like that.

The trust built up to gain that.

What kind of life did he live? What kind of relationships did he build to be able to trust so transparently?

As someone who hadn’t lived like that, it was an incomprehensible relationship.

[I ask again. Who are you?]

[…Shin-cheol.]

Namgung Myung’s voice calling Shin Noyya seemed somewhat trembling. Or perhaps resigned.

After remaining silent for a long time like that, Namgung Myung began to speak again.

[I… I am… Namgung Myung.]

It was the same as before this time.

[This bastard… truly….]

[Only…]

[Not the main body.]

At the words Namgung Myung uttered last, Shin Noyya, who was about to roar in anger, stopped.

[…What? What did you just say?]

Main body? What does this mean now?

At the sudden, nonsensical words, my eyes widened too.

As I rolled my eyes, wondering what it was, Namgung Myung continued speaking.

[I am the lingering attachment the main body left behind for Namgung.]

[…What. Lingering attachment? Then where did the real Myung-i go?]

Putting aside the talk about main bodies and such.

If what’s speaking now is something like dregs, then where is the actual real Namgung Myung?

Even Shin Noyya asked with surprise.

Namgung Myung answered this.

[…The Northern Sea. He is in the Northern Sea.]

Of all things, the name of that damn land popped out again.

---

I opened my eyes.

For some reason, my heavy eyelids felt bothersome.

“…Ugh…”

I pushed myself up as if staggering. When I moved my arms, I felt a strange muscle ache.

‘What the?’

I sat up, clutching my head, and thought.

When did I lose consciousness? Was the memory up until just now a dream?

A dream where Namgung Myung and Noyya were conversing. No, it didn’t seem like a dream.

As we talked like that, upon hearing the name Northern Sea, I think I suddenly grabbed the Brain Worm and went out.

Right after that, I intended to duel Namgung Bi-ah.

I the Brain Worm… Ah.

‘Right, I used the Brain Worm.’

I also remembered that after trying to exert energy here and there, the Brain Worm suddenly activated.

And then, while dueling with it… I lost.

Yeah, I lost. I lost to Namgung Bi-ah.

I got cocky with swordsmanship, wielding a sword I knew nothing about, got hit by a feint, and was defeated.

And then….

‘…’

Jjak-!

Suddenly, a memory of something touching my lips surfaced, and I slapped my cheek.

It was because I felt heat rising to my face.

That’s as far as my memory goes. Damn clearly, too.

So, what is this situation now?

Why did I lose consciousness and then wake up?

‘…No way.’

Did I faint just because of a little kiss?

Wow, that’s quite problematic.

‘It’s too embarrassing….’

To faint just from a little kiss? I couldn’t accept that.

If that were really the case, I would have bitten my tongue and died right then.

‘Don’t just think about it. Should I die now? Yeah, that would be better.’

Just as I was about to attempt the real thing instead of indulging in pathetic worries out of embarrassment.

[Stop doing foolish things. It’s not like that.]

Noyya spoke to me in a voice filled with pity.

[To be doing things like that the moment you wake up… What should I do with this fellow, truly?]

‘You say it’s not? Then what is it? Why was I lying down?’

[What are you asking? It’s the backlash from using the Brain Worm.]

‘Huh?’

Backlash?

Perhaps thanks to Noyya’s words, a belated memory surfaced.

Right after being surprise-kissed by Namgung Bi-ah. Frozen like stone for a few seconds. It was the moment I realized my mistake and tried to move my body.

At that time.

-Ugh…!

I suddenly had to grab my chest.

It was because immense pain suddenly struck my heart.

And not long after, I lost consciousness.

‘…That’s the backlash from using the Brain Worm?’

[I told you, why did you step up to use something that doesn’t even fit you!]

Clearly, there were no major issues when touching it, let alone using it?

‘Except that it consumes quite a lot of energy… it seemed okay… Is the backlash really that severe?’

[In the first place, using such a demonic object. Wouldn’t it be stranger to assume there would be no backlash at all?]

‘But…. the Demon Core….’

[Didn’t you say that yourself? The Demon Core is less efficient than the Brain Worm.]

‘…’

I felt a bit of sharpness in the words.

This old man is now holding a grudge because I compared the Demon Core and the Brain Worm.

‘…I apologize for that.’

[Ptooey.]

I tried apologizing, but Shin Noyya didn’t seem like he’d be appeased by that.

Putting this aside for now. According to Noyya’s words, it wasn’t a strange thing.

Just the energy felt when using the Brain Worm alone, it would be strange for there to be no backlash in strengthening the body so much.

‘Does that mean it didn’t just consume energy?’

The problem is, in my past life, right after Ma-geom-hu used the Brain Worm. I never saw him feel this much pain.

‘I saw him looking exhausted from using up all his energy, but I never saw him feel that much pain.’

This means, it’s highly likely that it’s my own problem.

If I were to find the cause.

‘Because I tried to use something that didn’t fit me….’

As Noyya said.

It must be a side effect of using a demonic object that didn’t fit me in the first place.

After all, covering an item said to be used with brain energy with fire energy and using it, it’s strange that I could use it at all.

‘If I had known this would happen, I wouldn’t have used it.’

Leaving aside the demonic object’s performance itself, it was an item that yielded no efficiency even when I used it.

To almost die trying to use it out of useless curiosity.

‘…Speaking of which. How did I actually use it?’

Backlash or whatever, first I needed to figure out how I could use the Brain Worm.

As I tried to think about the reason for this.

[Kid. This isn’t the time for that, is it?]

Noyya spoke to me.

‘Huh?’

[Can’t you see beside you?]

What is he talking about?

Following Noyya’s words, I looked beside me.

There.

“…Huh…?”

My father, sitting and drinking tea.

And across from him, Moyong Hi-ah, Wi Seol-ah, and Namgung Bi-ah were sitting with their heads bowed low.

‘…’

Seeing that, I nodded slightly and lay back down on the bed.

It must still be a dream.

Thinking so, I closed my eyes, but.

It didn’t take ten seconds to realize it wasn’t a dream.